Eye of the Beholder
by ArthursCamelot
Summary: What if Buffy was able to stop Acathla without sending Angel to Hell?  What would happen next?  Drama, drama, drama will ensue! B/A Season 3 Rewrite
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: I'm Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack! I know, I was gone for so long, right? 10 days. Wow. **

**This story literally just wrote itself. I'm almost finished with it. Only 7 more chapters and I'm done. Yes, it only took me a week and a half to write 18 of 25 chapters. Surprised, mildly impressed? So am I. :D**

**So, moving on. This story is different from Two Sides and AISHB. Buffy and Angel are totally different in those two stories. They've been through Hell (literally for Angel) and they've come out on top of it. Well, this story is an alternate Season 3...so this Buffy and Angel character reactions include, but are not limited to: stupidity, irresponsibleness, more stupidity, more irresponsibleness, jumping to conclusions, fighting and then **_**not**_** talking about it, lots of Angel broodiness, lots of Buffy tears, lots and lots and lots and lots of DRAMA.**

**Clear everything up for ya? :D**

**I'm just warning you guys. We're all used to a more mature Buffy and Angel. I had to take a few steps back with this story, so it was difficult to get in the groove at the beginning, but I go there and then I was hooked. Hence me finishing this story as quickly as I did.**

**Also, since I am totally going my own way with S3 for the first 18 chapters, I'm incorrporating different little tid bits from later seasons. Most of it is dialogue. I've sort of switched some things around and have some things happening earlier than in canon, so just a head's up there.**

**Okay...I think that's everything. Knowing me I totally forgot something ridiculously important because right now my only thought is posting this chapter and then checking my Inbox religiously for alerts and reviews. Yes, I really think you guys bribed or brainwashed me somewhere along the line. It's like I live to write for you. :D**

**Random Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy...(I'm trying something new)**

**Me: Okay, guys, chop, chop! Angelus, why are you still here?**

**Angelus: **_**Because I'm about to awaken Acathla and send the world to Hell!**_

**Buffy: **_**Uh, I don't think so.**_

**Angelus: **_**You can't stop me Buff.**_

**Me: Angelus, my dear, sweet, evil boy...I've seen the episode. She totally kicks your ass.**

**Angelus: (laughs) **

**Me: I'm serious...**

**Angelus: **_**Prove it.**_

**Me: (shrugs) You asked for it.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter One<p>

Buffy had fought so hard. So, so hard.

This was it.

She took another step back as Angel…no, he wasn't her Angel. He had his face, his eyes, his body…but not his soul. No, this was not her Angel.

The creature in front of her was a menace. Evil personified. Angelus was everything she fought against. It was her duty to kill him. To end him. To stop him.

But she couldn't.

Because it was Angel.

No. It was Angelus. Angel was gone.

Gone.

The demon in front of her had Angel's face, but not his expression. Angelus was arrogant, smirking as he backed her into a corner. He radiated an aura of danger, of skill, of intelligence. Cold and calculating.

Angelus had Angel's eyes too, but they were not the same. When she looked into his chocolate brown eyes she no longer saw warmth or compassion. Gone was the depth and the honesty and the selflessness. Instead, it had been killed; slain by greed, arrogance, and insanity.

Angelus smirked at her, swishing his sword back and forth in front of her tauntingly. She could see it in his eyes. He was going to kill her, and he was going to enjoy it.

Buffy was weaponless…but even more so she felt helpless. Hopeless.

"Now that's everything, huh?" Angelus said with a dangerous smile. "No weapons…no friends…no hope."

Buffy closed her eyes. She had to focus and accept the facts for what they were. This was not Angel in front of her. It was Angelus. Angel was made to love her. Angelus was made to hate her. Angel was gone. Angelus was here.

This wasn't about her anymore. It was about the world and the people in it, the people who unbeknownst to them put their lives in her hands. She had to save them. She had to save herself. Angel was gone…

Buffy knew what she had to do.

"Take all that away…" Angelus trailed off tauntingly, enjoying how she'd closed her eyes to prepare for the worst. Oh, how he loved messing with her. "…and what's left?"

Angelus thrust the sword straight at Buffy's face, right between her eyes. With lightning fast reflexes, Buffy trapped the blade between her palms, stopping its progress. Her eyes snapped open, boring into his, shining bright in determination.

"Me," Buffy answered grimly, shoving the sword away from her forcefully, causing the hilt to hit Angelus in the face.

Momentarily stunned by Buffy's trick, Angelus stumbled back. Buffy hopped to her feet, not willing to give him any advantage. She kicked him in the chest, causing him to stagger back a few feet, and Buffy quickly retrieved her sword as he tried to regain his balance.

Buffy swung her sword around and thrust it at him, but Angelus had managed to recover from her blitz attack somewhat and was able to parry. They continued on like this for a minute or so, each of them parrying each other's blows, neither of them able to make any offensive progress.

Spinning around, Buffy brought her sword down from above, Angelus only just managing to get his sword up in time to block the blow. However, the sheer force of the hit caused him to drop to one knee. Seeing her chance, Buffy spun and dealt a roundhouse kick that sent Angelus sprawling on the ground.

Not wasting time, Buffy kicked Angelus while he was down, sending him flying through the open doors back inside the mansion. She followed him and was right there waiting when he finally stopped rolling on the floor. Buffy swung and brought her sword down over her head, but with not even a second to spare Angelus blocked the blow and rolled to his feet away from her, trying to once again gain his footing.

Buffy lunged at him, trying to see a break in his defenses, but there were none. This only made her fight harder.

Her fiery determination paid off when she felt her blade slice the flesh of his hand, causing Angleus to drop his sword and cradle his cut hand. Buffy kicked him in the face, causing him to fly back into the not yet awake Acathla.

He fell, landing on his knees before her.

Buffy raised her sword, seeing her chance. This was it. She could do it. It wasn't Angel. Angel was gone. Her Angel was gone. Gone. She had to do this. She had to. For the world. The world came before her. Everyone came before her. This was her job. This was her duty.

She had to kill him. Now.

Buffy was just about to bring her sword down for the fatal blow, when Angelus gasped loudly and then groaned in pain. His eyes glowed bright red for a moment before returning to their usual chocolate brown. Angelus looked up at her, but then quickly collapsed on the floor in front of her, a sob escaping him.

Buffy looked at him warily. Angelus didn't cry…it couldn't be…no, she couldn't dare to hope.

It could be a trick, a cheap, dirty trick that had Angelus's name all over it.

Angelus raised himself back up and looked into her eyes. Buffy felt her resolve falter as she looked at him…the warm chocolate brown eyes that could melt her to the core were filled with tears. They held so much pain and confusion…it couldn't be…

"Buffy?" Angel asked softly. "What's going on?" he asked as a sob escaped him.

Angel was scared, and the feeling unnerved him, which only served to enhance his fear. Angel himself was scared of very few things. His fears were not the normal kind, such as being afraid of heights or spiders or snakes. His fears went much deeper. He feared himself. He feared what he was capable of. He feared for Buffy. Those were his fears.

He felt vulnerable. He was confused, so incredibly confused. What had happened? Angel tried to remember…

Buffy stared at him confused and shocked. What _was_ going on? Buffy didn't dare begin to hope that maybe, just maybe…

She still held her sword in front of her as Angel got to his feet and looked around, confusion splaying all over his features. "Where are we?" he asked. He hated that he had no idea where they were. "I-I don't remember."

Buffy dropped her sword as she finally accepted what she was seeing. Angel, her Angel. He was back. Willow…Willow had done the spell. She'd done it. She'd saved him. She'd saved both of them. Angel was back…her Angel was back.

"Angel?" she whispered, hardly daring to breathe as she waited for everything to go wrong again.

"You're hurt," Angel observed. He immediately reached out to touch her cut arm, and Buffy knew for certain that this was her Angel. He always put her first.

Feeling his gentle touch on her arm, Buffy was overwhelmed. She ignored her cut and threw her arms around him. Slightly stunned, Angel was still for a moment before he quickly regained his bearings and returned the embrace, holding her tightly even if his mind was racing, trying to figure everything out.

"Oh, Buffy," Angel sighed into her hair, squeezing his eyes shut as bits and pieces of blurry images began to filter into his brain. Slowly, he was realizing what had happened. "…God," he whispered painfully as an all too familiar guilt flooded his heart.

"I…I feel like I haven't seen you in months," Angel admitted softly as Buffy held him tighter before relaxing, a deep sigh escaping her. "Everything's so muddled, I…"

However, he paused as Buffy suddenly stiffened in his arms. "Buffy?" he questioned worriedly. "What is it?"

Buffy didn't answer immediately. Instead, she picked up her sword and cut Angel's arm. Angel was so surprised that he didn't even have the thought to hiss in pain. He just stared uncomprehendingly at her.

Buffy was kicking herself. She'd felt so safe with Angel's arms around her, she'd felt as though she were invincible. Then, Whistler's words suddenly sounded in her mind…

"_Angel's the key. His blood will open the door to Hell, and only his blood will close it. Acathla opens his big mouth, creates a vortex, and you're too late. One blow will send 'em both back to Hell."_

Ignoring Angel's questions, she quickly stabbed Acathla before the vortex could open, her sword piercing the stone like butter. Impatiently, she waited to see if anything would happen. She almost expected the vortex to appear despite her quick thinking, to laugh in her face and tell her it was all in vain. She couldn't have lived with herself if she'd sent Angel to Hell.

"Buffy?" Angel questioned again. "What's going on?"

"Hopefully, nothing," Buffy answered, her gaze moving away from Acathla slowly, ready to take immediate action the moment something went wrong.

Angel stared at Buffy confused. He glanced back at Acathla. Yes, he knew what it was. What demon didn't? Angel's only question was what it was doing _here_. A horrifying thought entered Angel's mind…no…_he_ wouldn't…

Angel shuddered and closed his eyes tightly, trying to wish the thought away, but even more so the gut feeling that told him he was right.

What had he done?

Buffy was coiled to spring. At what, she didn't exactly know. She was just waiting for something to happen, anything. Angel was quiet and looking confused and scared, a look that had Buffy sick with worry. Buffy stared at Acathla again, and something in her gut told her that it was done. That it was all over.

It was all over. Done. Finished.

The catharsis that rushed through her was overwhelming and caught Buffy completely off guard. She exhaled a shuddering breath and Angel's eyes were immediately on her, forgetting everything but her as it usually happened when Buffy was involved. Buffy turned towards him, and Angel was already pulling her into his arms.

Buffy threw her arms around Angel's neck before crying into his shoulder. The idea that it was all over seemed unreal. Months of Angelus, months of worry, months of second-guessing…it was all over. Angel was back, and everything would be okay…it had to be.

"Buffy," Angel whispered, kissing her hair and rubbing his hand up and down her back soothingly, even if in the back of his mind he was still trying to sort through everything. "Ssh, it's okay."

Buffy looked up at him, and tenderly caressed his cheek. It was the first time in months that she'd seen him. His soft, brown eyes that she got lost in every time she looked at him, the way he could just look at her and make her heart skip a beat. Her fingers grazed over his lips, and their eyes met.

"Buffy." Angel caressed her name in a whisper.

Entranced by her gaze, Angel tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, before letting his hand settle at the nape of her neck. Gently, he pulled her face up to his, and their lips met softly, just barely brushing against each other.

It was like coming home.

Burning passion ignited in the both of them the moment their lips met, and the kiss quickly escalated, their lips moving in synchronization with a practiced ease. They both allowed themselves to forget about the present time, about the current events. They took comfort in each other. Angel momentarily forgot about the fact that he had been Angelus and tried to end the world by awakening Acathla (at least that was his best guess, and sadly, his best guesses were usually right). Buffy allowed herself to forget that she'd been haunted by a demon with her lover's face. She forgot that she'd only minutes ago committed to kill him to save the world.

They finally pulled away, and Buffy rested her forehead against his, refusing to pull completely away from him.

But as was the case with them, Angel was the first to pull away.

He stared at her for a moment. Cold, harsh reality settled over him as he stared into her green eyes that he loved so much. She was the light to his darkness, she was his best friend, she was his savior.

But he'd been selfish.

He'd had her heart, but it hadn't been enough. He'd wanted her body too.

But he'd resisted, stopping their kisses when he felt his control slipping. How many times had he come so close to getting carried away? Too many.

He'd known that something would happen the moment he turned his back that night in his apartment to let her change. Then, he'd been _absolutely sure_ something would happen when he touched her bare shoulder. She'd looked at him the moment he'd touched her skin. The look in her eyes had nearly caused him to shudder. Then, she'd made the first move. The last thing he'd expected. It had caught him off guard when she'd kissed him.

He'd been lost the moment their lips had touched.

He had been so happy that night. Angel had plenty of experience with woman. He had _centuries_ of experience. He'd had tons of sex in his time. But he'd never made love until that night with Buffy.

Of course, he should have known that he couldn't have happiness. He should have known...he should have known.

This was all his fault. This was what he got for giving into his own desires, for not being strong enough.

The memories were muddled, but slowly they were becoming clear. If he really concentrated they would become a little bit stronger, more real. Angel held in an exasperated sigh. He wanted to remember everything. He hated not knowing for sure. He needed to know. He needed to know what was going on. He needed to know everything.

"What happened?" he asked seriously.

Buffy immediately dropped her gaze and stared at his chest, beginning to fiddle with the collar of his shirt. She couldn't meet his eyes.

Angel didn't take this as a good sign.

It was going to be bad. It was going to be terrible, but he still had to know. He needed to know. He needed the knowledge of all that he had done as Angelus, even though it would hurt him, even though he would hate himself.

"Buffy," Angel implored. "Tell me."

"I love you," Buffy said instead, and Angel felt his heart sink. "Always...no matter what."

"Buffy," Angel entreated softly, begging her to tell him with his eyes.

Buffy looked up at him, feeling his intense gaze, and her heart dropped to her knees. How could she tell him? How? What could she say?

"I need to know," Angel said softly, his eyes filled with pain. "What did I do?"

The words were hardly out of his mouth before suddenly he remembered it all. He vividly remembered killing Jenny Calander. He recalled the smugness Angelus had felt, the twisted sense of humor in which he had set up a seemingly romantic evening at Giles' apartment. He could remember snapping her neck like a twig. Easy, simple. He remembered the satisfied thrill he'd gotten out of it.

He remembered killing a girl from Buffy's school.

He remembered attacking Willow and Xander.

He'd tortured Giles.

He'd tortured Buffy, too.

God, what had he done? Self-loathing coursed through him, the added weight of the already heavy burden he carried causing his shoulders to slump. Angel closed his eyes, and fought back tears as he saw all the victims faces. There were so many more that Buffy didn't know about. So many more.

Everything with Dru and Spike. There was more that Buffy didn't know about…especially concerning Dru.

"Angel?" Buffy asked softly, causing him to open his eyes to look at her.

The pain in Angel's eyes caused Buffy to flinch. She ached to hold him and comfort him like he did for her, but she didn't know how it'd be received. So she stood there worriedly, nervously waiting for a reaction.

Angel stared at her. He watched the emotions play across her face. Nervousness, worry, and anxiety paled in comparison to the incredible, infinite, undying, unshakable love that shone brightly in her eyes.

Angel suddenly couldn't stand to be in the same room with Buffy. He felt the need to escape. To escape her gaze so he could hide from her. That way she wouldn't realize what a monster he was.

But of course she realized what a monster he was. She'd witnessed it all…and she hadn't even seen him at his worst. Oh, he'd just been getting warmed up.

Angel shuddered at the images and fantasies that flashed through his mind.

How could she be near him? How could she still hold him? How could she still kiss him? How could she still look at him with love shining in her beautiful green eyes? How, after everything he had done? How could she even _look_ at him?

He backed away then, and Buffy looked up at him in surprise. Confusion colored her features, "Angel?"

"Buffy." He almost looked into her eyes, but he stopped himself. He didn't deserve to see the love that he knew was there. He didn't deserve it. He didn't deserve her.

Of course, he'd known this from the start. From the moment he'd first laid eyes on her, he'd known that he'd loved her. It was odd feeling love after going for centuries without it. It had felt foreign. The warmth in his chest, the lightness. The happiness.

Happiness…Angel scowled.

"I have to go," he said quickly, staring at her, but never meeting her gaze.

"What? Why?" Buffy asked as his words sent fear shooting down her spine.

"I can't be here," Angel shook his head. "Not after this…not after what I've done."

"You haven't done anything," Buffy argued. "Stay."

"I haven't done anything?" Angel repeated, finally meeting her gaze and Buffy almost recoiled at the disdain in his eyes. "Look at what I've done!" he yelled as he pointed towards Acathla. "I almost ended the world! I killed Jenny! I killed so many people! I haunted you! I mocked you! I tortured you for months! I shadowed your every step, fantasizing about the many ways I'd kill you! I put Willow in the hospital! I attacked everyone closest to you! How have I not done anything?" he exclaimed angrily, tears in his eyes.

"That wasn't you," Buffy shook her head quickly, refusing to accept what he was saying. "You're not him!"

"No," Angel agreed lowly. "No, I'm not." Angel looked into her eyes then, his gaze hard and steely. "But he's a part of me. He's a part of what makes me who I am."

"Maybe that's true," Buffy conceded the point. "But that doesn't matter to me. I love—"

"Don't say it!" Angel interrupted, cutting her off. "Don't say it," he repeated in a whisper. "I don't deserve all that you have to give."

"But…" Buffy began, however Angel shook his head.

"No," he said sadly. "No. I can't be with you. I won't hurt you ever again. I can't protect you."

"What are you talking about?" Buffy asked confused and hurt, but those emotions were meaningless compared to the pure fear that was gripping her heart in a vice. "You can protect me from anything!" she argued.

"I can't protect you from myself," Angel replied softly, his eyes filled with anguish. "That much I've proven."

"Angel, no," Buffy whispered brokenly. "No...I-I just got you back..."

Angel felt his heart cry out at her words, at her pain. It caused his already guilty conscience to sky rocket into oblivion. "I can't be here...not anymore."

With a willpower that Angel didn't even know he possessed, he turned his back on Buffy and left...escaping.

Buffy watched Angel go. She willed her legs to move, but they wouldn't comply. She willed her voice to work, but her protesting cry died on her lips. She watched as the only man she would ever love slipped into the shadows and disappeared.

She'd saved the world.

She'd saved him.

She'd saved herself.

And yet, she'd still lost.

**Are we feeling the angst yet? Muahahahahahhahahahahahahaha...there is SO much more where that came from!**

**Review? Pretty Please? With a strawberry on top, cause I'm weird like that?**

**ArthursCamelot**

**P.S. In case you guys didn't notice, I did twist Whistler's words just a little bit to fit the story. :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay, let me just take a moment and revel in the awesomeness that is my readers, reviews, alerts, etc. YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING! I love you so much.**

**I'm really glad you guys are liking where this story is going. It was awkward for me to write at times, what with all the angst that I am _definitely_ not used to writing so much angsty goodness! I did add fluffy moments though for those of you who aren't Angst's biggest fans! :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy).**

**Me: Angel? Angel? Where are you?**

**Angel: _..._**

**Me: Fine! Go disappear and brood.**

**Xander: _What's the problem with that?_**

**Me: Shut up, Xander! Without Angel I'm nothing...**

**Buffy: _(coughs pointedly and glares) Uh, excuse me? _**

**Me: (wide-eyed and innocent) What?**

**Willow: _(whispers excitedly) I know a secret!_**

**Me: (whispers back) I know! I came up with it!**

**Buffy: _Uh, can we get to the chapter guys? I really wanna know this secret..._**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter Two<p>

Buffy didn't know how long she stood there staring at where Angel had just been. Had this really just happened? Buffy didn't know, and it bothered her. He had just been kissing her. She could still taste him on her lips. She'd thought that everything was fine.

What now?

A noise behind her caused Buffy to whirl around, picking up her sword as she spun to face the new arrivals.

"Whoa, easy there Buff," Xander raised his hands up in front of her, placating. "We're friendly's."

However, Buffy wasn't listening to him. Her gaze immediately zeroed in on Giles who stood beside Xander; albeit the Watcher was more or less leaning on Xander to _remain_ standing, but he was on his feet nonetheless.

Buffy worriedly rushed to his side. "Oh my god, Giles! Are you okay?" she asked quickly, before shaking her head as she looked him over. "Gah, that's a stupid question, don't answer it."

"I'll be alright," Giles replied, managing a tight, weak smile for her benefit.

"We were just, uh, checkin' to see that all was safe in the world," Xander motioned to the silent Acathla in front of them.

Buffy glanced back at the statue, her expression immediately becoming more somber as it reminded her that Angel had left again. "Yeah…everything's fine…" she mumbled as she tried to keep her tone devoid of the dejection she felt.

"Don't worry about it Buffster," Xander shrugged, thinking he knew her problem. "There's other fish in the sea."

Buffy's brow furrowed. "What?"

"You know," Xander encouraged. This was great! Dead Boy was gone and dust! "You dusting Dead Boy and all…"

"What?" Buffy repeated, this time in outrage. "No! I didn't kill Angel!"

Giles opened his mouth to speak, but Xander spoke first. "What? You mean that Angelus is just wondering around town, looking for a snack? God, Willow! He'll go after her! We have to get to the hospital…"

"Xander!" Buffy cried out, wide-eyed at his words. "He's not Angelus anymore! He's Angel! Willow's spell worked!" Despite herself Buffy couldn't help her softened tone as she told them of Willow's success, or the small hint of a smile that pulled at her lips.

"If this is true, then where is he?" Giles asked tiredly, and Buffy's attention was immediately on him.

"Giles, we can totally hash this out later." Buffy avoided the question nicely, even if it was blaringly obvious. "Right now, we need to get you to the hospital."

"But what about—," Xander began, but Buffy silenced him with a glare.

"Come on, Giles," Buffy ordered gently, as she draped his arm over her shoulder and began to help him out of the mansion and to the hospital, Xander accompanying them in a dark, contemplative silence.

* * *

><p>They walked through the doors of the emergency room and then took seats to wait their turn. However, Buffy and Xander eventually left Giles to go visit Willow at his urging. In truth, Giles wanted to be alone.<p>

His name was called an hour or so after Buffy and Xander had left, and he got to his feet slowly before following the nurse back to an examination room. Surprisingly, the doctor was already there and waiting for him. Giles answered the man's questions stoically; not at all curious as to why the doctor did not ask him about how he had sustained his wounds.

He'd long ago accepted that no one in Sunnydale asked questions.

Giles didn't mind though. He needed to think. He had so much information to process and analyze.

His injuries were not the worst he could have sustained. Broken bones would mend, bruises would fade, cuts would seal. Emotionally, though…emotionally, Giles was a long way from healing.

Aside from the mental trauma of being tortured by The Scourge of Europe, Giles had suffered so much more when Drusilla had hypnotized him. He'd seen what he'd wanted to see. Jenny, his Jenny…such a beautiful woman she'd been. He'd loved her, really and truly loved her.

And she was dead.

Angel had killed her.

Giles sighed, but the doctor didn't even look up to question him. He simply continued his work.

The distinction between Angel and Angelus had become fuzzy to Giles. Whether it be by his own hatred or guilt or loss, he didn't know. It was just that somewhere along the line, they had become one and the same. Angel was Angelus. Angelus was Angel. They had become interchangeable.

Upon hearing that Angelus had been re-ensouled, Giles had been furious. His own need for revenge had far surpassed his relief that Angelus was locked away once more. Giles wanted to find him. He wanted to find Angel, track him down, and drive a stake through his cold heart.

For Jenny and for himself.

But Giles wouldn't follow through with his inner wishes.

No, Giles wouldn't kill Angel. There was no ultimate, wise, selfless reason as to why. It was actually rather simple and selfish. If he killed Angel, Buffy would never trust him again. It would be the epitome of betrayal in the young Slayer's eyes, and she would surely cut him out of her life completely. Giles loved her too much too much to allow that.

Some time ago he had begun to see her as a daughter rather than a student. He wouldn't have been able to give an answer as to exactly when the shift had occurred if someone had ever asked, but he knew that he had a father's love for his Slayer.

The past few months, his heart had broken for her. Buffy was so bright, so happy with Angel…and it had been obvious that Angel's world had revolved around her. Giles had let them be, against his better judgment.

Look how that had turned out.

The devastation on Buffy's face when she'd learned that Angel had lost his soul had almost been more than Giles could bear…but it had been nothing compared to the guilt that seemed to swallow her up whole. Giles knew she blamed herself, even if it wasn't her fault. It was Angel's fault if Giles had to put the blame on someone, even if he knew that Angel didn't deserve the blame either.

No one could have predicted what would happen.

Giles looked down at his hand, now in a brace that was nice and tight. The doctor left and Giles simply sat on the examination table for a few more moments as he collected his thoughts. He needed to think ahead.

Angel was back, soulful once more…yet he was in the wind as far as Giles knew. Where had he gone? Had he left? Was he coming back?

Buffy was in pain. She was hurt by Angel's departure, that much was certain. What would she do? Would she try to find him? What would they do? Would they stay together?

What was he, Giles, going to do?

Giles frowned. It was a good question, and one that he sadly did not yet know the answer to.

* * *

><p>Buffy and Xander had walked down the hall of the hospital in silence. Buffy could feel the tension in the air, and she knew that Xander was refraining from saying whatever was on his mind. Buffy was grateful for that, because she was pretty sure that she really didn't want to know or hear what her friend was thinking.<p>

Of all her friends, she knew that Xander disliked Angel the most. Some would call it hate, Buffy supposed, but she didn't like to think that Xander was capable of such strong emotion. To dislike someone was one thing, but to hate someone, to truly hate someone was another entity entirely.

At times, Buffy wondered what had led Xander to dislike Angel so much. Of course, she hadn't been blind to the fact that in the early stages of their friendship Xander had had a crush on her. Buffy had tried to ignore it for two reasons, well, three really. Reason number one was that Willow was completely crushing on Xander, and Buffy refused to come between them. Reason number two was simply that Buffy didn't see Xander that way. The third reason was even simpler, and yet more complicated...Buffy had only had eyes for Angel.

But did Xander's dislike stem from rejection and jealousy, or was he truly just trying to look out for her like he always defended? Buffy sighed softly, fearing that it was a little bit of both.

They reached Willow's door then, and Buffy turned to Xander. "I'm gonna go down to the cafeteria," she said quietly. "I should really eat something. Tell Willow I'll be back soon."

Buffy turned and left before Xander had even had time to protest.

The cafeteria was relatively empty, especially at this time of night. There were a few people: a couple playing Scrabble sipping what Buffy knew was bad coffee, a young girl who was organizing her M&Ms by color while her father talked quietly on the phone, a few others were reading and then shooting worried glances at the clock every time they turned the page. Buffy sighed, and walked to the vending machine, thinking that the little girl had the right idea about M&Ms.

Sliding her coins through the slot and punching in the correct code, Buffy watched as her candy fell with a thunk to the bottom of the machine. She reached her hand through the little slot at the bottom, grabbing her treat, and then found a table in the corner, away from everyone.

Buffy ripped the top of the package and poured some of the multi-colored candy in her hand, popping a few in her mouth immediately. Slowly, Buffy ate her candy, all the while staring at the opposite wall, thinking.

Angel.

Angel was back.

Angel was gone.

He was nowhere.

He was everywhere.

Life really sucked, Buffy decided.

The past few months had been hell. Seeing her lover's face, so beautiful and kind, become so horrifyingly evil and malicious had been almost more than she could take. His laughter once so soft and gentle and become mocking and cruel. Every single time she'd seen Angelus, she'd seen Angel. It was him who she thought of automatically. It was his face, his body. Trying to separate the two in her mind had been difficult at first, but she'd managed. At first glance, Angelus and Angel looked exactly the same. But when she'd looked harder, like Buffy had learned to do, they didn't look alike at all.

Angelus stood too straight, too cocky, too proud. His eyes glittered in malice. His smile was crooked with cruelty. Angelus looked nothing like Angel. Angel's shoulders sagged with the weight of his guilt, yet he still carried a strong presence. His eyes were warm with compassion. His smile was soft and kind. Angel looked nothing like Angelus.

How did everyone else not see that?

Buffy had not forgotten what Angelus had done, how could she? But she wasn't going to punish Angel for it. He would punish himself enough without her wrongfully adding to it.

Absently, Buffy tipped the package of M&Ms in her hand, but the chocolatey candy did not appear. Buffy frowned and looked at the clock.

Time to see Willow.

* * *

><p>"How ya doin' Wills?" Buffy asked softly as she took a seat in the chair beside her best friend's hospital bed.<p>

"Oh, you know me," Willow laughed tiredly. "I'm just dandy."

Buffy looked at Willow disapprovingly, but Willow refused to say that her head was killing her because she knew that Buffy would feel guilty even though it wasn't her fault.

Sighing, Buffy looked around the room. "Where's Oz?" she asked confused.

"Xander took him down to the cafeteria," Willow answered with a gentle smile. "Well, more like dragged. You really shouldn't underestimate Oz."

Buffy smiled, even though she was surprised she hadn't run into Oz or Xander on her way back up to Willow's room. "I guess we just missed each other then," she said before becoming serious. "I stopped Acathla," she said quietly. "I didn't have to kill Angel. Willow…I can't thank you enough."

"You mean it worked?" Willow asked, her eyes shining bright with excitement despite how tired she was. "Xander came in, but he wouldn't say anything!"

"Yeah, Wills, it worked," Buffy said softly.

Willow's heart was racing, the frantic beat from the heart monitor let Buffy know, too. "Willow, are you alright?" she asked anxiously. "Willow? What's wrong?"

"Nothing!" Willow denied, a bright smile appearing on her face that completely forwent triumph. In fact, the look on her face resembled pure, albeit slightly surprised joy. "Oh, if I could get up and do a happy dance, I would!" Willow clapped her hands. "This is great!"

"Yes," Buffy agreed slowly, trying to work out exactly why Willow was so excited. "Angel has a soul…"

"Yeah, he does," Willow agreed, nodding her head, but immediately wincing at the action. "Ugh, remind me no nodding in the next few days…I'm still a little muddled in the noggin'."

"Got it. No nodding," Buffy said gently. "Thank you so much Willow," she repeated, doubting she'd ever be able to say it enough. "I mean…after everything that Angelus did…" Buffy paused, fighting back tears as flashes of memory of the past few months flitted through her brain. "You still did the spell…Angel—I know I would have been able to kill him. But, Will, it would have killed _me_ to do it. I-I don't know what I would have done," Buffy admitted quietly as silent tears rolled down her cheeks.

Willow was still flying high on her witchy broom of success. There was one thing that Buffy didn't know. "Well, I know that you and Angel are soulmates. You've really got the fairytale romance goin' on, and that would make me a bad witch if I didn't do something to fix it."

"But you're not a bad witch," Buffy shook her head. "You never could be."

"Thanks," Willow smiled. "Oh, and you should know that I didn't do the spell that the gypsies originally cursed him with," she said quickly.

"What?" Buffy exclaimed, her eyes wide. "Willow? Is he really Angel? Was it all a trick, is he just playing me? I could have sworn that it was him—."

"Whoa, calm down Buff," Xander said as he strolled in, Oz right behind him, who immediately went to Willow's left side and took her hand. "Look who I brought," Xander said, moving aside so that they could see a very tired Giles.

The Watcher smiled at Willow. "I'm glad to see you're alright."

"You too," Willow returned the smile, but Buffy couldn't stand the suspense any longer. What was Willow talking about?

"Willow, what do you mean you didn't do the original spell?" Buffy asked quickly, causing everyone's ears to perk up.

"What?" Giles asked sharply. "Willow, what did you do?"

"I didn't do all the work!" Willow immediately defended. "When I found the disc that had Ms. Calendar's spell on it, I really looked it over, ya know? And well, she had a lot of notes at the bottom…she'd felt so guilty," Willow admitted quietly. She hesitantly looked up at Giles, whose eyes were just a little misty. "S-she wanted to try and make it right. She thought that what her clan had done to Angel was wrong and unfair to him…"

"I don't see how," Xander cut in angrily. "He killed people! Shouldn't he suffer for it?"

"No!" Buffy and Willow both shouted at the same time, causing Xander to rock back on his heels.

"The soul didn't do anything, Xander," Willow argued. "The demon did those things. Angelus. Not the soul—Angel is innocent!"

"Willow, what did you do?" Giles asked seriously.

"Well…Ms. Calendar had been trying to make it right," Willow repeated before looking at Buffy. "She wanted you to be able to be together…she was trying to work out a way to make his soul permanent."

Buffy's breath caught in her throat as her brain quickly processed Willow's words. It couldn't be…could it? Was it possible that Angel's soul was permanent? Was Angelus locked away for good? Buffy couldn't even begin to think about all the things that this could mean. Angel would never have to fear himself again. Buffy could relax, knowing that Angelus was gone. They could be together—in every way. No one would ever have to worry about them getting too close again and have a repeat of the past few months.

"Willow," Giles said slowly as he tried to force himself not to jump to conclusions. "Are you saying that you…you made Angel's soul permanent?"

Willow looked like she was about to nod, and Buffy quickly interfered. "Hey, no nodding!"

"Oh, right," Willow stopped herself not a moment too soon. "Thanks," she smiled before looking at Giles. "Yes," she said firmly. "I looked over Ms. Calendar's notes and figured it out."

"So that was the reason for the whole, 'not-speaking-English-possession-thing'?" Xander asked, completely blown away by the news.

"Yep," Willow replied.

"Willow," Giles said seriously, a slight reprimand in his tone. "This was completely irresponsible of you. Changing a spell as old and as specific as a Soul Restoration Spell is no simple thing. Something could have gone wrong, and consequences we couldn't even fathom may become of this act, even though it was with all the right intentions." Willow looked down, chastened.

"At the very least, you should have shown the spell to me," Giles said seriously.

"I didn't know if you'd let me do it," Willow said quietly, but then added firmly. "And if you'd said no, I still would have done it."

Giles pursed his lips. Willow was talented in the magical arts, but Giles was surprised she had managed to pull off something as powerful as anchoring Angel's soul. If Giles were one to believe in the thought, he would have said it was fate.

"We can't be sure that it worked," Giles shook his head, still trying to assess all the angles.

"It did," Buffy said and everyone looked at her, their faces spanning from Xander's disgust to Giles' shock to Willow's goofy smile. "Not that way!" Buffy immediately amended, blushing furiously.

"Well, that's a relief," Xander muttered. "I really didn't want you to test that theory."

"Hey, my spell worked!" Willow said defensively. "Buffy said so."

"Angel has a soul," Buffy said softly. "He's back."

"Oh, well then where is he?" Xander wondered aloud, remembering how Buffy had already dodged the question once when they were at the mansion. "Personally, I'd be happy if he just packed up shop and left. Good riddance I say. Sunnydale has enough evil without Dead Boy walking around."

"Shut up, Xander!" Buffy snapped angrily.

"Oh, please, come on, Buffy!" Xander yelled frustrated. "He killed Jenny! He killed who knows who else! He broke my arm, and put Willow, _your best friend_, in the hospital. He tortured Giles! You should have just staked him when you had the chance!"

"Xander!" Willow cried horrified at the tears that had pooled in Buffy's eyes at Xander's harsh words. "How can you say that? I did this for both of them, for everyone! Buffy and Angel deserve to be together! They make each other happy, and don't you want that? Don't you want Buffy to be happy?"

"Well I guess that now Angel can get the big happy, it doesn't matter," Xander snapped coldly, causing Buffy to gasp as if she'd been punched in the gut. "You can go have sex with Dead Boy without ending the world. Good for you," he finished before storming out of the room.

A sob escaped Buffy as she stared at the doorway where Xander had just left. How could he say such things? How could he think so little of her? Is that what he thought of her? Is that what he'd been thinking of earlier? Did he just think she was a slut?

His words had cut her like a knife. Tears slid down her cheeks as Buffy felt the sharp sting of betrayal skewer her heart. If anyone else had said such words, she would have been able to shrug them off. But coming from Xander, one of her closest friends…there was no immediate bounce back. Xander had been her friend since the beginning, and Buffy had always admired him for his loyalty. It was something that couldn't be taught, it was just an innate motivation. How could Xander think this way of her? Why did he hate Angel so much? Was he really just trying to make her see what was best for her? The thought at any other time would have caused her blood to boil, but she was far too shocked at the moment to act on the emotion.

A sudden thought occurred to her. Was this what everyone else thought about her and Angel? Buffy knew that Willow felt different, but right now, she was the only one that Buffy knew of for sure. What did Giles think? Surely, Giles hated Angel. Even if it hadn't been Angel who had tortured him, Angelus had worn his face.

Giles probably hated her too. After all, she'd had the chance to kill Angelus more than once, but she'd always let him go. Every time she'd had the chance to kill him, she'd ignored it, and every night as she'd lay in bed the decision would haunt her. How many people died because she hadn't been strong enough? What kind of person did letting him live make her? Angleus had known that she couldn't kill him, and that had only made things worse.

This was all her fault.

Everyone had every right to hate her.

"I'm sorry," Buffy apologized, choking on a sob. "I-I didn't know…if I had I would have n-never…"

"Buffy, we know," Giles interrupted gently. "Xander's just being a prat."

Giles' words brought a smile to Buffy's face. "Oh, look at Giles with the British slang. Xander's being a prat alright," Buffy's smile quickly faded, unable to keep the expression for long as she looked up at Giles.

She took in the brace on his hand, the bandage over the cut above his eye, the bruises. "I wouldn't blame you if you felt the same way, Giles," Buffy said softly. "I may not have known what would happen but…it's still my fault…"

"No, it's not your fault," Giles argued, trying to figure out how to comfort his Slayer.

Giles recalled his contemplations from earlier. He hated Angel and he hated Angelus. The two had become one and the same, even though he knew in his mind that they were completely different individuals. One loved and the other hated. It was that simple a distinction between the two.

But Giles knew it would be a long time before he would be able to accept that. Because at the moment, his heart still ached from the loss of his love. He needed someone to blame in his grief, and since Angelus was gone…Angel would have to do.

However, Giles couldn't tell Buffy this. Although, he could tell her that she was not what Xander had said.

"Buffy, you are by no means what Xander alluded to," Giles said firmly. "You're one of the best people on this earth, and you shouldn't let him make you think any different. You are not responsible for Angel losing his soul, and neither is Angel for that matter."

"Where _is_ Angel?" Oz asked curiously. "I thought he'd be with you."

Buffy's gaze immediately dropped to her lap. "H-he left."

"What?" Willow questioned wide-eyed. "That's not good. Did he _leave_ leave? Or did he just 'take a walk' leave?"

"I-I don't know," Buffy whispered, her eyes growing frantic at Willow's questions. Why hadn't she thought of this earlier? It was exactly the thing Angel would do.

Buffy looked from Giles to Oz to Willow, as if they could give her answers. "What if he _did_ leave, as in the 'for good, never coming back' kind? What if he's already left? What if—," Buffy began, but she quickly shook her head as she rose from her chair. "Never mind, I gotta go. I've got to find him!" she said panicking at the thought that Angel might leave without even saying goodbye, or even worse…not knowing that his soul was anchored.

* * *

><p><strong>Run, Buffy! Run!<strong>

**Yes, the angst continues! It really is non stop for the first eight chapters especially, but then it slows down...slightly...**

**And how about the Scoobies reactions? Willow, gah, I love the S2 Willow. So loyal she be! And sneaky...**

**Xander, well, Xander's gonna be Xander and be a real jerk for a while.**

**Giles...poor Giles, he's just had a tough time, hasn't he?**

**Oz is just going to go with Willow. Plus, Oz knows what it's like to have an animal inside trying to get out.**

**Sooooooooooooooooo...you like?**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews, guys! You are all so ridiculously amazing, and I love you so much for it! Okay, this chapter was so much FUN to write. It's the first big confrontation between Buffy and Angel, and I. Am. So. Excited. !**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Me: (bounces up and down and does very awkward happy dance) Woo! Yay! I'm so excited, you guys!**

_**Buffy: (frowns) Why?**_

**Me: (grins) Because you and Angel get in a fight! **

_**Angel: (frowns) But...**_

**Me: Uh huh, no arguing Hot Stuff. You will not win.**

_**Buffy: Angel...she's giving me a real creepy vibe**_

_**Angel: (takes Buffy's hand and starts to back away)...Yeah, definitely creepy...she's too happy...**_

**Me: (frowns) Guys! Come back here! You have a fight!**

***Angel and Buffy run***

**Me: (hangs head and sighes)**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter Three<p>

Buffy raced through the hospital halls and out of habit went to the elevator. She stood there for all of two seconds before darting to her left and yanking open the door to the stairs. Overwhelming panic gripped her heart as she descended the stairs far faster than was safe, but she didn't care.

She had to find Angel.

The past months without him had torn her heart to pieces. Seeing his beautiful face wearing an evil, sadistic smirk, seeing his warm, chocolate brown eyes gleam violently. Hearing his low, soothing voice taunt her, hearing him laugh manically. It had been physically painful.

His words had hurt her the most. She knew it wasn't Angel saying those things. Angel would _never_ say such things. Such cruel words could never have come from his mouth.

But they'd hurt nonetheless.

Not even giving a thought to the stitch in her side, Buffy descended the last of the stairs and threw open the door, running out into the hallway and then out the front doors of the hospital, not giving a damn at the looks she was getting. It was a freakin' hospital. They shouldn't be surprised by someone in a hurry.

However, once she was outside, the cool night air hitting her face, she skidded to a halt. She caught her breath as she was faced with a decision.

Where did she look?

Buffy's mind automatically thought of the places he could be. She nixed the Bronze, because he really didn't like it there anyway. She doubted he was in a graveyard…though he might be skulking around, staking any vampire that dared to even be near him—that idea held some promise, but Buffy filed the thought away for later.

She thought of his apartment and the mansion. She doubted he'd go to the latter…way too many bad memories. Buffy snorted. Going on that train of thought, his apartment wouldn't be that much better.

Buffy sighed. Angel was sentimental, a fact that probably only she knew, or at least knew the depth of. Where would he go? The answer caused her to mentally slap herself.

Sprinting off to the right, Buffy headed towards the alley where they'd first met.

* * *

><p>Angel stared broodingly at the pavement in front of him as he rounded the corner to the alley where he and Buffy had first met—officially at least.<p>

_Is there a problem, ma'am?_

_Yeah, there's a problem. Why are you following me?_

_I know what you're thinking. Don't worry, I don't bite._

Angel sighed and looked around. He really didn't know why he'd come here.

After leaving Buffy at the mansion, he'd gone back to his apartment, intending to pack up his stuff and leave. However, the moment he'd walked into the place, all thoughts of leaving had fled his mind.

The apartment still smelled of him and Buffy, and Angel couldn't help but notice how well their scents mixed together. Granted, it was faint, neither of them having been there in months (Angelus had refused to live in such standards). However, their scent had still been present in the air. The bed was still unmade, Buffy's scent and that of their love still clung to the sheets.

The apartment was exactly has they had left it.

Angel couldn't help the route his mind took when he'd seen the bed and smelled their scents. He vividly remembered that night, every single detail. It had been the absolute best night of his life. He'd been happy, truly happy, and the feeling had been exquisite.

She'd fallen asleep on his chest, and he'd held her until he couldn't keep his eyes open any longer.

Then, he'd woken up to a searing pain in his chest.

Angel shook his head and blocked the thoughts that immediately sprung to his mind. He didn't want to think about Angelus and what all he had done, what all he'd said…particularly to Buffy.

Faint footsteps echoed across the pavement, prompting Angel to turn and face the new arrival.

"Buffy."

"Angel," Buffy said, slightly breathless due to her sprint to find him. "Thought I might find you here."

"Yeah, well," Angel shrugged. "I was just leaving."

"You seem to be doing that a lot lately," Buffy said blithely, crossing her arms over her chest. "You know, if I didn't know you better I'd say you were a coward."

Angel's eyes flashed yellow, and Buffy knew she'd hit a nerve, but she didn't care.

"What do you want Buffy?" Angel asked flatly.

Buffy smiled. "I just wanna talk."

"We're talking."

"Yep," Buffy agreed. "And we're gonna talk just a little bit more about lots of bad things."

Angel didn't answer immediately. The urge to escape her flared again, and Angel debated whether or not to give in to it. He knew that Buffy wanted to talk about Angelus. What else could it be? Angel _didn't_ want to talk about Angelus. He didn't even want to _think_ about how he'd hurt her, how he'd haunted her. Guilt coursed through him anew as more memories and thoughts filtered through his mind from his months as Angelus. How could Buffy still want him?

"You sure you want to do that?" Angel asked raising his eyebrows, overcoming the urge to escape her presence for a moment.

Buffy took a deep breath, before meeting his eyes determinedly. "Yes."

Angel couldn't look at her anymore, seeing the determination in her eyes caused his false bravado falter. He looked anywhere but Buffy. "Want to pick a starting point?" he asked dully. "Or do you want to just say the first thing that comes to mind?"

"Angel, look at me," Buffy demanded gently, taking a few steps towards him.

Angel looked up, but he didn't meet her eyes.

"Look at me," Buffy repeated firmly.

Angel finally looked up, and Buffy wanted to cry at the haunted pain in his eyes. She ached to hold him, to tell him that it would be alright, that she wasn't going anywhere...but she knew that it would only push him away.

"Everything that's happened since my birthday is _not_ your fault," Buffy said seriously.

"How can't it be?" Angel asked anguished. "I-I just wanted to love you and look what happened," he finished brokenly, looking away from her once again. "I was selfish. I should have stopped, I should have been able to stop…"

"You regret what we did?" Buffy asked hurt shining in her eyes.

Angel met her gaze again, his own eyes misty with tears. "I could never regret making love to you, Buffy," Angel said truthfully. "But I regret the consequences…"

"Angel, that wasn't you," Buffy whispered, pleading with him to understand. "It wasn't you."

"You don't understand," Angel shook his head, growing agitated. "You don't understand what it's like. You're gone and then one minute you're back and you have all these memories…you know that you didn't do them, but…you relive them in first person, because for that time, in that moment—it _was_ you."

"When I remember the things he did, it's just like I had done them myself," Angel whispered. "Every thought, every image, every feeling…"

"It wasn't you," Buffy repeated shaking her head.

"I'm a monster," Angel said dejectedly. "A killer."

"Damnit, Angel, it wasn't you!" Buffy marched right up to him, getting in his face as much as she could considering their height difference. "It wasn't you," Buffy repeated again, hitting him in the chest pointedly after each word.

"You're not a monster," Buffy argued. "You're not a killer either! You're just Angel, and it's all you need to be!"

"I hurt you," Angel whispered brokenly, and Buffy knew that this was truly the crux of the matter.

Her heart broke for him as the already substantial pain in his eyes grew depthless.

"You could never hurt me," Buffy shook her head, and something in Angel's eyes seemed to flash.

Gone was the sadness. Gone was the pain. In its place was anger.

"I didn't hurt you?" Angel nearly snarled as he glared at her. He was fine with anger. In fact, anger was a nice reprieve from all his self loathing and brooding and guilt. Anger was easy, simple, directionless, thoughtless.

"Tell me Buffy, when didn't I hurt you?" Angel asked harshly. "Was it the morning after we made love? Did I hurt you then? I did. You cried. I insulted something that was so beautiful it's practically sacred to me. I hurt you then."

Tears sprung into Buffy's eyes at his words, but Angel kept going relentlessly.

"What about when I killed Jenny?" he continued. "What about when I put her in Giles' bed, like she was there waiting for him? Did I hurt you then?"

"And let's not forget everyone else I killed!" Angel shouted, pain flashing in his eyes. "There are so many more that you don't know about. Every single one of them killed because you had the chance to kill me and you didn't take it."

Tears ran down Buffy's face. Seeing him angry like this, seeing the anger in his eyes, the violence of his tirade made her feel a twinge of fear that instantly made her feel guilty. She knew that Angelus was not in front of her, shouting at her. She knew it was Angel. Angelus would never show so much pain. Buffy knew that it was pain that was truly driving Angel at the moment, not anger. But still…she couldn't help the fear she felt.

Seeing her teary face, smelling her fear, something in Angel told him to stop, but he was long past having the ability to.

"Does that hurt you?" he continued flatly. "It must, knowing that if you'd just put a stake through my heart that it'd all be over. Don't you wonder how many people could have been saved if you'd just gotten it over with? Doesn't that haunt you?"

"What about everything else that you don't know about?" Angel continued, tears pooling in his eyes. "What about me sleeping with Dru? Does that hurt you? What about me torturing Giles for hours? Does that hurt you?" By now, Angel had tears sliding down his cheeks.

"How can you say that I've never hurt you?" Angel whispered as his anger abruptly left him, and Buffy's subsequent fear vanished as well. "It's all I've done."

"Y-you slept with Drusilla?" Buffy asked as betrayal stung her.

"I—I…yes," Angel admitted quietly, turning away from her and walking towards the alley wall, needing to put some space between them.

"You were him though, right?" Buffy asked, though she was practically begging. "I mean, you didn't—."

"God, no!" Angel spun around at the suggestion. "I never cheated on you. I was…him…when it happened."

"Oh," Buffy nodded, relief washing through her, nearly overwhelming. "That's...better."

"I'm sorry," Angel apologized as the tears he'd just gotten under control slid down his face. Of all the things he'd done as Angelus, sleeping with Drusilla had been the one thing that caused him the most grief. "I can understand if you hate me..."

"I don't hate you," Buffy interrupted quickly, looking scandalized at the accusation. "I love you."

Angel looked at her, torn between sheer incredulity, relief, and hope. "Why?"

"Why?" Buffy asked incredulously, a shaky laugh escaping her as she wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. "Why do I love you? Gah, for this reason right here, for one thing…no matter how annoying it is."

"What?" Angel asked confused.

"You're so…_you_," Buffy floundered for the right words. "You're selfless and compassionate. Angel you have so much love to give that it completely blows me away. The reason you feel so much guilt over things that you yourself have never done is because of your ability to _care_. You have such a huge big heart, Angel. You're beautiful inside and out, and right now, I don't care if you don't see it that way. All I care about is you. All I want is you."

Angel stood there completely stunned for a moment. Her words triggered a memory.

_So you don't think about the future?_

_No._

_Never?_

_No._

_You really don't care what happens a year from now? Five years from now?_

_Angel, when I look into the future, all I see is you…all I want is you._

"I know the feeling," Angel whispered, looking into Buffy's eyes with all the love he possessed.

Buffy started towards him, and Angel quickly closed the distance between them. His arms were around her waist, and then she was pulled flush against him. Their lips met and it was like a fire started, consuming them both. Passion flowed hot through their veins as their lips moved with each other with a familiarity that other couples spent years trying to reach.

So lost in the kiss Angel's hands slipped underneath Buffy's shirt to rest on her hips, lifting her up as Buffy wrapped her legs around his waist. Buffy felt her back hit the alley wall as she let her tongue trail along his bottom lip; begging for entry. Angel instantly complied, deepening the kiss, muffling Buffy's appreciative moan.

Buffy trailed her hands down Angel's back, causing him to shiver. Gasping for air, Buffy broke away to catch her breath. Not for the first time, she was grateful for Angel's lack of need for oxygen. His lips never strayed from her skin.

He trailed soft, wet kisses down her neck, sucking at the point where her neck and shoulder joined as his hands began to move towards the waistband of her jeans. Idly, he wondered what the chance of anyone walking down this alley was in the next twenty minutes.

The thought stopped Angel cold. _What the hell was he doing?_

Feeling Angel's tension, Buffy looked at him confused. "Angel? What's wrong?"

"This."

"This is wrong?" Buffy asked, hurt adding to her confusion.

"Buffy, I was just about to—," Angel shook his head. He'd been thinking about doing _many_ things. He'd also been thinking that it would be easier if she were wearing a skirt. "We can't do this! Look at us, ten minutes together and we're halfway to having sex!"

Buffy unwrapped her legs from his waist, and dropped down to the ground. "Oh, yeah…" Buffy said trailed off. "I've got to tell you something."

"Is this something important?" Angel asked frustrated that Buffy wasn't at all worried about the fact he had almost taken her against the wall.

"Well, it's why I had to come find you before you skipped town without saying goodbye," Buffy explained, before adding. "Which, by the way, would have _really_ annoyed me."

"Buffy, what is it?" Angel asked exasperatedly.

"You're so impatient sometimes. Is that a vampire thing?" she asked.

"How is it that whenever we fight you bring up the vampire thing?"

Buffy shrugged.

"What do you have go tell me?" Angel repeated.

Suddenly, Buffy was nervous and found her toes very interesting. "Well, um, you see…Willow did something."

"Willow did something," Angel repeated. "And this is an important something?"

"I think it is."

"Okay…what is it?"

"Willow anchored your soul…her spell was the permanent version," Buffy answered softly, finding the courage to gaze up into his eyes.

Angel just stared at her.

Admittedly, a part of him was jumping up and down like a kid on Christmas morning. Joyous relief threatened to overwhelm him, and Angel had to put a steadying hand against the wall to make sure he stayed on his feet.

His soul was anchored?

"You mean—Angelus—he's…" Angel trailed off, not wanting to finish the thought, afraid she'd deny it.

"Is completely null and void," Buffy said with a small smile. "Locked up nice and tight."

"Why?"

"Why?" Buffy repeated confused. This was not a response she'd anticipated.

"Why did Willow do it?"

"Because she wants us to be together, she wants us to be happy. Ms. Calendar had been working on it, and Willow figured it out," Buffy answered hesitatingly.

"After all of this?" Angel asked dubiously.

This was all too much right now. He was still reeling from almost making love to Buffy in an alley. Granted, they were in the alley where they'd first met, but still…it was an alley. And now Buffy was telling him that his soul was permanent. It was too much. Once again, he felt the need to escape.

"We talked about this, Angel," Buffy shook her head, raising her voice a little. "Angelus isn't—."

"I don't deserve this," Angel interrupted quickly, beginning to back away. "I don't deserve any of this."

And with that, Angel turned and escaped, leaving Buffy alone once again.

* * *

><p><strong>Hehehe...this was fun, right? :D<strong>

**All this angst is making me want to watch Loony Tunes or something (lol). However, one great thing about angst is that I get to have Buffy and Angel want to jump each other's bones! Things were so hot between them before her birthday, but then Angelus came and stole the thunder. Even when Angel was Angelus there was still a wonderful sexual tension between them, so yeah...Buffy and Angel are going to be just _little_ passionate (evil grin)...**

**Lots and lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Hey, guys! Wanna guess what this chapter involves? Angst? Yes, yes it does. I know, it's starting to wear on me too. I keep having to go back a reread it to edit and stuff. I swear that it lightens up in a few chapters! If you can make it to chapter 8 then you're golden! :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy.)**

**Me: Okay, are we ready?**

_**Buffy: Am I getting into a fight again?**_

**Me: (whistles) Maybe.**

_**Buffy: Then I refuse. This is bogus! I don't fight with this many people in one day!**_

**Me: (scoffs) Yeah, hun, ya do. By the by, where's Angel? Angel?**

_**Angel:...**_

**Me and Buffy: Grrrrrrrrr...he's so broody!**

_**Joyce: What is this? Who are you?**_

**Me: Ah, this is my disclaimer. And the question you want to ask is who are _you_?**

_**Buffy: Alice in Wonderland? Seriously?**_

**Me: (shrugs) I like talking Bunnies.**

_**Anya: (screams) Eeep!**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter Four<p>

He'd left her.

Again.

He'd left her for the second time in less than twenty-four hours.

Buffy wiped away her tears roughly with the back of her hand. It was like she was crying constantly, and she hated that. Why did Angel have to be such a self deprecating, selfless, noble, _idiot?_

White hot anger lit her veins, and if Buffy weren't so tired she would have probably done something about it. However, it had been a long day even by her standards. She'd saved the world from her vampire honey evil alter ego. Then she'd fought twice with Angel. She'd fought with Xander at the hospital.

She was tired of fighting.

Absently, Buffy began wondering in the direction towards her house, thinking of everything that had happened today, trying to sort out how she felt about it all.

Fighting Angelus had been the hardest thing she'd ever had to do. Accepting the fact that she would have to kill him, subsequently extinguishing all chances of ever seeing her Angel again had been even harder.

And then he'd gotten his soul back.

Seeing his eyes, so filled with emotion had caused her heart to soar. The depth of his chocolate brown eyes was limitless once again, and Buffy knew it was one of the most beautiful things in her world. She loved his eyes.

She'd been so happy. She'd thought that everything would work out. Angel was back, and he still loved her. She still loved him. That meant that all was good in the world…oh, how wrong she'd been.

Buffy wasn't surprised at Angel's attitude. Not at all. It was so totally and completely Angel. All the guilt, all the pain, all the sadness, all the regret, all the self loathing—it hadn't surprised Buffy in the slightest.

Angel simply loved. His heart was filled with a compassion that Buffy didn't know if anyone else possessed. He cared. For everyone. He was Buffy's hero, whether he knew it or not.

Buffy thought about the things he'd said in the alley. The pain he felt cut her to the core, and it was so visceral that Buffy was surprised she hadn't bled, even if she knew it were impossible to literally be wounded by words. His voice had been anguished one moment and then angry the next, bitterly so.

It was a side of Angel that Buffy had never seen. She knew him as quiet and calm. He had a dry, sarcastic sense of humor that never failed to make her laugh. He was smart, ridiculously so. She'd seen him laugh and she'd seen him cry. She'd seen him jealous too, but she'd never truly seen him angry.

It had been an eye-opening experience.

She thought of all the things he had revealed. Sadly, it hadn't surprised her when he'd told her that there were many more victims that she didn't know about. Buffy had known that Angelus would kill as many as he could.

The depth of his pain and remorse had caused her heart to throb painfully. She'd wanted to comfort him so badly, but she'd known he didn't want it. He felt as if he deserved nothing. He thought he didn't deserve love or happiness. He thought he deserved to suffer, and he was more than willing to.

Angel had been right. He had hurt her, though she would never tell him that. It wasn't even him that had hurt her. It had been Angelus. She knew that…but the fact that she'd always seen Angel when she'd looked at him hadn't helped.

But Buffy knew—Buffy knew that Angel would never purposefully hurt her. She trusted him with her life. She always would. There was no one she trusted more on this Earth than Angel.

However, the one thing that bothered her more than anything was that Angelus had slept with Drusilla. Honestly, the idea of him sleeping with anyone had never occurred to her. She knew now that she'd been stupid to think that Angelus would be celibate for months…and Buffy also knew of Drusilla's history. The fact that Angelus had slept with her didn't surprise her.

But it did hurt her.

Buffy knew that Angel hadn't slept with Dru. She knew it. But…it'd still been his body, and Buffy still claimed it for her eyes only. Buffy didn't know if she was more jealous or hurt with the knowledge of what Angelus had done.

But she didn't blame Angel.

After all of this, after everything that had happened, Buffy still loved Angel with all her soul. She knew that Angel loved her too and right now that was all that mattered.

It was also all that was going to get her through the days to come.

Buffy was just about to open the door to her house when she realized that she wasn't welcome. The last time she'd been in the house flashed through her mind.

_I told you. I'm a Vampire Slayer._

_Well, I just don't accept that._

_I'm not crazy! What I need is for you to chill. I have to go!_

_No. I am not letting you out of this house!_

_You can't stop me._

_You walk out of this house; don't even think about coming back!_

Buffy's immediate thought was to go to Angel, but she realized that she had no idea where he was. Still, Buffy considered simply going to his apartment whether he was there or not. If anything, she could feel his comforting presence in spirit.

Deciding that this was what she was going to do, Buffy turned away from the door and hopped down the porch steps.

"Buffy?"

Buffy turned around to see her mother hurrying towards her, a dishtowel in her hand that she seemed to have forgotten about. Buffy didn't even get a chance to respond before her mother's arms were around her in a tight hug.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Buffy! I didn't mean it," Joyce shook her head emphatically. "I was just—surprised, and well, shocked is really the better word. Right now, I think I'm moving on into denial honestly, but I'm…I'm just glad you came back."

"I am too," Buffy replied truthfully. "Um, let's go inside?"

"Oh, yes," Joyce nodded, looking very scatter-brained, but managing to hold it together. "Yes, that's a good idea. We should do that."

Buffy entered the house right behind her mother, and they both immediately went to the kitchen. It had always been the place where they talked things out, but right now Buffy didn't know if she wanted to talk. Right now, the only thing she was sure of was that she wanted to go to sleep.

Her mother had other plans.

"We need to sit down and talk about this," Joyce said firmly, though she looked like she was making this up as she went. "I need to know everything Buffy. I need to know the truth."

Buffy sighed and sat down heavily at the table, staring at the wood for a moment. Where did she even begin? The beginning when Merrick met her outside Hemry? When she'd first come to Sunnydale? Did she tell her mom about Giles? Her friends and how they helped her…Angel? How much did her mother really want to know? How much could she _handle_ knowing?

"I'm a Vampire Slayer," Buffy said, figuring that this was a good a place to start as any.

"Yes, I think we've established that," Joyce said somewhat frustrated at being told something she already knew, however recent the discovery was. "So…what do you do, exactly?"

"Slay vampires," Buffy answered immediately. "And other evil nasties along the way."

"And is it just you?" Joyce asked. "Are their others? You said something about Kendra?"

"There's only one Slayer…or at least there's supposed to be only one," Buffy amended. "A new Slayer is called when the previous Slayer dies."

"But that would mean that," Joyce shook her head disbelievingly. "That would mean that…"

"I died," Buffy finished for her mother, and Joyce blanched at the words. "It was only for a few minutes. Last year when I faced the Master, really ugly guy…he, um, drowned me. But Xander did CPR and here I am."

"Yes, here you are," Joyce said softly, the knowledge that she'd almost lost her daughter permanently rattling her to the core. "And I'm glad."

"Me too," Buffy smiled slightly. "Kendra though…she died."

"Yes," Joyce nodded. "The police thought that you'd killed her."

"But I didn't."

"I know that," Joyce said looking sheepish. For a few minutes she'd actually considered the idea that Buffy was guilty of the crime. What kind of mother did that make her? "So…is there another Slayer, now?"

Buffy shrugged. "I guess so."

"Well," Joyce began, thinking quickly. "Maybe she could, um, take over? You wouldn't have to be the Slayer anymore."

"Mom, I can't quit!" Buffy shook her head vehemently. "This is my _job_. It's what I do."

"Yes, but you wouldn't have to," Joyce said, the plan already seeming a reality in her mind. "You could be a normal girl."

"I'll never be normal!" Buffy exclaimed. "If I quit, what good would I be? I'd just be a girl with super strength and quick reflexes with a few ninja moves. What good would I be doing if I didn't use them? I have the ability to do something good with my life, Mom. Sure, I really hate it sometimes. I really hate that it ruins my social life. I really hate how it interferes with school. It's annoying and frustrating sometimes, but it gives me a _purpose_," Buffy said, pleading with her eyes for her mother to understand. "I need a purpose, Mom."

"But—," Joyce began, however Buffy was shaking her head.

"No, 'buts' Mom," Buffy cut in. "This is just how it is."

"What about your friends?" Joyce asked. "Do they know what you are?"

"Yes," Buffy answered honestly. "Willow and Xander were the first to know. Cordy and Oz kinda found out by accident."

"Does anyone else know?" Joyce asked, and Buffy hesitated. "Buffy?"

"Giles." Buffy looked down at her hands and noted that she needed to repaint her nails. Maybe purple this time.

"Mr. Giles?" Joyce questioned confused. "The librarian at your school?"

Buffy nodded. "Giles…he's my Watcher."

"A Watcher?"

Buffy looked down at her hands again. "Yeah, every Slayer gets a Watcher. Giles—he's like my Yoda. You know, training me and teaching me and stuff…"

"He's the reason you're like this?" Joyce asked, suddenly angry. "He's the reason you think that you can't quit?"

"No!" Buffy argued. "No, Mom! Giles just helps me, okay? He's—he's practically family to me, okay? Sure, he helps me understand the things that I have to do, and he gives some great pep talks sometimes, but more than anything he's someone that I trust completely."

"He's had an influence on you," Joyce shook her head. "He's a part of the reason why you are what you are."

"Giles has nothing to do with _why_ I'm a Slayer, Mom," Buffy replied heatedly. "I'm a Slayer because that was just how the chips fell. I had no choice in the matter."

Buffy sighed. "Giles does have an influence on me," she conceded. "Remember the whole Yoda metaphor? But that doesn't mean that he's made me what I am and that he's the sole reason for what I do."

"What about Angel?" Joyce asked suddenly, causing Buffy to immediately tense and grow silent.

"What about him?"

"You said he'd changed, and then you and Spike seemed to be plotting to kill him," Joyce said slowly. "He's a vampire."

"Yeah." Buffy looked down at her hands.

"You had sex with a vampire," Joyce said quickly. "My daughter had sex with a vampire," she said to herself, before looking up at Buffy. "Isn't that against Slayer rules or something?"

"Probably," Buffy said dryly before looking at her Mom seriously. "Okay, Mom, this is Angel in a nutshell, okay?" Joyce nodded, and Buffy took a deep breath before taking the plunge. "And no interruptions, okay?" she added as an afterthought.

"Okay," Joyce agreed.

Buffy looked at her mother for a moment before giving her a brief summary of Angel. "Angel was born in Ireland practically two and a half centuries ago. He was changed by a vampire named Darla when he was twenty-six, and then he went on to become the most feared vampire in history. He was nicknamed the Scourge of Europe and did all sorts of bad for about a century and a half. When he killed a gyspy girl, the clan retaliated and cursed him with a soul. Ever since he's been plagued with the guilt of what he'd done when he was soulless."

Joyce looked like she was about to interrupted, but Buffy glared at her, and she nodded in acquiescence.

"He came to America around the turn of the century and has been here ever since. He moped around for a while, and then came here...I met him my first night in Sunnydale." Joyce noticed Buffy's softer tone, but didn't comment. "In the beginning, Angel helped me from the sidelines. At first, I didn't even know he was a vampire. But that's a long story, and this is supposed to be a short one. Basically, Angel and I dated for a year…but I was in love with him from the moment we first met."

"Then why would you want to kill him?" Joyce asked confused.

Buffy fought back tears, refusing to cry any more today. "The gypsies that cursed him with a soul were cruel. There was a part in the spell that said if he ever had one moment of pure happiness he'd lose his soul. So when I—when we…" Buffy trailed off and shook her head trying to push through. "He lost his soul the night we made love, and he was his old, evil self again. He tried to end the world, but Willow managed to re-ensoul him and I was able to stop Acathla."

"So Angel's good again?" Joyce asked, and Buffy nodded, a slight smile pulling at her lips. "And you still love him?" she pursued.

"Always," Buffy answered quietly.

"Are you still going to see him?" Joyce continued on, and Buffy could see the tell-tale line of disapproval on her mother's brow.

"Yes," Buffy said firmly, readying herself for a fight.

"I don't think that's a good idea, Buffy."

"I don't care."

"Excuse me?" Joyce asked, her eyes narrowing dangerously. "You don't care?"

"No, I don't," Buffy shook her head. "I love Angel and I'm not going to stop seeing him."

"Even if he will lose his soul again?" Joyce asked. "You're willing to risk the world for—."

"Willow anchored his soul, Mom!" Buffy interrupted, not wanting her mother to finish that sentence. "We won't ever have to worry about Angelus again."

"And what does Angel think?" Joyce asked. "Does he still love you?"

"Of course!"

"Does he still want to be with you?" Joyce plowed on.

Buffy paused. "We're working through it," she finally said, deciding that that was the best answer she could give.

"Buffy," Joyce said slowly. "I think you really need to think about this."

"I have," Buffy said firmly. "All I want is Angel."

"That's just not rational, Buffy!" Joyce argued, rising from her chair to pace. "He's a vampire! Obviously, he will not age and you will. Are you willing to grow old and watch as he stays the same? I'm just going out on a limb here, and say that vampires can't have children. Don't you want a family? What can he give you?"

"Love," Buffy said simply, her voice quiet, but steady. "And that's all I need."

"You'll change your mind," Joyce argued. "You'll want more."

"I don't need more," Buffy shook her head, standing up from the table too. "And as far as the growing old thing, Slayer's don't really have a high life expectancy, so we're good there."

"Buffy!" Joyce looked scandailized. "Don't say that!"

"What? It's the truth," Buffy shrugged. "And if you want to look at an upside to being with Angel, he's probably going to keep me alive a lot longer. He's pretty good in a fight, but hey, I might be biased."

"Don't you use that tone with me, young lady!" Joyce said angrily. "You'll listen to me!"

"No," Buffy shook her head, growing agitated. "No, I won't!"

"Angel is no good for you!"

"He's the _only_ good for me! He's all I'll ever want and all I'll ever need!" Buffy argued passionately, begging her mother to understand.

"You're wrong," Joyce shook her head. "You can't possibly know you're future!"

"You're right, Mom, I don't," Buffy agreed. "But I know that Angel will be in it."

With that, Buffy left the kitchen, grabbing her coat off the staircase she headed towards the front door.

"Where are you going?" Joyce demanded.

"I'm going to go beat the crap out of someone!" Buffy replied grabbing the stake from her pocket and then slamming the door shut behind her.

* * *

><p><strong>Ah, mother-daughter fights...a high school must have...<strong>

**Well, I wonder who Buffy is going to run into while she's letting off some steam? (grins and winks)**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: You. Guys. Are. Amazing. I know, I know, I tell you all the time, but, well...I really just can't thank you guys enough. You are so, so, so wonderful and I appreicate every review I get! Thank you SO much AGAIN!**

**Okay, school is a whole heck of a lot busier than I thought it would be. I have tons of work in AP Bio to do. Our current unit of study is botany. F. My. Life. It's scary how much you can know about a single leaf...and I have to learn about it all (slams head on desk). Even though I'm more than halfway through my leaf collection (only 33 more to go), I still got a term paper that I probably need to work on now so I don't have to worry about it later. Add on top of that a research paper for English that will be due before the term paper for Bio. Let's not forget AP Calculus and the fact that it's AP Calculus...and then I have AP Psych just for fun. What was I thinking when I made my schedule last year? What? **

**So...sorry about that little rant, but here's the point to said rant. I love you guys, I really do. I love to tell you how much I love you. Usually, I respond to reviews. All my reviews. It's never been troublesome, and I've always enjoyed it. I just don't know how much extra time I'll have at the moment. So if I don't reply back to you, I'm probably staring at a leaf, willing it to tell me what tree it came from.**

**On a much brighter, much happier note...guess what I did over the weekend? Any takers? Yes? No? **

**Okay, I'll assume at least one of you were right, and say YES! Yes, I DID write out the outline to the sequel of AISHB this weekend! Oh yeah, go me, go me, go me! It took _forever_. Lots and lots of thinking and babies and dark witches and vengeful demon hunters and weddings and gah, it just took some brain power! But alas, I emerged victorious! Bahahahahahahaha! **

**I am soooooo excited to start working on the sequel. This story's title will be "Same Song, Different Verse." I practically threw out all of Season 6, like I thought I would. No Warren and loonies. They were a pathetic, miserable excuse for evil. The vast, vast, vast majority of the episode rewrites will be Angel episodes, as that storyline just gives me tons to work with. I think I only plan to rewrite 6 episodes total of Buffy. I also plan to write two of my own original episodes! One for Buffy, and one for Angel. Subsequently, they are both the season finales! Woo hoo!**

**Okay...so, now that I've completely diverted attention away from _this_ story, let's see if I can wrangle you back in with some wonderful angst.**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Me: Okay, guys, ready for another chapter?**

_**Buffy: What's going to happen to me this time?**_

**Me: (looks innocent) I swear it's not fatal.**

_**Angel: (growls) You hurt her, and I'll kill you.**_

**Me: (smiles fondly) There's my protective Angel I know and worship! Good to have you back!**

_**Buffy: Seriously, what did you do to me?**_

**Me: (looks wide-eyed) Vamp!**

_**Buffy and Angel: (spin around, stakes raised) Where?**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 5<p>

Buffy stomped through the graveyard, a Slayer on a mission. How could her mom expect her to end things with Angel? How could she try and interfere with her love life? Well, Buffy really didn't have enough experience to have a love life, but she was working on it.

The night was still relatively young, well, for Buffy at least. It was around midnight, the equivalent to a vampire rush hour or five o' clock traffic. This didn't bother Buffy though. This meant that she would definitely see some action, and she was just itching to stake some vamps.

Buffy wove in between the graves easily, hardly needing to pay attention as to where she stepped. She knew the cemeteries in Sunnydale like the back of her hand. This really helped when her mind was somewhere else.

Why was everyone against her relationship with Angel? What had he done? Okay, his alter ego had terrorized them for months. She had to give them that, but what she didn't understand was how they couldn't see the difference between Angel and Angelus.

It was blaringly obvious to Buffy, and she could separate them into two groups that anyone with the intellect of a kindergartener would understand. Angel was good. Angelus was bad. It really was that simple.

How could everyone else not see that?

How could they not see how compassionate Angel was? How could they not see how much he cared? How could they not see what he was underneath the surface? Why did they all just see a vampire, who happened to be on the good side? How many times had Angel saved them? How many times had Angel saved her?

Why couldn't they just see who he really was?

He was a man. He had his problems, yes, but so does everyone else in the world. Granted, Angel's problems involved an evil alter ego and a hundred years of self-loathing because of a hundred and _fifty_ years of terror and destruction, but who was going to get that technical?

Angel was just a man, a beautiful, loving, passionate, loyal, selfless, noble man. He was also an idiot sometimes (like now), but Buffy had just accepted that it came with the territory.

The sound of a snapping twig caused Buffy to spin around just in time to plunge her stake into the vampire's chest. "Why do you vamps always follow me?" she asked as the dust settled onto the ground. "It's so cliché!"

Buffy turned back around only to see a fist en route to her face. Ducking quickly, she barely dodged the punch. Buffy spun, swinging out her leg and sweeping the vampire off his feet. He landed on his back and Buffy jumped on him, pinning him to the ground by placing her knees on his chest.

She had just raised her stake to dust him when a hand grabbed her arm and threw her back. Buffy flew into a tombstone, causing it to break into pieces due to the impact. Buffy groaned, knowing that her entire back would be bruised tomorrow.

"Come on Slayer, let's play," the new vamp challenged as Buffy picked herself up.

"Aw, come on, guys, it's two against one!" Buffy whined pitifully before growing serious. "And I've had a really...bad...day!"

Buffy punched the vampire closest to her in the face, knocking him down. However, she wasn't quick enough to block the punch from the other vampire, and her head whipped to the side with the force of the blow.

"Okay, that's not nice!" Buffy admonished before kicking him in the groin, causing the vamp to crumble to the ground and curl up in the fetal position. "And are you really wearing platform shoes?" she asked before kicking him in the face, causing him to roll over on the ground. "Because those are seriously out of style! Pick up a Cosmo, would ya?"

Suddenly, something hit Buffy on the back of the head, which sent her tumbling to the ground. Buffy blinked furiously, trying to get rid of the stars in her vision. She saw a faint shadow behind her and gripped her stake tightly.

In one fluid movement, Buffy spun up and got to her feet, staking the vamp who had thought she was still disoriented. He had just enough time to look shocked before he turned to dust.

Buffy looked around, trying to find the other vampire. "Come out, come out, wherever you are!" Buffy called in a sing-song voice. "We can do this the hard way or…well, there's really only the hard way."

Buffy caught a movement out of the corner of her eye, causing her to switch her stake to her left hand. "Hiding is really not your strong suit," Buffy taunted, knowing that he was crouched behind a rather large headstone.

Buffy purposely turned her back on him, letting him think that she didn't know where he was. She saw a flash of movement and spun around, her stake raised, ready to strike.

But this vampire was faster than she expected and he caught her arm, twisting it roughly and pinning it behind her back, causing her to drop her stake. The vamp's other arm pinned hers to her side, leaving her neck exposed to him.

Buffy's heart thumped wildly in her chest as she struggled in his grip. Unable to wiggle out of his hold, Buffy threw her head back, feeling his nose crunch due to the impact. He dropped his hold on her, and Buffy reached down to pick up her stake.

But she wasn't quick enough.

The vamp had fallen to his knees when she'd head-butted him, and her stake had been laying conveniently right in front of him.

He twirled the stake in his hand. "Now this is an odd change of events," he grinned evilly before lunging at her.

Buffy fought him off, blocking his combinations easily…at first. He had twisted her arm, and she knew something was either torn or broken as it felt like it was on fire. Each punch she threw with her left hand caused a shooting pain to zing up her arm and to her shoulder where it fizzled out into a dull ache.

Her opponent kicked her in the chest, sending her flying back. Buffy landed with a groan as her already bruised back hit the hard ground.

Buffy had had enough of this. She pushed herself to her feet before somersaulting into the air with her stake raised, ready to strike. However, before she could get both feet on the ground, the vampire grabbed her arm and spun her around.

Pain.

Buffy looked down and gasped in surprise and horror as she stared at her own stake protruding from her abdomen. She was frozen for a moment in both pain and shock. Had this seriously just happened?

Buffy gripped the shaft of the stake and pulled, gasping as the bloody stake left her body. Her sweater was already wet, soaking up the blood was the pouring from the wound.

Her baser instincts kicked in. Fight or flight?

For the first time in her life, Buffy chose flight.

Buffy forced her legs to work, suddenly feeling the events of the day. After all, it had only been seven hours since she'd stopped Acathla, and she'd had enough emotionally draining conversations today to last a life time.

What had she been thinking going on patrol?

Buffy could hear him following her, and she tried to run faster, but her wound was slowing her. The blood loss was making her dizzy and Buffy could feel her pace slowing even though she was demanding her legs to move faster.

Pain shot from her stomach with every step she took. Adrenaline pumping through her veins only numbed the pain, and she knew it would only keep her going for so long. She glanced back over her shoulder, looking to see if she was still being followed—the hunter becoming the hunted.

Buffy looked back in front of her and skidded to a halt as she came face to face with her enemy, and most likely her killer.

Desperately she looked for an escape route, but she knew it was hopless. She was alone. She was going to die.

"You're going?" the vampire asked with a frown. "But you were having so much fun a minute ago!"

Buffy brought her stake up and made a lunge at him, but he easily knocked it from her grasp. Then she was flying through the air before hitting the stone wall of a crypt. Buffy couldn't help the whimper that escaped her. She looked up as the vampire approached her with her stake, a predatory gleam in his eye.

This was it. She was going to die.

Buffy watched as he raised the stake for the killing blow, and she stared up at her enemy helplessly. Suddenly, she saw a blur out of the corner of her eye, and then the vampire in front of her was on the ground.

A very familiar growl reached her ears and Buffy relaxed. Her adrenaline reserves had been all but drained, and she could barely keep her eyes open as the blood loss made her brain foggy. She glanced over to where she knew he was and watched as he punched her attacker over and over.

Angel punched the vampire underneath him relentlessly. It was all he could do. He smelled Buffy's blood and all he saw was red. Angel didn't know how long he pummeled the vampire before he realized that the bloody vampire underneath him was unconscious.

Angel grabbed the stake off the ground and plunged it into the vamp's chest.

He heard a whimper behind him and his eyes widened at the sight of Buffy struggling to her feet, using the mausoleum for support. Immediately, he rushed over to her.

"Buffy? What happened?" Angel asked as the smell of her blood overwhelmed his senses.

Buffy held up her hands, red with her blood. "Angel," she breathed as she took a tentative step towards him before collapsing unconscious into his arms.

Angel scooped her up and held her against his chest. He quickly made his way to his apartment, grateful that Buffy had just so happened to chose to patrol the cemetery that was closest to his place. Shutting the door behind him with his foot, Angel gently placed Buffy on the bed.

Forcing himself to remain calm, Angel got the first aid kit that he kept just for Buffy. Whenever she got hurt on patrol, she would usually come to him to avoid some questions from her mother. She even kept at least one change of clothes, which was helpful considering that her sweater was completely ruined.

Angel ridded her of the sweater and quickly inspected her wound. He thanked god for Slayer healing as the wound had already stopped bleeding. Thinking that he'd done this far too often, Angel bandaged Buffy's wound quickly and efficiently.

Just as he was placing the last piece of tape over the gauze, Buffy began to stir. "Ow," she groaned, causing a grin to pull at Angel's lips. Her eyes slowly focused on him and she blinked a few times before speaking. "Angel…?" she asked dazedly.

"I'm here, _Muirnín_," Angel assured her softly, caressing her cheek with his thumb.

"Ugh, I hate irony," Buffy muttered as her hand came to rest lightly on her gauze covered side.

"I'm not too amused," Angel said seriously.

"That makes two of us." Buffy sighed. "I can't believe I got stabbed with my own stake. That is so uncool."

"He was going to kill you," Angel whispered, causing Buffy's blasé attitude to falter.

"But he didn't," Buffy reminded him softly, placing her right hand on his muscled forearm. "You saved me."

"What were you doing? Why would you patrol?" Angel asked, ignoring how her touch had been like a spark of electricity shooting through him. "Don't you think you've done enough today?"

"I was mad," Buffy explained tiredly. "I had a fight with my Mom, after having my fight with you, which before then I'd had a fight with Xander. I'm really all fought out at the moment."

"What were you fighting about?" Angel asked, though he figured he already knew the answer.

"You," Buffy answered honestly, confirming Angel's guess. "She wanted me to stop seeing you."

"I don't blame her."

"Stop it," Buffy snapped as much as she could considering how exhausted she was. "I'm tired. I'm in pain. My back is going to have a bruise the size of Alabama tomorrow. My stomach's going to be sore for a week, and my arm got twisted in a way that was not meant to be. Can you _not_ do the self-deprecating thing?"

Angel's eyes softened. "What do you want me to do?"

"Hold me?" Buffy pleaded softly, and there was no way in hell Angel was going to refuse.

* * *

><p>Angel slowly came to awareness. The first thing he noticed was her scent. It seemed to bathe his small apartment, and Angel couldn't help but appreciate it the sweet vanilla and honey scent that held just a dash of roses. It was fantastic.<p>

The next thing he was conscious of was her warm body snuggled next to his. Her body heat had warmed his skin over the course of the night and now he was almost as warm as she was. It was an exhilarating feeling.

He was acutely aware of the rise and fall of her chest and the steady beat of her heart. She had donned one of his shirts to sleep in and Angel couldn't help the possessiveness that erupted in him at the sight of her in it. There was just something about _his_ girl in _his_ shirt.

Over the course of the night, her legs had tangled with his and he was vividly reminded of everywhere they were touching. Buffy was practically on top of him, and Angel's thoughts went from sweet and sentimental to…not so sweet and sentimental.

Images of their night of passion flitted through his brain, causing him to fight a groan for fear of waking up Buffy. Angelus had been so wrong when he'd insulted her the morning after. So, so, so incredibly wrong.

Buffy was brilliant in bed, and Angelus had just been jealous that _he_ hadn't been the one she'd made love to.

After that initial kiss, it had been like they couldn't get rid of their clothes fast enough. Only after shedding their clothes had Buffy become nervous. But Angel had just smiled, whispered in her ear that she was beautiful, and then he'd begun his worship of her body. He'd loved her, he'd shown her, physically, how much he loved her...and she'd reciprocated and totally rocked his world.

Angel didn't know if Buffy realized how much it meant to him that she'd chosen him to be her first. It was so important it was practically sacred to Angel, and he'd wanted to make her first time a night to remember.

Of course, losing his soul afterward had not been part of the plan.

The thought brought Angel up short and triggered a sentence that had been playing like a broken record over and over in his mind.

_Willow anchored your soul…her spell was the permanent version._

_Willow anchored your soul…her spell was the permanent version._

_Willow anchored your soul…her spell was the permanent version._

Angel couldn't stop replaying those words over and over in his mind. The idea that his soul was permanent so soon after just getting it back made it hard to believe. It seemed ludicrous and almost like a ridiculously lucky gift from a higher power.

But why would they give him something so precious when he didn't deserve it?

Angel didn't deserve to be happy. He didn't deserve Buffy's love. He was a killer, a monster. That was what he could consistently prove. No matter how many people he saved, he would never be able to even the balance. Angel almost snorted. He had a cosmic balance sheet. As if saving as many he'd killed would somehow make better of what he'd done.

But Angel was selfish.

He wanted Buffy. He wanted her love because she made him feel human. He wanted her smile because it brightened his world. He wanted her laughter because it was music to his ears. He wanted _her_. She was his everything. The light to his darkness. The Yin to his Yang. The zig to his zag. However you wanted to compare them. They completed each other.

But Buffy got the short straw.

She have him everything, and he gave her nothing.

He couldn't give her children or a peaceful life. He couldn't take her out into the sun. He couldn't grow old with her. What did he have to offer?

Buffy stirred in his arms then, and Angel looked down to see a pair of sleepy green eyes staring up at him.

"Hey."

"Hey," Buffy smiled softly. "Now this is nice…waking up with you."

"It is," Angel admitted truthfully.

"It has its advantages." Buffy said before reaching up and brushing her lips against his.

Angel immediately responded, running a hand through her hair and another down her back, over her hip, finally coming to rest on her thigh, as Buffy shifted so that she was straddling him. She broke the kiss and then kissed her way down his neck. She nipped his shoulder playfully as her hands slid down his stomach, causing him to growl.

Angel brought her face back to his, kissing her deeply as his hands slid underneath her shirt. However, when his fingers grazed her gauze covered side, he froze.

Buffy pulled away to look at him. "Uh oh, I don't like that look. What's wrong?"

"This."

"That's the second time you've told me that in less than twenty-four hours," Buffy deadpanned. "I'm really feelin' the love here, Angel."

Angel gently moved Buffy off of him and got out of the bed, feeling the need to pace.

"What's going on, Angel?" Buffy asked, growing anxious. "Because you know, I was really enjoying my morning."

"It's nothing," Angel shook his head, and Buffy snorted.

"Yeah, sure," she said disbelievingly. "You've got a 'something' face. It's not nothing."

"I've just been thinking…"

"Surprise, surprise."

"I'm serious Buffy."

"So am I," Buffy said firmly. "All you do is think. Well you know what excessive thinking leads to besides migraines? _Over-thinking_."

"You deserve more," Angel said seriously. "More than I can give."

Buffy sighed. "Are we really going to hash this out now?" she asked. Personally, Buffy had had enough emotionally draining conversations.

"You deserve more than demons and darkness," Angel continued.

"Guess that's a 'yes,'" Buffy muttered.

"You should be with someone who can take you into the light." Angel looked at her, begging her to understand. "You deserve someone who can make love to you."

"The latter is no longer a problem," Buffy pointed out.

"Isn't it?" Angel retorted. "Do you really want to test it out and then find out it didn't work?"

Buffy hesitated. "I trust Willow."

"I don't know," Angel shook his head.

"Don't you want to? I mean," Buffy floundered as Angelus's words the morning after ran through her mind. "Don't you want me?"

Angel halted his paced and looked at her incredulously. "Every minute of every day," he answered with immediate, blunt honesty. "Buffy, none of what Angelus said that morning was true. It was all a lie, designed to hurt you." Angel moved toward her and caressed her cheek with his thumb. "He was just jealous because you'd made love to me and not him."

"Well that raises a girl's self-esteem," Buffy said softly, with a slight smile, though secretly she was soaring with the newly acquired information, not to mention overwhelmed with relief. Buffy remembered their argument and realized she needed to address it, or eventually he'd come back to it. "And don't worry about the sunlight thing, I don't care about that."

"You will," Angel argued as he resumed his pacing, snapping out of his soothing demeanor, and picking up right where he'd left off. Buffy was mentally kicking herself. "And children."

"Children?" Buffy repeated wide-eyed. "Can you say jumping the gun? I kill my goldfish."

"You have no idea how fast it goes, Buffy," Angel shook his head. "Before you know it, you'll want it all, a normal life."

"I'll never have a normal life," Buffy disagreed, wonderingly idly how long he'd been brooding about this.

"Right, you'll always be a Slayer," Angel agreed, but then he added. "Which is all the more reason to have a real relationship instead of this—this freak show," he said disdainfully.

Buffy looked at him stunned.

Realizing what he'd said, Angel said quickly, "I didn't mean that."

"I'm gonna go," Buffy said numbly as she climbed out of the bed, her perfect morning down the drain.

Angel grabbed her arm. "I'm sorry," he apologized, his brown eyes begging for forgiveness. "You know how much I love you, Buffy. It kills me to say this…"

"Then don't!" Buffy snapped angrily. "Who are you to tell me what's right for me? You think I haven't thought about this?"

"Have you?" Angel challenged. "Rationally?"

Buffy scoffed. "No," she said sarcastically. "No, I haven't. I'm just some swoony little schoolgirl, right?"

"I'm trying to think about what's right here, okay?" Angel retorted frustrated. "I'm trying to think with my brain instead of my heart."

"Heart?" Buffy repeated. "You have a heart? It isn't even beating!"

"Don't—," Angel began, but Buffy had had enough.

"Don't what?" Buffy interrupted. "Don't love you? I'm sorry. You know what? I didn't know that I got a choice in that," she said angrily. "I'm _never_ going to change. I _can't_ change. All I want is my life to be with you."

"It's not fair to you," Angel shook his head.

"Gah, would it kill you to be selfish just once?" Buffy cried, slapping his chest in frustration. "Would it kill you to just see yourself for who you are?"

"You're not a monster," Buffy stated fiercely. "You don't deserve to suffer. You deserve happiness, and if I'm the key then yippie for me, I'm ecstatic! I'm selfish. I want you. All of you. I love you. _All of you_. Every little facet that makes you who you are, I love. You don't have to give me the freakin' moon Angel! I just want _you_. You are _enough_."

"I-I can't," Angel shook his head, tears in his eyes. "I want to, but I can't."

"Fine!" Buffy threw up her hands in frustration. "Fine! Be a stubborn idiot."

Buffy stomped over to the dresser drawer where she kept some of her clothes for the nights when her patrols that ended with a fashion emergency. She dug out a pair of jeans and pulled them on quickly. Buffy sat down on the bed, grabbing her boots and putting them on with much more force than was really necessary.

"Are we breaking up?" Angel asked quietly, causing Buffy to freeze.

"No," Buffy said firmly. "No, we are just having a really huge fight that makes us both mad as hell at each other! Frankly, I think we were about due for one!" she said before storming towards the door.

"Buffy—," Angel began and Buffy interrupted him, not wanting him to completely ruin her dramatic exit.

"And yes, I am taking your shirt!" she declared before storming out of his apartment.

* * *

><p><strong>Hehehe...the whole taking the shirt line cracks me up every time. Soooooo...how'd ya like? I know I took the 'break-up' convo from later in Season 3 and put it here. There's a reason for that. And yes, I did have Buffy be stabbed with her own stake like in "Fool For Love." It was something dramatic, and it would freak Angel out so much he'd forget for a moment all the broody, I-don't-deserve-anything, nasty thoughts and focus solely on Buffy. It gave a chance to lighten up with just a little bit of fluff...which promptly turned into a fight, but I swear, our two lovebirds are slowly making progress! If you can just make it through chapter 8, then you're through the worst of the angst! :D<strong>

**Lots and lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Hey guys! Here we are with another chapter. I'm so glad that all of you seemed to enjoy the last chapter! It was one of my favs. Yes, yes, I know that Angel is being really, really, really stubborn...but he's Angel...that's sort of his thing...**

**Don't worry though. Buffy's just as stubborn as he is. :D**

**Okay, so...I have a Psych test today. I'm excited. Today, for that one particular hour, I will be so, ridiculously happy. Really. I can't wait...did my sarcasm come across by chance? ;D**

**Sooooo...moving on to the chapter...**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Me: Okay folks, let's begin shall we?**

_**Buffy: As long as I'm done arguing...**_

**Me: (whistles innocently)**

_**Buffy: Oh, come on! Seriously? (sighs) Who am I fighting with now?**_

_**Xander: Hey, Buff! Angel gone yet?**_

_**Buffy: (glares)**_

**Me: (laughs nervously) Uh...Xander...what are you doing in my disclaimer?**

_**Xander: Because I...well, just because...**_

_**Oz: Is it just me, or am I the only one who thinks this is just a little weird? Does this ArthursCamelot even realize we're just fictional characters?**_

**Me: But you're awesome fictional characters.**

_**Giles: (cleans glasses) She does have a point.**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 6<p>

Buffy walked down the sidewalk with her arms crossed over her chest, staring broodingly ahead of her. Such a role reversal, though it did comfort her that she knew Angel was brooding too.

Why did he have to be such an idiot?

Angel was always so self-sacrificing. Always, and Buffy doubted that the fact would ever change. She loved Angel, she really did. She loved everything that he was…even if some things _really_ annoyed her.

Why couldn't he have normal annoying quirks? Like snoring (even if it was impossible).

For a moment, Buffy had been sure that he was going to break up with her. Everything had seemed to be leading up to that point, but Buffy had utterly refused to accept it, so she'd fought back. She knew she shouldn't have told Angel that she and her mom had fought about him, but she couldn't resist that look in his eye that just begged 'trust me.'

Their arguement seemed to still ring in her ears, like it was on replay. How could he think those things? Didn't he realize that the ideal life was totally and completely out of the picture for her? Kids, seriously? Why would she bring a child into her life? It would be too much danger, too much risk. Besides, the only children she would ever have would be Angel's.

Didn't he know that?

Buffy sighed. She didn't know if Angel knew anything at the moment. He was just being such an idiot. A stubborn, self-sacrificing idiot.

And she still loved him.

Buffy walked into her house and immediately went straight toward the stairs, trying to be climb them as silent as possible.

"Buffy Anne Summers!"

Buffy cursed under her breath and turned around to see her mother standing at the base of the stairs, glaring up at her disapproval shining on her face.

"Mom—," Buffy began immediately as she turned around to face her mother.

"No, don't 'mom' me," Joyce interrupted shaking her head.

Buffy closed her mouth and just let her mom talk.

"We were having a discussion—"

_Argument, _Buffy corrected in her head.

"—And you just stormed out of here without telling me where you were going…"

_Except I did. _

"—I stayed up all night worrying…"

Guilt washed over Buffy's face, realizing that her mother had a point.

"—And here you are, coming in the house in the middle of the afternoon wearing…" Joyce paused and looked at Buffy closely. "Angel's shirt?" she questioned.

"Yeah, I stole it," Buffy answered with a shrug. "Mine got ruined."

Joyce looked uneasy at this news. She shifted her feet feeling awkward. "Um, h-how exactly did your sweater get ruined?"

Buffy eyes widened. "Mom!" she complained. "Jeez, no! I just ran into a little trouble last night, that's all. Slaying is just a little detrimental to the wardrobe, sometimes," Buffy explained with a dramatic sigh.

"I stayed at Angel's last night because he saved my life, _again_." Joyce's eyes widened, wondering what happened. "And he patched me up, and then we both fell asleep. I left as soon as I woke up."

Buffy knew she was stretching the truth just a little, but she figured that her mother wouldn't take too kindly to hers and Angel's make out session that morning. And she really didn't even want to think about their fight anymore at the moment.

"Well, um, okay then," Joyce stammered, still trying to come to grips with the events of the past few days. "Mr. Giles called," she explained. "He, uh, wanted to talk to you. Something about a meeting?"

"Where?" Buffy asked.

"His apartment?" Joyce suggested, thinking for a moment. "Yes, that's what he said," she repeated, mostly to herself.

Buffy nodded. "Alrighty," she sighed, turning back to head up stairs to her room.

"Um, Buffy?" Joyce called after her, sounding anxious.

"Yeah, Mom?"

"Would you mind if I came with you?" Joyce asked cautiously. "I just think that as your mother, I need to know more about what you do."

Buffy had to admit that her mother had a point…but still, Buffy didn't know if she wanted her mother to know _exactly_ what all she did. "Uh, sure thing," Buffy finally decided, offering her mom a weak smile.

"Oh, okay, thank you," Joyce returned the smile, awkwardly, still wondering exactly what was going on.

Joyce's life was not what it appeared, and she wanted to set the facts straight in her mind. She'd been lied to for years, and she wasn't happy about it. However, a part of her realized that this was something she would never fully be able to grasp…but she was still willing to try.

Buffy nodded, and turned back up the stairs, quickly disappearing into her room. Quickly, Buffy unbuttoned Angel's shirt, figuring that wearing it to the Scooby meeting wouldn't really help her any.

She folded it carefully and put it in a drawer of her dresser that she saved for pajamas—she really liked sleeping in his shirt.

Buffy was just about to head over to her closet to pick out a new shirt when she realized that she should probably shower. She was still grimy from the day before, and now that she was really moving around, she realized how sore she was.

Buffy stepped into her bathroom and stared at her reflection. Amazingly, from the front, she just looked like she'd had one hell of a day. Except for the wonderfully purple, hand-shaped bruise that wrapped around her forearm…she could even see the outlines of the vamp's fingers.

Buffy took a deep breath and turned her back to the mirror and then looked over her shoulder at the reflection. She cringed. As she'd predicted, she had a large, absolutely hideous bruise that spanned the majority of her back. It was bigger than Alabama. More like Texas-size.

This bruise deserved a long soak in the tub, but Buffy knew she didn't have the time. Instead, she turned the water on in the shower as hot as she could stand and climbed in.

* * *

><p>It was a very silent, awkward ride over to Giles' apartment. Joyce was nervous about what she would learn, and Buffy was just nervous in general. What would her Mom think? How would she react? What would the Scoobies think?<p>

As soon as the Jeep was stopped, Buffy was out the door, unable to stand the silent awkwardness any longer. Joyce hurried to keep up with her, but didn't say anything. Buffy knocked on Giles door, and it was almost immediately answered.

"Buffy, we were—," Giles began, but he stopped when he noticed that she was not alone. "Mrs. Summers," he said cautiously. "Um, what brings you here?"

"I know, Mr. Giles," Joyce said flatly, accusing Giles with her eyes. "I know that Buffy's a Slayer."

"Oh," Giles felt the need to clean his glasses, but he resisted the urge. "Well, um, come in then."

Giles stood out of the way, and allowed both Buffy and Joyce to pass through the doorway. "Can I get you anything?" he offered. "Tea?"

"No thank you," Joyce shook her head slightly, looking rather out of place, but no one mentioned it.

"Buffy?" Giles asked.

"No tea for me," Buffy declined, but then thought better of it. "You know what? Scratch that, and get me a cup, please? I'm feeling rebellious."

Giles lips pulled up at the corners in a small, half-smile. "I'll be right back with that," he said before looking at Joyce. "Please, make yourself comfortable."

"Buffy!" Willow smiled brightly, as she came in to the entryway to see what was taking so long. "You're lookin' better."

"A shower does wonders," Buffy returned Willow's smile faintly.

"You look tired though," Willow observed. "Long night?"

Buffy's eyes narrowed slightly, wondering if Willow meant that differently. "You could say that. Went on patrol, dusted some vamps…got a little roughed up in the process, but you know me, I'm tough."

"Uh, Mrs. Summers," Willow said somewhat nervously, belatedly noticing the elder Summers presence. "What brings you here? We were just going to hang out. You know, play some Scrabble…Xander mentioned Twister, but I really don't think we'll play that…"

"She knows Will," Buffy interrupted, stopping the flow of Willow's babble.

"Oh," Willow mimed Giles in her answer to the news. "Okay, then."

"Let's go into the living room, huh?" Buffy suggested, leading the way.

"Hey, Willow, baby—," Oz began as soon as they entered the room, but he stopped as soon as his gaze landed on Joyce. "Whoa, adult-that-is-not-Giles alert."

"It's okay, Oz," Willow smiled slightly, suddenly nervous as she joined her boyfriend on the couch. She took his hand and began fiddling with one of his rings.

Xander and Cordelia entered the apartment then and stopped the moment they saw Joyce. "Hi! Mrs. Summers, how are you?" Xander smiled nervously. "Whatever you're thinking, it's not what's happening."

"You're having a meeting and my daughter's the Slayer," Joyce said quickly and Xander's face showed his shock.

"Oh," he said glancing at Buffy and then quickly away, remembering their last conversation. "Well, in that case, it is what you're thinking."

"Hi," Cordelia said with a little wave. "I'm Cordelia."

"You're friends with Buffy?" Joyce questioned.

"Not really," Buffy and Cordelia both answered in unison, causing both of them to glare at each other.

"Here we are," Giles came in, bearing a tray of tea and cookies.

Buffy immediately grabbed a cup and a cookie and sat down carefully in Giles' recliner. Her Watcher noticed how conscientious of her movements she was being, but did not comment.

"Well," Giles said as he took off his glasses and cleaned them with the hem of his sweater. "Now, that's we're all here…I guess we can just delve right into it then."

"What are we going to do about Angel?" Xander immediately asked, no longer paying attention to the fact that Joyce was there.

"You say that like you have a plan in mind," Giles said slowly, glancing at Buffy who was apparently following his train of thought judging by the glare she was giving Xander.

"Well, we can't just let him frolic about all safe and sound," Xander said frustrated at how only he seemed to realize what all Angel had done.

"Angel has never, nor will he _ever_ frolic," Buffy said, her tone sounding cold even to her own ears. "I don't like what you're suggesting Xander."

"Buff, he's got some weird, funky…" Xander shook his head, thinking. Suddenly, he looked up at Giles, and Buffy could see the light bulb above his head. "Thrall, that's it! Buffy's under Angel's thrall!"

"You have got to be kidding me!" Buffy exclaimed, wide-eyed and furious.

"Why else would you think you love him?" Xander shot back, angrily. "What's to love? He's dead, and let's not forget to mention evil!"

"Angel is _not_ evil," Buffy said lowly, glowering at Xander with such a ferocity that he was immediately silent. Buffy looked around at all of them. "Let me just get this out of the way. I love Angel. And no amount of _thrall_," Buffy scoffed disdainfully at the word. "Could ever make me feel like I do. If any of you, _any of you_, try to hurt him, you better be ready to deal with a _seriously_ pissed off Slayer."

Buffy met everyone's eyes, making sure they knew she was serious, though how they could doubt she meant what she said was beyond her. "Capiche?"

"God, Buffy," Xander sighed, shaking his head. "What's going on with you?"

"What's going on with _you_, Xander?" Willow asked before Buffy could retort, fearing that Buffy might do something other than snap at Xander.

"Sorry, Will, but I just don't get it," Xander shook his head. "It's like none of you remember what he's done! He killed Jenny! He tortured Giles! He stalked Buffy, and tried to kill her more than once! He attacked us all and tried to end the world!"

Joyce's face had gone pale, but no one had noticed.

"And hey, call me crazy, I mean it may just be me, but I don't think that's a real good reason to keep him around!" Xander finished, his breathing slightly heavily as he settled back into his chair.

"Yeah, can we really just forget about the whole murder-stalking-crazy-evilness?" Cordelia questioned, looking nervous about speaking. Her eyes darted to Buffy almost as if she expected the Slayer to attack her.

"D-did Angel really do all of that?" Joyce asked and everyone's eyes darted to her.

"No," Willow shook her head, glancing at Buffy. "It was Angelus. Completely different."

"Will's right," Buffy said firmly. "Angel would never have done any of those things."

"And we never have to worry about Angelus ever again," Willow tried to bring some color back into Joyce's face with good news.

"We still don't know if it worked, Will," Xander interrupted, looking at Giles. "Right, G-man?"

"Well, obviously, Angel has his soul," Giles began, but Cordelia interrupted.

"But none of us have seen him except Buffy," she pointed out.

"How do we know it's not Angelus playing some trick?" Xander asked. "You gotta admit that you might see what you want to see, Buffy."

"He's Angel," Buffy said firmly. "I would know."

"You didn't know at first," Xander argued.

"Because I'd never seen Angelus before," Buffy replied easily, though unable to keep the hardness out of her tone. She was really fed up with Xander. "I think I'd know after everything that's happened if he were Angelus."

"Willow," Giles said slowly, hesitatingly. "I have no doubt that your spell worked in restoring Angel's soul. However, I'm still unsure as to whether it's permanent. Changing a spell like you did is risky."

"I'm telling you guys it worked," Willow said seriously. "I just know it did," she defended and Oz squeezed her hand reassuringly.

"So what do we do?" Oz asked, cautious curiosity slipping by his usually pensive expression.

"Well, Buffy's been expelled," Giles sighed. "But school is out and we can re-enroll her since the murder charge have been dropped."

"Good, cause that was a drag," Buffy sighed, relieved.

"And I guess, we'll, uh, leave Angel be," Giles said before taking a long sip of his tea, wishing it were something stronger.

"That's it?" Xander asked, raising his eyebrows. "We just let him off scot-free?"

"He is not getting out of this scot-free!" Buffy snapped. "He is suffering just like the rest of us, possibly more. He feels so much guilt that I can hardly look at him without flinching. It cuts me to my core to see him in so much pain, and you have the gall to say that you think he's just fine? Just moving on with his life? It doesn't work that way, Xander!" Buffy got to her feet angrily. "And if you can't get over your stupid, childish prejudice then I don't know how you can call yourself my friend! You've hated Angel from the beginning for absolutely no reason other than jealousy, and it stops now!"

"Fine," Xander snapped. "Sorry for just lookin' out for you. Like a _friend_ is supposed to do…"

"He saved my life last night!" Buffy interrupted, as tears sprung into her eyes. "I would have died, but he saved me! Just like he's saved your life more than once!"

"Yeah, but I didn't sleep with him to pay him back!" Xander shot back, angrily.

"Xander!" Willow interrupted, shocked to see her oldest friend acting like he was.

"Dude, calm down," Oz entreated cooly, but with an edge to his voice that no one had ever heard. "This isn't cool, man."

"Oh, come on, guys!" Xander began again, but Giles interrupted.

"Enough!" he yelled. He would not have a shouting match in his home. "That's enough, Xander," he said firmly. "You're Buffy's friend, and you care about her. We know that, and I believe Buffy knows it as well," Giles said, glancing at Buffy whose furious eyes hadn't wavered from Xander. "But you're out of line. A friend supports and respects. Right now, you're failing in both aspects."

Xander looked appropriately chastened for a moment, before shaking his head and getting to his feet. "You know I love ya Buffster," Xander said quietly. "And I'm sorry if I'm hurting you, but I just can't change how I feel about him." He looked back at Cordelia. "You coming?"

Xander didn't even wait for her to answer before marching out of the apartment. Cordy glanced from Xander to everyone else in the room, biting her lip. She didn't necessarily agree with Xander, though she did believe some of what he'd said. She was still terrified of Angel, and she knew her nightmares would still plague her for weeks to come…she got up and followed Xander out the door.

Everyone was quiet for a moment, before Joyce found her voice. "Do these meetings always go like this?"

"No," everyone answered at the same time.

"Usually there's jokes," Willow offered.

"And pizza," Oz added.

"And lots of old books," Giles couldn't help but add to the conversation.

"Well," Willow said as she sensed that she and Oz needed to skedaddle. "This has been…" Willow began, but shook her head. "Uh, me and Oz are just going to go."

"Yeah," Oz agreed as he got up, offering Willow a hand.

"See ya, Buffy," Willow smiled as she gave Buffy a hug, not seeing her friend fight back a wince as she unknowingly caused her back to throb painfully.

"Bye Wills," Buffy whispered. "And thanks. You know, for being on my side."

"I'm always on your side, Buffy," Willow smiled faintly. "It's a best friend's duty that I take very seriously."

"And I'm with her," Oz smiled slightly, before sobering. "I know what it's like to have a—wild side," he euphemized. "Angel's a pretty okay guy for a vamp…" Oz suddenly became deadly serious as he added. "Of course, Angelus…well, if I ever see him again I'll rip his throat out."

Buffy glanced at Willow, knowing the reason for Oz's threat. She couldn't help but nod in understanding. She knew how much Oz loved Willow. She couldn't hold it against him.

"Noted," she nodded, slightly.

"Okay," Willow said slowly, dragging out the word. "We'll be going."

Buffy watched as Willow and Oz left the apartment. When she heard the door shut, she finally turned around to see that Giles and her Mom were in a sort of standoff.

"Mrs. Summers," Giles said seriously. "You must understand why you had no knowledge of Buffy's Calling. It's not only against the rules, but it would also make you a target. You would give Buffy a weakness that demons could exploit in order to get to her."

"Yes," Joyce agreed, seeing his logic. "I can understand that…but I don't like being lied to."

"I'm sorry, but it had to be done," Giles replied. "However, now that you know, I suppose you will want to know more about Buffy's Slaying?"

"She told me most of it," Joyce said, glancing at Buffy who was looking back and forth between both of them. "I think."

"You know the gist of it," Buffy conceded. "Little details are really pointless. There's lots of big bads out there. It's a lot of names to remember."

"You're her Watcher?" Joyce asked, and Giles nodded. "Buffy says you're like Yoda."

Giles sent an amused, yet exasperated look at his charge. "Although I am not a short, green being, and do not often speak in inverted syntax, yes, I suppose that is a valid metaphor."

"Is what Xander said true?" Joyce asked nervously. "Did Angel…did he really…"

"No," Giles shook his head. "Angelus was the one who—," he trailed off uncertainly, glancing at Buffy who was wearing such a guilty look that it made his heart break. Giles couldn't separate Angel from Angelus. Logically, he knew that they were two distinct and different entities. But Giles knew it would be a long time before his emotions caught up to his brain. However, Giles couldn't add to Buffy's guilt.

"Angel is completely innocent," Giles stated. "It was not him who...did what he did."

"I understand," Joyce said quickly, not wanting to hear any more.

"I spent the night at Angel's apartment," Buffy told Giles, who looked at her seriously. "We didn't do anything," Buffy said quickly. "I got hurt on patrol and Angel saved me, but—I was unconscious and he took care of me and we fell asleep. Giles, I know that he's really Angel," Buffy said adamantly, not wanting Xander to plant a seed of doubt in Giles' mind.

"I believe you," Giles said softly, and Buffy hadn't heard kinder words all day.

* * *

><p><strong>Whew, Scooby meeting on fire. Xander will be a complete jerk for a while, if you haven't already picked up on that. It was soooo weird writing all the Scoobies together like that. I hadn't done that since Two Sides! And I had to make everyone all angsty and irrational...(shudders)... ;D<strong>

**Review and make my day,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: Hey guys! It's finally the weekend! And...I still don't have much of a weekend. I'll be at a choir clinic thingy for the majority of the day and then tomorrow me and dear ol' dad are going leaf hunting. Then, my next 3 weekends are toast too. I have no idea when I'll be able to write! Life really annoys me sometimes. **

**So...moving on to better, happier things! New chapter, and one that I'm very anxious to know your reaction! This chapter only involves two characters...**

**Wanna guess which two? :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy).**

**Me: Guys?**

**...**

**Me: Guys? Hello?**

**...**

**Me: Okay, come on, seriously? I dedicate an entire chapter to you two and I don't even get an answer?**

_**Giles: I suppose she has a point.**_

_**Angel: Yeah, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 7<p>

Angel stared broodingly at the blank sketchbook in front of him. It had been exactly six hours and twenty-three minutes since Buffy had left his apartment, and Angel had yet to think of anything else since.

Normally, he would have known exactly what to draw. He always knew exactly what moment he wanted to capture. Buffy had become the focus of his inspiration; the result being that he already had one sketchbook full of pictures of just her. Different moments that were special to him, moments that he wanted to freeze in time.

Sadly, he had no moment he wanted to capture lately. Their last two conversations had been arguments, and not the silly, pointless arguments that they had far too often. Two, full blown, serious arguments. It was a test of wills on both sides, and neither of them was willing to give.

Angel wanted to do what was best. Wasn't that right? Shouldn't he put her before himself? He'd tried, but Buffy wasn't listening…not that he'd really expected her to. She was so persistent. Persistent in the belief that everything would work out, that everything would be fine as long as they had each other. It was a sentiment that Angel wanted to put faith in, but he just couldn't make the leap.

What future did she have with him? None. What could he give her? Nothing.

Well, nothing except love.

Angel could promise her to love her forever and know that he would never break that promise. It was the only true promise he would ever be able to make. There was just so much more he wanted to give her. He wanted her to have a white picket fence and roses and kids—the whole nine yards.

Buffy said she didn't want all that, but Angel just couldn't believe it…or maybe he just didn't want to.

Maybe he didn't want to think that she loved him enough to give all that up. Maybe he didn't want to believe that for once, just being himself was enough. Maybe he just didn't want to believe that something good could actually happen to him, that he deserved something good to happen to him.

If Angel were a vindictive man he'd say that he _did_ deserve some good in his existence. After everything that he'd done, all the guilt and remorse he'd suffered, the loneliness…he should probably feel as though he deserved this one hundred and fifty percent.

Except he didn't.

He was completely undeserving.

But it was Buffy…

Angel had long ago forgotten the mere concept of love. It was something he had gone without so long, and it was sad that he had been able to forget the feeling of love. Of being loved, of loving someone. Buffy had made him feel again. She made him feel human, she made him feel alive.

She was his everything.

Buffy was so sweet and pure and innocent, yet at the same time she was strong, intelligent, and fierce. She was Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and she was Buffy Summers. He loved them both. He loved _her_, completely and entirely.

Hadn't she said practically the same thing about him?

_I want you. All of you. I love you. All of you. Every little facet that makes you who you are, I love. You don't have to give me the freakin' moon Angel! I just want you. You are enough._

He was enough.

But, why? Why? What had he ever done to deserve that kind of devotion? Angel doubted it was the hundred and fifty years of terror, or the ensuing hundred years of self-loathing. What had he done to deserve her?

All he'd done was love her…was that really all she wanted?

Angel hoped so, because that was all he could give.

But was it right? The question ran like a loop in his mind, and it was driving him insane.

Angel sighed and ran a frustrated hand through his hair. It always came back to him. Buffy was all in. Angel was the one deciding whether or not to fold. This was his problem. The entire situation was his problem. It was him who was pushing her away.

It was just that Angel couldn't let himself be happy. It just didn't seem right, especially after everything that had happened recently. After all, he'd barely been himself for twenty-four hours.

It hadn't been too long ago that he'd killed Jenny.

It hadn't been too long ago that he'd tortured Giles.

It hadn't been too long ago that he'd tried to end the world.

Victims faces popped into his mind randomly, and Angel closed his eyes, almost as if the action would make them go away. Even after all these years, he knew that closing his eyes wouldn't banish them from his mind…but he still tried every single time.

So many lives. So many…much more than Buffy knew. All of them young, for the most part anyway. Their lives cut short, by him. It was his fault. He'd ended their lives. Extinguished. Gone.

Dead.

Suddenly, the apartment felt stifling. The urge to escape the confines of the walls was overwhelming and Angel abruptly sprung off the bed, grabbed his jacket off the chair as he passed, and was out the door in no more than four strides.

* * *

><p>Angel walked through Sunnydale, paying absolutely no attention to the people with whom he shared the little stretch of sidewalk. His only thought about the people around him was that they were so naïve, so happy in their own little lives. They didn't know that he could have killed them all. Yesterday he could have ended all their lives. They didn't know that one girl, one seemingly innocent girl, had saved them all.<p>

His legs carried him to a cemetery, one that he and Buffy had patrolled often. There were many memories in this cemetery. Many memorable moments, and a particularly important one suddenly flashed to the forefront of his mind.

_Listen. If we date, you and I both know that one thing's gonna lead to another._

_One thing already has lead to another. You think it's a little late to be reading me a warning label?_

_I'm just trying to protect you. This could get out of control._

_Isn't that the way it's supposed to be?_

_This isn't some fairytale. When I kiss you, you don't wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after._

_No, when you kiss me I want to die._

Huh, they'd been right.

One thing had lead to another, and surprise! Angelus.

He was trying to protect her, but she wasn't listening as usual.

Things _already_ had gotten out of control.

It was _not_ the way things were supposed to be.

And it sure as hell wasn't a fairytale.

A soft sound drifting on the breeze caught Angel's attention, and he glanced to his right to see Giles standing in front of a grave. Angel knew instantly whose it was, and he was rocked by another wave of pure guilt and self-loathing.

He'd been planning on visiting Jenny's grave sometime. He planned to pay a visit to the graves of _all_ his most recent victims for that matter, but he'd planned to visit Jenny's first. Angel debated whether or not to approach Giles or not. He only entertained the thought for a second before deciding that interrupting Giles' time was exactly the thing he _didn't_ need to do.

So he waited.

Eventually, Giles seemed to finish and Angel slunk back into the shadows with a practiced ease, not disturbing anything around him. Angel waited until Giles was out of sight and then he slowly approached Jenny Calendar's grave.

Her tombstone was practical, mirroring her personality in life. The stone bore her name, the one that they'd known her by, Jenny Calendar. It had her birthday and the date on which he'd killed her.

Kill. It was such a potent word. Murder was the same, but it was a fancier word, all dressed up. Kill was simple. End a life. End someone's existence. Four letters. All it took was four letters to spell out kill. K-I-L-L. You'd think that for something so drastic, so evil, it would have more than four letters.

"I'm so sorry." Angel whispered as he remembered snapping her neck. It had been so easy. So easy to kill her. Something so evil was so easy.

A lone tear slide down his cheek, "I'm so, so sorry, Jenny."

"I wish I would have known what would happen," Angel said softly. "If I'd known…I swear I wouldn't have—we wouldn't have…" Angel sighed and closed his eyes, feeling a few more tears escape from his eyes. "I never wanted this to happen."

"And yet it did," Giles said from behind him, causing Angel to whirl around surprised. "You really shouldn't let your guard down so easily, Angelus," the Watcher advised. "What if I'd had a stake?"

"Except you do have a stake," Angel pointed out, knowing that the Watcher had a stake in his pocket, within a second of his reach if he needed it.

"Ah, but see, it's not in your heart," Giles retorted. "That's about as good as I can do."

Angel shrugged, but didn't reply.

"You'd let me kill you?" Giles questioned as he took in Angel's silence, raising his eyebrows in slight surprise.

"No," Angel answered softly, shaking his head. "But not because I'm selfish and I don't want to die—for good. It's just—it's the easy way out."

"You already live with so much guilt," Giles told him.

"What's a little bit more?" Angel asked rhetorically, his voice almost a whisper.

"You care," Giles observed. He'd never truly seen the weight of the guilt Angel carried. Angel was far too reserved to show his true feelings, well, at least to anyone except Buffy. Giles himself had rarely seen Angel display anything other than calm and the occasional flare of jealousy.

But this…Angel's current expression, it was total anguish. His guilt was palpable, the air seemed heavier around him. Giles was just waiting for the sky to open up and release a torrent of tears to accent Angel's expression.

"Yes," Angel answered, glancing at Jenny's grave. "I care."

They were both quiet for a moment before Angel turned towards Giles; however, the moment the Watcher saw Angel's expression, he raised up his hand.

"Don't," he said coldly. "Don't you dare apologize to me."

Angel just nodded in understanding.

"How are you able to stand next to me?" Angel wondered honestly.

"Buffy," Giles replied truthfully. "She still sees good in you."

"And you?"

"I honestly no longer know where Angelus ends and Angel begins," Giles answered as he stared at Angel, almost as if he were trying to separate them in his mind. "You share the same face. After months of seeing Angelus, it's hard to know who is who." Giles continued on, not bothering to care if Angel wanted to interrupt. "Buffy has the ability to see you and Angelus as two completely separate beings. Her love for you blinds her. Angelus is a part of what makes you who you are. You yourself have your own darkness that I don't think she sees."

Angel knew that Giles was right. Angel himself was capable of terrible things, soul and all. When he sunk into that darkness it wasn't pretty.

Giles considered Angel's silence, noting that the vampire was neither confirming nor denying his assertions.

"What about Buffy?" Angel asked quietly.

"I don't know," Giles replied. "Though I have been wondering what you two are going to do."

"She wants to stay together," Angel told him, though he figured that Giles already knew that.

"I know," Giles said, confirming Angel's suspicion. "Though," he continued slowly, his gaze hardening and Angel had never seen the Watcher's eyes hold so much venom. "If I had things my way, you would be dead, permanently, and Buffy would forget about you completely."

"What's stopping you?" Angel asked quietly.

"Because you're everything to her," Giles sighed. "You're all she thinks about—you make her happy. She loves you, even with everything that's happened, everything you've put her through—she can't stop loving you."

_You're the one freaky thing in my freaky world that still makes sense to me._

Buffy's words rang in Angel's mind.

"I love her," Angel said softly. "More than she'll ever know." He looked at Giles, a small wry smile on his face. "I love her enough to leave her—that's what I tried to do this morning."

"You're still here."

"Yeah," Angel shook his head. "Buffy wasn't too thrilled. Apparently, we're not breaking up. We're just having a really big fight that we were about due for."

"Apparently."

"Apparently," Angel sighed and looked up at Giles. "I know I don't deserve her. I don't deserve happiness. I just…"

"Love her," Giles finished for him, nodding. "I know the feeling," he added softly.

"I wish we'd known," Angel whispered.

"As do I."

* * *

><p><strong>This chapter was so much fun to write. I've never written those two together before, just them and no one else. It was awesome! Ya like? <strong>

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**_  
><em>


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Okay, here we are! We've made it! Thank you so, so, so much for the reviews! You guys are epic! Epic! And to reward all of you...The heavy angst ends with this chapter! Yay! Now, before you guys do a victory dance, I have to warn you that the angst doesn't lighten up until the end of the chapter. This chapter is still angst...it's just that after this, it's really not so bad. It goes from angst to suspense/drama, so I think you guys can live with that, right? :D**

**I finished my leaf collection! Thank goodness, let's all do a happy dance! That's a load off my mind, I tell you. Now, all I really have to focus on is my research paper. Joy. But, anywho, moving on...**

**This chapter is my fav. It was so fun to write, and I stole a few lines from here and there because of the context. Because I'm rewriting the season, that particular little bit of dialogue is better applied to this situation than in canon.**

**By the way, we're skipping ahead about two weeks from last chapter. :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Me: Woo! We're here guys! It's time!**

_**Buffy: For what? **_

**Me: Your final, epic argument!**

_**Buffy: (deadpan) You've got to be kidding.**_

_**Angel: (broody) I don't think she is.**_

**Me: Trust me guys...you'll like the end...a LOT...**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 8<p>

Angel wandered aimlessly along the docks. He didn't know why he was here. The days since he'd gotten his soul back had been a blur. Only two weeks ago he had been Angelus. Only two weeks ago he had tried to awaken Acathla. Only two weeks ago had he tried, with all his might, to kill Buffy.

Buffy. They hadn't seen each other since their last argument at his apartment. He knew that she had come by, more than once, but the moment he'd smelled her fresh scent he'd bolted. Angel didn't know if he could face her. He feared what would happen if he did.

It wouldn't necessarily be a bad outcome if they met, but Angel was sure what would happen. They'd argue. They'd yell…and then they'd go at each other like two lovesick teenagers. Passion. It was something that neither of them lacked, and sometimes it was their enemy.

Angel hadn't seen anyone other than Buffy and Giles. Well, Angel had seen Willow once, a few days after she'd been released from the hospital. He'd climbed up the balcony to her room again, and he'd been surprised when she'd immediately invited him in. However, he didn't take the invitation. It seemed better, for him at least, to remain outside.

She'd immediately chewed him out for avoiding Buffy. Such a great friend she was. Angel had let her scold him, not bothering to interrupt. She'd promised him that his soul was anchored and permanent. She'd promised.

Angel had asked her why. Why had she done this? For him? For Buffy? Why? Willow had been silent for a moment, and then she'd given him the answer that was what he'd expected and yet still couldn't believe.

"_Because you and Buffy deserve it."_

Angel didn't know how either Buffy or Willow could think he deserved anything.

The wind blew slightly then, and the scent of salt water hit him strongly, causing him to break out of his reverie. He looked around and seemed to remember where he was. After all, he'd just started walking, not being able to take sitting in his apartment any longer. He didn't think he'd consciously chosen a direction, yet somehow he'd ended up at the docks.

Angel remembered the last time he was here, vividly.

_Well, if you haven't noticed someone pretty much always wants us dead._

She'd been so worried. He'd wanted to reassure her.

_Don't say that. We'll be fine._

_We don't know that._

_We can't know Buffy. Nobody can. That's just the deal. I have something for you, for your birthday. I was going to give it to you earlier, but…_

Angel remembered reaching into his pocket to show her the Claddagh ring he'd gotten for her. In that moment, the little piece of metal had never felt so heavy.

Ideally, he would have rather given her the ring surrounded by candles and roses and the whole shebang. But, as usual, the supernatural screwed up his plans, _again_.

At least she'd liked it.

_It's beautiful._

_My people, before I was changed, exchanged this as a sign of devotion. It's a Claddagh ring. The hands represent friendship, the crown represents loyalty, and the heart…well, you know…wear it with the heart pointing towards you. It means you belong to somebody. Like this._

Angel remembered showing her his Claddagh. He'd never been so nervous. He couldn't even say the word 'love.' The most important thing about the ring, the heart, and he couldn't say 'love.' He'd been _that_ nervous. Buffy was the only woman that had ever made him nervous. Well, except for his mother and Kathy, but they were long gone.

Slipping the ring on Buffy's finger, feeling it fit her perfectly; Angel had felt the faint stirrings of true happiness in him. The feeling had felt so foreign; he'd almost been unable to place it. Realizing this, the courage to tell her that he loved her came to him.

And right before he was able to get the words out they were attacked.

Figures.

Angel leaned against the railing. The very same railing that Buffy had gone over, the very same railing that he'd leapt over to save her. He slid his Claddagh off his finger and held it in his hand, staring at it. He studied the ring. The hands represented friendship. He didn't know if he and Buffy could ever be just friends. He loved her too much—far, far too much. The crown represented his loyalty. He'd always be loyal to Buffy, always no matter what. She was his everything, and without her he was nothing. The heart, _his_ heart, would forever be hers. That was something that would never fail to remain true.

"Don't tell me you're thinking about tossing that."

Angel whirled around. "Buffy! You scared me."

"Now you know how it feels, Stealth Guy," Buffy smirked slightly as she walked up beside him and leaned against the railing, staring out over the water. "Whatcha doin' here?"

"I have no idea," Angel answered honestly. "I just sorta ended up here."

"Huh, me too," Buffy replied lightly. "Just got done with another Scooby meeting…my mom was in attendance, _again_."

"What?"

"Mom knows I'm a Slayer," Buffy elaborated idly. "I don't think I told you that the last time we spoke. How long ago was it? Oh, right, _two weeks_."

Angel's brow furrowed, ignoring the 'time' comment. "No, you didn't tell me she knew."

"Yeah, well," Buffy sighed. "I was on my way to kill you the other day, and she found out—it really didn't help when two of your guys jumped me and Spike right in front of her. Guys just turning to dust really raises some questions."

Angel was quiet as she reminded him of what had happened only a short while ago. "She didn't take it too well, then?" he assumed quietly.

"That's being kind," she said sarcastically before sobering as she recalled what all had been said before she'd left the house. "We fought," she admittedly quietly. "She…she wanted to call the police. You know the normal, rational thing to do. Of course, I was wanted for murder. But the good news was once she found out I was the Slayer she didn't think I actually killed Kendra." Buffy snorted, before continuing. "That was a big morale booster there. I was really feelin' the love."

"I'm sorry," Angel apologized quietly, feeling the guilt that he was all too familiar with rush through him. Though, oddly enough, this time it felt more potent, almost making him feel the need to sit down as the weight he carried nearly became too much.

"Oh, that's not even the best part," Buffy said, bitterness lacing her tone. "I was about to leave—I was running out of time. I knew I had to go. I'm at the door, right? My hand is on the doorknob…and you know what she says to me?" Buffy didn't give Angel a chance to answer. "She told me that if I walked out the door to not even think of coming back."

"I'm sorry," Angel repeated. "All of this is my fault."

"Will you stop doing that?" Buffy snapped. "My mother's reaction to my Slayerness is totally not your fault."

"But if I hadn't—"

"If _we_ hadn't," Buffy corrected him, frustration building in her veins as she talked to him for the first time in two weeks. Two. Weeks. He'd been avoiding her for two weeks, and now that she was facing him the slow anger that had been simmering underneath the surface began to boil.

"It wasn't just you that night Angel," she snapped. "I was there too, remember?"

Angel glared at her. "How could I forget?"

"Then stop trying to make this all about you!" Buffy said exasperatedly. "I am just as guilty as you, okay?"

"No you're not," Angel shook his head angrily. Buffy was completely innocent in his mind. She hadn't known what she was doing, but he had. He had known _exactly_ what he was doing. "None of what happened was your fault, Buffy! It was all me! I killed those people! I'm the one who tried to end the world, remember?"

"Of course I remember!" Buffy cried as angry, hurt tears pooled in her eyes. "How could I forget seeing the man I love with all my heart turn into an evil, soulless monster? How could I _forget_ looking into his eyes and seeing nothing but cold, calculating emptiness when I was so used to seeing warmth and compassion and love? How could I _forget_ hearing you mock me, laughing at me so cruelly? How could I forget _anything_ about the last few months, Angel?" Buffy sobbed, her heart feeling as though it were being ripped from her chest.

"Then why do you still love me!" Angel exclaimed, tears forming in his eyes that he couldn't hold back. "Tell me, Buffy! Why do I deserve everything that you have to give?"

"Love doesn't have reason, Angel!" Buffy sobbed angrily. "And I _hate_ it! I hate that it's _so_ hard! And I hate that you can hurt me _so_ much! But, dammit, I don't care! I love you! I know that I shouldn't and that all of this is so messed up, but I love you! It's just how it is!"

Buffy slapped his chest so hard that Angel stumbled back, and Buffy advanced on him. "You want me to tell you why I love you? Fine! I love you because you have the biggest heart! I love you because you care so much! I love you because you're so damn smart, even if you can be so stupid sometimes! I love you because _you_ love _me_! You make me feel like I'm the most important person in the world! When I'm around you I forget about all the bad in the world! It's just you and me! You make my heart flutter, you make my knees weak! When you kiss me I forget to breathe!"

Buffy was crying in earnest now. During her speech, she'd slowly backed Angel up against a shipping container and now they were so close that their chests were touching. Tears were pouring down her cheeks as she looked up at him to see that he too was crying just as hard as she was. He was hurting just as much as she was.

"What more do you want me to say?" Buffy whispered brokenly.

Angel just shook his head. He didn't want to hear anymore. He didn't know if he _could_ hear anymore. Angel stared into her eyes, her beautiful green eyes that were moist with tears. Tears shed for him, because of him. He hated that. He hated making her cry.

But she was right.

Love had no reason. It just was, and it sucked sometimes. Buffy could make him happy, and then she could make him mad as hell. She could make him laugh, and then she could make him cry. She had an unshakable hold over him, just as he had over her.

Suddenly, he was aware of their proximity. Their chests were touching, both of them breathing hard even though the action was a moot point for him. They were staring up at each other, each of them with pain in their eyes. Angel was overwhelmed with an urge to make her pain go away.

Unthinkingly, his lips crashed down on hers.

Buffy tensed in surprise, but then she immediately melted into him, molding herself to him. Her arms wrapped around his neck as his hands slid around her waist, keeping her tight against him. No space could exist.

They kissed until Angel broke away to allow Buffy to breathe, though his lips never strayed from her skin. A lone tear slid down her cheek, and he kissed it away before leaving a trail of little kisses down her neck. Buffy pulled his face back to hers and her lips were on his again. She trailed her tongue over his bottom lip, begging for entry.

Angel didn't hesitate to comply, letting her deepen the kiss. His hands gripped her hips firmly before lifting her up, and pressing her back against the shipping container. Buffy wrapped her legs tight around his waist as he nipped and sucked his way down her neck and along her collarbone.

"Angel," Buffy said breathlessly. "W-we…can't do this…" she paused as Angel kissed the sweet spot behind her ear. "Here…" she finished breathing hard as his hands began to wander.

"Right," Angel murmured, trying to fight through his lusty haze. "Right. Not here."

* * *

><p>The door to Angel's apartment was hardly shut before he had Buffy pressed up against it, kissing her hungrily. Buffy's hands flew to the buttons of his shirt, undoing them quickly before yanking the offensive article of clothing out of the way so she could run her hands over his chest. She felt his muscles tense under her touch, and Buffy couldn't fight the small smirk that pulled at her lips.<p>

Angel picked her up again, carrying her to the bed before setting her down gently. In the back of his mind, Angel knew that he should stop. He knew it wasn't right. They were both emotionally out of whack. They were both under too much stress. It wasn't right.

But it was.

It was _so_ right. They needed each other, a physical, aching need. Angel's conscience was shouting at him to stop because he was about to lose his soul again if Willow's spell hadn't worked fully, but Angel ignored it. He didn't care. He knew he should, but right now, with Buffy underneath him, touching him, he didn't care.

* * *

><p>Buffy woke up in a daze. She was nearly overcome with a sense of safety. She knew that this was how it felt to be invincible. Nothing could hurt her here. He wouldn't let anything hurt her.<p>

Her brain was slowly making sense of her surroundings. She felt strong arms wrapped around her, holding her close. One of her arms was draped over his waist. Her head rested on one broad shoulder. Buffy smiled softly as she came to the conclusion that she was in Angel's arms, in Angel's bed.

What a nice thought.

Buffy's eyes shot open in alarm. _Oh, God._

Her heat began to beat frantically, and she tried to control her breathing as panic gripped her in its cold, steely clutches. What had they done? Oh, no, not again. She couldn't handle this again. She couldn't look into his soulless eyes and know that she…

"Buffy?"

Buffy looked up at him, fearing what she would see. A cold mask…cruel, brown eyes…a merciless smirk…

"I'm still here, _Muirnín_," Angel assured her softly, his brown eyes shining with the depth of his soul.

Buffy immediately burst into tears of relief.

Angel held her tightly to him, rubbing a soothing hand down her back and muttering nonsense love words in her ear. After a few moments, Buffy drew some deep breaths to try and calm herself.

"We were so stupid," she mumbled into his neck.

"So stupid," Angel agreed.

"I don't regret it though," Buffy admitted softly.

"Me either." Angel gently rolled on top of her so he could see her face. He wiped away some errant tears tenderly with his thumb. "Willow's spell worked," he said obviously.

"I'm glad," Buffy smiled slightly, but Angel could see the conflict in her eyes. "I don't regret what happened last night—."

"And most of the morning—," Angel couldn't help but add.

"And most of the morning," Buffy revised, though she gave him a scolding look. Or at least, she _tried_ to give him a scolding look. She really only succeeded at conveying annoyed, loving irritation.

"But it was stupid and irresponsible and stupid," Buffy finished.

"You said stupid twice."

"Because it's twice as important."

"Irresponsible doesn't measure up to stupid, huh?" Angel joked, but seeing Buffy's glare, he became more somber. "Yeah," he agreed quietly. "It was stupid."

"But here we are," Buffy murmured. "Well, more importantly, here _you_ are. Which, might I add, is a definite plus compared to last time."

Angel blanched slightly, and rolled off of her onto his back. "We're terrible at pillow talk, ya know that?"

"Horrible," Buffy agreed as she cuddled against him.

They were both quiet for a moment, each soaking up each other's presence. The clock on the wall was the only sound in the apartment, aside from Buffy's beating heart, which only Angel could hear. Idly, he counted the beats, each one a reassurance that she was really in his arms.

"What does this mean?" Angel asked quietly.

"Well, let's see. We're stupid, reckless, irresponsible, and completely blind to anything else but each other—most of the time at least." Buffy sighed. "I'm pretty sure those are some of the symptoms of love."

"Be serious Buffy," Angel said gently, but with an authority in his tone that Buffy had rarely heard. Angel propped himself up on his elbow, and looked at her with a subtle wisdom shining brightly in his brown eyes. It suddenly made her feel very young.

"Willow's spell worked," Buffy replied quietly, her eyes darting down to his chest as she felt a tingle of nerves cause her stomach to flop. "Your soul is here to stay…so we don't have to worry about, um, getting carried away…"

"Even if my soul's anchored, we still have problems," Angel argued softly.

"Which we've already fought about, quite thoroughly I might add," Buffy replied with an edge in her voice that said, 'I dare you to try and argue.'

"I just want you, Angel," she said seeming to caress his name. Buffy placed a hand on his cheek lovingly. "Do you love me?" she asked.

"Yes," Angel whispered. "Forever."

"Forever's good," Buffy smiled before pressing her lips to his. They kissed softly for a minute before Angel broke away.

"What about you?" Angel asked as he caressed her bare shoulder before letting his hand slide down her arm. "You still my girl?"

Buffy smiled softly. "Always." She nuzzled his neck and sighed contentedly as Angel held her close. This was right where she wanted be.

"We still have stuff to work through," Angel reminded her after a moment, breaking the silence.

"Tons," Buffy agreed. _Like avoiding each other whenever we have a problem, _she thought to herself. She debated whether or not to bring it up but decided that it would be a real mood killer.

"But we'll work through it together, right?" she asked instead.

"Right."

"Besides," Buffy attempted a half-hearted shrug. "What else could happen?"

* * *

><p><strong>Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, why did ya have to say that? You totally just jinxed it. Shame on you.<strong>

**This is when I completely go on my own little tangent! I'm really hoping you guys will like it!**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Hello, beautiful, wonderful people that make smile! This little fact is extremely important because right now, life sucks. I'm gonna just rant a little bit here, so you can just skip to the chapter if you want. However, for those of you who will actually take the time to read this, I thank you. Someone's listening! Grrr...okay, first things first. Monday sucked. My AP Bio teacher decided to conveniently forget to tell us that we had our unit test over botany. That sucked. Then, that same day, my english teacher nixed my thesis statement for my research paper. It was an AWESOME thesis, but she made me chop it in half because one half was not 'really needed.' Now, my thesis is bland and boring and uncreative and awful. Soo...you'd think Tuesday would get better right? But nooooo...I myself conveniently forgot that our AP Bio tests last two days and day two is the open response. Failed that too. Epically. It doesn't help that my teacher was absent both these days. But you know, I was like, 'I don't care' so I turned in my damn test that will earn me a wonderful F. Possibly a D if the PTB are on my side, which, right now, they are NOT. Anyway, continuing through my second day of suckiness, I went to AP Psych. I love Psych, some of my best guy friends are in there and they are absolutely hilarious. So, I laughed, felt better, and thought that maybe the day would get better. Wanna guess what happened? It got worse. I go to AP Calculus. I know we have a quiz. Known that for days now. I thought I was ready. I knew the formulas. I'm good with numbers. I get the quiz...and proceed to stare at it blankly for five minutes. We even got to work in teams because my Cal teacher is, admittedly, pretty awesome like that. This fact, however epic, just doesn't compensate for the low grade I know I got. I already have a B in there, which, I'm good with. And now our homeowrk on chain rule is due tomorrow...and I know how to do it, and yet I don't know how to do it...that's very frustrating! But...yeah...I'm running out of steam guys...thanks for listening to my pity party/ramble/rant...**

**Sooooo...back to the reason we're here right? Angel! Buffy! Got together and made with the love last chapter! Glad everyone enjoyed that. Made my day reading your reviews! This chapter sets the ball rolling with my little evil plan that Joss didn't think of. Bahahahahaha...**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Me: Okay, guys! Chop, chop, we've got a chapter!**

_**Booth: That's my line...except not my line.**_

_**Brennan: (frowns) Booth, that makes no sense.**_

_**Angel: Why do you look like me?**_

_**Buffy: (smiles) That's you in ten years, Angel. **_

**Me: Agent Studly, Bones...what are you doing here?**

_**Booth: (stares at Angel) This is weird...hey, I look pretty good, don't I Bones?**_

_**Brennan: The resemblence really is quite remarkable. **_

_**Giles: Um, can we get on with the chapter? I think this is getting out of hand...**_

**Me: (giggles) Sorry.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 9<p>

The kettle was whistling. The birds were chirping. The morning sun was shining softly through the windows of Giles' apartment. This was exactly the peaceful beginning of the day that Giles hoped for every night. Today he'd been blessed with his wish.

He took the kettle of the stove and set about making his morning tea. His eggs and toast lay waiting untouched on his plate. Giles poured himself a cup of his freshly made, steaming hot tea and sat down at his kitchen table.

Idly, he flipped through one of his many occult books that lay on the table in front of him. Giles had always found reading to be relaxing. Letting the text come to life in his mind, making it real, and seeing the pictures play out in his head. It was all a wonderfully addictive process that he never tired of.

Giles was determined to have a good day. The past few weeks…no, that wouldn't do. The past few _months_ had been hell. Short and simple. Angelus had returned with a vengeance, haunting his surrogate daughter, watching and waiting for her to break. Jenny had been killed, cruelly murdered by the person whom she had hoped to revive to his true self.

He himself had been tortured. Strapped to a hard back chair, ropes tied so tightly around his wrists that they had gone numb within seconds. After a while he'd no longer felt the sharp binding cutting into his wrists. He'd stared into the face of the vampire who his Slayer had fallen so madly in love with, a face which she had thought held so much love and compassion. Giles himself had seen it a handful of times.

But not then…no. Love and compassion had been nonexistent in that beast's eyes.

Giles just wanted to have a good day. Today, it seemed, had possibilities.

The phone rang then, its tone shrill and demanding. With a sigh, Giles rose from the table to answer it. The voice on the other end of the line startled him. It was not who he expected.

Quentin Travers.

As Quentin talked, Giles' complexion slowly paled until he'd lost virtually all color. Travers' words did not slowly sink in. No, it was like they'd been slammed into his mind with a sledge hammer. The abruptness of it all was shocking.

Nerves knotted his stomach as Quentin promptly said goodbye and hung up, not giving Giles time to return the sentiment. Numbly, Giles moved back towards the kitchen table where he half sat/half fell into his chair.

He stared at his half-eaten breakfast, suddenly feeling nauseous at the once delectable meal. Giles cursed quietly, though it did not hold half of the spark it should have. He was still too dazed to put any real feeling behind it.

Consequences. He was taught about consequences at a young age. There was a consequence for everything one did. Even the slightest thing held its own consequence. However, sometimes, when the action was not so slight, for example, like the subsequent betrayal of your organization, of your oath that you had taken and promised to uphold. The consequences were swift and severe.

Slowly, Giles brain began to work. He needed to pack. He needed to call Buffy and Joyce to tell them what was going on. Should the rest of the Scoobies know? Giles filed the thought away for later.

He needed to pack. He needed to call Buffy and Joyce. Buffy needed to pack. He needed to find Angel.

The Watchers were coming.

* * *

><p>Buffy stretched out languidly, a lazy smile on her face. The morning had gotten off to a rough start for a moment, but, well, they'd made up for that—a lot.<p>

"We have to get out of bed sometime today," Angel said as he traced random patterns across her back.

Buffy lifted her head off his chest, pouting. "Why?"

"Because, the world exists outside of the bedroom," Angel answered with a low chuckle.

"Why?" Buffy asked again, this time purposely looking as adorably pathetic as possible.

Angel just shook his head, a wry smile on his face. "You're doing that on purpose."

"Why?" Buffy repeated with a mischievous smirk.

Angel rolled so that he was on top of her. His lips found hers and they kissed slowly, savoring the taste of each other. "Mmm," Buffy murmured as he pulled away. "You know, you're good at a lot of things," she told him as Angel quirked an eyebrow. "But you kiss like a god."

"Ha, ha, funny," Angel smiled, but he couldn't resist kissing her one more time.

"I'm being serious."

"I know, that's why it's so funny," Angel grinned as Buffy playfully pushed him off her.

Buffy smiled, and tried to permanently engrain the picture she was seeing in her mind. Angel smiling, _really_ smiling…it was the care-free, happy smile that made him look like he really was twenty-six.

"You think our pillow talk has improved?" Buffy asked as she planted feather light kisses on his chest before moving up to his neck.

"Definitely," Angel answered with a chuckle.

They were both silent for a few minutes, enjoying the moment, the peace. Both of them knew that the minute they got out of bed, the real world would be waiting. Angel was still practically banished from the Scoobies. Buffy still had things to settle with her mother and with her friends, specifically Xander. Everyone had to try and move past what had happened. They had to try and start over, if such a thing were really and truly possible.

"We probably need to get up," Buffy finally sighed as she sat up in the bed, holding the covers over her chest.

She felt Angel's gentle touch on her back, and smiled. "Is this you trying to convince me to stay?" she asked.

Angel's arm suddenly wrapped around her waist, and before she knew it he was on top of her. "No," he shook his head, grinning mischievously before capturing her lips with his as his hand ran down her side and settled on her hip. They continued to kiss until Buffy had to break away to breathe.

"_That_ was me convincing you to stay," Angel whispered in her ear before beginning to kiss his way down her neck.

Buffy laughed, "And it _almost_ worked," she smirked before flipping them over so that she was straddling him. Angel chuckled as Buffy kissed her way up his chest before placing a soft, smiling kiss on his lips. "But I really gotta go," she said before climbing over him and out of the bed.

She quickly pulled on her jeans as they were closest to the bed. Buffy walked over to the lamp and picked up her bra off the shade. "How did this end up all the way over here?" she asked, turning her head to glance over her shoulder back at Angel who was grinning to himself.

"No idea."

Buffy rolled her eyes and put the garment on. "Your shirt is by the door," Angel said helpfully.

Buffy sighed and walked over to where the hastily discarded article of clothing lay, pulling it on over her head. She would never have thought that they'd be the ones to toss clothing around the room, although, now that Buffy really thought about it, she wasn't that surprised. The thought made her giggle.

When Buffy turned around, Angel was already half dressed. In fact, he was just putting his arm through his shirt sleeve. Grinning, Buffy sauntered over to him and ran her hands down his stomach lightly, enjoying the feel of his muscles tensing underneath her fingers. It thrilled her that she had just as much power over him as he had over her.

Buffy wrapped her arms around his waist and buried her face in his chest, not wanting to lose the skin to skin contact she'd grown addicted to so quickly. "Is it always like this?" she asked quietly as she felt Angel's arms wrap around her protectively.

"I don't know," Angel answered truthfully. "But I hope it is."

"Yeah," Buffy agreed. "Me too…cause this is nice. It makes me all warm and fuzzy inside."

Angel chuckled and kissed her hair before gently pulling away from her so he could button up his shirt. He noticed Buffy's slight frown, and just shook his head wryly.

"I guess I better go," Buffy said sounding disappointed at the knowledge. "Make sure Mom doesn't have a cow."

"She didn't know you were here?" Angel asked, his brows knitting together as he considered how worried her mother might be.

"I said I was going for a walk," Buffy admitted somewhat sheepishly. "I didn't think about running into you, until, well, I ran into you, and then after that I _really_ had other things on my mind."

"You need to let her know that you're alright," Angel said as he pulled her towards him, kissing her lips softly before pulling back at planting a delicate kiss on her forehead.

"You're making the whole bit about leaving seriously difficult, ya know," Buffy said dryly, hugging him tightly for a second before dropping her arms and heading towards the door while she still had the determination.

She paused as her hand touched the doorknob. Buffy looked back over her shoulder to see that Angel hadn't moved at all, simply standing there, watching her go. They still had so much to work through, but they'd tackled the big things. Well, at least, they'd gotten a start on tackling the big things. What was settled in her mind would not be settled in Angel's for a long time, Buffy knew.

"See you later," she smiled softly before opening the door and slipping out into the early morning sun.

* * *

><p>Hesitantly, Buffy opened the door of her house. Stopping in the entryway, she looked towards the living room, half-expecting her mother to be sitting on the couch waiting for her, a scold already prepared and rehearsed. However, the living room was empty.<p>

Buffy moved towards the kitchen and noticed that her mother wasn't there either. Just as she was about to head upstairs to peek into her mother's bedroom, her stomach growled loudly, reminding her that she hadn't eaten in a while.

Suddenly, the toaster popped causing Buffy to jump, startled by the noise. Joyce entered the kitchen then, a coffee cup in hand. "Oh, there you are," she said as she set the toast on a plate and sat down at the table. "I was wondering when you'd come home," she said absently. "That was quite a long walk."

Buffy sighed and dropped into the kitchen chair next to her mother, immediately recognizing the fake, blasé attitude her mom always adopted when she'd gone far beyond worried and entered the first stages of panic.

"I'm sorry," she apologized. "I was with—."

"Angel, yes," Joyce interrupted as she spread an amble amount of grape jelly on a piece of toast. "I guessed that you were with him."

"Oh, well, yeah," Buffy stammered, feeling awkward as images and feelings of her time with Angel filtered through her brain. It was definitely not something she wanted to remember at the kitchen table with her mother.

To try and divert her attention, Buffy snatched a piece of toast from her mother's plate and began to pick it apart into little pieces.

"Did you have sex?" Joyce asked suddenly, causing Buffy to choke on the piece of toast she'd just swallowed.

Buffy coughed, her eyes watering. "Um," Buffy cleared her throat. "What?"

"Buffy, I'm a woman, and although you would rather not think about it, I have had sex before," Joyce said, ignoring Buffy's cringing face. "I know that look."

"What look?" Buffy tried to think of a way to reroute the conversation to something that didn't involve her sex life. Hey, she had a sex life! The thought almost brought a smile to her face, but she quickly forced herself to be serious.

"The wide, bright eyes, the silly smile, the glow," Joyce studied her daughters face. "You and Angel had sex last night, which is why you didn't come home."

"We didn't plan it," Buffy immediately defended, knowing when she was caught. Moms—there was really nothing you could fully hide from them. "I was going for a walk. I went down to the docks, and well, Angel was there, and we, um, argued, and then we…yeah…"

"You argue a lot?" Joyce asked worriedly. "That's not good for a relationship, Buffy."

"We don't argue all that often," Buffy shrugged. "But we both have tempers and well, when we do argue—it's not pretty. We don't _fight_ or anything," Buffy said before frowning. "Well, I did punch him once."

"Buffy—," Joyce began but she was interrupted by the phone ringing. With a sigh, she got up to answer it. Buffy listened to her mother's side of the conversation.

"Oh?...Who are they?...What?...How long?...You don't know? Well what do I tell Buffy?...Angel?...I'm sure she knows where he is…okay, yes, okay, bye."

Joyce hung up the phone, looking perplexed. "What?" Buffy asked curiously.

"That was Mr. Giles," Joyce explained. "He says that you and Angel need to pack—you're going to London."

"_What?"_ Buffy repeated, wide-eyed. "Why?"

Joyce frowned. "Something about a Watcher's Council?" she offered, hoping that it would make more sense to Buffy than it did to her. "They're coming here, apparently, to talk, and then they will escort you, Mr. Giles, and Angel back to London."

Buffy's stomach dropped to her knees. This was not good. The Watchers were not good. She remembered what Kendra had said, about how Giles was so different from her Watcher. How she had no friends, how she read the handbook and knew all this supernatural stuff.

For Buffy, those circumstances did not apply. She'd never read the handbook, in fact, Giles had said that he'd tossed it. She got new rules. Buffy still lived with her mother. She still had friends, and said friends helped her with Slaying. She had Angel.

Buffy was pretty sure that was a big "no-no."

"So…" Buffy said slowly, trying to gather her thoughts and squelch the nervous panic that had settled in her stomach. "Um, what's the weather like across the Pond?"

"Pack a raincoat," Giles said as he entered the kitchen. "Do forgive me," he apologized in advance. "I let myself in. I must speak with Buffy. Well, both of you actually," he amended. "May I?" he asked, gesturing to the chair next to Buffy.

"Sure," Buffy said quickly. "Sit down Giles. Take a load off."

"If only it were that simple," Giles muttered just low enough for Buffy to hear.

"So, London, huh?" Buffy asked as Giles nodded. "Did I earn enough slayage points to earn a free trip?"

"Not exactly, no," Giles said as Joyce set down a cup of tea in front of him. "Thank you," he said gratefully, taking a sip and noting with some surprise that it was the brand he himself used.

"So then why are you, me, and Angel taking a field trip to London?" Buffy asked. "More importantly, why is Angel going at all?"

"Because," Giles sighed as he set his tea down. He took off his glasses and cleaned them on the hem of his shirt, not really caring if the action was pointless. He just needed something to do to organize his scattered thoughts.

"Because, why?" Buffy pursued, growing worried. "I mean, they don't know that he—that we're…"

"Lord no," Giles shook his head. "The Watchers are unaware that you and Angel are…together. All I've told them was that Angel was a vampire with a soul that helped you." Seeing Buffy's curious, yet still somewhat betrayed look, Giles quickly elaborated. "As a Watcher, it is my duty to report the going-ons of Sunnydale and your Slaying. I have to include what demons you face, the vampires you slay. Workout regimens, class schedules, you name it, I have a duty to put it in a report that I send monthly."

"So they know all about the Scoobies, and how I do nothing the way I'm supposed to?" Buffy asked worriedly.

"Well, um, yes," Giles confirmed. "To an extent—," he added quietly.

"Which would be?" Joyce prompted.

"As I stated before, the Watcher's are unaware of the extent of Buffy and Angel's relationship," Giles began. "However, they do know about Acathla. They have many witches and warlocks under their employ that keep up with influxes in magic—like portals to hell opening."

"They know that Angel lost his soul and opened the portal," Buffy said softly, reading in between the lines. "You told them…"

"I had no choice, Buffy," Giles said sadly. "He was not Angel. Angelus was running rampant, and that was a fact that I could not fail to report."

"So they're coming for me?" Angel asked as he tossed off the thick wool blanket that covered him.

"Angel?" Buffy asked shocked. "How'd you get in here?"

Angel looked confused for a moment. "I don't know."

Buffy looked to her mother. "Did Willow come by?"

It was like a light bulb went off over Joyce's head. "Oh, yes, she did! Not too soon after we left the meeting last night. You'd already gone. She murmured some words. I didn't understand them, but it was like the air shimmered for a moment, and then it was back to normal."

"Good thinking, Wills," Buffy said approvingly.

"So…" Angel said looking at Giles. "How much trouble are we in?"

Giles didn't even answer. He just glared at Angel.

"Lots of trouble then?" Angel assumed. "Thought so."

"Angel," Buffy called quietly, motioning wordlessly to the empty seat to her right. Angel cast a quick look towards Giles and Joyce before complying. Once he was next to Buffy, he took her hand underneath the table.

Joyce looked at the clock on the wall. "I've got to get to the gallery," she announced as she got up from the table. She turned to Buffy, "I expect to be filled in later."

"If she's not already gone," Giles interrupted quietly.

"Then I expect a note," Joyce retorted easily.

Buffy smiled slightly. "Got it. My note-taking skills are up to the challenge."

"Good," Joyce said with a tight, nervous smile as she slung her purse over her shoulder and grabbed her keys off the counter. "I love you Buffy."

"Love you too, Mom," Buffy replied quietly, but sincerely.

Joyce hesitated for a moment before turning and leaving the kitchen. They were all silent until they heard the door shut, and then Giles immediately glared at Angel.

"They're going to try and kill you," he told the vampire bluntly.

"I sorta expected that."

Giles turned his gaze to Buffy. "You'll be put on Review. It's a euphemism for trial."

"Yippie."

"And I'll probably be fired," Giles said bitterly as he stared into his now cool cup of tea.

The three of them were silent for a moment.

"Well," Buffy sighed. "I hear there's a shoe sale at the mall…"

"You can never have too many shoes," Angel agreed with her, squeezing her hand.

Buffy leaned her head against Angel's shoulder. "I've always thought so."

Giles looked at the ceiling, and closed his eyes briefly. "We're all doomed."

* * *

><p><strong>Well, there we go! The Watchers are coming, the Watchers are coming! Ah!<strong>

**Review and my day will suck a little less,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: Okay, guys, I just got to say thanks! You guys totally made my day suck less! Bravo! Thank you, thank you! Your reviews were lovely. I know life, in reality, wasn't sucking that much...but I'm a teenager, and for a teenagers standards...the past two days really sucked. lol**

**Anywho, thanks again, and here we go! I'm so excited that all of _you_ are excited about the Watchers! I am so, so, so, so anxious to see if you guys like where I'm going with this. Oh, do I have plans for our Angel and Buffy! And...well...no, I don't think I'll tell you (evil laugh)...I want it to be a surprise!**

**Today's Random Disclaimer is for Jeremy Shane :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy).**

**Buffy reads the message on the computer: Who is this Jeremy Shane?**

**Angel: I don't know...but...how does he know that?**

**Willow: He's not supposed to know! We're supposed to have our secrets!**

**Me: Uh, guys...everyone knows your secrets...you're on TV**

**Scoobies: What? **

**Buffy: Aren't there, like, laws against that sort of thing? Shouldn't we know we're being filmed?**

**Willow: Yeah! I mean...the secret life I live on another network is supposed to be secret!**

**Oz: It's a conspiracy.**

**Xander: This is just weird.**

**(Door begins to shake, and all the Scoobies look up worried)**

**Jeremy Shane: I KNOW YOUR SECRETS!**

**Buffy: RUN!**

***That probably made no sense to most of you guys, but I hope you at least cracked a smile***

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 10<p>

All was quiet in the Summers' living room. It wasn't even a comfortable silence. It was a silence that was so fraught with tension that it was suffocating. No one really made eye contact with each other, and furtive glances towards the front door were made every so often by everyone.

It was the first time that all of them...the Scoobies, Buffy, Giles and Angel had been in the same room since he'd become Angelus. Xander was glaring at anything that moved. Willow kept looking between Buffy and Angel, trying not to grin at the knowledge Buffy had so recently endowed her with. Buffy really hadn't had enough time to give her all the details, but Willow knew that her spell had worked...in all it's facets. She'd made Buffy promise to take time out for some serious girl talk when she got back.

Oz was looking more pensive than usual. Cordelia was sitting by Xander, her arms crossed over her chest, looking thoroughly disgruntled due to the fact that she was missing out at a special hour sale at the mall. Giles had already cleaned his glassed three times, and Joyce had offered drinks and snacks twice.

Buffy and Angel sat together on the loveseat. Buffy held Angel's hand in a death grip that would have surely broken a human man's bones. Sighing, Buffy leaned her head against his shoulder and rested her free hand on his bicep, hugging his arm.

An angry army of nervous butterflies fluttered relentlessly in Buffy's stomach as she waited for the Watchers to arrive. It was maddening, wondering what was going to happen. She knew it would be bad, she just didn't know exactly _how_ bad. There was only so much bad she could deal with.

The idea that the Watcher's were going to try and kill Angel did nothing to assuage her. Giles had been serious when he'd said that the Watchers would attempt to kill him. They'd talked about it. Giles had said that the Watchers would probably try to make it seem like an accident, but then he'd shrugged and said that they might just say 'to hell with it' and outright kill him without ceremony.

This didn't help Buffy's nerves.

Giles also had spoken in detail about the Review. Apparently, there were two different kinds of Reviews. The first one was a like a check-up. Talk to her friends; find out if she was doing her job right. Put her through a few tests. Done deal.

The other Review, the kind that she was going to go through, was literally a fancy word for trial—judge, jury, the whole nine yards. Without the lawyers though. You had to defend yourself. And oh joy; there was no Golden Rule that said "Innocent until proven guilty."

Buffy was thrilled.

Buffy also worried because Giles was sure he was going to get fired. Apparently, everything he'd been doing wasn't so approved of, but they'd sort of let it slide because of everything that she had done, which Buffy supposed was sort of a compliment to her. At least the recognized all that she did, right?

But it seemed like Acathla, and Angel/Angelus had broken the camel's back.

There was a knock on the door then, and everyone froze for a moment. Gathering his wits about him, Giles rose from his place on the couch and went to answer the door. Angel stood up too, but Buffy didn't let go of his hand. It was her lifeline and was keeping her sane.

"They don't know about us, Buffy," Angel whispered quickly. "I'd kinda like to keep it that way for as long as we can."

Seeing his logic, Buffy forced herself to let go of his hand. Angel retreated to the back of the room and leaned against the wall, folding his arms over his chest. It looked casual enough, but the hardness in his eyes screamed danger.

They all heard a loud greeting. "Ah, Rupert! So good to see you!"

"Quentin," Giles replied quietly. "Won't you come in?"

"Yes, yes," Quentin said quickly. "I suppose we must. We have to make this as speedy a process as possible. We have a flight to catch."

Giles led the group into the living room. Buffy and Angel immediately catalogued the new arrivals. Quentin Travers was a man in his early sixties, perhaps, obviously the leader of the group. Three men behind him were plainly muscle. There were three more Watchers, two men and one woman who were at the back of the group.

"We already made a stop to pick up Acathla," Travers informed Giles. "I must say I'm quite surprised you've left the old boy unguarded."

"It's barely been two weeks," Giles replied coldly. "And contrary to what you might think, it's quite a handful to try and locate a proper place to keep an 'old boy' like Acathla."

"Ah, you're right," Travers said lightly. "I do apologize. I forget how limited your resources are here."

Travers seemed to survey the room. His eyes landed on Angel, and he fought back a flinch at the calm, yet menacing expression on the vampire's face. "Angelus," he said, quite proud of himself that his voice sounded strong and unaffected.

"It's just Angel," Angel corrected with a small smile that probably came across as more of an 'I'm-thinking-of-ways-to-kill-you' smirk.

"Ah, yes," Travers nodded, his anxiety silently reflected in his eyes as he spoke to the vampire. "You have been re-ensoulled, so I'm told?"

"Yep," Willow answered quickly, sounding just a little too bright in her nervous. "Total permanent soulfulness."

Travers seemed to smile congenially at the redhead. "Of course. I assume congratulations are in order? A spell of that magnitude is a great feat at your age. You must be quite powerful," he said, and something in his voice caused Oz to shift closer to Willow.

"So…let's get the party started," Buffy interrupted, not liking the appraising look Travers was giving Willow any more than Oz.

"Buffy Summers," Travers smiled, turning his attention to the blonde Slayer. "I must admit I pictured you taller."

"You're not the first to tell me that," Buffy said with a small smirk, fighting the urge to glance at Angel.

Travers chuckled good-naturedly. "But alas, you are correct, Miss Summers. We must proceed." Travers motioned to the people behind him. "My friends and I would like to interview each of you individually, or in pairs if you would like. Whichever you are more comfortable with. We just want to talk. Nothing apocalyptic," he smiled amicably.

All the Scoobies were silent.

"So," Travers clapped his hands together. "Any volunteers to go first?"

* * *

><p>The Scoobies were all nervous about the interviews. Willow and Oz had been interviewed together, as Oz wouldn't let Willow out of his sight. He didn't trust any type of organization. There were too many conspiracies. They were all <em>one<em> big conspiracy, but Oz had yet to prove it substantially. Either way, he wasn't letting Willow anywhere near the weird, government supernatural creeps.

Willow had been shaking due to her nerves.

"How long have you known the Slayer?" their interviewer had asked.

"Buffy?" Willow laughed anxiously. "Oh, I've known her since her first day. I showed her the library…"

The questions had all been rather general until the matter of the Spell came up.

"You performed a Soul Restoration?" the Watcher inquired, studying his clipboard intently for a moment before looking back up at Willow. "You restored a vampire's soul permanently? Specifically the vampire Angelus?"

"Yes," Willow said, sounding firm and sure. "Angel's soul is permanent."

"You're positive?" the Watcher inquired further.

Willow fought a triumphant smile. "Absolutely."

* * *

><p>Xander and Cordelia's questions had started off generally, but the Watcher interviewing them seemed to be more intuitive than the one who'd interviewed Willow and Oz. That, or he simply showed it.<p>

"You do not seem to like Angelus," he observed. "Either of you."

"Well, he did do the whole go-evil-and-terrorize-us-thing," Cordelia replied quickly, feeling more nervous than she thought she should. "But, I mean, I like Angel when he's not evil. He's a pretty good guy, not to mention he's ridiculously good looking and has a great body. I mean seriously, have you seen those shoulders?"

"Yeah, Cordy, we got that," Xander said dully. "The guy really has the mysterious-creature-of-the-night-look going for him."

The Watcher's gaze suddenly zeroed in on Xander. So intent in his gaze, Xander started to shift uncomfortably. "You don't just not like the vampire. You hate him."

Xander began to laugh uncomfortably, feeling torn at the desire to answer truthfully and say 'yes,' or lie and say 'no' because he knew that his answer affected Angel—which in turn affected Buffy, who Xander still liked to consider one of his best friends.

"Hate's a strong word," he parried anxiously. "Look man, I don't like the guy, okay? But…" Xander swallowed all his dislike for Angel and told the truth. "But he does some good, alright? He helps us out, and he's really good in a fight. I say if he's there to watch Buffy's back when we can't, then he's not so bad a guy."

* * *

><p>Joyce and Buffy had been interviewed together.<p>

"You just recently came into the knowledge that your daughter was the Slayer?" the Watcher asked.

"Yes," Joyce said nervously. "Just two weeks ago."

"And how did you take this news?"

Joyce paused, looking down at the table guiltily. "I was—shocked. In denial I think. I could have reacted better I suppose, but we're working through it, right Buffy?"

"Totally," Buffy agreed. "We hashed it out. Everything's tight with the mother-daughter bond."

"Your friends know that you are a Slayer, also?" the Watcher asked, looking at Buffy.

"Well, yeah." Buffy wasn't going to deny it. "But I really didn't tell any of them. They just sorta found out."

"They help you with your Calling?" the Watcher pursued.

"Yes, because they want to," Buffy defended them. "If I had it my way they wouldn't, but they're my friends and they want to help me," she added softly. "They've gotten me out of a few tight spots."

The Watcher's eyes lit up. "Oh, really?"

* * *

><p>Giles and Angel were interviewed together, and considering both men could sit in silence for hours at a time, the interview wasn't going as smoothly as it could. The three Watchers that were strictly there as muscle stood behind the interviewer, each of them holding a crossbow at Angel, which he pointedly ignored.<p>

"Are you going to answer any of our questions?" the Watcher finally asked after sitting with them in silence for fifteen minutes.

"Are you actually going to consider any of our answers?" Giles retorted easily.

The Watcher didn't answer, and they continued to sit in silence for another five minutes.

"Okay, let's get this out of the way," Angel finally spoke, leaning his forearms on the table. He had to fight a smirk at how the Watcher across from them had leaned back. "I've been Angelus for the past few months. Really not my shining hour, but I still managed to almost end the world. But, Willow restored my soul and it's permanent. So, I'm going to keep on helping Buffy." Angel looked up at the Watchers with the crossbows. "And can ya not point those at me? It's not like I can't catch an arrow anyway."

The Watchers were all silent.

"Did he miss anything?" Giles questioned dryly.

* * *

><p>A little more than an hour later, Buffy, Angel, Giles and the rest of the Scoobies with the addition of Joyce were gathered in the living room. None of them had had a chance to talk about their interviews and share their answers like all of them wanted to do. Instead, they were all quiet as Travers smiled brightly at them.<p>

"Well, thank you so much for your time," he said seemingly genuine. "But," he paused to check his watch pointedly. "We are running out of time if we want to catch our flight."

"What about Angel?" Buffy asked glancing at him out of the corner of her eye. "I know its night here, but by the time we get to London—"

"It's terribly dreary and rainy at the moment in London," Travers interrupted with a smile, knowing Buffy's concern. "Angelus will be fine."

Somehow, Buffy didn't quite believe that.

They gathered their luggage and said their goodbyes. Well, Buffy said her goodbyes. Giles got a hug from Willow and waves from everyone else. Angel got a nod from Oz and a sly wink from Willow that he tried forget was due to the fact that she knew _details_. Girl talk was really an enemy at times.

The only sound on the way to the airport was the sound of the SUV's engine. Buffy rode in the back between Angel and Giles, and the tension between them was stifling. Buffy had rarely seen Angel so tense, and she was sure she'd never seen Giles glare. _Really_ glare, like borderline I'm-thinking-of-multiple-ways-to-hurt-you-glare.

And she didn't miss how both of them were angled to protect her from anything that sprung up to attack her. Why did they always worry about her? Why couldn't they worry about themselves for a change? Giles was probably going to get fired, and Angel was eventually going to have to stop his own assassination.

The silence stretched on as they arrived at LAX and boarded the plane, the Watchers own personal private jet. The only plus Buffy found in the entire arrangement was that they were in a private jet. At least she got to travel in style.

It was a little awkward for a moment when they had to take their seats. Angel and Buffy were slated to sit together, and the 'coincidence' was not lost on them. This only confirmed Angel and Giles' silent suspicions that the Watchers suspected a little something more.

Buffy chose to ignore that fact and try to remain blissfully oblivious. She took the window seat and then looked up expectantly at Angel who sighed quietly before taking his seat beside her. Both of them scanned the confined space, noting where each Watcher was. Giles was seated with Travers and they could hear Travers talking about the 'good times.' The three muscle-men Watchers were seated at strategic spots, all of them within a flying leap of Angel should a problem arise. The other three remaining Watchers were all reading, taking up the middle row. Figures.

The plane began to taxi down the runway and Angel looked just a little nervous to Buffy's eye. "First time flying?" she asked so quiet that only he would hear. Enhanced senses were so convenient.

"Yeah," Angel answered just as quietly.

Buffy grinned slyly. "Nervous?"

"No," Angel scoffed. "It's just, ya know, some things—people in particular—should stay on the ground."

"Sure," Buffy laughed lightly as they began to take off. She lounged back in her seat. "Sure."

Once they were in the air, however, Angel seemed to get used to the idea of being thousands of feet above the ground. Buffy saw him slowly begin to relax, and allowed a faint smile to grace her lips. They'd taken off on time, surprisingly, and were scheduled to arrive in London around noon once the time difference kicked in.

This left them with about six hours of time to kill.

The lights were soon shut off and pillows were handed out. Buffy took one, but she knew she probably wouldn't use it. Sleep was the last thing on her mind.

Sitting there in the dark, next to Angel, her mind couldn't help but drift to last night and the early hours of the morning. Buffy shifted in her seat slightly, and Angel noticed. He cast her a questioning look, but Buffy just shook her head and tried to think of other things.

Bunnies. Flowers. Chocolate…Angel…Bed…Kisses.

Buffy closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Angel took her hand in the darkness and it was like a shot of electricity charged the air between them. Buffy looked up at him, to find that he was already looking at her. His eyes were dark, darker than normal, and Buffy knew what that meant.

Unthinkingly, she leaned closer to him.

"We can't," Angel whispered so quietly, she could barely hear.

Buffy's mind hadn't quite traveled that far, but Angel's comment sent her mind whirling in a flurry of possibilities. "I was just going for a kiss," she breathed, keeping her voice so low that only Angel could hear her. She didn't know if everyone else was asleep. She doubted that the muscle men were sleeping. After all, they were the body guards.

"It's too risky," Angel shook his head, but he still moved closer to her. "Those three guys aren't really asleep."

"How can you tell?" Buffy whispered with a faint smile as she leaned even closer to him. They were only inches apart now.

"Their heart rate isn't slow enough," Angel answered, fighting the urge to close the tantalizingly small distance between them.

"Everyone else is asleep though, right?" Buffy whispered, unable to stop herself from glancing down at his lips.

"Mhm," Angel murmured before he couldn't resist any longer. He quickly did the math and decided that their babysitters could not clearly see them in the dark (it helped that he was wearing black).

His lips touched hers softly, and Buffy tried to keep her breathing as quiet as possible. Angel broke away far too soon for her liking, but she knew that they'd just risked enough for the moment. She'd have to take what she could get…and cherish it immensely for the next four hours.

Angel shifted in his seat slightly, positioning himself in such a way so that none of their babysitters could see Buffy clearly, and she'd be utterly invisible when she laid her head on his shoulder…which just so happened to be his plan.

He squeezed her hand to get her attention, and once her eyes were locked on his, he looked pointedly to his shoulder. Buffy smiled knowingly, immediately resting her head on his shoulder, and closing her eyes. Angel began to count her heartbeats and by the two hundred and thirty-sixth beat, he knew she was asleep.

Angel closed his eyes too, but did not allow himself the courtesy of falling asleep. He didn't trust the Watchers not to try and stake him the moment he let his guard down. Although, if the Watchers thought that just because his eyes were closed that he didn't know exactly where they were, then he didn't really have much faith in them.

Angel allowed his mind to wander. He couldn't help but wonder if this too was his fault. If he had not tried to end the world, then would the Watcher's be here? Or would they have eventually come anyway?

He also had to think about what he was going to do. Angel had no doubt that somewhere along the line of this little trip that they were going to try and kill him. It was obvious that they suspected something more in his relationship with Buffy.

Angel believed what Giles had said. He believed that Giles had not reported a word about his and Buffy's relationship to the Watchers. It was too much of a risk for Buffy, and Giles would do anything to keep Buffy out of trouble. He loved her like a daughter. It was one of the reasons that Angel respected and trusted him as much as he did.

But Angel also had an idea about the Watchers Council's train of thought. Buffy was a girl. He was Angelus, notorious for his good looks and seductive charm—among other things like torture and terror and death. The fact that he had a soul made him the perfect, stereotypical 'bad-boy-trying-to-be-good.'

It wasn't that hard for Angel to think of how Travers had put two and two together.

Angel was worried. Not for himself of course, never for himself. Buffy was his only concern. Ever since he'd first laid eyes on her, he'd known that he'd loved her and would try to protect her from anything and everything. The Watchers were a threat to Buffy, and Angel didn't like that he was very limited in what he could do to protect her.

Angel knew what kind of person Travers was. He'd lived long enough to see plenty of them. A man who'd worked hard to get where he was, but had become obsessed and greedy with the power he had obtained. He was a narcissist, believing that everyone was below him. He was a man who would do anything to prove himself right.

Angel worried at what lengths Travers would go to in order to prove his theory.

* * *

><p><strong>Well, that was fun! Didn't everyone have at least a good line? Personally, I'm a big fan of what Angel said in his interview. Giles too. And I had to give Xander a redeeming moment. I tried to make sure everyone was in the chapter and we got a little insight into them. I miss writing all the Scoobies together in the Two SidesAISHB universe, so this was fun!**

**And...oooo...Angel brooding session at the end! Ominous, ominous...**

**Reviews are like chocolate dipped strawberries,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: Oh my! I'm so glad you like where this is headed! I did think of creating a whole new big bad, but I figured, what the hell, the Watchers are already a baddie in S3 anyway...why not make them even worse? I'm sooooooooo excited to see your reactions as this little storyline progresses!**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Me: (dances) I've got a secret!**

_**Buffy: That can't be good.**_

_**Angel: Should we be scared?**_

**Me: Terrified.**

_**?: What about me?**_

**Me: Ssshhhh! You're my little secret! You can't talk!**

_**?: I hardly see that as fair...**_

**Me: News flash...life's not fair!**

_**Travers: Do forgive me, but...**_

**Me: (incredulous) How dare you be in my disclaimer! Go away! Shoo!**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 11<p>

They arrived in London and found that as the Watchers had promised, the weather was completely dreary and rainy. Not a ray of sunshine. Though this did relax Buffy somewhat, it did nothing to even begin to unknot the tangle of nerves in her stomach as they got into the waiting vehicles, which Buffy assumed would take them to the Watchers Council Headquarters.

On any other day, at any other time, Buffy would have been awed at the fantastic scenery that surrounded her. The air of history seemed palpable as they drove through London. The old, stone buildings that had been around for centuries, the cobblestone streets, the double-decker buses, the London Eye, the Houses of Parliament, the London Bridge…it was all beautiful.

On any other day, at any other time, Buffy would have asked Angel how much London had changed. If everything was still where it used to be...the stories she knew he could tell. Even if it were a time that he'd been Angelus, surely The Scourge of Europe would have enjoyed the beauty. He was greedy like that.

But as it was, Buffy barely catalogued all that she saw. Her hand practically burned with the desire to latch on to Angel's and never let go. She needed that strength he gave her, that little feeling of peace that would calm her. But she couldn't hold his hand because that could jeopardize everything.

Buffy wasn't naïve. She might rather be in denial, but she wasn't naïve. Angel sitting with her on the plane had not been an accident. The Watchers had been hoping to see something, anything that would give them a clue as to the extent of their relationship.

She knew that they wouldn't believe that Buffy had spared his life just because he had a soul. It had to be more. It was because he was shrouded in broody mystery. It was because he was Angelus, the ultimate seducer. It couldn't just be because Buffy thought he deserved to live. Well, that and the fact that she'd fallen for him the moment she'd laid eyes on him, but they couldn't know that.

The cars came to a stop then, and Buffy couldn't control an apprehensive glance at Angel. He didn't give her a reassuring smile, but he did look into her eyes and say what he couldn't out loud. It was a type of silent communication that they were perfecting, and Buffy tried to reciprocate.

_I love you, too._

Judging by the way his brown eyes shone for a moment, Angel had gotten the message.

They were led into an old building. It had two, odd-looking owl-like gargoyles perched on its roof. Under normal circumstances, Buffy would have cracked a joke about it, but not now. The moment they were safely in the building and away from the prying eyes of the pedestrians, everything changed.

Two large hands grabbed each of Buffy's arms, Giles being treated in a similar manner. The Watchers approached Angel somewhat differently. The three muscle men had him surrounded, each holding a cross, trying to back him into the corner, but Angel didn't move, seemingly unfazed by the crosses proximity.

Angel didn't like this. He was torn between wanting to do two things. The first thing he wanted to do was rip the arms off of the two men who had grabbed hold of Buffy. He was having a hard enough time as it was not vamping out, and he couldn't help the low, steady growl that emanated from his throat.

The next thing he wanted to do was beat the living hell out of the three guys in front of him. He hated that he had to go quietly. It was the only rational thing to do, no matter how little a difference he thought it would make. The Watchers already thought what they did of him. Nothing he said or did would change that...

So, under that thought, Angel decided that he _wasn't_ going to go quietly.

His fist connected with one of the cross-wielding Watcher's jaw, sending him flying back. Immediately, the other two Watchers rushed at him, and Angel couldn't fight the innate urge to retreat away from the holy object. However, when he was almost backed against the wall he refused to retreat further and kicked a cross out of the Watcher's hands, and then promptly punched him twice in the face.

He could hear Buffy screaming at him, but he ignored her. One Watcher caught his arm and tried to pin it behind him, but Angel simply flipped him over his shoulder. Seeing all three Watchers on the ground in front of him, grimacing in pain, Angel almost allowed himself to smile.

Angel looked up as the sound of many sets of hurried footsteps echoed down the hall. A dozen or so Watchers surrounded him, and Angel raised his hands in front of him, placating. "Relax, I feel better now."

"He broke my nose," a Watcher complained quietly, as he got to his feet.

Angel smirked. _You're lucky that's all I broke._

A female Watcher stepped forward and Angel's eyes were immediately on her. The Watchers were assuming that he wouldn't attack a woman, especially a woman who looked like she couldn't throw a punch to save her life.

Angel hated that they were right.

The woman held a pair of shiny, metal handcuffs in her hands. Angel sighed, accepting defeat as one of the Watchers nearest him turned him around and slammed him roughly into the wall. He felt the cuffs click into place, and then he immediately winced as he realized that the metal was laced with silver.

"I've got to get me a pair of these," Angel murmured sarcastically to himself, vaguely wondering what Buffy's reaction would be.

"Shut up," one of the Watchers barked before grabbing his bicep and spinning him back around. Three more Watchers came forward, two of them taking hold of his right arm, while the third gripped his left in a strong grip (for a human anyway).

They led him in front of Buffy, and Angel forced himself not to look at her. That would be a dead giveaway, because he knew he couldn't hide his expression if he looked into her green eyes and saw the would-be tears that he knew were there.

He did allow himself to glance at Giles, who was regarding him stoically. It occurred to Angel that the Watcher probably knew where they were taking him. A warning flashed in Giles' eye for just a second, but it was long enough for Angel to know that wherever they were taking him it wasn't good.

Buffy couldn't tear her eyes off Angel as they led him away. She fought back the moisture in her eyes, knowing that tears wouldn't do any good. Smoke was steadily rising off Angel's wrists where the cuffs touched his skin, and Buffy knew that he was in pain, even if he didn't show it.

When he'd started fighting the Watchers she'd been surprised, but that had quickly escalated into worry. What if they just killed him then? She'd shouted at him to stop, but he had ignored her. Admittedly, in the back of her mind, she felt a small sense of satisfaction that he'd landed a few punches, but that feeling was overshadowed by her anger and worry.

What was he thinking? Attacking the Watchers? It really didn't say "I'm a good guy." Although, Buffy doubted that the Watchers would change their opinion of Angel. To them he was just another vampire, and one that she'd failed to dust.

But why would they keep him alive? Buffy would have asked Giles, but they were surrounded by Watchers. It wasn't the right time. Suddenly, the Watchers who gripped her arms began to pull her away.

"Giles," Buffy began worriedly.

"Just go with them, Buffy," Giles said calmly. "Don't fight them."

Buffy frowned, but did as Giles said and let the Watchers lead her away. They walked down a hallway, then out across a grassy quad. As they were walking, Buffy half-expected to hear a robotic voice yell for them to get off the grass, and then shout the same message in many different languages. At least it would have provided a much needed, tension releasing laugh.

Yet no sound came, just the slight squish of the soft, wet grass under their feet.

Crossing the quad, they led her down another hallway that was dimly lit, yet it held a very antique-y atmosphere. The stone floor and walls, the occasional stain glass window, Buffy wondered if this was what it was like to be in a castle.

They stopped at a large, thick wooden door, and one of the Watchers produced a large skeleton key, stuck it into the lock and turned it. A loud click seemed to reverberate down the hall, and the door creaked as it was swung open.

The shoved her in none too gently and then promptly slammed the door behind her.

Buffy felt tears spring into her eyes as she took in the room. It was the bare minimum. There as a small bed, a table and chairs, and a whole stock of candles. A fire burned in the fireplace, and that was her only source of light. There were no windows, which meant no means of escape. The walls and floor were made of stone, which also meant no escape unless she wanted to dig her way out, and Buffy didn't know if it would even be worth it. She had no idea about the layout of the building. She was trapped.

Furious, Buffy punched the door, but instead of splintering the wood and feeling her fist go through the door, she yelped and immediately cradled her hand against her chest as a shiny, modulating force field appeared in front of her door.

That was the last straw, and Buffy could not hold back her tears any longer.

* * *

><p>Giles glared unrelentingly at Travers who sat behind his large, ostentatious, mahogany desk. The man, who Giles had once considered a friend, was smiling serenely back at him, unfazed.<p>

"Where did you take her?" Giles asked flatly.

"To a holding area, completely escape proof," Travers answered calmly. "Now, I know what you're thinking Rupert, and believe when I say that we are not the enemy."

"Really?" Giles scoffed. "How blind do you think I am?"

"Blind enough to care too much," Travers returned easily, but with a steely gaze that warned Giles to calm down.

"Yes, I care about my job," Giles retorted. "Strange."

"I think you care a tad too much," Travers replied. He picked up a report from his desk, and Giles immediately recognized it as one of his own. "I was going to save this for the trial, because I'm a fair man. We have trials. You can defend yourself and your decisions."

"You're the judge," Giles pointed out. "I hardly think this counts as fair."

"Ah, but life's not fair my friend," Travers said as he flipped open the report. He pretended to be reading it, but Giles knew that Travers had probably memorized it. "It says here that Buffy defeated the Judge, is that correct?"

"Yes."

"With a rocket launcher?" Travers pursued.

Giles couldn't help the small quirk of his lips. "Yes."

"Impressive, I must admit," Travers conceded, pretending again to look over the file. "Miss Summers is quite impressive. I'm already considering her foe for the Cruciamentum."

Giles felt his face pale at Travers words. "It is eight months until her eighteenth birthday," he pointed out quietly.

Travers smiled. "You can never really plan too far ahead for these things," he said. "I've already got a few candidates lined up. No ordinary vampire will do for Miss Summers."

"Is this what you brought me here to talk about?" Giles asked clipped. "Because if it is I'm afraid I do not want to hear it."

"No, Rupert," Travers sighed as he rose from his chair. "You're here because you're my friend, and I wish to impart some advice."

"Which would be?" Giles prompted coldly.

"I like you Rupert, I really do," Travers began and Giles fought the urge to roll his eyes. "You're smart, smarter than most of the Watchers that go through the academy. You're quick with your knowledge and know how to use it. I've always admired that. But most of all, I've always respected your loyalty."

"Loyalty is what binds us all together," Travers continued, a dangerous glint in his eye. "We're all one big chain. Each of us is a link…but if a certain link, uh, weakens or breaks…the whole chain suffers," Travers' gaze met Giles. "Loyalty and Intelligence are Watchers greatest strengths. I know you have the latter, however it is the former I worry about."

"You're point being?" Giles inquired flatly.

"Find where your loyalties truly lie," Travers advised. "If you're with us, well, then I'm sure we can find a place for you here. If you choose your charge, well…" he trailed off pointedly.

"Buffy is not some tool or...or weapon that is yours to control!" Giles whispered heatedly. "She's a seventeen year old girl who is still trying to find her way through life and discover who she truly is. I will not have you belittle her into anything less than the hero she is."

"I see you've made your decision," Travers said, sounding grave. "So be it."

Two Watchers entered the office then, and each of them took one of Giles' arms. "Escort him to his old quarters," Travers ordered. "We've since given them to one of our researchers. I have high hopes for him. He's bright, maybe as bright as you, Rupert. Perhaps he will be able to enlighten you."

Giles glared at Travers as the Watchers led him away. "I know the way," Giles said as they escorted him down the familiar halls. "I promise I won't get lost."

The Watchers didn't answer him, and Giles brooded in silence.

They finally reached the door to his old quarters, and the Watchers knocked.

"Enter," a male voice said from the inside, and one of the men opened the door and led Giles in.

Giles immediately searched for the man who had turned his quarters upside down. Everything was rearranged. His bookcases that had been on the north wall were now on the south wall. The bed had been angled to face the east window, and his desk was in front of the west wall.

A young man was hunched over the desk, aged parchment from a scroll scattered about, littering the surface. Five books lay open, the young man flicking his gaze to each one of them in turn before writing his translations on a legal pad.

The Watchers left him, and shut the door. Giles waited to be acknowledged, but when it seemed like the man was going to ignore him, Giles cleared his throat to get the man's attention.

"Just a minute," the man entreated, writing furiously. "I cannot lose this particular train of thought."

He wrote for another minute or so until he sighed, took off his glasses, and rose from his chair. "Ah, you must be Rupert Giles," he smiled, holding out his hand. "Wesley Wyndam-Pryce."

* * *

><p>Angel didn't know how long they'd been going down stairs. They were old, stone stairs that were uneven which occasionally caused Angel to slip. It didn't help that he could smell his burning flesh from the silver handcuffs. The faint sizzle was the only sound aside from their echoing footsteps or the dreary, <em>drip<em>, _drip_ of the water that escaped from the ceiling.

They were underground, Angel could tell. It was cold and dank and just plain dungeon-y. Finally, the stairs ended and Angel immediately smelled the scents of many vampires. Cells lined either side of the hall, outfitted with silver bars and crosses to ensure that the vampires trapped within stayed that way.

The Watchers pushed him forward roughly, and Angel ignored the looks and whispers he was getting.

"_Angelus!"_

"_It's Angelus!"_

"_How'd he get caught?"_

"_Where's Darla?"_

"_Angelus! I'll kill you if I get out of here!"_

"_I haven't heard of him in a century!"_

"_Angelus! Looking as handsome as ever…"_

"_Oh, Angelus! Remember me? Italy? 1865? That hotel in Rome…"_

"_Angelus…"_

"_Angelus…"_

It was all very annoying, and somewhat embarrassing considering as he walked to the final cell on the row, he'd been propositioned eleven times (twice by men), asked for an autograph (Angel was sure the vamp was turned in the 60s), and then he'd received eight death threats. He'd always been popular.

When they came to what he assumed was his cell, he found that it was completely full of chained, starving vampires, probably around eight in all. This wasn't good. Starving vampires were known to feed off other vampires, and judging by the amount of dust that covered the dungeon floor, Angel figured that a few vamps had already been voted off the island.

The cuffs around his wrists suddenly were off, and then he was shoved into the cell. Heavy chains were slapped onto his wrists like all the others, and Angel looked at the dusty floor again.

"Little dusty for my tastes," he said dryly.

"Eh, sometimes one or two might get the motivation to break their chains," one Watcher shrugged with a small, cruel smile before slamming the door of the cell shut.

All the vamps immediately morphed into their game-faces if they hadn't been there already and eyed him hungrily...and not in the way Angel was used to. The vampires began to pull at their chains, growling like starved dogs.

"So," Angel said as the vamps continued to struggle. "I'm guessing you're the welcoming committee?"

The vampires all growled at him in answer and Angel cursed when suddenly there were many loud cracks as the vampire's chains snapped.

* * *

><p><strong>Yes. Yes I did. I left you with not one, but TWO cliffhangers. Oh, I'm so evil! (cackles with manical laughter)<strong>

**Wasn't Giles just epic in this chapter? I wanted him to have a shining awesome-y Giles moment, and did he ever put Travers in his place! That scene was so fun to write!**

**And yes, Wesley is coming into this story early my doves! Yes, yes, yes! I love me some Wesley.**

**Let's not forget Angel! Ah! I guess we can picture what happens next chapter...it's epic...**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Thank you, thank you for all of your reviews! I cherish each one of them! They make me all giggly and giddy with glee! Okay, so this chapter is tons of fun...well, depending on your definition of fun. :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Wesley: What is the purpose of this disclaimer?**_

**Me: Uh, my lame attempt at entertainment?**

_**Buffy: I think it's kinda neat...wigs me out a little, but it's neat.**_

_**Angel: (fighting) Yeah, but why am I always fighting? (ducks a punch)**_

**Me: Because you look even sexier when fighting.**

**_Buffy: (smiles) Yeah..._**

_**Wesley: I feel uncomfortable in this conversation.**_

_**Giles: Get used to it.**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 12<p>

Two vampires immediately latched onto him, one sinking its fangs into Angel's shoulder, while the other made a leap for his neck. Angel growled sharply, and pulled at the chains, feeling them snap after a few seconds. The sound of snapping chains and vicious growls were the only sounds heard throughout the dungeon and all the vampires present listened eagerly.

Now that he was free, Angel got his arm up in time so that the leaping vampire sank it's fangs into his arm instead of his neck. The vampire tried to hold him in place, shoving him against the wall. Another vampire grabbed the vamp that had its fangs in Angel's arm and yanked him away, causing the vamp to rake it's claw-like hand down Angel's chest as he tried to hold on to his meal. Angel ignored the pain and used his now free arm to rip the other vampire's teeth from his shoulder, ignoring how it tore his flesh and how his borrowed blood ran down his arm. One thing to his advantage was that these vampires were, in fact, starving. They couldn't coordinate an attack. They were just fighting for survival.

Four of the vamps had already turned on each other and were growling and snarling and rolling around on the floor, punching and kicking and biting and flailing. This left Angel with only four vamps to deal with, which was much easier.

Angel dealt a wicked left hook to one vamp's jaw, sending him flying into the opposite wall. Another vamp leapt at him, but Angel quickly had him in a headlock before giving his head a violent twist, snapping the vamp's neck. However, during this time, the two remaning vampires had jumped him. One on his back and the other hand sunk it's fangs into his other arm.

Angel flipped the vampire off his back, subsequently causing the vamp that had a hold of his arm to let go as he was squished under the falling vamp. A fist connected with his face and Angel's head snapped to the side as another vamp who had previously been fighting one of the other four descended upon him, snarling deliriously with hunger.

Angel backhanded him, sending him flying back into a vamp that had just picked itself off the floor. Angel did a quick mental tally and saw that there were only five vamps remaining. A vampire ripped another's head off and Angel changed his tally. Four vamps remaining.

They all sprung at him, and Angel defended himself as best he could. His normal combinations were useless as they would only work for an opponent who could think coherently. This fight was more like the tavern brawls he always got into when he was human...hit anything that moved.

Angel was pushed back against the stone wall and there was a loud crack as his head connected with the solid surface. He blinked back stars and punched the vampire responsible before growling and throwing him into the others. This caused two of the vamps to turn on each other, and left Angel with only one opponent.

It was a welcome change, and Angel quickly snapped the vamp's neck and tore his head off, leaving him as nothing but new dust on the already dusty floor. Angel spun, ready for another attack, but none came. He looked to see that of the three remaining vamps, two were fighting each other and the third was feeding on the first vamp whose neck Angel had broken.

Angel sighed, pulling the vamp off the for all intents and purposes dead vampire, quickly detaching his head from his body. He did the same to the vampire lying motionless on the floor, before returning his attention to the two vampires who'd been fighting each other.

One, apparently, had lost, which left Angel with one final foe.

The vampire leapt at him, but Angel simply grabbed his outstretched arm, used his momentum against him, and swung him face-first into the stone wall. The vampire's face crunched on impact and Angel didn't waste any time in disposing of the creature.

It was silent in the cell except for Angel's unnecessary labored breathing. He was shaking with exhaustion and blood loss from his wounds. His shirt looked like it'd gone through a shredder, but he was still standing victorious.

"Oi!" a vampire called from his cell. "Did ya win mate?"

Angel just growled sharply in answer, causing the dungeon to erupt into a noisy chatter.

* * *

><p>Giles stared at Wesley's proffered hand for a moment, before deciding to shake it. "I wish I could say that it was nice to meet you," he said as he let his hand drop and looked around the room once more. "You've completely gone your own way with my quarters, I see."<p>

"Yes, _my_ quarters, are somewhat different from yours," Wesley replied pointedly emphasizing the pronoun. "I found this more to my liking."

"So I see," Giles said as he took a seat on the end of the neatly made bed.

Wesley tried to control himself. He prided himself on being a proper Watcher. He hoped to go into the field one day, to be in charge of a Slayer like Mr. Giles was. However, he would do things differently. He would adhere to the strict Watcher code. It was why they had a handbook after all.

The rumors circulating around the Council about Mr. Giles and the goings-on in Sunnydale interested Wesley greatly and his curious nature burned with a desire know the truth.

"Is it true that you completely disregarded the handbook?" Wesley inquired, unable to stop himself.

Giles raised his eyebrows slightly. "Yes."

"Why?" Wesley pursued intently. "The purpose of the handbook is to guide the Slayer accordingly. That's how it's always been for centuries, since the founding of the Watchers. Surely, you would not completely disregard it?"

"Buffy is different," Giles replied simply.

"I would imagine all Slayers are the same," Wesley disagreed lightly, with a naiveté in his tone due to the fact that he lacked experience in the field. "They all have superior strength, enhanced senses, the ability to do what we as Watchers cannot."

"And I've found that over time the Council has forgotten that they are all young girls," Giles stated plainly. "They have feelings. They're trying to find out who they are as a person, not just as the Slayer."

"Obviously, she would see that it's her duty to protect the world," Wesley said with a curious tilt to his head. This was interesting. It was obvious that Mr. Giles cared for his charge for more than was appropriate. Wesley imagined this was what a father's love looked like.

"Of course she does," Giles retorted heatedly. "And she does her job! She's already died once doing so, and I have no doubt that she wouldn't hesitate to sacrifice herself again."

"It's her duty," Wesley stated. "Of course she would."

"It's her _life_," Giles retorted fiercely. "Buffy is not some weapon under the Watcher's control to use as they please. She's a human being with feelings. She's a normal girl. She wants friends, she wants to go shopping, she wants to find romance…she just wants to find her place in this world."

"You care for her," Wesley voiced his observation.

"Of course," Giles replied. "What person who claimed to have a heart wouldn't?"

"What about Angelus?" Wesley asked suddenly.

"What about him?" Giles asked as his eyes narrowed dangerously.

"Well," Wesley hesiatated, regretting the question, and even more so the morbid curiosty that prompted it. "Is he—was he—was he as evil as they say?"

"Worse."

"Then why didn't the Slayer kill him?" Wesley asked completely confused.

"She almost did," Giles answered. "However, Willow, Buffy's best friend, restored his soul, permanently."

"And yet you still…" Wesley couldn't finish, as his mind couldn't wrap around the fact that a Slayer had let a vampire live. "She still allowed him to live? After all that he'd done?"

"Yes."

"Why?" Wesley asked curiously.

Giles considered the question. He knew exactly why Buffy had let Angel live, and it wasn't something he was going to tell this boy who wore far too much tweed. Briefly, Giles recalled what Travers had said. This Wesley Wyndam-Pryce did have a fair amount of potential. He was curious, almost annoyingly so, but he was naïve in believing that if the books told him something then it was irrevocably true.

"Because she has a heart," Giles finally answered.

Stumped by Giles words, Wesley turned back to his translations. "I hear you're good with translations?"

Giles recognized the subtle peace offering and took it. "I've done a few in my day," he allowed.

"Could you look at this?" Wesley asked. "I would appreciate your opinion."

Giles stood and walked over to the desk, peering over Wesley's shoulder. His eyes widened as he examined the scrolls closely. "Good Lord, where did you get this?"

"Ah, the Council was lucky with this one," Wesley sighed. "We just managed to come along a text that said that there were two copies of these scrolls made. One copy, the duplicate, is held in a secure fault in Los Angeles by a particular law firm that the Council likes to avoid crossing blades with."

"Law firm?" Giles raised his eyebrows questioningly. "Surely, you're joking?"

"Not at all," Wesley shook his head. "I don't know details. In fact, that's the sum of my knowledge. A law firm in Los Angeles."

Giles' attention returned to the ancient scrolls on the desk. "So this…this is the original copy of the Prophecies of Aberjian?"

"Yes," Wesley answered. "Thought lost for centuries. Nearly 4,000 years old and in nearly fourteen different languages, some of them not even human. It's been a bloody mess to translate."

"Well, this looks to be ancient Aramaic if I'm not mistaken," Giles said as he studied the text intently.

"You're correct," Wesley nodded. "I haven't translated much; I only just got my hands on them early this morning. Had to wrestle them from O'Connor but it was worth it," Wesley muttered as he rubbed his aching shoulder absently. "Bloke has a tight hold…"

"You're asking for my assistance?" Giles asked as he continued to study the scrolls. Despite the circumstances, he couldn't help the little bubble of excitement at the sight of the ancient document.

"If I get in a rut, yes," Wesley sighed, taking off his glasses and rubbing his eyes. "But I'm afraid I'll have to put them up for now. I'm starting to see double."

"I know the feeling," Giles murmured to himself before retreating back to the bed with a deep sigh.

Wesley appraised the older man in front of him. Rupert Giles was known throughout the academy as one of the most accomplished Watchers. He'd been trusted enough to be sent to a Hellmouth to look after a prophesied Slayer. Not just anyone would be appointed such a task.

However, Wesley hadn't been prepared for how the man wore his metaphorical heart on his sleeve, well, at least when it came to his charge. Miss Summers had been creating quite a stir, and now with what Giles had said about her, how he'd defended her with a passion that went beyond a mentor to his student…Wesley was curious to see what was so special about Buffy Summers.

"Excuse me, but I must leave," Wesley said abruptly, deciding his course of action. "Please, make yourself comfortable. You will have a long day tomorrow."

* * *

><p>Buffy sat on her little pathetic excuse for a bed. Really, it was more of a cot, but Buffy wasn't all about technicalities right now. No, right now she had other things on her mind aside from the bedding.<p>

Angel.

Where was he? Was he alright? Similar questions raced through her mind, and it was nearly driving Buffy insane because she didn't know the answers. She knew he could be dust.

The thought terrified her.

And Giles? Where was Giles? Was he okay?

Buffy hated not knowing anything. She'd tried to get through the door, but there was no getting through the force field around it. She briefly entertained the idea of tunneling her way out, but she realized that she had absolutely nothing strong enough to carve away at the stone, and she wasn't about to break her knuckles trying to punch through it.

So Buffy had spent the past however many hours sitting in front of the fireplace and staring into the flames. A knock sounded on the door, and Buffy's head jerked up towards the sound. Immediately, she got up and put her back flat against the wall to the left of the door, waiting for it to open.

It swung wide, and Buffy took her chance.

Except, apparently, the force field was still in place.

"Ah, I'm afraid that won't work," the man said, and Buffy immediately appraised him.

He was wearing a brown tweed suit and a cream colored button down shirt with a brown tie. Thin, wire-rimmed glasses rested on the bridge of his nose. His hair was combed exactly, the part on the side a straight line.

"Who are you?" Buffy asked suspiciously, just now eyeing the plate of food that he held.

"Wesley Wyndam-Pryce," he answered properly. "I would shake your hand, but I'm afraid my hands are full with your dinner."

Wesley stepped into the room, not caring that they door was left open. He set the tray on the table and looked back to see that the Slayer was staring out into the hallway wistfully.

"You see, I can come in," Wesley explained. "But once you're in, you can't get out."

"So I'm stuck with you, British boy?" Buffy asked, not sounding too thrilled.

"No," Wesley shook his head, ignoring the insult. "One of my friends will come and allow me safe passage out."

"Must be nice to have those," Buffy said dully as she sat down at the table. "Friends," she elaborated, seeing his confused look.

"Mr. Giles made it seem as though you did have friends," Wesley replied, causing Buffy to look up at him sharply.

"You've seen Giles?" Buffy asked anxiously. "Is he okay? Where is he?"

"He's sharing my quarters with me," Wesley explained, his interest renewed at the girl's obvious concern.

"And he's alright?" Buffy pressed.

"A little stressed, but alright," Wesley answered, and Buffy relaxed slightly.

"Good," she said as she lifted the top off the tray. She stared at the steaming pile of food, her mouth watering as she was reminded of how long ago it was that she'd eaten.

"It's not poisoned," Wesley said, seeing her hesitation.

"Why should I trust you?" Buffy asked, her eyes narrowing.

"Why should you—," Wesley repeated confused and incredulous. "I give you my word as a Watcher that the food is not poisoned!"

"Uh huh," Buffy looked him up and down. "So why should I trust you?"

"Have you no faith in the Watchers?" Wesley asked affronted.

"Not much," Buffy said truthfully. "Giles is the exception."

"What reason do you have for being so wary?" Wesley questioned.

"Oh, gee, I don't know," Buffy said angrily. "Maybe it's because they came into my house, interviewed all my friends, and practically ordered me to come with them to London. I walk in the doors and I'm treated like a dangerous prisoner. I'm thrown in here, which is nothing more than a dressed up prison cell, waiting to be ripped a new one by a bunch of old guys that wouldn't know the sharp end of a sword if it poked them in the—"

"Yes, yes," Wesley quickly interrupted. "I can see how you might, be, um, hostile."

"Hostile?" Buffy repeated raising her eyebrows. "Oh, you haven't seen hostile."

"Angry," Wesley amended somewhat nervously as Buffy advanced on him.

"Do you know where they took Angel?"

"Who?" Wesley's brow furrowed. "Oh, you mean Angelus?"

"No, I mean Angel," Buffy shook her head. "He's not Angelus."

"He _was_ not too long ago," Wesley pointed out. "Honestly, I don't understand you."

"What's not to get?" Buffy asked confused. "I'm an open book."

"Why didn't you kill Angelus—"

"—Angel"

"—in the first place," Wesley finished. "It is your duty to vanquish demons."

"He has a soul," Buffy argued firmly. "He's not evil."

"But he was only a short while ago and you didn't kill him," Wesley pursued curious as to what motivated this odd Slayer.

"He's my friend," Buffy answered. It was the biggest understatement in the world, but it was true. "Have you ever tried to kill a friend? Someone who saved your life more times than you've saved his?"

"Why would he save you?" Wesley asked, utterly confused by this girl, her Watcher, and now the vampire Angelus. "You're a Vampire Slayer and he is a vampire. That seems like a lot to overcome in a friendship."

"He has a soul," Buffy repeated, like it made all the difference in the world.

"But he's still a demon," Wesley argued bewildered and unable to comprehend Buffy's logic.

Buffy shook her head and sat down at the table, beginning to pick at her food. "You need to get your nose out of those old, smelly books and wake up and smell the tea, Wes." Buffy didn't look up from her food. "You're friend is here," she said hearing the man's footsteps.

Wesley turned and noted with some surprise that she was right. He wasn't aware of how much time had passed. "Oh, yes, I see you're right."

"It's been known to happen."

"Yes, well," Wesley stammered, completely confused, yet fascinated by the girl in front of him.

She was nothing like he'd imagined. It was odd. It was like she was just a normal girl. There was nothing that screamed warrior about her. She was small and slender. She had shoulder length blonde hair that he imagined was cut in a very fashionable style. Bright, seemingly innocent green eyes shone with youth, but at the same time hinted at a developing, premature wisdom, which came from experiencing too much in life too quickly.

"You're friend is waiting," Buffy pointed out.

"Right," Wesley said glancing at his friend, who nodded. Wesley walked through the doorway, passing through the barrier. He turned around and saw that Buffy was staring after him, a contemplative look on her face. "It was…enlightening to talk to you," Wesley said honestly. "The Review is scheduled to begin tomorrow," he told her. "I suggest you get some sleep."

"Eh, night time is party time for me," Buffy smiled faintly, though Wesley could see clearly the undisguised worry in the Slayer's eyes. "But ya never know; I might catch a few Z's."

Wesley couldn't think of a response, so he just nodded and shut the door. Richardson, the man who'd let him through the barrier, looked at the door curiously.

"She's an odd one," he said. "I'm surprised she's still alive. Not what a Slayer's supposed to be at all."

Wesley considered that. _Perhaps that's why she __**is**__ still alive, _he thought to himself.

However, he did not say that out loud. "No, I suppose not," he said lamely.

"Well, goodnight," Richardson said. "Lots to do tomorrow," he added before walking off down the hall.

Wesley went the opposite direction, thinking along the same lines. Yes, there was a lot to do tomorrow, for most of the Watchers at least. Wesley was nothing but a researcher, so all he'd planned on doing tomorrow was translating more from the Scrolls of Aberjian. Now, Wesley had a new plan.

He needed to talk with Angelus. Mr. Giles had defended the vampire, or rather, he'd defended Buffy who had defended Angelus. _Angel_. Wesley corrected in his head. They both referred to him as Angel.

Wesley wondered how he'd convince Travers to let him speak with _Angel_.

* * *

><p><strong>Yes, I'm bringing in the Scrolls early...they're important and I need them for my little plan...<strong>

**Woo! Go, Wes! He's so adorable in his young, naive character arc! Of course, now I get to go write the Wes who slays demons and wears leather...**

**That's right people! I've written three chapters of the sequel to AISHB...and It. Is. Awesome. And I wrote a particular scene that just has me dancing in excitement! So freaking excited! Don't all of you wanna guess what it is? :D**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Wow, I can't believe we're already in Chapter 13! Ah! It feels like I've barely started this story, and we're already this far into it! Your reviews are all amazing, and I love all of you. Again, I'm not replying to reviews at the moment because I simply don't have the time anymore; however, that doesn't mean I don't read and cherish every single one of your reviews! **

**On that note, some of you wondered last chapter if I purposely gave Wes the line about a 'father's love.' The answer is yes, I did do that on purpose. (Insert sympathetic sigh here). Yes, poor Wes...he's just so...Wes-like...adorable, awkward, smart, and then stupid at the same time. Well, at least this Wes is. Angel S3 Wes is just a _little_ different. lol**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy).**

**Me: Oh, here we go guys!**

_**Buffy: What?**_

**Me: It's time for the Review!**

_**Buffy: (frowns) Why are you so excited? This is a bad thing.**_

**Me: Yeah, I know...but I have to make you go through really bad things to make you appreciate the really good things.**

**_Giles: That is awful logic_.**

**Me: ...And? It makes for a good story...I hope.**

_**Angel: What about me? What am I supposed to do? **_

**Me: Um...why don't you sing?**

_**Angel: That's really not a good idea.**_

**Me: It's okay, I'll teach you a song that's meant to be sung badly! Ready? (takes a deep breath) F is for friends who do stuff together! U is for you and me! N is for anywhere at anytime at all-**

_**Scoobies: STOP!**__**...**_

_***While off in a corner, one lone voice was heard (Wesley)* Down here in the deep blue sea!**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 13<p>

Buffy awoke sore and groggy. With a groan, she sat up in bed and rubbed her eyes tiredly. It had taken hours of tossing and turning before Buffy had finally fallen asleep. She didn't know if it was her nerves that had kept her awake or the fact that she'd fallen asleep in Angel's arms last night.

Buffy thought it was probably both.

The limited knowledge she had of Angel's whereabouts troubled her greatly. After Wesley had left, she'd realized that he'd never told her where Angel was or if he was alright. Fifteen minutes of self-directed cursing and glaring into the fire later, she'd made herself sit down and eat the food that Wesley had brought her.

Since she was still alive, Buffy guessed that it hadn't been poisoned.

The door to her cell, at least that's what it was in Buffy's mind, thudded with the sound of a knock and then it swung open. Wesley stood there, yet again, and Buffy was surprised at the slight gratefulness she felt at seeing the only recently familiar face.

"What's crackin' Wes?" Buffy asked as she ran her fingers through her hair, trying to brush it out.

"I thought you might like a shower," Wesley explained his presence. "Before breakfast and the Review."

Buffy brightened slightly at the thought. "That sounds nice," she said going over to the corner and tossing a change of clothes and other necessities in her small carry-on bag. Angel's bag was right next to hers, another fact that caused Buffy to worry.

When she turned around she saw that two more Watchers had shown up. Buffy walked right up to the door, and experimentally poked her finger through the force field. She felt a little tingly sensation, but she passed through the barrier easily.

Buffy eyed the two extra guys and then looked at Wesley. "Not afraid of me, are you Wes?"

"Why do you insist on calling me that?" Wesley asked somewhat annoyed.

Buffy shrugged as she began walking beside him. "Dunno…I guess I just don't like the time it takes to say Wesley."

"It's only two syallables!" Wesley said irritated.

"And Wes is only one," Buffy returned easily. "Hey, my time is limited. I try and make things simple, Wes."

Wesley gave up with a sigh, something telling him that he would never quite win an argument with this Slayer.

"How's Giles?" Buffy asked after a moment of silence. "He gets really cranky in the morning if he doesn't have an old dusty book and a cup of tea."

"When I left him, he was translating something for me," Wesley informed her. "We're both sort of working on it."

"Ooo, bet he's loving that," Buffy said with a smile. "I wonder how many times he's cleaned his glasses."

Wesley's brow furrowed unable to decide if she was being sarcastic to serious.

"I say that with love," Buffy enlightened him, seeing his expression.

"You care a great deal about him," Wesley said as they came to a stop outside the door that led to the women's showers.

"Well, yeah," Buffy shrugged, but Wesley could easily see the seriousness in her eyes. "It's like I told my Mom. Giles is my Yoda, and I'm like Luke Skywalker except with better hair and instead of a light saber I have a stake."

"We'll be out here," Wesley said still trying to decipher the blonde Slayer in front of him.

"Great," Buffy with a small smile before opening the door and quickly shutting it behind her.

For a moment, she let herself enjoy her new surroundings. She was going crazy being cooped up in her little prison and she hadn't even been there for a full twenty-four hours. This new room was a lot like a locker room, with a whole row of shower stalls going down the middle. Buffy went to the last one and turned on the water as hot as it would go.

Buffy quickly discarded her clothes and stepped under the spray. She let the hot water run over her for a moment, almost as if it were washing away her worry. If only it were that simple. Truthfully, Buffy had never been so nervous.

It didn't help at all that in situations like this, she'd go to Angel. Sadly, this wasn't exactly one of her options. With a sigh, Buffy got to business, scrubbing herself clean and washing her hair. She was out in ten minutes, a record for her.

"Have fun standing out here staring at nothing?" Buffy asked as she opened the door to see Wesley's gaze fixed on the opposite stone wall.

"Actually," Wesley said as they started walking back to her prison. "There was a particular couple of squirrels across the quad that were quiet entertaining."

"Ah, squirrels," Buffy nodded as if it explained everything. "Must have been quite fascinating."

"Are you mocking me?"

"Am I?"

"You are," Wesley said sounding completely surprised, yet not as insulted as he thought he should be.

"You're a bright one, aren't you?" Buffy teased as they stopped in front of her prison cell.

Wesley opened the door. "In you go."

"See, now you just lost some 'cool points' there," Buffy sighed as she stepped through the barrier, fighting back a shudder at the tingly feeling. It was really sort of unnerving.

"Someone will be back in an hour to escort you to the Review," Wesley said through the open door.

"Oh, the joy that brings me," Buffy said dryly, trying to mask her worry.

Wesley smiled awkwardly. "Yes, well, goodbye," he said before shutting the door. The two Watchers that he didn't even know had left the moment Buffy had passed through the force field. Wesley stared at the wooden door. "Good luck," he said, not knowing that Buffy was able to hear him through the door.

Buffy smiled faintly. Looked as though she'd at least made one friend.

* * *

><p>Exactly an hour later, there was another knock on her door. Buffy rose from her chair, running a nervous hand through her hair as the door swung open. Even though she'd known that Wesley wouldn't be there, she still felt disappointed when she didn't seem him.<p>

It would have been nice to see a familiar face.

Instead, she was escorted out of her prison, across the quad, and into another dimly lit stone passageway. They stopped at an old antique looking elevator and Buffy watched as one of her escorts pushed the bottom button. Great, she was going underground.

As soon as the door opened, they were on the move again. The temperature difference was potent, and Buffy felt goose bumps on her arms. She looked around at the odd paintings and weaponry that hung on the walls. There was particular sword that caught her eye, and she really wanted to test it out, but thought it wouldn't do her any good to ask.

Finally, the winding passage ended and she was in a large circular room. It was sort of like the Roman Colosseum except there were no lions and half of it wasn't crumbled. In front of her, seated high on a large, ornate podium was Quentin Travers.

Seated around him were forty or so other Watchers, all of them looking at her appraisingly, making Buffy question her every move. There were two chairs in the middle of the room, and Buffy relaxed slightly seeing that Giles was already seated.

They shared a quick look.

_Are you alright?_

_Fine. You?_

_Fine._

Buffy scoffed at that, and Giles fought a smile.

The moment Buffy was seated in her chair, Travers began.

"Let it be known for the record that the official Review of Slayer Buffy Anne Summers, born on the nineteenth of January, 1981, took place on the twentieth of July, 1998."

Travers paused for a minute, letting the scribe catch up with him before continuing. "Also under review is Watcher Rupert Giles, born—"

"I know how old I am, I don't need you to say it," Giles cut in abruptly, causing Buffy to giggle.

Travers glared at him. "Then, let's not waste time then," he said before consulting something in front of him.

"Buffy Anne Summers, you are under Review for multiple violations of the Slayer Handbook, such as Section 17a-b, Section 47c, and Sections 54-56," Travers stated.

"Um, translation?" Buffy asked, raising her hand slightly. "Cause that totally just went over my head."

"Having your friends help you with your Calling, living with your mother, and allowing the Vampire Angelus to live," Travers said bluntly, causing Buffy to immediately argue.

"Wha—," Buffy began, but Travers talked over her.

"Rupert Giles, you're job is under Review," he stated plainly. "You're latest actions have caused the Council to question your commitment to our organization. Please answer truthfully to the following questions."

Giles lips were set in a firm line, and Buffy looked up at him worriedly.

"Did you or did you not deliberately omit vital details in your monthly reports?" Travers asked.

"I did," Giles answered sounding none too repentant.

"To what extent?" Travers prompted.

Giles glared. "I deliberately omitted the circumstances under which Angelus lost his soul, along with other things that I still refuse to say."

"And what were those circumstances?"

"Sorry, not my secret to tell," Giles answered coldly.

Travers eyes narrowed. "Did you or did you not completely forego the Handbook and substitute your own?"

"I did."

"Could you please elaborate?" one of the Watchers asked from their seat near Travers.

"I allowed her to socialize," Giles explained. "I even let her go to a shoe sale once instead of training. I know, I know, how silly of me. Letting her be a seventeen year old girl for once."

"Yes, thank you so much for explaining in such detail," Travers said sarcastically before continuing. "Did you did you not allow the Slayer to involve civilians in her Slaying?"

"I did, and before ask for me to elaborate, none of her friends were ever told purposely. All of them found out on their own, one way or another. They were advised of the risks, and chose to ignore them to help Buffy, their _friend_."

"They are just children," one Watcher interrupted. "They can't possibly know what they're doing. Do any of them have training?"

"Willow is a capable witch and Xander has proven himself to be quite resourceful. Cordelia is a continual surprise, and you should never underestimate Oz," Giles said coldly. "All of them have spent more time in the field than all of you put together."

"Moving on," Travers said annoyed at how utterly unrepentant Giles was. "And did you or did you not allow the vampire Angelus to live, even after terrorizing Sunnydale for months?" Travers leaned almost imperceptibly closer, waiting for Giles to try and deny it.

"I did not," Giles answered, his tone never wavering. "In case the fact as slipped your minds, Angelus is the most feared and considered by many to be the greatest vampire to ever walk the earth. Forgive me if we couldn't kill him quickly enough for you."

"But he still lives," a female Watcher spoke up. "He's down in our dungeons at this very moment."

"As I said before, Willow is a capable witch, and restored his soul, permanently," Giles explained. "But you already knew that, so I see no need to answer the question further."

"Just one more question," Travers suddenly smiled slightly. "Have you or have you not developed a father's love for the Slayer?"

Giles hesitated, looking at Buffy whose green eyes were wide with uncertainty. "I have," he answered quietly.

That was all Travers needed to know. "Rupert Giles, as of 12:26 p.m. on the twentieth of June, 1998, you are hereby fired from your position as Watcher."

"What! No!" Buffy argued immediately. "You can't do that!"

"Yes we can," Travers retorted easily. His gaze turned to Giles, who was glaring at Travers with a ferocity that made him glad that Giles was down there and he was up where he was. "Your affection for the child has rendered you incapable of clear and impartial thought. You have a father's love for the child and that is useless to our cause."

"The Council thinks that it would be best if you no longer have contact with the Slayer," Travers continued.

"Really? Interestingly enough, I don't give a rat's ass what the Council thinks!" Giles retorted heatedly, causing Buffy's eyes to widen in surprise at his language. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Ah, yes, but right now you are," Travers said snapping his fingers and immediately two big, burly men came forward and grabbed each of his arms.

Giles immediately began to struggle. "This is ludicrous!" Giles shouted angrily. "This completely presumptuous! You already know your verdict, nothing we do or say will change your minds! You're set in your ways and refuse to see any other point of view other than your _snobbish_, _naïve_, _arrogant_, _completely_ _delusional_, _bureaucratic_ _notions_!"

"Is that all?" Travers wondered dryly. "You'll be escorted to your quarters and will remain there until the Review is complete."

Giles was still yelling as the large, wooden double doors slammed behind him.

"Now," Travers said as his gaze settled on Buffy. "Miss Summers…are you ready?"

Buffy swallowed. _No._ "Yes."

* * *

><p><strong>How's that for dramatic? lol<strong>

**To give you guys a better mental picture, I saw the courtroom pretty much exactly like the courtroom in Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. :)**

**Wasn't Giles just epic? All of you seemed to like his little speech to Travers about Buffy, so I thought I'd let him rip Travers a new one again. lol**

**Review and make my day better,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Hello, lovely people! How are ya? Good? Great. Not so good? That sucks, I feel for you. So...last chapter I had some people missing Angel.**

**This chapter should fix that seeing as how this entire chapter is just Wesley and Angel (happy dance). I know I left you guys with a cliffie last chapter and be forwarned, this chapter ends with a cliffie too! (evil laugher) Anywho, we're taking a little hop back in time. This chapter takes place _during_ Giles and Buffy's review.**

**Okay...ready? :D :D :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Me: (squeals) I'm so excited!**

_**Angel: You're always excited...all the time...it's kinda freaking me out.**_

_**Wesley: I agree. She does seem to be a little...odd...**_

**Me: Aw, you guys are so sweet! Now, go have a good little heart to heart! Don't fight that curiosity Wes!**

_**Wesley: See? She calls me Wes too! What's so hard about Wesley? Wes-ley. It's not that difficult!**_

_**Angel: Whatever, Wes.**_

**Me: Yeah, Wes! Whatever.**

_**Wesley: (hangs head) I give up.**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 14<p>

It took some well-mannered speaking, a skillful amount of colorful compliments, and last, but certainly not least, a full day of brown-nosing. However, it was all worth it because after Wesley had picked his pride up off the floor, Travers granted his request to see the vampire Angelus under the guise of 'research'.

The meandering, gloomy passage down to the dungeons was one that Wesley had only ever traveled once, and he really had no desire to do so again. Nonetheless, he knew that he must, and that motivation was enough to carry his feet down the old, uneven stone steps.

Wesley shivered as the air temperature dropped the further he descended. It wasn't like the vampires minded. They had no need for warmth, but Wesley wouldn't have minded even the feeble flame of a candle.

Finally, his feet touched the damp stone of the floor of the dungeon, or rather the 'containment area' as Travers and the higher-ups preferred to call it. Immediately, he could hear the clinking of chains as the vampires moved as close to their cell doors as the crosses would allow, unable to keep away from the tantalizing smell of fresh, warm blood.

Wesley moved as quickly as he dared past the cells, ignoring the taunts and death threats that were shouted at him. He reached the last cell, Angelus' cell, and forced himself to seem cool, calm, and relaxed. In other words, he forced himself not to look scared as hell in front of who most Watchers considered to be the most notorious vampire to ever walk the Earth.

However, Angelus was not what he was expecting. The vampire looked up at his presence for maybe a second before his eyes returned to staring broodingly at the wall opposite him. His chains lay broken on the dust covered floor that Wesley knew was not the normal dust that housewives battled.

Angelus' shirt was in tatters, one clear bite mark was visible on his right arm, and Wesley guessed that the large portion of his shoulder that looked like someone had taken a chainsaw to it had to be from a vampire that really hadn't wanted to let go.

Wesley would have imagined Angelus to be arrogant, ridiculously so. That's what it said in every piece of literature he could find. Though it was written that Angelus had gained his soul due to a Romani gypsie, most Watchers thought that it was simply a ploy or rumor.

Wesley had been one of those Watchers…but now he was not so sure.

Suddenly more nervous than before, Wesley cleared his throat awkwardly. "Um, Angelus?"

Angel thought about looking up to answer the young man, but decided he'd rather brood some more.

Wesley tried again, changing tactics. "Angel?"

Now, Angel looked up. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you use 'Angel' instead of 'Angelus'?" Angel questioned, but then his senses caught up to him. "You've been with Buffy," he stated surely.

Wesley was caught completely off guard. Angel had gone from a sort of calm moroseness to protective and confident in an instant. He sat up a little straighter, he was more alert. Wesley was sure he'd even seen the vampire's muscles tense as if ready for a fight.

This left him confused.

"Yes," Wesley answered the vampire's inquiry warily. "How do you know?"

"Her scent," Angel explained. "You've been near her."

"Surely, it's very faint."

"It is."

"And yet you still noticed," Wesley said, believing that there might actually be some substance in Buffy's charges, and particularly Travers' assumption that the Slayer was in love with Angelus.

Travers had discussed this with Wesley before granting him permission to see Angelus. Honestly, Wesley had found it to be ludicrous and just, well, _stupid_. How could a Slayer, a _Vampire_ Slayer, love the being she was meant to kill? It just hadn't made sense to Wesley. Of course, this was only Travers assumption. The man had to believe that there was a reason, however seemingly impossible, for the Slayer's actions...or lack thereof, when Angelus had been roaming Sunnydale.

Even though Wesley thought that the idea of Buffy Summers being in love with a being such as Angelus was ridiculous...he could see the logic. Buffy was a seventeen year old girl. Angelus was, well, Angelus. It wouldn't be a stretch to think that Angelus had manipulated his way into her heart. But now, talking with the vampire, Wesley was beginning to wonder if this was much more complicated than the Watchers thought. Could Angelus possibly love the Slayer, truly?

Angel realized how his comment on Buffy's scent could be construed, and tried to find a way out of it. He shrugged nonchalantly, ignoring the fire in his shoulder. "You don't live as long as I have being careless."

"I suppose that's true," Wesley conceded, though he didn't quite believe Angel.

"Why are you here?" Angel asked suddenly, frowning slightly.

"Oh, um," Wesley fumbled. "Well, I was talking with Buffy and I share my quarters with Mr. Giles, at least for his stay here, and they both seem to—defend you. Buffy more so than Mr. Giles, and I just wondered…"

"Why?" Angel supplied helpfully, a sardonic grin on his face. "I wonder that myself."

"Oh?" Wesley prompted subtly.

Angel appraised the man in front of him for a few moments. He was young, well, compared to Angel he was baby, but that was getting too technical. Angel guess that he was in his late twenties. The young man had a lean build, though Angel doubted it was muscle. The man came across as the studious, stay-in-the-library-all-day-type.

But somehow, Angel found himself feeling as though he could trust this man. "What's your name?"

"Oh, do forgive me," Wesley said, not giving a second's thought to the fact he'd just apologized to a vampire. "Wesley Wyndam-Pryce."

"So, Wes." Angel stood up and leaned against the wall, crossing his arms over his chest. "What are you doing down here?"

"Coincidentally, both you and Buffy seem to prefer to call me Wes," Wesley informed him.

Angel fought a smile. "Wesley probably sounds too formal to her."

Wesley's brow furrowed. "I don't see how. She just said that Wesley took too long to say."

"That too."

"It's only two syllables!"

Angel couldn't help the chuckle that escaped him, and he didn't miss the completely shocked look Wesley made hearing the sound.

"I've never heard a vampire laugh—genuinely," Wesley said curiously, yet slightly wary.

"Probably because we can't," Angel replied. "Well, at least good-naturedly."

"You're the exception," Wesley pointed out. "You have a soul…" he trailed off in a question.

"Yes," Angel said sounding tired to Wesley's ears. "I have a soul."

"Remarkable," Wesley said almost to himself.

Angel smirked a little. "I suppose so."

Wesley studied Angel for a moment when his eyes caught a shimmer of metal on Angel's left hand. "Is that a Claddagh ring?" he asked sharper than he'd intended. Mainly because he was sure that he'd seen an identical ring on Buffy's hand this morning.

Angel pierced him with a glare for a moment, almost as if he was ready to deny it, but then he sighed and looked down at the ring. "Yeah, it is."

"It's an Irish wedding ring," Wesley stated. "The hands represent friendship, the crown—"

"I know what it means," Angel interrupted.

"—loyalty, and the heart, love," Wesley finished. "Whom do you wear it for? She must be quite the person to…"

"What?" Angel cut in. "Love me?"

"Well, yes," Wesley replied, enraptured with the tale that seemed to be beginning, or at least the potential of the tale. It could possibly solve everything.

Angel considered Wesley for a moment. For some reason, he thought he could trust him. Angel was good with people, or at least, he could read people. He knew people. Give him one glance and he could give you a gist of who that person was. His gut told him that Wesley, while easily led, had a good heart. And with the way he was asking questions, it was obvious that Wesley was curious as hell.

"She's beautiful," Angel said softly. "Inside and out…she has one of the purest hearts. She loves unconditionally—no matter what you've done…"

"She knows what you are?" Wesley inquired, growing more sure that Buffy was indeed the girl who Angel spoke of. "Everything you've done?"

Angel looked at him with agonized eyes. The pain and guilt in the brown orbs seemed depthless and Wesley had to look away for a moment. When Wesley looked back at Angel, the vampire was wearing a sad smile.

"She knows."

"And she still loves you."

"Yes."

"Then it seems like Buffy is quite a woman," Wesley stated confidently.

Angel froze. "You saw her ring," he guessed.

"Right-O," Wesley nodded. "Honestly, I'm surprised no one else has noticed."

Angel walked up to the bars of his cell, and shot his arm out, ignoring the searing, burning pain the silver caused. He grabbed a fist-full of Wesley's collar and yanked him forward so hard that Wesley only just managed to keep himself from banging his face agaisnt the cell door. Angel fixed Wesley with a glare that had Wesley's knees shaking. "If you use this against her, I won't hesitate to rip you apart," he growled. "Buffy doesn't need this. I've seen a few Slayers in my time. I've killed a few too, and believe me when I say she's the best. This whole 'Review' is because of me and what I've done and what decision I forced her to make."

"What decision?" Wesley wondered quietly, almost afraid to ask, but his curiosity got the better of him.

"Whether or not to kill me," Angel answered pained, losing his fire and releasing his hold on Wesley. He walked away from the cell door, his burnt arm hanging limply at his side. "You already know that I lost my soul a few months back, right?"

Wesley nodded.

"Buffy—she tried, she had opportunities, but…"

"She couldn't do it," Wesley finished softly, feeling a wave of sympathy roll through him that he didn't bother to question. "She couldn't kill you."

"She would have," Angel said seriously. "She almost did—if I'd gotten my soul back a second later…"

Both Wesley and Angel were quiet for a moment, contemplating their own thoughts. Angel was swathed in a cocoon of guilt and worry. He'd gone far too long without seeing Buffy, and last night had been hard. She'd stayed the night with him only twenty-four hours before, and he was already addicted to holding her as she fell asleep. Now, she was going through this damn Review, which was all Angel's fault.

Wesley was completely torn by the information he'd gleaned. It was one thing to have a theory. It was another to realize that your theory was true. He'd guessed that maybe, just maybe, Angel could possibly love Buffy and she him.

Hearing it confirmed, seeing it with his own eyes, well, Wesley was stumped. He had no doubt that Angel loved the Slayer, Buffy Summers. No doubt whatsoever. Not even the best of the best could fake the emotion in his eyes. It was obvious that Angel's whole world revolved around this one, superhuman girl.

Thinking back to Buffy's feelings, Wesley realized how much he'd truly missed. She'd been so adamant. He'd asked her how she could trust him, how she could let him live.

"_He has a soul."_ That had been her only defense. Wesley thought that her reason had lacked support…but now, after meeting Angel, after talking with him, Wesley realized that it was really the only argument she needed.

Wesley didn't know what to do. A part of him was ordering him to run up to the trial and shout what he knew. It was only his duty. He had confirmation that Buffy was indeed guilty of loving a vampire, of sparing his life. She had broken the Golden Rule, she'd spared a vampire's life. She was a Vampire Slayer. Slayers did not do that. It was not their job to divvy mercy to those they deemed worthy.

However, there was another part of him whispering in his ear to do what _he_ thought was right. There was the little boy who'd loved to learn, but was never loved by his father. There was a little boy who'd been open to the world and everything in it. This little boy, this part of him, had been squelched...first by his father and now by the Watchers.

"What are you still doing here?" Angel asked. "Aren't you going to run off and tattle?"

Wesley remained quiet for a few moments and Angel wondered if he'd misjudged the man.

"No," Wesley said quietly. "No, I'm not."

"Thank you," Angel said sincerely and Wesley merely nodded and they were quiet again for a few more minutes.

"How'd you get down here anyway?" Angel asked after a minute. "Did you have to sign a visitor's log?" he joked half-heartedly.

"No, I kissed as much ass as I could," Wesley admitted ruefully. "It worked. Technically, I'm here for 'research.'"

"They bought that?" Angel raised his eyebrows.

"Travers is very susceptible to flattery," Wesley said dryly. "That and I'm one of his favorites. He has 'high hopes' for me," he quoted, not feeling quite so much pride now at the thought.

"Knew you were an overachiever," Angel said with a small smile.

"Like you?"

Angel chuckled humorlessly. "Not at all like me. I was living off rats in New York City alleys not four years ago."

"What?" Wesley questioned confused. All of this change had been so recent?

"You didn't think I've always been this way, did you?" Angel shook his head. "No, this…good streak is relatively new."

"What did you do before?" Wesley inquired. "Or did you always resort to alleys and rats?"

Angel shrugged, not really wanting to give too much detail. He may be getting semi-trustworthy vibes from Wes, but that didn't make him an automatic confidante. "Followed Darla around for a while, came to America turn of the century, moved around a bit."

"And ended up in an alley in the Big Apple," Wesley finished, knowing that there was much, much more to the story, but he knew not to push.

"Yeah."

"So what made you decide to fight the good fight?" Wesley said, unable to help the slight quirk of his lips.

"Whistler," Angel answered simply. Seeing Wesley's look he elaborated a little. "Demon, messenger for the Powers That Be, he showed me Buffy…"

"Love at first sight?"

Angel wore a wry smile. "Cliché, I know, but yeah."

"Wesley," a voice said from behind them, causing Wesley to spin around surprised.

"Dalton," Wes returned, hoping that he didn't look like a kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar. "Um, what are you doing here?"

"It's time for Angelus to join the party upstairs," Dalton answered, motioning to one of the men behind him for the keys to Angel's cell.

"Oh?" Wesley inquired. "How's it going?" he asked for both his benefit and Angel's.

Dalton grinned, "Her Watcher got escorted out, kicking and screaming. Council sacked him."

"And the Slayer?" Wesley asked further.

Dalton shrugged, his countenance losing its good humor and becoming serious. "Don't know much. Everyone's being tight-lipped about it…but I hear she's defending all her," he glanced at Angel, an action that neither Angel nor Wesley missed. "Choices."

"Well, then I guess I must be on my way," Wesley said, not looking at Angel. "I've learned all I can—not much. Not very talkative, Angelus."

"We'll see," Dalton muttered as he unlocked the cell and the two men behind him grabbed either of Angel's arms to haul him up to the trial.

Angel was pleased about two things.

One, he was getting out of this damn cell.

Two, he was going to see Buffy.

He really didn't care about anything else at the moment. The Watchers could all go to hell.

* * *

><p><strong>Well...there we go! The next chapter is, I think, one of my best. If you really love to hate Travers, then you'll love the next chapter! I tried to make him as evil as I could, because, well, I needed a bad guy and I don't like him anyway. lol<strong>

**Reviews make my world go round,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: Okay, here we are! This is absolutely, without a doubt, one of my ultimate favorite chapters I've ever written. I am so excited! This chapter was tons and tons of fun to write. Mainly because I got to write Travers being so freakin' evil! Just a warning, you are going to want him dead by the end of the chapter, which, I think, shouldn't bother any of you. And before you go getting any ideas, Travers, however annoying, will remain alive...but that doesn't mean that we can't come up with terrible, yet somewhat humorous ways for Travers to bite the dust to pass the time! :D**

**Anywho, I'm glad all of you enjoyed the last chapter! Wes and Angel were fun to write, and I like writing that inital sorta kinda trust they've got going. If you remember, the last chapter took place during the beginning of _this_ chapter. So, hopefully that saves some potential confusion.**

**Alright then...here we go!**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy). **

**Me: Alrighty, guys I need some serious emotion, 'kay?**

_**Angel: How serious?**_

**Me: Holding-back-tears-because-they-can't-fathom-the-guilt-you-feel-tears.**

_**Angel: Oh...**_

**Me: Same goes for you Buffy.**

_**Buffy: That's so not cool.**_

**Me: Yeah, I know...but you have to think about what you've done...**

_**Travers: Because I'll tell you exactly what you've done!**_

**Me: Shut up, Travers. Away with you! **

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 15<p>

_Previously (Chapter 13)…_

"_Now," Travers said as his gaze settled on Buffy. "Miss Summers…are you ready?"_

_Buffy swallowed. _No_. "Yes."_

Buffy's heart pounded in her chest, and she expected it to leap out of her body any minute. It was utterly quiet in the room except for the rustling papers and the scratching pens of some of the 'jury members,' or, at least, that's what Buffy had dubbed them some time ago. All in all, the whole atmosphere had Buffy on edge.

She couldn't believe that Giles had been so...un-Giles like. Seeing him being dragged out of the room had been shocking. Buffy had never seen Giles so angry. She was worried about him. Where had they taken him? Was he okay? What was he doing now?

She supposed she should probably be focusing more on her own defense, but Buffy couldn't make her mind focus on herself. She was worried about Angel too. Buffy hadn't seen him since they'd arrived and had no idea if he was alright or not. The thought that he might not even be alive tore at her heart, but Buffy batted it away, refusing to consider it further.

In the back of her mind, she even wondered where Wesley was at the moment. She figured he was having much more fun than she was.

Her anxiety climbed as Travers paused, purposely she knew, to consult his stupid notes. Buffy knew he was trying to freeze her up, to make her so nervous she just blurted out exactly what they wanted to hear so that he could smirk, shout that he was right from the rooftops, and then causally condemn her to whatever punishment he chose.

Finally, Travers looked up from his notes and asked the first question. "Miss Summers, during our interviews of your friends, we discovered that not only do they help you with your Calling, but they play a pivotal role in some of your more…impressive acts."

Buffy smiled, shrugging it off. "Well, what are friends for, right?" she asked before her gaze hardened. "Oh, wait, you wouldn't know that because you don't have any friends."

"Ah, but we're not here to talk about me," Travers shook his head, not amused by her games, yet refusing to show it. "This is all about you. Now, please, Miss Summers, would you answer the question?"

_It wasn't really a question, _Buffy thought to herself. "Yes, my friends help me," she answered, before adding. "I never wanted them to help me, and I would never have asked. I would never have told them my secret in the first place if it hadn't been for everything that happened."

"And what would that have been?" one of the Watchers asked.

Buffy sighed, before launching into the explanation. "When I first moved to Sunnydale, I got there just in time for the Harvest. The Master was trying to get above ground and make everything all hunky-dory for vamps. Anyway, Willow, Xander, and Jesse became the take-out menu one night and were taken. I saved Willow and Xander…but I couldn't save Jesse," she finished quietly, regret clear in her voice. "After that, Will and Xander both knew something was up. I couldn't let them just go out there alone, not knowing what they were up against."

"Two others know of your Calling," the Watcher continued. "A…" she paused to look at her notes. "Cordelia Chase and a Daniel Osborne?"

"They both found out by accident," Buffy explained. "Cordelia was almost bitten by Luke during the Harvest, and Oz was just trying to attend my seventeenth birthday party—I had some uninvited guests."

"You never willingly chose to tell anyone?" the Watcher asked pointedly, and Buffy began to wonder if she was on her side.

Buffy shook her head, "No."

"But you still allow them to help you," Travers took over again.

"They _want_ to help," Buffy argued. "I mean, sure, I'd rather them not because they can get hurt, but they _want_ to help. Willow is mostly research anyway; she's good with books and stuff. Oz does the same, and if Cordy takes the time to read a book, then she helps too. Xander usually makes pizza runs. Honestly, they rarely come out with me to actually patrol."

"Rationalizing your actions does not validate them," Travers said in an annoyingly arrogant voice. "You still violated the Handbook."

"But—"

"Moving on," Travers ignored her. "You are also accused of violating Section 47c."

"And that would be what, exactly?" Buffy asked anxiously, not liking how the proceedings were going. She didn't think she was winning.

"You continue you go to school and live with your mother," Travers elaborated. "Now, we have allowed this previously due to Mr. Giles assurances that it did not distract you from your Calling. Although, what with Mr. Giles' attachment to you, the Council sees this as something that needs to be addressed."

"Look," Buffy said heatedly, anger overcoming her nervousness. "I'm not some weapon that you can just use whenever or however you choose. I'm a person, not an object. I need to live with my mom; I need to have friends; I need to go to school. Is it just a little bit of a hassle to still turn in that English paper Monday after saving the world over the weekend? Yeah, it is. Do my grades suffer for it? Yeah, they do, but I wouldn't have it any other way."

"You want it all," one Watcher spoke up. "This is illogical. You cannot live a normal life and fulfill your Calling as a Slayer."

"No, I can't," Buffy agreed. "But I don't have to choose one or the other, either. I can have a balance of both, and so far I'm kinda likin' the results."

"Yes, the Council does concede you have quite an impressive record," Travers admitted reluctantly. "However, the Council is much more interested in what happened the past four months."

Buffy's expression didn't falter, but she felt the blood drain from her face. Maybe with the dim lighting they wouldn't notice.

Suddenly the doors opened, and Buffy looked up to see Angel being led to the room. The Watchers quickly chained him to the wall with manacles that Buffy hadn't even noticed were present. Throughout all of this, Travers had not once looked at the new arrivals.

"Four months ago, Angelus began to terrorize Sunnydale," Travers continued as if nothing had happened, causing Buffy to focus her attention back on him. "Not once did you kill him, though you had many opportunities to do so."

Buffy started to speak, but Travers held up a silencing hand. "But let's not get ahead of ourselves. The most important question is why this happened when it could have been easily avoided."

"Avoided how?" Buffy wanted to know, although she knew _exactly_ how it could have been avoided.

"Your final charge is being in violation of Sections 54-56 of the Slayer Handbook, which states, among other things, that all vampires met by the Slayer should be killed," Travers explained.

Buffy felt like her heart had stopped.

"It is not a Slayer's duty to grant mercy," Travers continued. "It is not her place."

"Angel has a soul," Buffy defended, glancing at Angel, and noting with worry that his entire left arm was stained red with blood. "He's not evil."

"But he's not innocent."

"Neither are you," Buffy shot back angrily. "None of us are completely innocent!"

"I'm fairly sure that none of us here have killed the number of people that Angelus has over the centuries," Travers retorted coldly. "Tell me, what all do you know about Angelus?"

Buffy glanced at Angel, who wouldn't meet her gaze. "I—I know the gist of it."

"Ah, I see you don't know the specifics," Travers said calmly. "Perhaps I should enlighten you," he said as he opened up a book and took the time to adjust his glasses. "Ah, here we go. Angelus, turned sometime around 1753, was sired by the vampire Darla, member of the Order of Aurelius."

"I know that," Buffy interrupted. "Kinda hard to forget since Darla tried to shoot me and the Master killed me."

Travers merely raised his eyebrows before continuing to read. "His first victims were his family, did you know that?"

Buffy was silent. She did know. Angel had told her.

"He killed his father, his mother…and his little sister," Travers said emotionlessly, though purposely emphasizing the 'little' in little sister. "She wasn't more than twelve."

Buffy looked at Angel, and he could feel her gaze on him. Angel was torn at being overwhelmed with guilt and overwhelmed with fury. Guilt because what Travers had read was true. He'd killed his family, yes. Angel was also furious that Travers even had the gall to _mention_ Kathy. Dear, sweet, sweet Kathy, the little girl that he'd loved so much—his fondest memory of his human life. Travers wasn't worthy to even allude to her.

Buffy's heart broke at Angel's expression. She'd never seen so much guilt in his eyes.

Buffy glared at Travers, "Angel would never do that. He'd never harm anyone if he could help it."

"Angelus did," Travers retorted easily. "And I'm just dusting the surface on Angelus," he motioned to the book he held in his hands and Buffy couldn't help but notice how thick the volume was. "It says that in 1793, he killed his first Slayer. A young French mademoiselle, Marguerite Jarvis."

Angel had closed his eyes when Travers had mentioned killing a Slayer. He hadn't just killed one Slayer, he'd killed three in his time. Buffy didn't know about it, and he hadn't planned to tell her. It was something that he didn't want her to know. How would she feel about him now? Knowing that he'd taken out three of her predecessors? He could feel her gaze on him, and it felt like she was burning a hole through him.

"Tell me, how can you let him live?" Travers said calmly. "Angelus has killed one of your kin, a girl just like you. Well, she was actually a little younger than you," Travers pretended to consult his book. "Ah, she was fourteen."

"It wasn't Angel," Buffy argued quietly, yet on the inside she wanted to go up to Angel and demand details. Why hadn't he told her?

Travers looked back at his book. "Angelus killed two more Slayers after dear Marguerite…one in Scotland and one in Italy. All of those girls were like you, doing their duty, and he killed them. How can you let a vampire such as him live?"

Travers studied Buffy, watching for reactions, anything that would give her away. He was baiting her and it was working. The great thing was that he was just glossing the shiny surface of everything that Angleus had done. He could easily do this all night.

"Angelus also seemed to have an affinity for killing people during the Christmas holidays," Travers said, pretending to be surprised. "Such a joyful time, and he openly mocked it by killing. What about those families? Their Christmas was ruined, instead of celebrating they were preparing a funeral. You let the monster responsible for this strife live."

Buffy couldn't help the tears in her eyes. Christmas was her favorite time of year, and she hated that Angelus had destroyed a time so precious. Her heart ached for the families that had suffered. The thought caused her to think of the other families who had suffered most recently due to Angelus. All because she hadn't been strong enough, because she'd been selfish enough to want Angel in her life somehow.

"I-It wasn't him…" she argued weakly, but Travers pretended not to notice and continued.

"And Drusilla," he shook his head. "His most notable, and most notorious work if I do say so myself," he sighed. "Drove her mad, killed her family, destroyed her very life and sanity before he finally turned her…and you still let this monster live…"

Buffy felt a tear slide down her cheek that she didn't realize Angel had seen.

Angel fought the tears that were trying to pool in his own eyes. He didn't like to think about everything that he'd done, and he sure as hell didn't want to hear it read, especially by someone like Travers, and he didn't want it to be read to Buffy either. She didn't deserve to be burdened with the knowledge of what he truly was.

"It seems to me, Miss Summers, that knowing as much as you do about Angelus…how could you let such a loathsome creature walk around, terrorizing you and your friends, killing who knows how many…how could you allow this? What kind of Slayer does that make you?"

Buffy's breath caught in her throat. _What kind of Slayer does that make you?_ The question seemed to play on a loop in her mind. It wasn't the first time she'd heard that question. She'd asked herself that very same thing numerous times over the past four months. What kind of Slayer _did_ that make her? She'd been willing to let people die, just on the off-chance that maybe Angel's soul could be restored to him. She'd been that selfish. She'd been willing to let people die, the people she was meant to protect. She'd let them die for her own selfish reasons. Jenny had died because Buffy hadn't been strong enough. She hadn't been strong enough to kill Angelus, because by doing so she killed every chance of ever seeing Angel again.

What kind of Slayer did that make her? That was truly the million dollar question.

"You let Angelus live, knowing what he was capable of..." Travers continued, though he paused when he heard a soft sob from Buffy. "Miss Summers, how could you let this happen?"

Buffy fought to get her emotions under control. She hadn't been strong enough before, that was true. But in the end, she had been. She'd been ready to kill him. One wasn't automatically strong. It took time. It took experience. Buffy had grown stronger because of Angelus. She'd also learned the difference between Angel and Angelus. It'd had always been clear to her, theoretically. Now, after everything that had happened, she'd seen the difference and it was clearer than she'd ever thought it to be.

"Angel didn't do those things," Buffy argued quietly, squeezing her eyes shut to try and force back her tears. "The soul had absolutely no part in that. It was the demon, _not_ Angel."

"That's not the question here, Miss Summers," Travers shook his head. "You let Angelus live. He killed your schoolmates. He killed Ms. Calendar. He put your best friend in the hospital. He terrorized you for months…he tried to end the world by awakening Acathla."

"He's still a vampire," one Watcher spoke and Buffy glared at her. "It is your duty to kill him."

"He has a soul," Buffy repeated through gritted teeth. "He feels more guilt than you can possibly imagine. He lives with the memories of what Angelus did, and he has the heart to feel responsible! He helps me with Slaying, and he has saved my life more than once!"

Angel looked at Buffy incredulously, and unable to help the surge of love that blossomed in his heart. He'd known she was compassionate; he'd known that she loved unconditionally. But after hearing what all he'd done…and Travers was right, he'd barely even dusted the surface of possible material...but after all of that, Buffy was still defending him. Unworthiness washed through him in waves.

"You seem awfully passionate about him," a female Watcher pointed out, narrowing her eyes.

"He's my friend!" Buffy replied hotly. "I stick up for my friends!"

"Miss Summers," Travers scolded her as if she were a kindergartener. "There is no need to yell."

Buffy shut her mouth and fumed silently, glaring at Travers.

"Ah, that's better," Travers said, "Getting back on point. Let's talk about Acathla for a moment. You, a Slayer, not only let Angelus live, but because of this, we _all_ almost lost. Because of your unwillingness to kill your 'friend,' Hell was almost brought upon earth. In fact, it's only been two weeks since this occurred, yes?"

"Yes," Buffy whispered.

"And…Angelus is _still_ alive," Travers stressed. "After all that he's done, both past and present, you still allow him to live?"

Even though she was coming to make peace with what she'd done, Buffy couldn't stop the guilt that washed through her. "Yes," Buffy choked back a sob.

"Why?" Travers asked simply.

"He has a soul," Buffy defended, clinging to the notion in her heart and mind.

"But he didn't at the time," Travers pointed out, before seeming to be struck with a question. "But how can that be?" Travers asked pointedly. "You said that Angel had a soul before he became Angelus."

"H-he lost it," Buffy answered quietly, glancing at Angel once again out of the corner of her eye. He met her surreptitious gaze guiltily. "You already knew that."

Travers ignored her accusation. "So, Angel lost his soul, and became Angelus again, yes?"

"Yes."

"And _how_ did he lose his soul, by chance?" Travers wondered. "Or was it a little more complicated?"

At this point, Angel was just ready to hand himself over to the Watchers and tell them to do with him as they wished. As long as he could spare Buffy this pain that he, by extension, was causing. It was _his_ past. It was _his_ crimes. It was _him_. All of this was because of _him_.

He didn't deserve her love. He didn't deserve her defense. How could he, only two days ago, have been hoping that maybe, just maybe it would all work out between them? He was selfish, that was why. He wanted happiness. He wanted Buffy.

This would be easier if Buffy didn't want him. But she did. She loved him, and she wouldn't let him forget it. No matter what he did, as Angel or Angelus, it didn't matter. She loved him.

Angel almost wished she didn't.

"I don't know how he lost it," Buffy lied, and Angel closed his eyes briefly.

"I think you do," Travers said seriously. "May I point out Miss Summers, that if you are found guilty during this Review, you will be moved to London where you will be taught to perform to your highest potential? And not the way Mr. Giles taught you. No, we would follow the Handbook to the letter."

"You can't do that!" Buffy argued angry and incredulous. "You can't just ship me over here to London! What about my Mom? What about school?"

"You mother would, of course, be notified," Travers answered as if it were no consequence. "And school would be moot. There is no reason for you to go. The only subjects a Slayer needs to know are demonology and other subjects related to the Occult."

"Not biased much, are you?" Buffy snapped, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Getting back on point," Travers said calmly. "How did _Angel_ lose his soul?"

"I told you, I don't know," Buffy lied through clenched teeth.

"You're lying," Travers shook his head. "How can a Slayer, especially as one as impressive as you, Miss Summers," he said oh, so graciously. "_Not_ know?"

"Maybe I missed it in the Sunday paper," Buffy joked sarcastically, building up some steam, filing away her guilt over letting Angelus do what he'd done for later brooding. The thought almost made her snort. Setting time away for brooding…it was so something that Angel would do.

Travers frowned, and Buffy could practically see the steam coming out of his ears. "Miss Summers, I will not ask you again—"

"Good, cause I don't know the answer," Buffy interrupted heatedly.

"That's enough!" Travers slammed his hand down on the podium. "I and by extension the Council, will not be made a mockery of! Answer the question, Miss Summers!"

"There was a catch to Angel's curse," Buffy snapped angrily, deciding she had to give them something. "If Angel were to experience any moment of true happiness then he would lose his soul."

Travers smiled, glad they were getting somewhere. "And what could have made him so happy if he is so wracked by the guilt you say he carries?"

Buffy remained silent.

"Miss Summers?" Travers inquired with a slight, evil quirk of his lips. "Do you have an answer?"

"No."

"Liar," Travers replied quietly, yet with a dangerous menace in his tone that caused Buffy to pause. "Miss Summers, I don't think you understand me. I don't think Angelus is your friend."

"Well, he's not," Buffy retorted quickly. No, she was definitely not friends with Angelus. "I don't really like people that don't have a soul. It kinda bums me out."

"I think he's more than your friend," Travers continued, ignoring her, watching her reaction to his words carefully. He had to give her some credit though, because she barely twitched. It was so slight that he would have missed it if he hadn't been waiting for it.

Travers paused for a beat, letting his words fully sink in, before delivering the knockout punch. "I think, Miss Summers, that you're in love with him."

Buffy stood frozen for a moment, swearing that she'd felt her heart stop before it began thudding like it thought its beats were numbered. "That's crazy," she denied, but she couldn't help the quick glance she shot Angel out of the corner of her eye. He was standing stock still, his eyes burning a hole in Travers head.

"Isn't it?" Travers questioned rhetorically before looking towards the guards that had suddenly surrounded Angel. "Kill him."

"No!" Buffy cried, immediately starting towards Angel, but four Watchers held her back. "No! Don't!" she pleaded as she thrashed and tried to break free from the vise-like grips the men had on her arms.

The twang of a crossbow bolt caused Buffy to freeze in horror.

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><p><strong>Da, da, da, dum!<strong>

**Did I seriously just end another chapter with _another_ cliffhanger? Yes, yes I did.**

**(Ducks objects thrown in outrage)**

**I swear I love you all,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: Hello, beautiful people! Thank you so much for all of your reviews! They are all wonderful and I love each and every one! This chapter is shorter than the others, but I hope the content makes up for it! :D**

**I have a feeling this will make lots of people happy...**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Angel? Angel?**_

**Angel: (broods) I'm not talking to you.**

_**Me: (pouts) But why?**_

**Angel: You tried to kill me! (pauses) Wait, it _was_ all fake right?**

_**Me:...**_

**Angel: _Right? _**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 16<p>

Buffy's heart had stopped. All she could do was stare at the circle of Watchers that had surrounded Angel. She couldn't see him. She couldn't see if he was dust…if he was dead. She vaguely felt the tears that were running down her cheeks. She thought she was saying words, but she had no idea what they were, though Buffy imagined that they were probably incoherent whispers of denial.

Anger boiled in her veins as she realized that Angel might be gone, that they might have killed him. Buffy struggled against her restrainers anew. One arm broke free and she immediately punched one of the Watchers holding in her the face, feeling his nose crunch under her fist. Buffy spun and delivered a roundhouse kick to another Watcher's temple, sending him sprawling into another Watcher. Both of them fell to the ground. The last Watcher tried to grab her shoulder, but Buffy simply flipped him over onto his back.

Not hesitating a moment, she ran over to where the Watchers had surrounded Angel and noticed that some of them were on the ground…

Angel had broken his chains just in time to catch the arrow between his palms. What didn't help was that seven other Watchers also had loaded crossbows.

He could hear Buffy screaming, but he couldn't focus too much on the distressed sound as he dodged another arrow. Angel attacked the closest Watcher to him, kicking the crossbow out of his hands as a bolt from another crossbow hit his shoulder.

Growling, Angel grabbed a Watcher by the shoulder and shoved him towards the Watcher, obscuring their line of fire for a moment. He used the borrowed seconds to punch a Watcher in the face, knocking him out cold.

Angel could hear another bolt whistling through the air, and ducked just in time as it whizzed over his head. Of course, he wasn't quick enough to dodge the other bolt that embedded itself into his bicep. Ignoring the pain, Angel reached out and tore a crossbow from a Watcher's hands and fired it one-handed, hitting a Watcher in the shoulder.

Buffy joined him then, and they fought side-by-side. Buffy disarmed a Watcher, kicking the crossbow from his hands. She pushed him into another Watcher, and when another grabbed her shoulder, she responded with a fist to the man's face.

Buffy eventually fought her way so that she was back to back with Angel. She did a quick scan and found that there were still four Watchers with loaded crossbows, trying to get a shot. Realizing this, Buffy stopped fighting, spun Angel around and then stepped in front of him, slowly backing them up so that Angel was against the wall, and she was in front of them—four crossbows trained on her heart.

"Miss Summers, are you quite finished?" Travers asked calmly from his seat, not having moved throughout the entire ordeal.

"Buffy," Angel whispered pleadingly, not liking the fact that Buffy was putting herself in harm's way. "Buffy, move."

"No," she shook her head. She knew she was caught. She knew what this meant.

"Why, Miss Summers, why did you let Angelus live? Why couldn't you kill him? It wasn't for lack of skill, you've proven that. What was it then? What prevented you from killing him? Why were you willing to sacrifice so many lives?"

Despite herself, hearing Travers spell it out so bluntly, so coldly what she'd done, Buffy couldn't help the guilty tears that appeared in her eyes. It didn't help knowing that if somehow, it were to all happen again—she wouldn't do a thing differently.

Buffy looked up at Travers as a single tear slid down her cheek. "Because I love him."

Travers almost allowed himself a small smile in triumph. At best, he gave away a slight quirk of his lips. "You're in love with a vampire, and Angelus at that."

"Angel," Buffy corrected coldly. "Yes, I'm in love with him. Is that what you want to hear? That I proved you right?"

"Miss Summers, it is not a question of if I'm right, it is the fact that _you_ are _wrong_," Travers replied, glancing at Angel. "You're willing to die for him?"

"In a heartbeat," Buffy retorted quickly, but seriously.

"You'd kill for him?"

Buffy hesitated, slightly shocked and scared at her answer. "Yes."

She felt Angel stiffen behind her, but she ignored him. Buffy knew he'd bring it up, if they made it out of here, but she'd confront that later.

"And, just out of curiosity," Travers seemed to be trying to hide his curiosity. "Does _Angel _return your feelings?"

"Yes," Angel answered quietly, but firmly. "And can you not point those at her?" he asked, looking pointedly at the crossbows that were still directed at Buffy's heart.

Travers waved his hand in a lazy motion and the Watchers lowered the crossbows, backing away slowly, one of the Watchers stooping down to drag his unconscious comrade with them.

"Better?" Travers asked.

"Mildly," Angel replied, his eyes following the retreating Watchers.

Once he was sure they weren't going to try anything he reached up and pulled the arrow out of his bicep, hissing as it tore at his flesh. He tossed it to the ground, before grabbing hold of the shaft of the bolt that was embedded in his shoulder. Angel couldn't help the low growl that escaped him as he yanked it free, and threw it to the ground. That one really hurt.

Travers debated where to go from here. Honestly, he'd thought Angelus would die in the dungeons. He'd beaten eight starving vampires, and though he hadn't escaped unscathed, he'd still made it out alive.

Of course, Travers had thought of a contingency plan...which had been the eight Watchers with crossbows...which had just been thwarted. Travers didn't quite know what to do now. Did he allow them to tell their story? Morally, he should give them a chance, he supposed.

He glanced around at his fellow Watchers, all of whom were looking to him for guidance. It was obvious by some of their expressions that they wanted to know more. Also obvious was the mild disgust of the mere idea of love between a vampire and Slayer.

Travers suddenly had a very pertinent question that he believed might have just been answered. "So, how did Angel lose his soul? A moment of perfect happiness?"

The faint blush in Buffy's cheeks gave it away.

"Ah," Travers said, slightly shocked at the fact that his hunch had been correct. "Well, that's…interesting."

"What's to say that it won't happen again?" one Watcher, a woman, spoke up knowingly, glancing from Buffy to Angel.

"Angel's soul is anchored," Buffy spoke up quickly. "Permanently."

"How can you be sure?" another Watcher asked.

"Because Willow is sure it worked, and because he obviously has a soul," Buffy replied, figuring it best not to tell them that she and Angel knew for a fact that the spell had worked fully—in all its facets.

"It's not like we plan to test it," Angel lied smoothly. After all, he was the world's best actor.

Travers gave them a look that clearly said that he didn't believe them, but he moved on. "How long have you been…involved?"

"I met Angel when I first came to Sunnydale," Buffy replied. "But we, uh, didn't start dating, officially at least, until later."

"There's no record of you for eighty years," one Watcher spoke up, directing his question at Angel.

"It's not that hard to drop off radar if you don't do much," Angel replied with a shrug.

"What could possibly motivate you to help the Slayer in the first place?" another Watcher asked, more openly curious than his fellows. "Aside from the fact that you…love her."

"I'm supposed to protect her," Angel answered, before deciding 'to-hell-with-it' and giving them a little bit more information to chew on. "Whistler, a demon messenger for the Powers That Be, showed her to me. I was there when Buffy was Called—I've been with her ever since," he explained, glancing down at Buffy who was surprised at the information. "Whether she knew it or not," he added with a small smirk despite himself.

"The Powers That Be?" Travers questioned, hardly containing his shock. "Impossible."

Angel glared. "It's the truth."

"Ridiculous," Travers shook his head. He refused to believe it. The Powers could _not_ have chosen a _vampire_ to do their bidding. Impossible.

"Wait!"

Wesley and Giles came running through the doors, Wesley waving a scroll in his hand. "Wait! Don't kill him!"

Buffy looked at Wesley curiously, "Little late with the dramatic entrance, Wes."

Wesley's eyes widened in disbelief for a moment before he saw Angel standing beside her, then he looked confused. "I don't understand. Angel's alive."

"Yeah, you missed the big fight about five minutes ago," Buffy enlightened.

"Oh," Wesley replied lamely.

"Mr. Wyndam-Pryce," Travers said scoldingly. "This is a closed Review."

"I know sir, but this couldn't wait and is pertinent to the proceedings," Wesley replied courteously. "As you know, I've been translating the Scrolls of Aberjian, and I've discovered something…quite spectacular really, shocking, but spectacular," Wesley glanced at Giles.

"And what, Mr. Wyndam-Pryce, could be so important?" Travers asked annoyed, yet slightly curious.

"We believe that the Scrolls contain a prophecy—"

"Of course they contain a prophecy," Travers began, his annoyance reaching a new level.

"Yes," Wesley agreed. "But this prophecy speaks of a vampire."

"Not unheard of," Travers answered blithely. "Mr. Wyndam-Price, you are wasting mine and the Council's time..."

"I believe the prophecy is about Angel," Wesley answered confidently. "It speaks of the vampire with a soul."

Everyone was shocked into silence.

* * *

><p><strong>Well...did I make people happy? <strong>

**Buffy and Angel kicked some Watcher butt...always a plus in my mind...**

**Wesley translated the Scrolls...**

**All in all, I'd say we got a lot accomplished! :D**

**Reviews punch Travers in the face,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: Sorry this is a day late, folks! I woke up yesterday with a fever, an itchy throat, and a runny nose. I really just wanted to crawl into a hole and slowly wilt away. BUT I took some medicine so I'm all good now...I just stare off into space for random periods of time...**

**Anywho, I'm real nervous today. All-Region Choir Try-outs are today! Ah! My voice is still all scratchy, and it's my senior year! I can't _not_ make it! So your reviews today will REALLY help my mood (and mental stability). :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy).**

_**Me: I have great news guys!**_

**Angel: Which means that it's not good for us.**

_**Me: (frowns) Have you no faith in me?**_

**Buffy: After all the hell you've but us through so far? No, not really feelin' much faith.**

**Wesley: She does have a point. I mean, you tried to kill Angel...twice.**

**Buffy: Not somethin' I'm goin' to forget. **

_**Me: (giggles nervously) But...I gave you and Angel fluffy moments!**_

**Buffy: Really?**

**Angel: Yes!**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 17<p>

The Review was adjourned so that Travers and a select group of Watchers could pour over the Scrolls to see if Wesley was indeed correct. The idea that Angel could be in a prophecy was shocking to them all. It made a lot of them question many of their feelings towards the vampire.

This wasn't necessarily because of the simple fact that Angel was mentioned. It was more that he had an entire prophecy to himself and what that prophecy could possibly foretell.

A vampire, a warrior for the Powers That Be—it seemed inconceivable.

In the Watcher's shock, they had not ordered that Angel be escorted back to the dungeons. Rather, they allowed him to be in Buffy's quarters, seeing as how it was as good as a cell anyway. Wesley and Giles had deferred to their shared quarters for a moment, allowing the couple some time alone.

The moment the door had shut, they'd both reached for each other.

Angel held her close and Buffy held him so tight that it almost hurt. She buried her head in his chest and tried not to cry in sheer relief at the fact that, for the moment, they were both alive and well.

"Buff—," Angel began, but he didn't get to finish as Buffy's lips were on his.

All thoughts fled from his mind as he poured all the love he could into the kiss. It was a more reassuring kiss than anything, making sure that both of them were there, that they were both alright, and that they still had each other.

When Buffy finally pulled away, she took his hand and led him to the small bed in the corner of the room. Angel sat down and looked at her curiously, wondering what she was planning to do exactly, because he didn't know if he was up to what it seemed like she had in mind.

"Buffy—," Angel hesitated when she ripped open his shirt and slid it off his shoulders.

Buffy smirked, "Relax. I'm just going to take care of you."

"How, exactly?" Angel said worriedly.

Buffy laughed, "I'm going to take a look at your battle scars," she clarified.

Angel relaxed, though he was still slightly disappointed. "Oh."

"Yeah," Buffy grinned, shaking her head as she wringed out a wet cloth and began to clean the wounds. Angel hissed when she began to clean the wound on his shoulder.

Buffy was no longer smiling. "What happened?" she asked softly.

Angel shrugged. "He didn't want to let go."

"You mean…" Buffy faltered as she comprehended what he meant. "He bit you?"

"Starving vampires will attack anything that has blood—even other vampires," Angel answered grimly.

"How many were there?" Buffy asked quietly.

"Eight," Angel replied. "It wasn't too bad—half of them ended up turning on each other."

They were both silent as Buffy finished cleaning out the wounds. Buffy left him sitting on the bed as she moved across the room to dig throug his bag. Finding the object of her search, she grabbed the clean shirt and handed it to him. Angel put it on, but left it unbuttoned, not wanting the material to stick to his wounds, particularly the nasty claw marks on his chest.

Buffy came over to stand in front of him. Wanting her closer, Angel put his hands on her hips and pulled her between his legs. He buried his face in her stomach as he felt Buffy gently run her hands over his shoulders and down his back in a soothing motion.

"Buffy," Angel whispered, his eyes closed as he soaked up her scent. Bits of the Review began to filter through his mind, and he was suddenly overwhelmed by how amazing Buffy truly was.

"I never wanted you to know," Angel said softly, his fingers digging into her hips slightly. "At least…not like that."

"I know you wouldn't do those things," Buffy consoled truthfully, though she had to fight back a shudder as Travers' tales flashed through her mind.

"Where you ever going to tell me?" Buffy asked. "About the Slayers you'd killed?"

Angel's fingers dug into her hips almost painfully before he relaxed. He pulled away to look at her face. Buffy was troubled. She was worried, she was concerned, maybe a little angry…but nowhere did he see revulsion at what he'd done. It shouldn't have surprised him, but it did. He'd killed three of her predecessors. Three girls that, like her, had given up their lives to fight evil—like him.

"I—," Angel thought about lying, but decided that Buffy deserved the truth. "No."

"Why?" Buffy asked hurt. "Don't you think I deserve to know?"

"I was afraid of what you'd think," Angel admitted quietly. "I'm selfish enough to want you to stay with me."

Comprehension dawned on Buffy, and she was awash with sympathy. Buffy didn't think she'd fully realized how lonely Angel had been until now. Well, she'd known subconsciously, but Angel himself had never really voiced it. "I wouldn't leave you," Buffy shook her head softly. "Wild horses couldn't pull me away."

A knock sounded on the door and both Buffy and Angel looked up as it swung open revealing Wesley and Giles. They both separated as the two Watchers came into the room. Angel got up and stood in front of the fire place, while Buffy immediately went to Giles and threw her arms around him.

"Don't scare me like that again," she scolded as she held her father-figure tight.

Giles held her for a moment, before stepping back slightly, his hands on her shoulders. "I'm sorry," he apologized.

"Remind me never to get you angry," Buffy joked half-heartedly, and Giles' lips quirked up in a barely-there smile.

Wesley stood in the room awkwardly for a moment before tentatively taking a few steps towards Angel and the fireplace. Meanwhile, Giles didn't hesitate to plop down in a chair at the table.

"There's another chair," Buffy hinted teasingly, amused by his awkwardness. Wesley smiled slightly. "I'd prefer to stand, thank you. It saves time should I feel the need to pace."

"You and Angel should get along great then," Buffy said, shooting a half-smile in Angel's direction that he didn't see because he was too busy staring broodingly into the flames.

Buffy frowned slightly, and Wesley spoke. "Well, we're sort of already acquainted."

"Huh?"

"Yes, well," Wesley looked a bit embarrassed. "After talking with both you and Mr. Giles I was…"

"Curious," Angel finished for him, though he was still staring into the flickering flames.

"Yes," Wesley conceded. "While talking with Angel I deduced that you were in a relationship."

"How'd you make that leap?" Buffy wondered. "You're a Watcher. You don't make those kinds of leaps."

"Ah, but Watchers are observant," Wesley replied, his eyes dropped to her hands. "Your Claddagh rings gave you away."

Buffy glanced down to her left hand. "Oh…I didn't even think about that."

"But no one else noticed," Giles spoke up. "Which is a good thing."

"We would have been screwed," Buffy agreed, but then revised her statement. "We're already screwed though. I'm really not likin' how things are going," she said looking at Giles. "You're fired, Angel almost got killed. _Twice_. And I _really_ don't think they like me too much."

"Ah, yes," Giles said, nodding. "That would be true."

"But they also know that you're the best," Wesley informed her. "There hasn't been a Slayer in centuries that has done what you have managed to do in so short an amount of time."

"Yeah, but I live on a Hellmouth…really no shortage of action there," Buffy shrugged.

"While true, that doesn't detract from what you've done," Wesley returned. "When the Council admits that they're impressed, you should take it as a compliment."

Buffy scoffed. "I'll pass."

"I think we should discuss what we came to discuss," Giles interrupted, getting back on task.

"Yes," Wesley nodded. "You're right Mr. Giles."

"Don't call me Mr. Giles," Giles shook his head. "I am not that old. 'Giles' is just fine."

Wesley nodded, though it seemed as though he didn't quite want to relinquish the propriety. "My apologies…Giles."

"So what kind of prophecy are you raving about?" Buffy asked curiously, glancing at Angel out of the corner of her eye, but he was still staring into the fire.

"Well, it's really quite something," Wesley said excitedly. "The Scrolls themselves are an exquisite find, nearly priceless. I was translating them before you came here, you see. Just got my hands on them, and then Mr. Giles—"

"—Giles."

"Ah, yes, my apologies," Wesley said quickly, but sincerely. "As I was saying, Giles was brought to my room, because as you already know he's been rooming with me since you arrived. Anyway, we began to look over them you see…"

"These are the scrolls you mentioned?" Buffy interrupted. "Earlier today?"

"The very same," Wesley said excitedly. "Anyway, I was up most of the night translating, as Giles needed the sleep for the Review this morning. Then once, he, um, was removed from the Review, he sat down and began translating. I was down talking with Angel at the time, and then he was led up to the Review so I returned to my quarters and Giles is saying that there's a prophecy about a vampire with a soul—"

"Angel," Buffy finished, a light shining in her eyes. Of course, she'd already known this. Wesley had already told the Council when he'd arrived a dashing five minutes after the big fight. But now, away from all the chaos, the words seemed to ring truer than before. "It's about Angel."

"We believe so," Giles nodded.

"And then," Wesley continued undaunted, barely pausing at the interruption. He was like a child telling his parents about the coolest, most exciting new toy available. "And then he showed it to me, and I translated it myself and got the same thing! Although, we did have trouble with one word. You see, if it was all about 'Shanshu.' It's rooted in so many different languages, and most all of them mean 'death.'"

"Angel's going to die?" Buffy interrupted worriedly. "What? When? Where? How?"

"But then I remembered that 'Shanshu' was first derived from the Proto-Bantu who believed that life and death were the same thing! Part of a cycle, only a thing that is not alive never dies! It's saying that you get to live until you die!" Wesley explained excitedly.

Buffy was confused. Didn't everyone live until they died? Giles saw Buffy's confused expression, and made things simple. "What it's saying Buffy, is that Angel, once he fulfills his destiny, will become human. It's his reward."

Buffy gasped and looked at Angel, who had yet to look up during the entire conversation.

Angel had been listening, following every word, his mind reeling. But the moment Wesley had begun raving about living until you died…the different connotations had not gone over Angel's head. His thoughts had begun to slow when he'd comprehended. And then his thoughts had practically grinded to a halt when Giles had confirmed it. When he'd said 'It's his reward,' Angel's brain had ceased to function coherently.

Shanshu.

Human.

Buffy.

Destiny.

Human.

Shanshu.

Prophecy.

Human.

Buffy.

Human.

Shanshu.

Destiny.

Reward.

Human.

Buffy.

Reward.

None of it made sense. Why would he deserve a reward? How could he ever do enough good to even deserve a reward? It didn't make sense. It wasn't right.

But he could be human—one day.

Buffy. Human. Shanshu. Reward.

Gift.

Angel didn't deserve that gift though? Him? Human, with Buffy? Not after all he'd done.

After all, the prophecy apparently didn't give an exact time and date. Buffy could be long gone before it was fulfilled, if it ever was.

"Angel."

Angel looked at Buffy who had crossed the room to stand beside him. He could see it in her eyes. The hope. The hope that one day, maybe, possibly, they could truly be together. Human. Alive. He could give her everything he wanted to. The white picket fence, the roses, children, afternoon picnics…all the clichés that people laughed at or took for granted. They could have it all.

"Angel, say something," Buffy pleaded quietly. "Do you know what this means?"

"It could mean a lot of things," Angel answered looking away from her and staring into the fire.

"You could be human," Buffy whispered excitedly. "Isn't it great?"

"We don't know a time," Angel told her, a hint of sadness in his voice. "It could be centuries from now."

That seemed to deflate Buffy's enthusiasm a little. "Don't be like that."

"It's a possibility," Giles spoke up, and Buffy shot him a betrayed glare, like she thought he was siding with Angel. "The prophecy does not specify the date."

"Would it kill you two to be just a little optimistic?" Buffy asked exasperatedly.

"I don't deserve it Buffy," Angel said quietly, yet resigned. "It must be talking about someone else."

"No other vampire has a soul," Buffy glared at him, anger building in her veins at his refusal to be happy.

"That we know of," Angel replied easily, not looking at her, continuing to stare into the orange flames.

"It might just be me, but I'm rooting for Angel," Wesley spoke up, offering his opinion.

Angel suddenly turned to face the new Watcher. "Why are you helping us anyway?" he asked. "You have no reason to, yet you're talking to all of us. You went down into the dungeons to talk to me and found out that I loved Buffy, but you didn't tell anyone. You translated this, stopped the Review…why?"

Wesley suddenly grew serious. "When I became a Watcher, I wanted to do good. The supernatural had always interested me as a child. I knew of the evils in the world. I wanted to be able to do something about them, whether by translating a vital piece of ancient text or literally fighting them head on. That's what I thought I was doing, and I was. But…this Review, seeing the real world, so to speak. Seeing that real life doesn't adhere to the rules you make…I'd become closed off I think. I'd forgotten what it was like to be open to…everything really."

Wesley seemed to square his shoulders. "I'm loyal to the Council. I believe in what they do…but I must be loyal to myself—something I think I'd forgotten."

"So…friends?" Buffy summarized.

"I'd like to think so," Wesley smiled nervously. "I haven't really had a friend in some time…"

"Well we can't have that," Buffy smiled. "Welcome to the Scooby Gang."

Wesley looked puzzled at the name, but grateful nonetheless.

"Yes, well, I suppose it's time we leave," Giles sighed as he got up from his chair. "Travers and his minions will be working for hours checking and quadruple checking our translations. We're right of course, but they will try and find every way to prove us wrong. I suspect you can count to sleep in late tomorrow."

"My favorite pastime," Buffy said with a smile as she saw Giles and Wesley to the door. It swung open, and Buffy saw a Watcher on the other side. Wesley and Giles walked through the barrier and the door immediately slammed shut.

Angel was still standing at the fire place when Buffy turned around. She walked over to him and placed a gentle hand on his chest, conscious of his wounds. "I wish you'd be more optimistic."

"I don't deserve that gift Buffy," Angel shook his head sadly. "I've done nothing—I will never be able to do enough to be granted that gift."

"Don't you want it?" Buffy questioned softly.

Angel raised his hand and caressed her cheek. "To be human? With you? It's the best dream."

"Dreams can become reality," Buffy said knowingly.

"Maybe," Angel conceded. "I just don't deserve it."

Buffy shrugged. "No, you don't deserve it," she agreed.

If Angel was going to be difficult, so was she. Honestly, she believed he deserved Shanshu now. But what was more important was that Angel realized he deserved it. In a moment of insight, Buffy realized that Angel needed his own quest, his own journey of self-discovery. He needed to grow to believe in himself. Maybe when that happened...maybe that was when he would Shanshu.

Buffy was torn from her thoughts when she registered Angel's confusion by her sudden change of opinion.

Buffy smiled softly to assauge him and added, "But one day...one day I think you'll do something truly great. And then when you've overcome all that you can...then you'll deserve it."

Angel stared at her in wonder for a moment, amazed at her faith in him. "You're amazing."

"So are you," Buffy returned sincerely, but with a hint of a knowning smile playing at her lips. "You just don't know it yet."

* * *

><p><strong>Can everybody go "AWWWW?" Aren't they just sweet as can be? I figured we needed a little bit of fluff. After this maelstrom of drama...yep, fluff was needed!<strong>

**Review and make my day,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: Hello, beautiful people! How are you on this terribly, awful, despair-enducing Monday? Can you tell I don't like Mondays? The only thing that gets me through them is the knowledge that to get to Friday, I must get through Monday...**

**Okay, on to more important things! Buffy! Angel! Watchers! Wesley! Giles! Scoobies! They are ALL in this chapter! I'm excited. Are you excited? :D**

**On a slightly depressing note, which is most definitely deserving of some hardcore brooding, my life has been hectic. The past three weekends I've been too busy to write. Then, during the week, I'm too busy with schoolwork to write. I keep thinking it will lighten up, but something else comes up. Like starting this week I thought it would get a lot better...except that we were assigned a book in English last week and have to have read to pg. 110 and answer the corresponding questions to each chapter by Wednesday. So, I'll be busy doing that. Shouldn't take me too long, I mean, after all, I read and write and breathe (that's my life in a nutshell). Anywho, the point in this congealed mess is that I only have two chapters already written left. Which means that after chapter 20 (there's 6 more chaps after that), I've got nothin' and I have no idea when I'll have the time to make that nothin' a somethin'.**

**This is just my warning to you that after the next two chapters, updates probably won't be every day. They'll be whenever I barter enough time with the PTB to write a coherent chapter. Just a warning. **

**And on that just gloriously happy note (previous line to be read with great sarcasm), let's get on with the chapter!**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy).**

**Buffy: Okay, can I go home now?**

**Booth: Are you being held against your will?**

**Buffy: Angel, look! It's the older you again!**

**Angel: And it's still as creepy as last time.**

**Booth: (to Angel) Hey, come on, we're a good looking guy.**

**Brennan: Your facial symmetry is quite pleasing. I've told you this before, Booth.**

**Booth: (grins) Apparently, we have great acromion. That's the squinty word for shoulders.**

_**Me: (sighs dreamily) Yeah...wait? What are you guys doing in a BTVS disclaimer? Gah, I have to stop watching all those BONES promos...**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 18<p>

This time when Buffy woke, she was much, much more comfortable than the previous morning. She was still in the same small bed, but this time she had company. With a sleepy smile, Buffy turned her head so that it was buried in Angel's good shoulder.

Angel himself was already awake and had been for a while. His mind hadn't wanted to rest, so he'd contented himself with holding Buffy in his arms and feeling her chest rise and fall against him. He heard her breathing speed up and knew that she was awake. Absently, he began trailing his fingers up and down her arm.

"I don't want to move," Buffy said sleepily, burrowing deeper into his shoulder.

Angel smiled slightly. "We have to. We've got to get this over with."

"That," Buffy sighed. "Is a good point…ten more minutes?"

"Five."

"Seven."

"Deal," Angel grinned as he turned on his side, wincing slightly at the pain the movement caused.

Buffy looked at his chest, taking in the three long scratch marks that were red and jagged. Her gaze drifted up to his shoulder, which didn't look much better. Then there were the two holes from the crossbow bolts, one on his shoulder and the other on his bicep.

"You're not healing as fast as normal," Buffy observed softly, lightly trailing her fingers over his chest.

"Tired," Angel answered easily, not really wanting to discuss the real reason. "Not really been living the life lately."

"You haven't had any blood since we left California," Buffy saw right through his little white lie. "And you've lost blood fighting."

Angel sighed and rolled onto his back. "It's no big deal. I've gone longer without it."

"Maybe I can get Giles to sneak you some," Buffy said, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper.

"Yeah, I bet the Watchers will really support that idea," Angel replied dryly. "I doubt they'd even let him leave."

"Wes then," Buffy shrugged as much as she could lying down. "Trust me, I can totally make this work."

"Just let it go Buffy," Angel said as he sat up and got out of bed, walking over to the fireplace and stoking the flames back to life.

Buffy sat up in the bed, wrapping her arms around her knees. She laid her head down on her arms and watched Angel move around the room, pulling on a shirt and beginning to pace.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked softly, causing Angel to halt his pacing and look at her.

His gaze softened when he saw her, looking so small in an already small bed. Angel crossed the room and sat down on the bed beside her, putting his arm around her and pulling her close. He placed a soft kiss on her temple, before pulling back to look at her.

"I'm just worried," Angel admitted honestly. "About you, this Review," he sighed. "Giles is fired. They have the power to keep you here if they choose. The prophecy, well, I don't even want to think about that too much."

"Not worried about yourself?" Buffy asked before answering her own question. "Of course not."

Angel gave her a rueful smile.

They were both silent for a moment and Buffy laid her head on his shoulder. "I'm scared, Angel," she whispered and Angel held her tighter.

"I know."

* * *

><p>Giles, Buffy, and Angel stood before the Council, each of them wearing a different expression.<p>

Giles was steady and calm on the surface, yet there was a worried light in his eye. He refused to show anything more, as he knew that whatever verdict was reached, he would be going with Buffy one way or another. Loyalty was indeed something he possessed, and Buffy had secured it steadfast a long time ago.

Buffy was nervous. Her eyes darted among the faces of the Watchers that she had dubbed the jurors in her mind. Some of them looked bored, some excited, others looked at her with a mixture of confusion and fascination as they continued to glance between her and Angel.

Angel was solemn. His gaze never wavered from Travers as he watched the man gather himself and his notes that Angel knew for a fact he didn't need. They were just for show, much like Travers himself. Whatever the outcome of this Review, as long as Buffy was alright Angel didn't care what circumstances befell him.

Travers finished his whispered conversation with his peers and turned to face the three before him. In his hand he held the Scrolls of Aberjian. "Let the record state that the concluding date of the Review of Slayer Buffy Anne Summers was the twenty-first of July, 1998."

Travers waited a moment before delving into the matter at hand. "Buffy Summers, you are aware of your charges?"

"Yes."

"Just to clarify," Travers began. "You, knowing the illegality of your actions, told civilians of your Calling?"

"Yes."

"And you completely disregarded the Handbook?" Travers pursued.

"Yes."

"And last, but certainly not least, did you allow the vampire Angelus to live when you had the chance to kill him?"

"Yes."

"Buffy Anne Summers the Council finds you guilty of all charges," Travers replied quickly, but swiftly raised his hand to ward off the protests he knew would come. "However, due to some rather—fortuitous circumstances," he glanced from the Scrolls to Angel before settling his gaze on Buffy. "The Council is willing to overlook this ruling on the condition that come your eighteenth birthday you submit to a test of your skills and intellect."

Giles' gaze immediately hardened, but he remained silent.

"Miss Summers, do you agree?" Travers inquired in a clipped tone.

Buffy glanced from Giles to Angel and then back at Travers. "Yes."

"Is that all?" Giles asked coldly. "Or are we free to go?"

"Not just yet," Travers smiled slightly, an anticipatory light in his eye. "There are two more matters to discuss. The first, being the Scrolls of Aberjian and Angelus."

Travers gaze settled on Angel. "As I'm sure you are all aware, the idea that the Watcher's Council would simply let a vampire walk out of our headquarters is completely ludicrous. However, after a very thorough examination of Mr. Wyndam-Pryce's translations, we have come to agree that the Scrolls do indeed refer to a vampire with a soul who, one day, upon completing his destiny, will become human."

"Because of this," Travers said heavily as if it were almost physically painful for him to speak his next words. "Because of this, the Council is willing to let the vampire Angelus live…"

Buffy gasped, her heartbeat skyrocketing as she waited for Travers to finish.

"…as long as he never, by whatever means, loses his soul again," Travers finished. "We will be Watching," he warned.

Travers suddenly smiled, his favorite announcement on the tip of his tongue. "And I believe our last matter to discuss is Mr. Giles' replacement."

Buffy wanted to interrupt, saying that no one could ever replace Giles and she refused to call anyone else her Watcher, but things were going so well, and she didn't think it would be a good idea to test the already rough waters.

Travers, obviously expecting (and hoping) for an outburst was slightly disappointed when there was none, and continued, "We have chosen a replacement that we think will benefit you highly. He's one of our brightest and most loyal Watchers and follows the Handbook to the letter."

Buffy felt her heart drop. _Crap._

"Mr. Wesley Wyndam-Pryce."

Buffy fought to control her expression, because frankly she was on the verge of jumping up and down and doing a ridiculously relieved happy dance. Wes! Someone, somewhere, was on her side.

Deciding to play the part that Travers obviously wanted to see, Buffy frowned and made a decidedly unhappy face, looking at Wesley, who had entered the room when his name was called. Seeing her frown, Wesley himself frowned, as if he too was not thrilled by the situation.

"Mr. Giles," Travers said. "You will not interfere with Mr. Wyndam-Pryce's job, is that clear? If you do, the Watchers can see to it that you are deported and will never see Miss Summers again."

"I'll stay out of his way, if he stays out of mine," Giles replied evenly.

Travers seemed to look around for a moment before seeming to shrug. "The Review of Buffy Anne Summers is officially concluded. Good day."

* * *

><p>It was a very quiet flight back to California, as all of them were tired. Not wanting to fully miss the sightseeing opportunities that London offered, Buffy had begged and pleaded to have Giles show her around. Angel had accompanied them, seeing as how it was a rather cloudy day out, and they had umbrellas just in case. Wesley had declined to go with them, stating that he needed to pack and prepare for their journey.<p>

Buffy decided that Wesley, while he had the potential to be pretty cool, was in a desperate need to live on the wild side just a little. Buffy wondered how she could help facilitate this…maybe a nice leather jacket? Not too edgy, but definitely a few points up in the 'cool factor.' She'd have to go gently with him.

After sufficiently traversing London, well, as much as you could traverse in a day, they had all met at the airport and taken the Watchers private jet back to California. After all, it was only fair.

Buffy slept most of the way, her head resting on Angel's now healed shoulder (somewhere along the line he'd managed to sneak off and find some blood). Angel held one of Wesley's books in his hands, flipping through the pages, only reading half of the words on the page before turning to the next.

Buffy's warm breath on his neck was a distraction, although a pleasant one.

When they finally landed, the Scoobies and Joyce were waiting for them.

"Buffy!" Willow smiled brightly, throwing her arms around her jet-lagged best friend. "We were so worried!"

"I'm fine Wills," Buffy hugged the redhead back, and then pulled away only to be pulled into another hug by her mother.

"I missed you," Joyce whispered as she stroked her daughter's hair. "How was London?"

"Rainy, old, but kinda cool," Buffy answered with a tired smile. "It had the whole 'history' vibe goin' for it."

"Did you see the London Bridge? Or the Tower of London? Big Ben? St. Paul's?" Willow asked excitedly.

"I promise you details Will," Buffy said, slightly overwhelmed by her friend's enthusiasm. "But…later, okay?"

"Oh, yeah, I here jet lag is really bad," Willow said nodding. "Of course, I've only ever flown once, and I was real little so I don't remember it. But I always liked to think it was a fairly awesome experience."

Buffy just nodded, and looked past them. Xander offered her a little wave and a nervous smile, "Hey Buff."

"Hey Xander," Buffy smiled, glad there didn't seem to be a confrontation in the works. She was way too tired for that.

"Uh, who's that guy?" Cordelia asked, pointing a finger at Wesley, who was staring at her like she had a halo over her head (which didn't bother Cordelia one bit).

"Oh, that's my new Watcher," Buffy answered. "Say hi Wes."

"Hi." Wesley made a little awkward wave, his eyes straying from Cordelia for a moment before he seemed to collect himself. He cleared his throat, "Um, yes, Wesley Wyndam-Pryce…that's me."

Oz leaned over and whispered in Willow's ear. "I'm getting a hootenanny vibe."

"Uh huh," Willow whispered back.

* * *

><p>Buffy tossed her bag in the corner of her room, changed into her pajamas robotically, and then fell into bed. Even though she'd slept on the plane, she still felt like she'd tried to run a hundred miles. All she wanted to do was sleep.<p>

An hour later she was _still_ trying to go to sleep.

After tossing to her opposite side for the twentieth time, Buffy finally huffed in frustration and threw back the covers, nearly jumping out of bed. She quickly put on some tennis shoes before quietly opening her window and slipping out.

Buffy walked carefully along the roof and then hopped into the tree in front of her house, climbing down until her feet touched the grass. Quickly, she made her way to Angel's apartment.

Buffy's fist had barely touched the door before Angel had opened it and pulled her inside. They held each other for a long moment, before Buffy murmured, "I can't sleep."

"Me either," Angel replied before kissing her lips, slowly backing her towards the bed.

Home, sweet home.

* * *

><p><strong>Everybody go, Awwwwww...yes, I know, I'm spoiling you guys with the fluff. But hey, like I said last chapter, fluff is definitely deserved after all this drama!<strong>

**But, alas, the drama is just around the corner! We start with rewriting episodes next chapter! "Faith, Hope, and Trick" is up to bat!**

**Oh, and I'm thinkin...I, during a weekend long ago, wrote the first five chapters of the AISHB sequel. I'm thinking that to get you guys all hyped up for it, I might give you a line from a chapter in my following ANs. What do you think?**

**Just to give you a little taste, cause I'm anxious myself to post that story:**

**This is from Chapter 5..."We're in this together." - Angel**

**Wonder to what that may refer? :D**

**Reviews make my day,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: Well, here we are! And so the rewriting of episodes begins! I only chose to rewrite 9 episodes, and two of those will be combined into one because Angel and Buffy are together, together and I think it will just flow better. So...that said...there's not much of this story left! This episode rewrite ended up being two chapters like the ones in AISHB, but I don't know if the rest will be that long. I might be able to do them in one chapter. Because honestly, I want to get to the sequel to AISHB! I've got 5 chappies under my belt for that story and I love them! I've created my own character (really think you guys will like her), and everything about the sequel is just fantabulous so far, and it's got me all giddy! **

**Okay, I'm getting a little too carried away...let's focus on this story for the moment, shall we? :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Okay, people! Listen up!**_

**Faith: Who is this chick?**

_**Me: Oh, I'm the one who controls your destiny! Nice to meet ya!**_

**Faith: No one controls me. I'll do what I want.**

_**Me: Yeah, well, we'll see about that...I do want to be friends, though.**_

**Faith: As long as you don't have me do anything crazy, we're five-by-five.**

_**Me: (giggles, but then looks away) Sure...**_

**Buffy: Who's she?**

_**Me: Oh, she's your sister.**_

**Buffy: I don't have a sister.**

_**Me: Sister-Slayer, I mean.**_

**Dawn: Yes she does have a sister! Me!**

_**Me: Dawn? What are you doing in this season?**_

**Dawn: I'm here to complain! You haven't written me into your sequel yet! Five chapters you've written and I'm not in one of them!**

_**Me: Sorry! I promise you're in chapter 6!**_

**Wesley: Will someone please explain what's going on?**

_**Me: Uh...no. Don't have time. This disclaimer ended up being much longer than intended.**_

**Wesley: (pouts) Bollocks.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 19<p>

"Faith, Hope, and Trick"

The rest of the summer was spent mending relationships.

Buffy and Angel eventually managed to fight about everything they needed to, and came out of it stronger and with a better understanding of each other. They weren't perfect, and for once they didn't try to be. Angel was on his way to accepting the gift he'd been given, a permanent soul and Buffy. Buffy was working toward a new maturity and understanding of life in general. They were both making progress.

Xander had been troublesome. He and Buffy had fought and fought and fought until they were fighting about fighting. Buffy was reduced to tears, and that's when Angel had cut in.

Buffy still didn't know what Angel had said to Xander, but they hadn't fought since.

Willow was closer to Buffy than ever. The past months had torn them apart and brought them back together at the same time. Willow was the constant in Buffy's life. Boy talk, sleepovers, double fudge chocolate mint-chip ice cream. Day to day girly activities that let Buffy be a seventeen year old girl.

Oz and Angel had struck up an odd sort of friendship. One night, Angel had slipped out of bed without Buffy noticing and had gone out. It was just one of those things he did sometimes. Can't sleep, go skulk around the cemeteries or the woods, maybe stake a vamp along the way. Only this time he hadn't run into a vamp. He'd run into a werewolf, specifically Oz, who seemed to be set on attacking a man with a gun.

Using all his skills and just a little bit of luck he didn't know he had, Angel had managed to save the guy with the gun from Oz, and subsequently save Oz from the guy with the gun. When the guy had regained consciousness, Angel had learned that his name was Cain and that he was a werewolf hunter. Of course, then Cain had tried to kill Angel, who in turn knocked him unconscious again, and tossed him in his truck.

By the end of that night, Angel had managed to save Oz, get him back to cage in the library, fix the cage, get back to his apartment, slide into bed, and pull Buffy into his arms—all without her knowing. Angel considered it one of his best lurking/sneaking moments and was quite proud of himself.

Angel had also found another ally in Wesley. After a few weeks, Wesley had grown confident enough to strike up a conversation with Angel, and to really try and get to know him. Not the Angel or Angelus that Wesley knew from books, but the _real_ Angel. This was just _slightly_ intimidating. Sure, he'd talked to Angel in London…but Angel had been in a cell, far from strangling distance...well, for the most part…

It was odd to Angel, but he found himself developing a sort of brotherly love for the young Watcher. Buffy joked that he must be rubbing off on Wesley because within weeks of coming to Sunnydale, Wesley had bought a leather jacket. Buffy thought it was a step in the right direction, while Angel worried how far Wesley would take the 'leather is cool and badass' look.

Giles was quiet and observant. He simply watched, mentally taking notes. Physically, he was healed. Emotionally, he was still mending. Angel hadn't stepped out of the line Giles had drawn yet, and that was good for both Angel and Giles.

The rest of Giles' time was spent with Wesley, the two Englishmen banding together to drink tea and read old books among other Watcher-y things. They both sat down at the end of each month and wrote up the report together, carefully omitting certain details of the happenings of Sunnydale. Although the Council know knew what went on in Sunnydale, both in Buffy's Slaying and personal life, Giles and Wesley didn't think they could be too careful, and though a part of Wesley was still hesitant to 'lie' to an organization that he had believed in for so long, a larger part of him felt a strong sense of loyalty to the first true friends he'd had.

The summer months gave way to fall and then it was time for school to resume…for everyone except Buffy.

Snyder was being a big pain in the ass. He was refusing to let Buffy back into school, even if the murder charges against Buffy had long ago been dropped. It was because he didn't like her and nothing more. Giles had 'talked' to him, and Buffy was pretty sure Angel had done something to scare him because Willow had come home saying that Snyder had been looking over his shoulder every few seconds and jumping at anything that was unexpected.

When confronted with this information Angel firmly denied doing anything to scare Snyder; and Buffy would probably have believed him if it weren't for the childish, mischievous glee shining in his eyes.

All of this led to the reason that Buffy was spreading out a blanket on the grass, setting up a picnic lunch right across from the school. Seniors were allowed to eat off campus, and Buffy knew that Willow, while nervous about getting in trouble, would still be unable to deny the thrill of breaking a previous rule that no longer applied to her. She was a senior! They were all seniors. Well, Buffy supposed that technically she wasn't a senior…but she was in spirit and that's what counted.

Buffy took care to spread the food out along the blanket, leaving room for people to sit if they so chose. She'd made all the tasty treats herself and she was quite proud, especially since Angel had been with her at the time and had thought it was funny to distract her in a variety of ways.

Buffy smiled to herself as she continued to lay out the food on the blanket. One of the many things she was enjoying about a permanently ensouled Angel was his playful side. It was a side of him that she was just truly discovering and she loved it. Angel's playful moments were currently few, but Buffy committed each one to memory and hoped that as time went on she'd see a playful Angel more often.

Soft footsteps on the grass and laughing voices on the wind reached Buffy's ears, and she looked up as her friends made their way toward her. Buffy was hit with a brief flash of longing when she saw them coupled off—Xander with Cordelia, and then Oz with Willow, but she shook it off. She'd see Angel in just a few hours, less depending on how long she stayed or if she decided to sneak into the library to surprise Wes and Giles.

"Buffy," Xander smiled as he sat down on the blanket. "Banned from campus, but not from our hearts! How are you, and what's for lunch?"

"Oh, I just threw a few things together," Buffy shrugged with a grin as she remembered a particular instance with flour and Angel.

"When did you become Martha Stewart?" Cordelia asked, sounding mildly impressed to Buffy's ears.

Buffy smirked. "First of all, Martha Stewart knows jack about hand-cut prosciutto," she said as she passed out water bottles.

"I don't believe she slays either," Xander quipped with an easy smile, not a trace of his previous antagonism present on his features.

"Oh, I hear she can, but she doesn't like to," Oz spoke up calmly before taking a sip of his drink.

Buffy didn't know whether Oz was serious or not, but she just rolled with it, and shrugged. "Second of all," she said as she twisted the lid off her drink. "Why waste too much time on my hands since I got kicked out of school?"

Willow raised her eyebrows at Buffy, a small knowing smile pulling at her lips. Buffy caught her eye and blushed ever so slightly. They'd recently had a girls night, complete with boy talk…which had ended up being an Angel talk, which meant that Willow knew stuff that only best friends know. Buffy was beginning to wonder if she'd said too much, and Willow would forever have the best blackmail.

"Oh, I know they'll let you back in," Willow smiled before taking a drink.

Xander, completely oblivious to his two best friends' shared look asked, "Don't you and your mom have a meeting with Principal Snyder?"

Buffy frowned. "We're seeing Snyde-Man tomorrow."

Willow's eyes lit up mischievously as she spotted a particular someone. "Ooo, Scott Hope at eleven o' clock," she said playfully, causing Buffy to raise her eyebrows and follow Willow's line of sight.

"He likes you," Willow said in a teasing, sing-song voice. "He wanted to ask you out last year, you know."

Buffy rolled her eyes, giving Scott one last look before helping herself to some prosciutto. "Huh," she said noncommittally, wondering idly if Angel was still at her house or if he'd managed to get back to his apartment.

"He's going to come over here," Cordelia said knowingly, causing Xander to look at her. "What?" Cordelia shrugged at his questioning look. "I just see these types of things happening, okay?"

"You're not psychic," Xander shook his head, but nonetheless grinned at her. "Bet you five bucks he won't come over."

Cordelia scoffed, but shrugged. "Fine, you owe me five bucks then."

Sure enough, not two minutes later, Scott started to make his way over to them. Buffy looked at Willow, wide-eyed. "What do I do?"

"Do that thing with your mouth that boys like," Willow answered, immediately backtracking when she saw Buffy's scandalized, yet somewhat embarrassed look. "I didn't mean the _bad_ thing you do with your mouth," Willow said quickly. "I meant the little half-smile…" she trailed off to faux glare at Oz. "You're supposed to stop me when I do that," she scolded.

Oz merely smiled. "I like it when you do that."

Scott reached them then, but only stopped for a moment. "Hi, Buffy," he smiled looking slightly nervous.

"Hi," Buffy returned with a slight smile that probably came off as shy.

They were all quiet as they watched Scott Hope walk away. Once he was out of earshot, Willow spoke up. "I think that went well," she said. "Don't you think? Did you do that little half-smile thing?" she joked.

"Look at Buff," Xander shook his head with mock solemnity. "Unwittingly snaring Scott Hope with just a little half-smile, you little slut," he teased, laughing when Buffy punched him in the arm. A second after the initial contact though, Xander realized he was in true pain. "Okay, ow," he complained half-heartedly, rubbing his arm.

"Ha ha," Buffy deadpanned, before rolling her eyes and sending a smile Xander's way. "I'm in a very happy relationship. It's a forever kind of thing."

* * *

><p>An easy going beat resounded off the walls of the Bronze, and Buffy couldn't stop smiling. The day had turned out better than she'd hoped. She'd woken up to Angel kissing his way down her body (what a fantastic way to wake up!). After a particularly passionate session of love making, Buffy had willed her happily sated self out of bed, despite Angel's protests and started making lunch for her friends. Of course, Angel had then decided that he'd try to distract her. A kiss here, a whispered word there…but Buffy had managed. Angel, not to be diverted or ignored, began a more straightforward approach. Like flicking flour in her face when she turned around to put the milk back in the fridge…this had resulted half a bag of flour ending up on Angel's head.<p>

Lunch had gone great. It had been fun talking to her friends and just hanging out. When the bell had rung, Buffy had gone with her mother to see Snyder. Summers' women were no match for men, and both Buffy and Joyce put Snyder in his sniveling place. Buffy was back in school.

After the meeting, Buffy had asked her mother to drop her off at Angel's apartment, which, to Joyce's credit, did not cause an argument. When Joyce had first discovered that Buffy spent the vast majority of her nights with Angel, she'd been concerned. Was it healthy? Didn't they want a little space every now and then? Of course, what Joyce was _really_ avoiding was what she knew was happening when Buffy went over to Angel's apartment. As a mother, she really didn't want to think about her daughter having sex with her two-hundred and something year-old ensouled vampire boyfriend.

"Do you see them?" Buffy asked Angel as they wound their way through the crowd, looking for their friends.

Angel scanned the crowd, and spotted the back of Willow's head. "There," he said as he took her hand and began to lead her forward.

Buffy swayed slightly to the music, and Angel couldn't help but smile at the sight. He loved watching her dance, and often wondered what it would be like to dance with her. They'd really only danced once, and it hadn't been a real dance, just a gentle sway to a slow song.

Angel knew how to dance. Waltz. Tango. Quickstep. All the classics. But dancing had changed…a lot. The idea of teaching Buffy to waltz popped into his head, immediately followed by Buffy in a beautiful dress and Angel decided that eventually, he would make that idea reality.

As they neared the booth, they saw that Oz and Willow occupied one side, although at the moment they were currently more occupied with each other. Lips were getting busy.

Buffy smirked as they approached, noticing that neither Oz nor Willow had noticed their arrival. She knew what it was like to be completely oblivious to the world, instead focusing solely on one person. In her case, this person was Angel. In Willow's case, this person was most definitely Oz.

"Don't let us interrupt," Buffy smirked as she and Angel slid in to the opposite side of the booth.

Oz and Willow looked up at them, a slightly dazed, happy smile on Willow's face. "Hey, Buffy! Hey, Angel," she greeted cheerily as she took a sip of her drink that was in front of her.

Buffy smirked, "Hello to you too," she greeted as she began swaying to the music again in her seat.

Willow's eyes narrowed slightly and a small smile pulled at the redhead's lips as she studied her friend's face. It was a look she'd come to recognize since Buffy and Angel's return from London. "Are you…" she began before looking at Oz. "Is she all glowy?"

Buffy rolled her eyes, knowing what Willow was alluding to. Willow was right of course, Buffy supposed she was probably glowy. Angel and certain activities tended to bring about glowyness.

"Yeah, I suspect happiness," Oz teased, though he remained completely straight-faced except for the very slight quirk of his lips.

Buffy could have laughed at how embarrassed, and yet smug, Angel looked. She put a comforting hand on his thigh under the table and let her head rest on his shoulder. "Eh, passed my English exam, hangin' with my friends," Buffy told them. It was the truth. Not necessarily the reason she was all glowy—that was all due to the wonderfully talented person beside her. "Hello my life, how I've missed you," Buffy joked.

Suddenly, Willow looked up and smiled. "Hi, Scott."

Both Buffy and Angel looked up. Immediately, Angel sized the boy up, and it took him all of a second to decide that 'Scott' wasn't a threat, just an annoyance. But nonetheless, just for fun and because he could, Angel narrowed his eyes at the boy, silently asking the boy why the hell he was here.

It worked, and Scott immediately looked down and anywhere but Angel. This caused Angel to smirk slightly, and Buffy squeezed his thigh. The action was meant to be a warning, to tell him to stop intimidating Scott…but that wasn't necessarily the first thing that popped into Angel's mind.

"Um, what are you doing here?" Willow asked sounding slightly awkward.

Scott looked up at Willow, grateful to have a safe place to look. He could still feeling Angel's glare on him though, and it really gave him the creeps and the distinct feeling to run for his life. "Uh, you mentioned that you and Buffy would be here tonight…"

"Oh," Willow said lamely, shooting an apologizing glance at Buffy, who was glaring at her.

Scott glanced at Buffy bravely for a moment, but then Angel leaned back in the booth and threw his arm oh, so casually around Buffy's shoulders, pulling her close. Scott promptly lost all the courage he had.

"Um, hi Buffy," he managed, glancing nervously at Angel, noting how he looked like he could snap him like a twig if he so chose. "Bye," he said quickly before scurrying away, feeling like he had just escaped a life threatening situation.

The moment Scott was gone, Buffy glared at Angel. "Why'd you do that?"

"What?" Angel asked innocently.

"You went all possessive, caveman on me," Buffy scolded. "Not very attractive."

"I thought it was," Willow spoke up, and Oz looked at her questioningly.

"Something you want to tell me, baby?" he asked.

"Oh, don't worry," Willow smiled as she gave him a solid kiss on the cheek. "I'm a werewolf kinda girl."

"So should I growl anytime a guy hits on you?" Oz joked half-heartedly.

Willow's eyes lit up. "Could you?"

Oz seemed to debate the question seriously. "For you? Anything."

"Aw, that's so sweet," Buffy smiled teasingly. "Who knew werewolves were so sentimental."

Willow was about to say more, but then Cordelia and Xander arrived.

"Whoa, check out Slut-O-Rama and Disco Dave," Cordelia said pointing looking towards a dark haired girl dressed in black leather who was dancing with a guy that was clearly sporting a seventies vibe, dancing far too fast for the relatively slow song.

"What was the last thing that guy danced to?" Cordelia continued as she and Xander took seats on top of a low table. "K.C. and the Sunshine Band?"

Buffy studied the couple closely, her Slayer sense telling her that all was not as it seemed. Her suspicions were sufficiently confirmed in her mind, when the couple went outside, the possibly undead man saying goodbye to a friend.

"I don't think that guy exactly thrives on sunshine," Buffy stated, glancing at Angel who looked to be thinking along the same lines.

Wordlessly, Angel got out of the booth and waited for Buffy to get out too. Seeing the two of them get up and reading their intentions to follow the couple, Willow and Oz and the rest of the Scoobies followed them out as they went in search for the young couple.

They moved passed Scott, none of them noting his presence except for Angel, who glared in the boy's direction, efficiently sending the meddlesome boy on his way. Really, Angel couldn't blame the boy for liking Buffy. Angel liked Buffy, too…but Buffy was his, and he'd never been one to share. _Buffy was his_.

Once they were outside, Buffy looked around. "Where'd she go?"

Buffy took a few steps down a dark alley, knowing that they were a popular place for vamps to do their feeding—cliché, but effective nevertheless.

"I bet it's nothing," Cordelia said as she looked around and saw nothing. "They're probably just making out."

As if on cue, all of them heard a girl's loud complaining tone, "Hey!"

Immediately, Xander and Angel withdrew a stake. Buffy promptly snatched the stake out of Xander's hands, ignoring his pout. She and Angel glanced at each other and then they were running in the direction of the shout, the Scoobies hurried steps echoing on the pavement behind them.

"That's not what it sounds like," Willow said, referring to Cordelia's earlier comment as they ran behind Buffy. "Unless I'm doing it wrong."

Buffy, Angel, and the Scoobies all rounded the corner just in time to see the dark haired girl deliver a vicious roundhouse kick to the now apparent vamp. The unknown girl looked up, hearing their approach. "It's okay, I got it," she assured them when she saw their stakes. "You're, uh, Buffy, right?"

Buffy stared bewildered at the girl in front of her. How did she know her name? Who was she? Then, Buffy noticed the vampire the girl had been fighting was sneaking up behind her. However, before Buffy could shout a warning, the vamp's arms were around the girl's shoulders. This didn't bother the girl though, and she simply threw her head back, head-butting the offended vamp before twisting his arm behind him and shoving him against the chain-link fence.

The girl looked back up at Buffy as if nothing had happened, though she wore a grin. "I'm Faith."

"I'm just going out on a limb here, but I think there's a new Slayer in town," Oz murmured to Willow, who merely nodded.

Everyone watched as Faith fought the vampire, all of them too shocked to step in and lend a hand. The vampire rolled away from Faith when she flipped him over her shoulder, and Faith took the time to grab the stake from Buffy's hand.

"Mind if I borrow this?" she asked and without waiting for a reply, she took the stake and promptly drove it into the vampire's heart.

All the Scoobies stared at Faith as the vamp dissolved to dust. "Thanks B," Faith grinned, returning the stake, and casting an unmistakable appreciative glance at Angel. "Couldn't have done it without you," she said before walking past them, leaving Buffy, Angel, and Scoobies confused and curious.

* * *

><p><strong>And...break! I did change a few things around, time-wise. Cain and that mess has already happened. I thought it was a good chance to give Angel some guy allies in the Scoobies, though that really only applies to Oz. Wesley, of course, was a given, but Oz is just too cool to be left out! Angel, Oz, and Wesley...that's an odd bunch, isn't it? lol<strong>

**Oh, and a line from the AISHB sequel, Chapter 1!**

**"Get him Buffy!" - Cordy**

**P.S. I have yet to finish writing the next chapter. So, if it's not up on Friday, I warned you. **

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: Wow! I cannot believe I got this out! This chapter ended up being sooooo much longer than I thought! In fact, I didn't even intend to split this episode into two chapters, but alas, that's how it turned out. No matter, no matter, I guess...after all, you guys don't mind extra chapters, do you? :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: (stern glare) Okay, now, behave guys.**_

**Buffy: Why? She's totally on my turf.**

**Faith: (scoffs) I don't see your name on it.**

**Wesley: (nervously) Um, girls, can we not fight? **

**Buffy and Faith: No.**

**Angel: (seriously) I don't want to break up a fight.**

_**Me: (jerks thumb in Angel's direction) I'm with him.**_

**Giles: (frowns) But you've already written their fight...**

_**Me: (scandalized glare) Ssshhhh!**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 20<p>

Buffy sat glumly in the library. The 'oh wonderful and awesome Faith' had left with her friends, completely forgetting Buffy's existence. Though Willow had offered to help her study for her tests, Buffy had declined, not really feeling the already nonexistent urge to study. Angel could help her later, or Wes.

"Well, what do you think?" Wesley asked as he showed off yet another leather jacket. It had really only taken him about two weeks to lose the three-piece suits, and Buffy was thrilled. Suits were nice, but there were only so many pinstripes Buffy could take.

So, when Wesley had showed up one day in jeans and a leather jacket, Buffy had praised him, and continued to joke with Angel that it was the influence that had caused Wesley's fashion change. Angel continued to deny it, but Buffy was a firm believer in brotherly love and its influences.

"_You're like his older brother,"_ Buffy had explained to him. Angel had looked at her pointedly and Buffy had amended. _"Okay, you're like his older, older, way older brother that's completely awesome and cool."_

"Nice, Wes," Buffy approved. "What's this? Jacket number ten?"

"Lord, no!" Wesley shook his head. "What use would I have for ten leather jackets? This only makes three, which is hardly a disreputable number."

Buffy thought about it, before nodding in thoughtful agreement. "Yeah, I have two."

"You have one," Angel corrected. "The other one is mine."

"You gave it to me," Buffy retorted with a smile. "It's mine. No take backs."

"So…" Wesley said casually as he sat down at the table and flipped through an open book. "What do you, um, think of Faith?"

Buffy glared pointedly.

"Ah," Wesley nodded. "She's a little…"

"Crazy? Unhinged? Ticking time-bomb?" Buffy threw out. "Or how about cool and badass and adventurous?" she continued. "That seems to be what everyone else thinks."

"Buffy," Angel chided gently, but Buffy wasn't having any of it.

"Uh uh," she shook her head. "The whole 'youth and beauty' thing with Giles was creepy enough, but the way she looked at you," Buffy directed her attention at Angel, who raised his eyebrows. "Even though I completely understand," she continued. "But I didn't like the way she looked at you, either."

"What?" Angel asked innocently, even though he wore a smug smirk.

Yeah, he'd known that Faith had been checking him out. He'd had woman checking him out for two-hundred and forty-five years. He knew the look…but a jealous Buffy was cute—adorable, even.

"Oh, come on, Angel," Buffy said dubiously. "She was totally undressing you with her eyes!"

"This bothers you?" Angel couldn't help but egg her on.

"Yes!" Buffy fumed, crossing her arms over her chest. "You're mine," she declared firmly and Angel finally allowed himself to grin.

"Uh, can we not have this conversation?" Wesley asked. "I really don't want to talk about how desirable Angel is."

Angel's playful mood was shot down in flames with that sentence.

"See ya, Wes," Angel said as he rose, clapping the Watcher on the back soundly, causing the Watcher to wince slightly.

"Could you not do that?" Wesley muttered as Buffy too rose from the table to follow Angel. "I swear you do that on purpose."

Buffy smirked as she took Angel's hand, "See ya Wes."

With a gentle tug on her hand, Angel pulled Buffy away from the evolving Watcher and towards the exit. Giles appeared in the doorway, and the two of them made eye contact for a moment. Since coming back from London, Angel and Giles hadn't said much to each other. They'd seemingly come to a silent understanding. If Angel stepped out of line, he was dust. This line was determined by Giles, who had not been kind enough to share where exactly he'd drawn said line. So, Angel was just focused on not doing anything stupid.

Angel gave the Watcher a slight nod, and Giles returned it before stepping out of the doorway and allowing Buffy and Angel to pass. They walked quietly through the halls of the school before reaching the doors. The cool night air felt nice, and Buffy smiled slightly as she and Angel began to head in the direction of one of the many graveyards in Sunnydale.

"This really sucks," Buffy kicked an unfortunate rock in her path, sending it skidding further ahead along the sidewalk.

"What, Faith?"

"Who else?" Buffy retorted. "Faith did this, Faith did that," she said in a childish, whinny voice. "What's so great about her?"

"Why does she bother you so much?" Angel asked, tugging on her hand to bring them both to a stop.

"Because she's so—so," Buffy sighed exasperatedly. "She's messing everything up! Things were just getting back to normal, and now it's all about Faith…"

"Don't you think we've had the spotlight on us long enough?" Angel raised his eyebrows.

"I didn't mean it like that," Buffy shook her head frustrated, once again resuming their walk towards the graveyard. "I mean…I just…it's like they're forgetting about me."

"Faith isn't going to take your place," Angel said softly as he read into her statement. "You're irreplaceable."

"You're supposed to say that," Buffy replied, even though she did feel a little better. "But maybe I'm being a little immature," she admitted after a moment.

"Maybe," Angel agreed with a slight smile.

"Besides, I doubt half of what she said was true," Buffy said dubiously. "I mean really? Wrestling naked with an alligator?" she shook her head as they entered the graveyard.

Silently, yet completely in sync with each other, Buffy and Angel wove between the tombstones, each of them gripping a stake tightly. A loud snap caused the hunters to turn around and come face to face with two hungry vampires.

"Okay," Buffy smiled. "I've had a long day, and I'm a little cranky. Just a warning."

Apparently, the vampires weren't too keen on listening.

The vampire closest to Buffy launched himself at her and the Slayer neatly side-stepped the direct attack, spinning and then kicking her opponent in the back of the head. Angel had immediately been on the offensive, punching the remaining vampire in the face twice before having to duck a punch from the vamp.

The two vamps were easy enough to handle, and they were dust in relatively little time. Buffy ambled over to Angel and casually brushed off some dust from his coat. Recognizing the look in her eye, Angel felt a smile pull at his lips.

"You know, Faith was right about one thing," Buffy smiled as she placed both her hands on his chest. "Slaying _does_ make you hungry and horny."

Angel's smile morphed into a smirk. "I can help with that."

* * *

><p>If Buffy had thought that the first day of the Faith Invasion had been bad, the second day at school was even worse. It was Faith, Faith, and more Faith. Faith did this. Faith said that. Faith, Faith, Faith. Willow had even almost called her B.<p>

It didn't help that the next night at dinner, also with Faith, her mother had taken a shining to the dark headed Slayer too.

"I like this girl, Buffy," her mom had said when she'd gone to the kitchen to get Faith another soft drink.

"She's very…personable," Buffy had admitted as she'd climbed up on a stool. "She gets along with you, my friends…and look, now she's getting along with my fries," Buffy noted as she looked back at the table.

"Buffy…" Joyce chided.

"Plus she was making eyes at Angel," Buffy added pointedly, as if the fact alone was an excuse enough for her dislike. "This whole thing is creepy."

And not only had her mother defended Faith, but she'd even suggested that Buffy let Faith take over Slaying! So _not_ going to happen…

At least Wesley, Giles, and Angel were on her side; although, Buffy thought that Wes had simply sided with her because Faith scared him.

Faith didn't scare Buffy. No, the blonde Slayer was not scared of her dark haired counterpart. Perhaps threatened was a better word. Buffy didn't want Faith to come in and steal her thunder. She didn't want to lose anything, whether it be her friends or like last night, her fries. Maybe it was petty, maybe she was being too insecure, but it was how Buffy felt. Angel's reassurances helped, though it was at times like these when Buffy wondered how he put up with her and her seventeen year-old dramatics.

A sly smile pulled at Buffy's lips as she thought about how Angel had ended one of her little rants the night before. She'd stormed into his apartment after the dinner and patrol with Faith, complaining about how Faith called her "B" and how her mother had gone over to the "dark side."

Buffy had planned on saying more, but suddenly Angel's lips were on hers and she really didn't think about much else after that.

Yes, Angel definitely had his ways.

"What are you smiling about, B?" Faith asked as they turned down another street, which the dark-haired Slayer noted that they'd already patrolled earlier in the night. "Didn't we, um, do this street already?" she asked.

"Funny thing about vamps," Buffy began as her eyes scanned the alley for threats. "They'll hit a street even after you've been there," she continued to explain. "It's like they have no manners."

Faith noted how Buffy hadn't answered her first question, but decided to hash that out later. "Mhm," she agreed. "You've been doing this the longest."

"I have," Buffy was quick to point it out.

It hadn't taken Faith long to realize that Buffy was an easy target to pick on. She was quick to defend herself from any perceived threat, and it was fun to see what made her tick. In reality, Faith wanted a friend. Someone who understood, someone she could relate to—but she was finding that harder and harder the more she learned about Buffy Summers. Willow and Xander and the rest of the Scoobies wouldn't shut up about her. How cool she was. When she did this, how she did that, what bad guy she killed where…it was Buffy, Buffy, Buffy all the time.

And Angel…Faith had to smile a little at the mental image in her head of the tall, dark, badass-looking vamp. Angel was definitely the hottest thing on legs she'd seen, alive or dead. There was really only one turn-off though, and it was major—Angel looked at Buffy like _she_ was an angel, complete with a little golden halo.

It was Buffy, Buffy, Buffy, Buffy all the time. How was Faith supposed to compete with that? The goody-two-shoes, always-does-everything-right-Buffy…Faith wondered if she should bow down with the rest of the Scoobies and pledge her allegiance.

However, even with all of this, Faith still wanted a friend. She was haunted by memories, memories she didn't like to think about. They terrified her both during the day and at night. She was never rid of them. If, somehow, she mangaged not to think about _him _during the day, she would always dream about him at night—relive everything. Seeing her Watcher die over and over—the one true friend Faith had thought she'd ever had. Seeing _his_ face, sneering, uncaring, evil.

Faith just wanted someone to connect with, but it seemed like she and Buffy were on two completely different levels.

Shaking her head a little, determined to bring back her feisty persona, Faith remembered Buffy's quick agreement about how she'd been doing this the longest. Time to see what made Buff tick. "Yeah, maybe a little _too_ long."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Buffy snapped, exactly like Faith had hoped she would.

"Nothing," Faith shook her head, easily keeping the smile off her face. She was a great actor, the best.

But Buffy wasn't going to let it go. "You got a problem?"

Faith grinned and spread her arms wide, a gesture both placating and taunting at the same time. "I'm five-by-five, B, living entirely large," she said grandly. "I'm actually wondering about _your_ problem."

"Well, I may not sleep in the nude," Buffy began though she realized that she did—a lot. But Faith didn't need to know about her sex life. "…or rassle alligators…" she continued with barely a pause.

"Well maybe it's time you started," Faith interrupted. "Cause obviously something in your bottle needs uncorking."

Faith remembered what Xander had told her about how Angel had gone evil for a while, and how Buffy had to fight him—almost having to kill him. Faith thought that Xander had been about to tell more, but Willow had shown up and immediately redirected the conversation, giving Xander what Faith knew to be the 'shut up' look.

Maybe Angel was the problem. It had to suck that they had the all powerful love and couldn't, well, _act_ on it.

"Is it the Angel thing?" Faith asked.

Buffy's eyes narrowed. "What do you know about Angel?"

"Just what your friends tell me," Faith shrugged as if it were no consequence. "Big love, almost had to kill him—must suck having him around all the time, and you can't, you know," Faith made a crude gesture with her hands. "Work it out."

Buffy stared at Faith uncomprehendingly for a few moments. Had she really just suggested that Buffy was so uptight because of sexual frustration? Buffy thought about adamantly denying it, but that would prompt an impromptu interrogation into her sex life that Buffy really didn't want to share with Faith. It also struck Buffy odd that Faith didn't know that Angel's soul was anchored…and for some hidden reason, Buffy didn't bother to correct her.

"I've got an idea," Buffy said dangerously as she stepped closer to Faith. "How about from now on we don't talk about Angel or anything else in my life," she offered. "Because it's _my_ life."

"What are you getting so strung out for, B?" Faith asked, her blood already beginning to sing as it recognized the potential for a fight.

Okay, if Faith called her "B" one more time, Buffy was going to scream. "Why are your lips still moving, F?"

"Did I just hear a threat?"

"Would you like to?"

Faith grinned. "Wow. You think you can take me?"

"Yeah," Buffy replied confidently, thinking of multiple ways she could beat the crap out of Faith. However, all those thoughts flew out the window when she looked over her sister Slayer's shoulder and saw the vamps headed their way. "I just hope they can't," Buffy finished before shoving Faith aside as the first vampire attacked.

Buffy punched the vamp in the gut, sending him flying back. Out of nowhere, another vamp charged at her and swung a vicious fist towards her face. Barely ducking in time, Buffy managed to avoid the hit. She and the vampire traded blows for a moment, neither of them able to make any headway. Then, Buffy faked left and threw a wicked right hook that nailed the vamp in the face, sending him sprawling.

Seeing a slight break in the fight, Buffy looked up to see how Faith was faring. That turned out to be the wrong thing to do as it resulted in a fist connecting to her cheek. Buffy stumbled with the force of the blow, and then tripped over the vamp's outstretched leg, falling to the ground and landing awkwardly on her shoulder.

Wincing at the bruise she knew was forming, Buffy looked up to see that Faith had slammed a trashcan over the vamp's head and had thrown him into some plywood. Buffy was jerked back to attention at the sound of a hungry growl. Looking up towards the sound, Buffy was only just able to roll out of the way of the oncoming attack by the vamp she'd knocked down first.

Rolling to her feet, Buffy picked up the stake from the ground and promptly dusted the vamp, barely registering the demon exploding into dust. Again, Buffy was about to turn and see how Faith was doing, but a rough hand grabbed her shoulder and spun her around, throwing her into a wall. Fighting back the pain, Buffy got her feet quickly and just in time to kick the vampire that had leapt towards her.

"My dead mother hits harder than that!"

Buffy heard Faith's words, but didn't have time to turn her head as another vamp appeared out of the woodwork. Buffy ran at him, gaining momentum, before launched a punch that hit the vamp square in the jaw, dropping him to the ground. The vamp struggled to his feet, but Buffy promptly flipped him over her shoulder.

Buffy looked up at Faith as she saw another vamp out of the corner of her eye. "Faith! Stake him already and give me a hand!" she demanded as she realized Faith was still beating on the first vampire they'd seen.

A growl alerted Buffy to the danger to her right, but Buffy didn't have time to defend herself. Her next thought was that she was flying through the air. Buffy landed on the cold pavement hard and groaned, especially when she felt the heavy weight of one of the vamp's pin her to the ground. Appparently, her original attacker and a newbie had joined forces against her.

The aching in her shoulder was steadily growing worse, and Buffy fought to ignore the fire that seemed to burn her shoulder. Buffy glanced around her, looking for anything she could use as a weapon. She saw a two by four a few feet from her and began to reach towards it.

"For Kakistos we live! For Kakistos you die!" the vampire proclaimed as Buffy continued to claw for the two by four.

"Faith!" Buffy screamed as the vampire continued to advance on her.

The vampire that was on top of her began to lean in, as if to bite her, and pure panic lit Buffy's veins. Forgetting the two-by-four completely, Buffy began to struggle against the vampire that was on top of her. She was not getting bitten by a vampire. Something inside her told her that it was wrong on so many levels. The obvious was that it was disgusting and a sure way to die. Another reason, a more subtle reason, was that Buffy knew it was wrong for _this_ vampire to bite her. She was Angel's. She could only be bitten by Angel.

Buffy began to struggle anew, but the vamp's teeth kept getting closer and closer to her neck. Then, suddenly, the vamp was gone.

Angel growled furiously at the vampire, and made quick work of him, dusting him in seconds. Meanwhile, Buffy had picked up the two-by-four and whacked the other vamp over the head. Angel quickly staked that vamp too.

Under any other circumstances, Angel and Buffy would have immediately gone to each other. However, the moment was ruined by the sound of Faith still beating on the same vampire, having yet to stake him.

Before Angel could haul Faith off the vamp, Buffy was there and yanked Faith back. She staked the vamp, and then turned on her heel, punching Faith in the face. "What the hell was that?" Buffy demanded angrily.

Faith dabbed at the blood on her lip. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about you leaving me out to dry!" Buffy growled. "Our job is to slay demons, not beat them to a bloody pulp while their friends corner me!"

Faith debated hitting Buffy back, but she glanced at Angel and thought better of it. At the moment, she didn't think it would take much to have Mr. Badass decide to snap her neck, and however hot Angel was, Faith wanted to live. So, Faith just shrugged, "Gee, B. Thought you could handle yourself," she said casually before walking off, not looking back.

Buffy watched Faith leave, and the moment the dark-haired Slayer was out of sight, Buffy sagged against the alley wall. Angel was right by her side in an instant, and Buffy leaned into him as he wrapped his arms around her waist and held her close.

"She has major problems, Angel," Buffy sighed quietly.

"Yeah," Angel agreed. "And if she's not careful, someone's going to get killed."

* * *

><p>The next day at school, Buffy immediately went to the library, intent on venting to at least one of her Watchers. Well, in her heart, Giles would always be her Watcher. Wesley was more like her really, really, really nerdy friend who liked to act like a Watcher. The thought lightened Buffy's mood considerably, and when she entered the library she found that a small smile had graced her lips.<p>

However, that smile became an all out grin when she saw her favorite person in the world sitting at the table with Wes, talking quietly over a very old book they were both studying. Neither looked up as she approached, but that was okay with Buffy. This way she got to listen to the soft lilt of Angel's old Irish brogue as he read from the book...in Gaelic. Apparently, they had a system. Angel would read it as it was in Gaelic, before giving Wesley the English version, who would then scribble it on a legal pad.

When Buffy reached them, she slid her hands over Angel's shoulders and wrapped her arms loosely around neck, examining the old writing in the book. "That's the sexiest thing ever," Buffy whispered in his ear so low that Wesley couldn't hear.

Angel glanced up at her and smirked, "_T__ú__déarfainn i dtús báire __álainn__domhan a sheachaint__, __Muirnín__. __Tá mé chomh doirte sin duit."_

Buffy smiled softly, "Aw, that's sweet."

Wesley frowned. "You have no idea what he said, Buffy," he pointed out. "How can you know?"

Buffy looked at Wesley like he was missing the obvious, which, he was. "Wes, something that sounded that pretty couldn't _not_ be sweet."

"Oh," Wesley said lamely, seeing Angel's smug smirk. _Maybe I should practice an Irish accent?_ Wesley thought to himself. _Perhaps Angel could give me dating advice…_

"Buffy?" Giles appeared behind them, looking at her questioningly.

"Did you find out about Faith's Watcher?" Buffy asked both Giles and Wesley, remembering their conversation earlier in the hallway.

"Ah, yes," Wesley said as he took off his glasses as Giles took the legal pad, immediately examining the translations. "As it turns out, Faith was not truthful."

"She lied," Giles picked up where Wesley left off. "Her Watcher is dead."

Buffy frowned at this news. "What about the kissing toast guy?" she asked.

"Kakistos," Angel, Giles, and Wesley corrected at the same time, though Angel was the only one who didn't look slightly annoyed. He was actually fighting a smile. He knew Buffy messed up the names on purpose.

"Whatever," Buffy managed to keep the smile off her face. "They have to be connected. Faith shows up? Kakistos shows up right after? Yeah, I don't think so. I don't believe in coincidences, or leprechauns," Buffy added as an afterthought.

"True," Giles agreed.

"About the coincidences or the leprechauns?" Buffy needed clarification.

"Oh, the fact that coincidences do not exist," Giles replied as he sat down at the table beside Wesley and across from Angel.

"What about the leprechauns?" Buffy asked immediately. "I was right about that too…right?"

Giles thought for a moment, "As far as I know."

Buffy looked to Wesley, wanting a second opinion. Wesley looked up, slightly wide-eyed. "Oh, no, leprechauns are completely fictitious…as far as I know."

Simultaneously, all of them turned to Angel.

Angel looked uncomfortable. "Uh…so what are we going to do about Faith?" he changed the subject.

Buffy sighed. "I'll have to talk to her." The bell rang then, signaling everyone that school was out. Buffy gave them all a little wave before turning to leave. "I'll see you guys later."

As she walked out the door, she ran into Scott. "Hi, Buffy," he smiled shyly.

"Oh, hey," Buffy smiled politely; glad that Angel wasn't behind her…he really loved scaring Scott a little too much.

"Um," Scott hesitated, seeming to look behind her to see if Angel was there. "Is that guy you're always with your boyfriend?" he asked quickly.

Buffy giggled, but tried not to make it sound patronizing. "Yeah," she informed him with a kind smile.

"Oh," Scott nodded. "Yeah, I, uh, thought that he was, because you know…he, um, kinda looked like he wanted to kill me, ya know?"

"He's…" Buffy tried to be diplomatic. "Protective," she decided.

Suddenly, Scott's eyes grew wide as he stared over her shoulder. "Bye, Buffy," he said quickly before scampering away.

"Can you stop doing that?" Buffy asked, not turning around to look at Angel. "He's scared of you."

"That's the idea," Angel answered as they began to walk down the hall to the nearest sewer entrance.

"You avoided the leprechaun question," Buffy pointed out, causing Angel to sigh as he dropped down into sewer.

"Yeah," he agreed as he reached out for her.

Buffy jumped into his arms, the result causing their faces to be within inches of each other. "Are leprechauns real?" she asked.

"You know, technically, they're just Irishman," Angel replied, deftly avoiding the question.

"You're Irish," Buffy replied with a smile. "Does that mean you're a leprechaun?"

Angel grinned. "Nah."

"No?" Buffy asked before finally closing the distance between them and kissing his lips. "That's too bad," she smiled when she pulled away.

"You need to get to Faith," Angel said as he set her on her feet.

Buffy frowned. "You're not coming with me?"

"This is between you and Faith," Angel replied. "It's a Slayer thing. She needs you."

"Where will you go then?" Buffy asked as they walked.

"Try and track down Kakistos."

* * *

><p>"So what brings you to the poor side of town?" Faith asked casually as she began to fold some clothes.<p>

"Cloven guy," Buffy said casually, though her eyes were serious, her hands on her hips. "Goes by the name of Kakistos?"

"What do you know about Kakistos?" Faith asked lowly, but with a lilt of panic in her voice that Buffy didn't miss.

"He's here," Buffy told her dark-haired counterpart, reading the true fear in Faith's eyes. Buffy wondered if Faith's badass attitude was just a smokescreen to hide her past and her fear.

"What he do to you?" Buffy asked, knowing that this was personal.

Faith began throwing clothes into her bag. "It's what I did to him, alright?" she answered quickly as she continued to pack.

"And what was that?" Buffy asked as Faith tossed her bag on the bed. "Faith, you came here for a reason. I can help," she offered earnestly.

"You can mind your own business," Faith snapped, causing Buffy to raise her eyebrows. Faith might not be _quite_ _as_ tough as she was trying to seem, but she was still stubborn…and scared. "_I'm_ the one that can handle this."

"Yeah, you're a real badass at packing," Buffy retorted. "Is this something you're just going to dump on me?"

"You don't know me," Faith replied quickly. "You don't know what I've done, what I've been through," she continued on defensively as she headed towards the door. "I'll take care of this, alright?"

"Like you took care of your Watcher?" Buffy threw out casually, seeing Faith's back stiffen at her words. Her hand paused on the doorknob, and slowly she turned back around to face Buffy, her face sad.

"He killed her, didn't he?" Buffy guessed sympathetically.

"They don't have a word for what he did to her," Faith growled angrily.

There was a beat of silence that was interrupted by a knock on the door. "Oh, what now?" Faith groaned as she looked through the peephole, seeing her manager. Unthinkingly, she threw open the door.

Big mistake.

Kakistos' hand shot out and grabbed Faith by the neck. "No!" Faith choked out, trying to squirm out of her captor's grip.

And that's when Angel showed up. He punched Kakistos in the temple, causing the old vampire to roar in outrage, though he let go of Faith. "Buffy, shut the door!" Angel ordered as he and Kakistos squared off.

Buffy thought about arguing, but knew that Angel was buying herself and Faith time to escape out the back. Hating herself and what she was about to do, she slammed the door and grabbed Faith's hand, practically dragging her into the bathroom.

"Come on!" Buffy urged as she towed an almost hysterical Faith behind her.

"No! No!" Faith panicked.

"Scream later, escape now!" Buffy ordered before she and Faith climbed through the window.

As she and Faith dropped to the ground, Buffy froze as she heard a distinct growl of fury that she knew was Angel. That wasn't what had made her stop though. It was the fact that she could hear the masked pain in the sound. Hesitating only a second more and trusting that Angel could take care of himself, Buffy grabbed Faith's hand and ran.

They ran without looking back until they reached a fork. Buffy took the left fork, dragging Faith along after, though the Slayer seemed to have gathered her wits and was now keeping up with Buffy fine. Seeing an old warehouse, Buffy broke through the glass and she and Faith took the time to catch their breath.

"We're okay," Buffy assured them, though her mind wondered if the same could be said for Angel. "What happened?" she asked as she turned to face Faith, who was still wide-eyed and panicky.

"Faith, what happened?" Buffy repeated again. Apparently, Faith had not gathered enough wits to think straight, just run.

"I—I was there when he…when he killed her," Faith explained with a shaky breath. "H-he was going to do the same to me, but I—I got away and I ran."

"Faith, first rule of slaying: don't die," Buffy enlightened. "You did the right thing," she assured the dark-haired girl. "You didn't die. Now, do the math—one of him and two of us."

Faith looked past Buffy, shaking her head. "No."

"Yes."

"No," Faith shook her head vehemently, her eyes wide as she stared at something over Buffy's shoulder. "No!"

Buffy turned and went pale at the sight of the dead people on the floor. "This is his place," Faith realized.

"He drove us here," Buffy finished the thought, her mind drifting to Angel once more. Was he alright?

A vampire appeared at the entrance, the real entrance, not the one Buffy had created by barreling through the window. He growled menacingly, and Buffy turned around and ran towards the end of the building, dragging Faith along behind her once more. Buffy heard two other vampires join the third and give chase. Knowing that it was time to fight them, Buffy looked around for anything she could use against them. Spotting a bucket on the floor, Buffy stuck her foot in it and spun, hurling it at the vamps. It hit one of them in the face, causing him to drop to the floor.

Buffy didn't give the other vamps a chance to defend themselves. Quickly, she delivered a roundhouse kick to one vampire's temple, and then punched the remaining vamp in the face twice in quick succession, sending him flying back over a table. Buffy jumped on the table and then rolled so that she kicked the vampire in the back as he tried to get to his feet.

Another vampire appeared and Buffy picked up a crowbar, swinging it like a baseball bat and hitting the vamp in the neck, sending her attacker to the ground in a heap. Buffy looked over to see that Kakistos had showed up and was advancing on Faith—though Buffy was proud to see that he was sporting three nasty gashes on his shoulder, and Buffy could tell that he had a broken nose.

Angel.

"Faith!" Buffy called to her sister Slayer. "Don't die!" she reminded her as she threw the crowbar.

Faith caught it, but before she could swing it, Kakistos punched her hard in the face, which sent Faith hurtling back into a wall of wooden beams, causing them to topple and fall around her.

Buffy moved to help, but a vamp appeared behind her, and she was forced to deal with it. Gritting her teeth, Buffy spun and kicked the vamp in the chest before sending a quick punch in his way. However, he managed to block and they continued to dance around each other. Buffy growled in frustration as she fought the vamp, hearing Faith screaming in the background. She had to help her.

And then the vamp was gone, dust.

Angel gave her a quick grin, looking slightly worse for wear, but he was still standing. "Go," he ordered. "I'll take care of the rest," he said, motioning to Trick and another vamp that were trying to sneak out.

Buffy didn't need any more encouragement.

Buffy ran up behind Kakistos and kicked him in the back of the knee, causing his leg to buckle slightly. Buffy spun him around to face her and went to backhand him, but Kakistos blocked it. Not hindered in the slightest, Buffy spun and backhanded him with her left hand instead.

Buffy drove her stake into his chest, but it didn't reach his heart, unable to penetrate his thick skin. Growling, Kakistos grabbed Buffy by her hair and threw her away from him, but Buffy wasn't going down that easy. She pulled herself to her feet and punched Kakistos in the face. Again, she staked him…and again, she couldn't puncture his heart.

Kakistos grinned and grabbed her by the head, throwing her down. "I guess you need a bigger stake, Slayer!" he mocked.

And then there was a giant beam protruding from his chest. He stared at it for a moment, shocked, before exploding into dust. When the dust settled, Buffy saw Faith breathing hard and looking harried, but she was still standing victorious.

Angel appeared then, sporting a nasty cut above his eye. Seeing Buffy's look, Angel waved off her concern. "I'm fine." He glanced at Faith and then Buffy. "I'll head home."

"You don't have to—," Buffy began, but Angel gave her a knowing, wise smile.

"Yeah, I do. You two go celebrate," he said before turning and disappearing into the darkness.

Buffy watched him go before turning to Faith. "Hungry?"

Faith grinned. "Starved."

* * *

><p>Hours later, after eating more than their friends could possibly believe, Buffy and Faith had parted ways. Faith was headed back to her motel room, and Buffy said goodbye to Wesley and Giles and the Scoobies before leaving as well.<p>

But Buffy didn't go to her house.

Instead, she went to Angel's apartment.

Buffy didn't knock. They'd gone way past that stage. In fact, Buffy practically lived in the apartment as more and more of her clothes seemed to make their way into his dresser. Buffy opened and closed the door soundlessly, her eyes scanning the dark room. She could see Angel's form in the bed and Buffy quickly shed her clothes and pulled on one of Angel's shirts.

Buffy climbed into bed beside him, knowing that he was awake though he didn't move. Buffy scooted closer to him and rested her chin on his shoulder. "Hi."

"Hi," Angel replied, and Buffy could hear the smile in his voice.

"You didn't have to leave you know," Buffy told him. "I know you were being all wise and stuff…but I missed you."

Angel looked back at her. "You and Faith needed some time to yourselves."

"It still wasn't right without you there," Buffy shook her head. "It doesn't seem like anything's right if you're not with me."

Suddenly, Angel rolled so that he was hovering over Buffy. "Really? I was wondering if it was just me."

Buffy reached up and brought his head down to hers, kissing him softly for a moment. "What did you say to me earlier?" she asked as she remembered the scene in the library. "What did it mean?"

Angel smiled, before quoting, "You are the most beautiful woman in the world, sweetheart. I love you so much."

Buffy had a silly grin on her face before reaching up to kiss him once more. It was a slow, languid kiss, full of love, and when Buffy finally had to come up for air, she was still grinning. "I knew it'd been something sweet."

* * *

><p><strong>Well, there we go! Changed just a few things. When I originally saw the episode, I really wanted to punch Faith...hence Buffy punching Faith. :D<strong>

**And Faith doesn't know Angel's soul is anchored! Question is...will she find out eventually? Funny thing is, I haven't**** decided yet! lol**

**Next episode is...Amends...oh, boy...**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Hello! Wow, this is a super-long episode rewrite! Or maybe it just seems that way. I rewrote the entire episode in one sitting, which, is like hours. And, phew, boy was it a toughy! Lots and lots of Angel broodiness/craziness to deal with! That and I had to twist it to make sense for this timeline. BUT I stayed up until...let's see...what time is it?...3:17 a.m. to write this entire episode and post? **

**Oh, and before I forget. Even though Oz is not in this chapter (frown), I just want to clarify. In this timeline, Willow and Xander didn't get all "Oh, I like you so much and can't stop thinking about kissing you senseless." Willow is still with Oz, and they are going strong. However, Xander and Cordy are over. Let's just say they filed irreconcilable differences and called it quits, eh? :D Besides, I like Xander with Anya sooooooo much better.**

**Okay, on with the chapter!**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Angel: (pouts) I don't like this episode.**

_**Me: (sympathetic frown) Sorry, but you've just got to suffer.**_

**Buffy: (glares) Hey, don't you think he suffers enough?**

_**Me: Believe me, I love him just as much as you do...**_

**Buffy: Do not!**

_**Me: Do too!**_

**Buffy: Do not!**

_**Me: Do too!**_

**Angel: Hey! Cool it, will ya? (grins) There's enough of me to go around!**

**_Me: (fans herself and begins to sing)_ _A dream is a wish your heart makes..._**

**Buffy: Seriously, Cinderella?**

_**Me: What? I love the little mice. They're cute. Don't judge me.**_

* * *

><p>Amends<p>

It was not uncommon for Angel to dream.

It was not uncommon for these dreams to be nightmares.

What _was_ uncommon was the sheer _vividness_ of the dream.

Sight. Smell. It was tangible. It was like forgetting to take a trip down memory lane and instead buying a house and settling in for the indefinite future. It was so real.

Angel was not one to forget the past. Guilt seemed to be his constant companion, and Angel, being the humble, self-deprecating man he was, didn't question it. The past few months, no—the past _year_ had been one hell of a guilt trip. In one year, he'd managed to lose his soul, wreak havoc as Angelus once again, torture his lover and her friends, and even amongst all the things he'd had on his metaphorical plate—he'd still managed to find time to try and awaken Acathla. All in all, it was quite a failed accomplishment in the end.

Willow had managed to re-ensoul him, permanently. His soul wasn't going anywhere, but at the time, that fact hadn't brought him any peace. Angel was still wracked with the guilt of what he'd done. It wasn't the memories necessarily that were so bad. It was the emotions that came with them. The feeling of pleasure he got from snapping someone's neck. The feeling of happiness he got from ending someone's life. It was a thrill, and it was the best, most addictive drug. That feeling of power, of superiority—nothing could touch him. He felt no guilt. No remorse. But that had been Angelus, not him…

Hadn't it?

Was it him? Buffy kept telling him that he and Angelus were two separate beings, yet she did not deny that they were linked. What did that mean? Did that mean that he was a killer? Angel didn't hesitate to answer his own question. Yes, he was a killer. By nature, he was a killer. He was a vampire, not a man.

Angel sighed and rolled over onto his back, careful not to jostle Buffy who was lying so peacefully beside him. Unthinkingly, he reached out and gently brushed back the hair from her face, his lips twitching in a smile as Buffy unconsciously leaned into his feather-light touch.

How could she feel so safe with him?

Regretfully, Angel pulled his hand away and returned to his brooding. Buffy probably thought that he'd left behind the guilt of what he'd done the past year as Angelus, and in all actuality, he'd come close. Having Buffy there, comforting him, knowing exactly what to say when helped. Having the ability to take comfort in her, completely losing himself in her, to love and to be loved in return helped too.

But this dream, this nightmare—it wasn't about what had happened most recently as Angelus. No, this was long, long, long ago…

If Angel remembered correctly it'd been 1838—Dublin. Snow was falling, adding another layer of white to the already white ground. People had been bustling about, fleeing into the warmth and comfort that burning fireplaces provided or finishing up some last minute shopping. He'd been waiting in an alley, waiting patiently for Daniel to pass.

When the man had been within arm's reach, he'd reached out and grabbed him by the coat, pulling him into the alley and away from prying eyes. Although that really didn't matter. If anyone saw he'd just kill them too.

The dream had been crystal clear. He'd relived the entire moment…

_Daniel? Where are you going? _It had been a polite enough question.

Daniel had been filled with fear, eyes wide as he took in Angelus' vampire visage. _You! You're not human! _

Angel could remember how Daniel had trembled.

_Not of late, no. _Such a patronizing reply.

Daniel had stuttered, frozen. _Wh-what do you want? _

Angelus had smiled, as if talking to a child. _Well, it happens that I'm hungry, Daniel, and seeing as that you're somewhat in me debt…_

_Please, I can't! _

_A man playing at cards should have a natural intelligence or a great deal of money. Sadly, you're lacking in both…_

Daniel had tried to run, but it'd had been all too easy to reach out and grab him by his coat.

_So I take me winnings my own way._

Knowing he was about to die, pleading for a savior, or perhaps both, Daniel had begun to pray.

_Daniel! Be of good cheer! It's Christmas!_

And then Angel had killed him.

* * *

><p>"Merry Christmas!"<p>

Buffy smiled at the Santa who was outside the store ringing the bell for the Salvation Army. Christmas time was her favorite time of year. It was always so happy and bright and cheerful and all around fun. This Christmas was special for another reason though. This would be her first Christmas with Angel, who, adorably, was out of practice.

"Who are all these for?" Angel asked, though the sound was muffled by the mountain of boxes and bags he carried in his arms.

"The Scoobies, Mom, Giles, Wesley," Buffy listed the recipients off her mental list. "Oh, and I already mailed one to my Aunt. If I timed it right, she should get it on Christmas."

One of the bags began to slip and Buffy decided that Angel was not to be used as a pack mule. "Here," she giggled as she took the slipping bag and a few others.

"Which one is mine?" Angel asked as they continued walking, a childish light dancing in his eye—all thoughts of his earlier dream forgotten.

Buffy smirked. "Please, your gift was the first one I bought!"

"The herb thing?" Angel frowned. "I thought that was for Willow."

Buffy laughed. "No, I bought your gift, like, last week."

"Oh," Angel frowned. "Where did you hide it?"

"Like I'm telling you!" Buffy shook her head. "That defeats the whole purpose!"

"How about a hint?" Angel continued as they walked down the sidewalk. "Is is bigger than a loaf of bread?"

Buffy laughed, but didn't answer.

"Can it fit in an envelope?" Angel tried again.

"I'm not telling!" Buffy managed between giggles. "You'll just have to wait."

"Buffy, I'm two hundred and forty-five," Angel pointed out. "I've been waiting awhile."

"Then you should have tons of patience," Buffy retorted easily. "Which, usually, you do."

"It's all your fault."

"Is not."

"Is too."

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"I'm too old to play this game," Angel sighed though he couldn't fight his smile.

The couple continued on in this fashion as they finished shopping, or rather, as _Buffy_ finished shopping. Angel followed her dutifully, holding more boxes, offering advice when asked, and sometimes not—like when Buffy had tried to buy herself a shirt that said 'BITE ME'.

"_It's really not that funny,"_ he shook his head at Buffy's maniacal giggles.

"_Yes, it is!"_

When Buffy finally declared that she'd done all she could do (which was rack up what Angel knew was a very expensive credit card bill that he _knew_ would get her grounded…_after_ Christmas), she decided that they would go to her house, stow the gifts in her closet, and then escape to his apartment where they would rip each other's clothes off and make very passionate love.

Those were her exact words. Needless to say, Angel wanted to get to the apartment as quickly as possible.

They were about to cross the street when Angel froze. It wasn't possible…

Daniel stood on the other side of the street, wearing a terribly sad expression. All Angel could do was stare. This wasn't real. It couldn't be real. Daniel was dead. Angel had killed him. He couldn't be _here_.

"Angel?" Buffy asked, having walked a few steps out into the road before noticing that he wasn't right behind her.

Angel continued to stare at Daniel, unable to look away or fight the sudden, overwhelming guilt that flooded through him.

"Angel?" Buffy asked, noticing his gaze and looking in the general direction. She didn't see anything. "Angel?" she asked again, worried.

Her tone cut through his daze, and Angel offered her a weak smile. "I'm here," he said as he immediately moved to her side, unthinkingly grabbing her hand and twining their fingers together. "I'm here," he repeated mostly to himself, though he added in his head. _And Daniel's not._

Buffy frowned and squeezed his hand comfortingly. She was surprised by how tightly he squeezed back, almost as if she was his lifeline. Though Buffy didn't mind, she did wonder what had upset him so. Buffy might not have the centuries of experience of reading people like Angel, but she _knew_ Angel. Something was bothering him, and just now, she'd seen genuine fear in his eyes as he'd gazed at nothing across the street.

* * *

><p>"He was just looking at nothing," Buffy explained to Willow as they stopped at their lockers the next day at school. "It was weird."<p>

"Angel? Weird? What are the odds?" Xander said sarcastically, earning a glare from both Buffy and Willow.

"Do you think something's wrong?" Willow asked as she put some stuff in her locker. "Maybe you could ask Giles?"

"No, I don't want to bug Giles," Buffy hesitated. "He's still kinda twitchy when it comes to Angel."

"What about Wesley?" Willow offered. "He'll help."

Buffy brightened at this idea. "Yeah, yeah he will—if it comes to that," she added with a frown.

Seeing Willow's questioning look, Buffy explained. "Well, I know that Angel has nightmares sometimes," Buffy explained with a frown. "And afterwards he never goes back to sleep, he'll just get up and work out the rest of the night."

"Does he know you know that?" Willow questioned as they began to walk to their next class.

Buffy shook her head. "I always pretend I'm still asleep. He had a nightmare the night before last, and even though he had the whole 'staring at nothing' episode later…" Buffy frowned as she remembered the fear in his eyes. "I just don't want to panic and tell Wesley if it's only gonna a onetime deal. I mean, Angel has nightmares—more than I like—but maybe this last one just cut a little deeper."

Willow frowned as she thought of everything that Angel had to deal with. "Yeah, I guess it'd be smart to wait and see."

"Okay, so how about that English test next period?" Xander not so subtly changed the subject. "Is it to be or not to be?"

"You do know the test is over _Macbeth_, not _Hamlet_, right?" Willow raised her eyebrows.

"Really?" Xander asked. "I thought it _Romeo and What's-Her-Face_…" he joked with a grin.

"Juliet!" Willow and Buffy laughed.

"Is it really over _Macbeth?"_ Xander asked as they took their seats.

"Yep," Willow and Buffy chorused.

Xander's head hit the desk with a thud.

* * *

><p>Buffy meandered through the many rows of Christmas trees, searching for the perfect one. School had been slower than normal, ridiculously so. She'd spent the entire day worried about Angel, and wanted to go to him as soon as possible, but her mother had insisted on getting the tree today.<p>

Buffy let her mind wonder as she followed her mother through the trees. Something was bothering Angel. It was obvious, and the thing about Angel was that nothing about him was obvious. He was subtle, reserved, mysterious, and _not_ obvious—at least to the casual observer. Buffy knew better though.

He'd had a nightmare that much Buffy knew for sure. Should she ask him about it? Buffy was hesitant in carrying out this thought. Did she want him to dredge up the memory? Should she let him work through it on his own? Would he even tell her if she asked? One thing that made Angel, _Angel_ was his annoying, yet noble, habit of carrying his own guilt. He didn't want to burden anyone else with his troubles.

How could she help though? A kind word? A gentle touch? What could she do? Buffy frowned.

"Do you not like this one?" her mother asked, misinterpreting the reason for her daughter's expression.

Buffy blinked rapidly. "Uh, no not really," she shrugged. "Too poufy."

Joyce looked back at the tree. "You're right," she said and once again she was on the hunt.

"Oh, you know honey," Joyce began as she scanned for the perfect tree. "I was thinking we should invite Faith to spend Christmas Eve with us."

"I don't know," Buffy hedged. "Faith and I don't really hang out much or make eye contact lately."

Buffy had thought that eventually, after getting to know each other, she and Faith would mesh—as it turned out, she was wrong. She would always be Buffy and Faith would always be Faith. There was no give and take. Buffy had her rules and Faith had her rules—which seemed to be one rule, and that was that there were no rules. At the moment, the only thing they had in common was being a Slayer and fighting all the bad. To Buffy, that was really the one thing that mattered above all else. Whether she and Faith got along or not wasn't the big picture. The big picture was slaying demons and making the nighttime just a little safer for everyone else.

"Do you really want to let her spend Christmas Eve all by herself in that dingy, little motel room?" Joyce asked as she examined another potential tree.

"You're still number one on the guilt trip, Mom," Buffy smiled dryly.

"I try."

Buffy gave in. "I'll ask her."

"You're a doll."

"What about Giles?" Buffy asked. "He doesn't have any family."

"But would he really want to spend Christmas around all us girls?" Joyce's eyebrows furrowed.

Buffy shrugged. "Can't hurt to ask."

"Okay," Joyce sighed as she came to a stop, her hands on her hips. "Let's divide and conquer," she suggested. "You zig, and I'll zag."

"And break!" Buffy joked, going to the right down a little path.

She came to a stop when she saw a whole group of dead trees. Frowning, she looked at the surrounding green trees and then back at the dead ones. "Bunch of them up and died on us," a tree seller came up behind her. "Don't know why. If you want one, I can make you a hell of a deal."

Buffy shook her head, her frown still in place. "No, thanks." That was odd…

"Oh, honey! I found it!" her mother called from across the lot, and Buffy gave the dead trees one last look before turning to see which tree her mother had deemed worthy.

* * *

><p>Angel jerked awake, panting unnecessarily as he adjusted to his surroundings, his <em>real<em> surroundings. It was real. _This_ was real. His apartment. His books. His artifacts. Buffy's scent. Buffy's heartbeat. Buffy's life. This was what was real.

Not the nightmare.

Not the people.

Angel threw back the covers and got out of bed, quickly dressing and then going out the door with only one destination in mind. He walked briskly, not paying any attention to the people he passed. They didn't matter. The only thing that mattered right now was answers. He needed answers. He needed to know why.

Knowing that his person of interest wouldn't have yet left the school library, Angel walked through the doors quickly, hurrying down the hall. The doors to the library swung open dramatically as he entered, causing Wesley to look up from his book.

"Ah, hello, Angel," Wesley greeted as he closed his book. "How are you?"

"I need to know why," Angel didn't bother leading up to the topic of conversation.

Wesley frowned, unable to follow. "Why, what?"

"I need to know why," Angel repeated frustrated. "I need your help."

"Alright," Wesley still wore a frown. He'd never seen Angel so seemingly unhinged. "What can I do for you?"

"I need to know why," Angel growled as he began to pace. "I-I been having these…nightmares lately—about the past. It's—it's like I'm living it all again. It's so, so vivid...I need to know—I need to know why."

Wesley thought for a moment. "And these nightmares just started?"

Angel nodded, his eyes begging for an answer. "Come on, Wes, dig around in that brain of yours. Tell me something, anything."

"It's believed that Vincent Van Gogh might have been a Yanuk demon—very artsy types, but a little off-kilter," Wesley offered.

"That was helpful," Angel deadpanned.

"I'll look up some things," Wesley cajoled.

"I don't need you to look up some things, I need you to give me answers," Angel snapped, causing Wesley to sweat at the dangerous, wild look in his friend's eye.

"Why does this have you so worried?" Wesley asked nervously. "Aside from the obvious?"

Angel swallowed unnecessarily. "Because I'm pretty sure it's only going to get worse."

The doors opened then, and both Angel and Wesley looked to see the new visitor. Giles came in and stopped short for a moment, seeing Angel. It was then that Giles noticed that the vampire looked like he'd seen a ghost.

Angel couldn't believe his eyes. Jenny was here. She was right beside Giles. She too, looked sad. She ran a loving hand down Giles' arm, but the ex-Watcher didn't react.

_Because she isn't there. _Angel reminded himself.

"What?" Giles finally asked, growing uncomfortable.

"Don't you see her?" Angel couldn't help but ask.

"Who?" Giles looked around, his brows furrowed in confusion.

Angel shook his head. He was going crazy. He was seeing things. That was the first sign…or was it hearing voices? Either way, something was wrong. He was wrong. The world was wrong. Buffy was wrong. Everyone was wrong. Nothing was right. Nothing would ever be right. Nothing made sense. Nothing would ever make sense. Jenny was here. Jenny was dead. Daniel was here. Daniel was dead…

"I can't," Angel mumbled, quickly fleeing towards the exit, completely avoiding Giles and the fake/real Jenny.

Giles looked from Angel's fleeing form to Wesley, confusion splayed all over his features. "What the bloody hell was that about?"

* * *

><p>Buffy walked into Angel's apartment quietly setting her things down. She'd just gotten back from Faith's motel room. As she'd expected, Faith had turned down her invitation to Christmas Eve dinner and Summers Family Fun. But Buffy did feel better knowing that she'd offered, even if she'd only done so initially because of her mother's insistence.<p>

Buffy scanned the room for Angel. The only light in the room came from a single, flickering candle. Buffy knew immediately that Angel had had another nightmare. He stood in the middle of the room, going through the motions of a very graceful Tai Chi workout.

Buffy knew it was Tai Chi. She'd asked a few days ago. Well, this seemed like the perfect time to learn.

Instead of slipping on one of his shirts (she did love to sleep in them), she changed into some yoga pants and a tank top. She came to stand beside him, and waited for him to acknowledge her. After about a minute, realizing that she wasn't going to move, Angel glanced at her.

"Teach me," Buffy demanded gently.

Even though he was trying to calm his own frenzied state, Angel was unable to deny her request. Maybe it would help. Buffy was the best medicine. She always helped.

He showed her a few basics, and then went back to his routine. Buffy mirrored his movements, and caught on quickly. Soon it was like she had been doing Tai Chi just as long as Angel had. They were perfectly in sync, moving in one fluid motion. Buffy had never felt calmer than she did now. She was so relaxed, so focused. She realized now why Angel always resorted to Tai Chi after his nightmares.

Buffy turned then, and brought her arms down, exhaling slowly. However, all concentration was lost when Angel's arms came down over her head. He pulled her to him as his arms wrapped tighter around her torso. Buffy looked over her shoulder at him, and was surprised by the heat of his gaze.

Her stomach began to flutter in anticipation, her heartbeat sped, her breathing quickened. Angel's lips crashed down on hers and it was like a fire ignited, quickly consuming them both. Angel had her undressed before she could even blink, and she was falling onto the bed before she could catch her breath. Anywhere Angel's hands caressed her it sent shockwaves of pleasure through her. His lips had strayed from hers, journeying along her jaw and behind her ear before continuing on down to her neck. He seemed to linger there more than usual, worshipping her neck with long, sucking kisses and playful, biting nips—and Buffy wasn't about to complain.

* * *

><p><em>She was at a dinner party. There was laughter, clinking glasses, little kids running around—a merry time. Buffy looked around, confused. Her imagination had gotten a whole lot more creative. Usually, her dreams were kind of boring—except for the dreams about Angel, and those just made her blush.<em>

_So, needless to say, Buffy was somewhat surprised to see Angel in the dream. He was underneath the staircase, talking to a woman._

_But none of this made sense._

_Buffy took a closer look at her surroundings. The tapestries, the people, the accents of the people…she was in Ireland. Buffy took in their clothes. The fancy, poufy dresses, the shiny shoe buckles…this was 19__th__ century Ireland. That meant…_

"_Please!" a whispered voice pleaded._

_Buffy looked back under the staircase. The man she was staring at was not Angel. It was Angelus._

_That was only confirmed when she saw Angelus grab the poor woman, Margaret, and bite her neck viciously. He drained her quickly, letting her body drop carelessly to the floor. _

_Angel stepped out of the staircase, and looked up at her, shocked. Buffy was pretty sure she looked to be just as shocked as he did._

Both Buffy and Angel bolted upright in bed, Buffy clutching the sheet over her chest as she drew in shaky breaths. She turned to look at Angel, who was already staring at her, wide-eyed, but Buffy could easily see the shame in his eyes.

"Okay," Buffy blew out a long stream of air. "That was weird."

"Buffy—"

"Yeah, really, really weird…"

"Buffy—"

"Like seriously weird. I'm think I'm freaking out…"

"Buffy—"

"That was like a twenty on my Weird-Stuff-O-Meter," Buffy continued to babble. "My scale was only one to ten…"

"Buffy!" Angel finally caught her attention. Seeing her wide, innocent, and yet still trusting green eyes stare up at him expectantly caused him to avert his gaze.

Sadly, the next place he looked made him feel worse.

Buffy unknowingly sported a gloriously purple hickey on her neck. Normally, this wouldn't have bothered him too much. But as Angel remembered his thoughts when he'd made that mark on her neck, it really bothered him. He'd wanted to bite her, to claim her as his. He wanted to Mark her as his. Her blood had been singing to him, calling him. He'd _really_ wanted to bite her.

"Angel?" Buffy's eyes were confused and worried. He knew this was not the first time she'd tried to get his attention. "Angel, what's wrong? What's happening?"

"We shared a dream, my dream," Angel answered as he ran a hand through his hair.

"That really happened though, didn't it?" Buffy asked hesitatingly. "That wasn't just a dream…it was a memory."

"Yes," Angel replied emotionlessly. "It was a memory."

"Okay…what do we do?" Buffy looked up at him again with her innocent, trusting eyes and Angel couldn't take it anymore.

"_We_ are not doing anything," Angel said abruptly as he rolled out of bed and hastily put his clothes back on.

"Where are you going?" Buffy demanded, meaning to sound authoritative, though she only managed to sound confused and hurt.

"Out," Angel answered simply.

"Angel," Buffy began, but Angel interrupted.

"Don't Buffy," he shook his head. "Just don't."

Buffy stared up at him, and Angel couldn't help but feel even worse at the trust he still saw shining in her eyes. Still. She trusted him. How? Anger began to pulse through him, anger at her for trusting him with all that she was after all that he'd done to her as Angelus.

"Why?" he demanded suddenly, causing Buffy to frown.

"Why, what?"

"Why do you trust me?" Angel demanded to know. "Why?"

"Because," Buffy answered simply.

"That's not an answer," Angel argued.

"I don't have to think about it, okay?" Buffy tried to explain. "You never had to earn my trust. You had it from the first moment I saw you. I can't explain it, I can't define it. I can't give you an exact moment when I realized that I trusted you with my life and my soul, okay? I just trust you." Buffy looked up at him earnestly—trustingly. "I love you," she said simply, as if it explained everything.

"You're wrong," Angel shook his head, and looked away, missing the tears that sprung to Buffy's eyes at his words. "You can't love me. It doesn't make sense—none of it makes sense."

After all that he'd done. He'd thought he'd been able to put it behind him, he'd thought he'd been able to move on from his latest stint as Angelus. And maybe he had to an extent. But now it was becoming clear. These dreams were showing him what he was, what he always had been, what he always would be. Maybe they were a good thing. Maybe they were helping him to see how he could protect her from himself.

The thought of leaving her was physically painful, but Angel was no stranger to pain—so he left, slamming the door behind him.

Buffy winced at the sound and didn't bother to stop the steady flow of tears that trailed down her cheeks.

* * *

><p><strong>Yes. I ended it there. Don't worry! There's a part two! :D<strong>

**Review and make me giddy,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Okie dokie, here we are! Part Two of Amends! Are we excited? I'm excited. **

**So, my research paper is due tomorrow. I still have to find another source and write another third of a page to make it long enough. Instead, I'm editing this chapter so I can post it tomorrow. My love for you guys knows no bounds apparently. :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Angel!**_

**Angel: What?**

_**Me: (takes a calming breath) I have to tell you something...I love you.**_

**Angel: (dubiously) Um...it sure doesn't seem like it...**

_**Me: (earnestly) But I do! I do love you, I promise! It's just that, well, I...**_

**Angel: (interrupts)...Have a sick sense of humor. Seriously, why are you making me want to kill myself? It's so obvious that it's The First.**

_**Me: (frowns confused) But you don't know about The First yet.**_

**Angel: The Angel in your other Buffyverse told me.**

**Other Angel: (smugly) Yeah, I totally ratted you out. Stop driving the other me crazy, okay?**

_**Me: (glares) Get back to your own Buffyverse! Don't you think that Buffy might, I don't know, need you?**_

**Other Angel: (rolls his eyes) She keeps reminding me that just because she's...**

_**Me: (scared) No! Don't spoil it!**_

**Angel: (curious) What? Buffy's what in the other universe?**

_**Me: Um...(avoids eye contact) she has the flu...(smiles brightly) So let's get back to this story, huh? No objections? Fantastic.**_

* * *

><p>Amends Part Two<p>

Angel walked aimlessly, not even knowing where he was going. He didn't care. He just needed to escape. Even though he he was already beginning to fight the frenzied haze that the dream had created. Even though he already felt the urge to turn back around, drop to his knees in front of Buffy and beg forgiveness…

But he kept on walking.

Emotions roiled through him so quickly, he couldn't possibly process them all. This left him off-balance and edgy. He hated it. Confusion. Yes, he was sure as hell confused. What was happening? Why was it happening? Was he going crazy? Had a century of guilt finally caught up with him? Was this what he was to become? Trapped in his own guilt, in his own mind, in the horrors of what he'd done? Would he ever have peace?

Of course he had peace. Buffy was that peace.

But he kept walking.

"Trouble sleeping?" Jenny asked suddenly appearing beside him.

Angel froze mid-step. "You're not here," he told himself.

"I'm always here," Jenny said seriously as she moved closer to him.

"Leave me alone," Angel demanded, though it sounded like a plea even to his own ears.

"I can't," Jenny said simply. "You won't let me."

"What do you want?" Angel asked as he once again resumed his walking.

"I wanna die in a bed surrounded by fat grandchildren, but I guess that's off the menu."

Angel looked away from her. "I'm sorry."

"You're sorry? For me? I'm dead. I'm over it," Jenny shrugged, although Angel missed the action. Maybe if he didn't look at her, she'd disappear. It didn't work.

"If you want to feel sorry for someone, you should feel sorry for yourself," Jenny told him. "Oh, but I guess you've already got that covered."

"I am sorry," Angel said earnestly, stopping once again to face her. "…for what I've done. What else do you want me to say?"

Suddenly, Jenny became Daniel. "I don't want to make you feel bad. I just want to show you who you are."

* * *

><p>"There's something wrong with him, Giles," Buffy told her Watcher earnestly. "I was <em>in<em> Angel's dream. There was stuff in there, stuff in his past that I couldn't possibly know about. He was dreaming, and somehow I got sucked in."

"I agree," Wesley said as he appeared from behind the bookshelves, reading from a large volume as he walked. "I've been researching. Angel asked me to."

Giles sighed, remembering how Angel had stared fearfully at nothing. "Yes, I suppose I should be looking as well."

"Oh, well then I'll look too," Buffy immediately volunteered. "Give me a book."

"Oh, me too," Xander said as he came in. "What?" he asked defensively when he saw their looks. "Look, I'm aware I haven't been the bestest friend to you when it comes to the whole Angel thing, and I don't know, maybe I, um, got caught up in the Hanukkah spirit."

Wesley began divvying out books. "The Black Chronicles," he said as he placed the book in Xander's hands. He turned to Buffy, giving her a thick volume. "The Diary of Luscious Temple, he's an expert on demons."

"I'd skip the parts about his gardens," Giles advised. "Unless you want to learn how to grow heartier beets."

Buffy looked to Xander, with a grateful, yet hesitant smile. "Are you sure this is how you want to spend your Christmas vacation?"

"Yeah," Xander smiled. "This is actually the most exciting thing I've got planned. Who else can claim that pathetic a social life?"

As if on cue, Willow entered. "Hey, guys! What are we doing?"

* * *

><p>Angel collapsed onto the floor of his apartment, shivering and panting in horror as another one of his past victims paced in front of him. "The thing I remember most was thinking how artful it was. In the dark, they looked just like they were sleeping. It wasn't until I bent down and kissed them goodnight that I felt how cold they were. You grabbed me and I thought, 'Who would go through so much trouble to arrange them like that?'"<p>

Angel looked up at the man; he didn't even know his name. Suddenly, he was no longer looking at the business man. It was Margaret. "But you see," she smiled at him. "That's what makes you different than other beasts. They kill to feed, but you took more pleasure in it than any other creature that walks or crawls."

"Oh, God!" Angel closed his eyes, trying to make it all go away. He didn't want to think about it. They were right of course, but he didn't want to think about it. He just wanted it all to stop. He just wanted it to _stop_.

"Yeah, cry out," Margaret mocked. "Make a scene."

Trying to escape, Angel jumped to his feet and ran past her, but Daniel blocked his way. "I was to be married that week," he said coldly. "But then, as I recall, you knew that."

"It wasn't me," Angel argued weakly, clinging to Buffy's faint, reassuring voice in his head.

Daniel transformed into Jenny. "It wasn't you?"

"A demon isn't a man," Angel argued, clinging to his logic. "I was a man once."

"Oh yes, and what a man you were," Jenny scowled derisively.

"A drunken, whoring layabout," Margaret sniffed disdainfully. "A terrible disappointment to your parents…"

"I was young," Angel defended. "I never had a chance to…"

"To what? Die of syphilis?" Margaret interrupted. "You were a worthless being before you were ever a monster."

Kathy's bright, happy face appeared briefly in Angel's mind, but it was gone so quickly that he didn't have a chance to cling to it.

Angel placed his hands over his ears. He couldn't take it anymore. He couldn't take it. He wasn't strong enough. He was weak. "Stop it!" he begged. "Stop!"

Margaret transformed into Jenny again, and gently removed his hands from over his ears. "I don't want to hurt you Angel, but you have to understand. Cruelty's the only thing you've ever truly had a talent for."

"That's not true," Angel shook his head, clinging to Buffy's faint voice in his head like a lifeline.

"Ssh," Jenny consoled as she pushed him back gently on the bed. "Rest," she commanded. "You think you can be with her, Angel, but you're wrong. You'll be her end. It's your destiny."

"I'll show you," she continued as she stroked his hair. "I'll show you."

_Angel knew he was dreaming and for once he didn't care. This was a good dream. _

_They were in Buffy's room, and she was asleep in her bed. He was sitting beside her, watching her peaceful slumber. Unable to help himself, Angel reached out and caressed her face lightly. Buffy opened her eyes blearily, but she quickly brightened as she blinked back the fogginess of sleep. She smiled up at him._

_And then she was straddling his waist, pressing her body against him in such a delicious way Angel couldn't help the low growl in his throat. He pulled her impossibly closer to him as his hands slid down her back. He grabbed the hem of her shirt, and quickly pulled it over her head. Greedily, his hands caressed her soft, warm skin as his lips moved along her collarbone._

_Buffy's hands ran down his chest, and before he knew it, his shirt had joined hers on the floor. They continued to kiss and hold each other tenderly, soaking up the loving passion that seemed to have engulfed them. _

_Now, they had switched positions. He was on top of her. Angel ran his hand up her outstretched arm until they'd clasped hands. Then, all of a sudden, there was a bright flash of lights and a loud crash of thunder. Angel grabbed her wrists roughly, pinning her arms to her side, and then he vamped out and sunk his fangs savagely into her neck._

Angel jerked awake with a gasp, wide-eyed and terrified.

"You want her," Jenny said with an evil smile that Angel didn't see.

"No," Angel panted, knowing that if it were possible his heart would be pounding in his chest.

"Take her," Jenny whispered in his ear. "Take what you want. Take it, take her blood. Taste it, it's yours. You'll be free…"

"No," Angel shook his head, closing his eyes and then opening them just as quickly. If he closed his eyes all he saw was Buffy, her lifeless eyes staring hauntingly back at him.

"You can't live for all eternity with all this pain," Jenny continued to whisper in his ear. "This is what you are. She trusts you. She'd _let_ you. Take it! And then you'll kill her…"

"I can't do it," Angel shook his head. "I can't."

"You have to do it," Jenny told him. "What else are you good for?"

"Get away from me!" Angel pleaded.

"Couldn't you just…feel her," Jenny taunted in his ear. "How soft her skin was? How she was so pliant in your arms? So trusting? It's too easy."

Angel shook his head fruitlessly, trying to fight, trying to find Buffy's voice in his head. She'd tell him. She'd remind him who he was. She'd make it better. Angel searched and searched his mind—Buffy was gone.

"You were never a fighter, Angel," Jenny whispered mockingly. "Don't start trying now. Sooner or later you will drink her."

"I'll never hurt her," Angel argued weakly.

"You already have," Jenny retorted easily. "You were born to hurt her. Have you learned nothing? As long as you're alive…"

"Then I'll die," Angel said flatly.

Jenny paused, considering. "You don't have the strength to kill yourself."

"I don't need strength," Angel replied, suddenly calm—content with this course of action. "I just need the sun to rise."

* * *

><p>Buffy paced in the library, her mind racing with her thoughts. The bad guy, apparently, was The First. He was incorporeal, and his little minions, Harbringers, were eyeless and creepy and could conjure spirit manifestations and set them on people—influence them—haunt them.<p>

She and Xander had gone to Willy's looking for answers, but they'd basically ended up back at square one. Underground. That was the only clue they had.

Faith had shown up at her house, claiming that the party was a no-go. She'd even brought gifts. Granted, she'd repeatedly told them that they were crappy, but the gesture truly meant a lot to Buffy, and when she wasn't busy worrying about Angel she would take the proper amount of time smiling over the positive gesture of goodwill.

But for now, Buffy's thoughts drifted back to her latest shared dream with Angel.

Buffy remembered her dream. Vividly. It had been a good dream, in the beginning. It had been a welcome dream, a nice reprieve—in the beginning. Surprisingly though, the fact that Angel had killed her was not the scariest thing about the dream. The scariest aspect of the dream was the little part of her that had liked it—being bitten. There was a part of her that longed for Angel to sink his fangs into her neck and drink from her. There was a part of her that told her it was right. She trusted Angel completely. Buffy knew that if Angel ever drank from her that he wouldn't take too much. He wouldn't kill her. She trusted him to stop.

Buffy shook those thoughts away for later pondering. She turned to Wesley and Giles, both of whom had their noses buried in books. "Okay, guys, what have we got?"

Wesley looked up from his book. "Um, 'A child shall be born of man and goat and have two heads, and The First shall only speak in riddles…'" Wesley frowned. "Not very helpful, I'm afraid."

"Giles?" Buffy looked to her other Watcher. "Come on, I'm begging."

"Um..." Giles read from his book silently for a moment. "More posturing I'm afraid," he explained as he read aloud. "For they are Harbringers of death—nothing shall grow above or below them—no seed shall flower, neither in man nor—" Giles made a so and so gesture with his hand. "They're rebels and they'll never ever be any good. Nothing specific about their haunts."

Something clicked in Buffy's brain. "Give me that," she said quickly. Giles placed the book in her hand, and she reread the passage that had caught her attention. "Nothing shall grow above or below…" she trailed off, completely amazed at how she hadn't realized it before. _Underground. Neither above nor below._

The dead Christmas trees.

* * *

><p>Buffy kicked open the gate to the Christmas tree farm and marched straight to the spot where she'd seen the dead Christmas trees. Once Buffy reached the right spot, she looked around, seeing it clearly for the first time. As she'd noticed before, the trees around the brown trees were green and alive. The brown trees themselves formed a circle.<p>

Buffy looked around for something to dig with and noticed a long-handled ax. Not hesitating, Buffy hefted the ax and swung it to the ground. It didn't take long to make a hole. The ground was dead and fell away like sand.

Dropping into the hole, Buffy landed a few feet down in a cave. It was lit with candles. They were everywhere. In the middle of the cave, circled around a little, makeshift stone table, were the Bringers. They were chanting endlessly, and the creepy monotone in which they spoke made Buffy shiver.

"Okay, ten more minutes of chanting and then you guys have got to go to bed," Buffy chided in her best patronizing mother-y voice.

Buffy didn't give them time to argue with her. She swung her ax at the closest of the three Bringers. It hit him in the stomach and he went down. Immediately, Buffy swung her weapon at another Bringer. Hitting him twice, once in the stomach and then once on the head, the final blow knocking him to the ground. The third one, the smartest or the most cowardly, ran away.

Buffy then used her ax to destroy the artifacts that were on the table.

Then, Jenny appeared.

"Hmm…I'm impressed," Jenny admitted.

Buffy hesitated. Was this mass confusion what Angel had been feeling all this time? Sadly, Buffy realized that he probably felt infinitely worse. However, Buffy looked back at Jenny defiantly. It wasn't really Jenny. Just her image.

This was The First.

"You won't get Angel," Buffy said firmly.

"You think you can fight me?" The First asked, still keeping Jenny's image. "I am not a demon, little girl. I am something you can't even conceive. The First Evil—I am beyond sin, beyond death. I am the thing the darkness fears. You'll never see me, but I am everywhere. Every being, every thought, every drop of hate…"

"Alright, I get it," Buffy interrupted annoyed. "You're Evil. Do we have to chat about it all day?"

"Angel will be dead by sunrise," The First told her with an evil smirk. "Your Christmas will be his wake."

"No," Buffy shook her head. He was bluffing. Angel would never kill himself, no matter how bad things got.

"You have no idea what you're dealing with," The First snarled impatient and frustrated by Buffy's blasé attitude.

"Lemme guess, is it…evil?" Buffy asked sarcastically.

The apparition of Jenny suddenly shrieked and swooped towards Buffy, morphing into a great clawed beast with horns before disappearing. However, it left with one final warning.

"Dead by sunrise!"

Buffy felt her stomach drop. She had to find Angel. Now.

With a speed she didn't know she possessed, Buffy ran out from the cave and climbed back through the hole she'd created. Her feet had barely hit the ground before she was running again, through the trees and out of the Christmas tree farm. She hit the sidewalk at a dead sprint.

However, it was when she'd been running for about a minute that she realized she had no idea where she was going. Buffy thought quickly, not bothering to slow down. Angel was actually one for the dramatic himself. He'd want to be on top of a mountain or something, where the sunlight would hit first. He'd have a good view.

But there were no mountains in Sunnydale. However, there _were_ hills.

Abruptly, Buffy changed course. She ran. She didn't feel the burn in her legs, she didn't feel the stitch in her side. She just ran.

Buffy didn't think about the fact that she may be too late. She didn't think about the fact that sunrise was only minutes away. She had enough time. She would make it. She would save him. There was simply no other alternative.

Buffy ran past the mansion on Crawford Street and to the hills behind it. She had never once slackened her pace.

Finally, she made it to the top of the hill and allowed herself a moment to catch her breath. Her legs felt wobbly now, and she struggled to stand.

But she'd made it in time.

In front of her, sitting down, his arms resting on his knees, was Angel. He didn't look at her as he spoke, "I bet half the kids down there are already awake," Angel told her quietly. "Lying in their beds…sneaking downstairs…waiting for day."

"Angel, please," Buffy begged as she dropped to her knees beside him. "Th-there's only a few minutes left."

"I know," Angel replied. "I can smell the sunrise long before it comes."

"I don't have time to explain this," Buffy said hurriedly. "You just have to trust me. That thing that was haunting you…"

"It wasn't haunting me," Angel interrupted, shaking his head. "It was showing me."

"Showing you?" Buffy repeated warily.

"What I am—"

"—were"

"And ever shall be," Angel finished.

"Is this about the dream?" Buffy asked, getting angry. "Is this about biting me?"

"I can't do it again, Buffy," Angel said tiredly. "I can't become a killer."

"It was just a dream," Buffy argued. "It wasn't real. You'd never hurt me."

"It's all I've ever done."

Buffy felt angry tears spring into her eyes. He was giving up. The one person who always told her to fight, to keep on going—he was quitting. "Dammit, Angel! Fight!"

"It's too hard."

"Angel, please!" Buffy was begging again. Her emotions were so sporadic even she couldn't keep up with them. "Please, you have to get inside!"

"It told me to kill you," Angel said lowly, ignoring her plea. "You were in the dream. You know. It told me to drink from you."

"What does it matter?" Buffy asked, wanting nothing but to know why he was doing this.

"Because I want to!" Angel suddenly yelled, causing Buffy to take a startled step back. "Because I want you so badly! I know that I might not be able to stop, and a part of me doesn't care!" he sobbed despairingly, but it quickly turned to anger. "Last night I thought about biting you, did you know that? I was so tempted. I almost gave in. It's getting harder. Seeing your blood pulse through your neck, mocking me! I want to Mark you, to claim you as mine! What does that make me, huh?"

"It makes you a vampire!" Buffy snapped back, as angry tears poured down her cheeks. "Do you think that I've forgotten? So what if you want to bite me? If we're all for being honest, I really wouldn't mind if you drank from me! A part of me wants it! Does that make you feel better? This isn't all about you!"

"I'm weak, Buffy!" Angel shouted back. "I've never been anything else! It's not the demon in me that needs killing, it's the man!"

"You're wrong," Buffy whispered, shaking her head. Buffy cradled his face in her hands, forcing him to look at her. She gently ran her hand through his hair, as she searched his troubled, saddened brown eyes. "Angel, when I look at you all I see is a man—a beautiful man inside and out. You have the biggest heart. You care so much that you punish yourself for things that aren't your fault. Angel, I love you so much. I trust you with my life. It's about time you trusted yourself," Buffy said softly as she caressed his face with her fingertips. "Have a little faith Angel, please, for me."

"Angel, you have the power to do real good," Buffy continued as Angel stared at her. She could see the light in his eyes. She was getting through to him. "You can make amends. But if you die now, then all you ever were was a monster."

Buffy glanced at the sky. It was beginning to lighten. "Angel, please," she begged. "Have a little faith, if not in yourself yet, then put it in us. Strong is living life. It's hard and it's painful, and it's every day. But we'll do it together."

Buffy kissed his lips softly. "You're not alone anymore," she whispered. "I'm here."

Angel's eyes met hers, and for a moment it was like time stood still.

"There's snow in your hair," Angel said after a moment.

"Huh?" Buffy asked dumbly.

Angel laughed, and once he started it was like he couldn't stop. It was too cathartic. "It's snowing!" he managed between chuckles.

Buffy finally looked around her, and she couldn't believe her eyes. White powder fell to the ground in big, fat snowflakes that she'd only seen in goofy, cartoon movies. It was snowing in Sunnydale.

And suddenly, Buffy was laughing too.

Angel reached up from his place on the ground and pulled her down to top of him. She landed on his chest, her hands splayed across his shoulders. Buffy's giggles slowly died down as she stared into his eyes, his warm, chocolate brown eyes. Angel returned her stare, and almost hesitantly reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. His hand lingered at the nape of her neck for a moment before he pulled her face to his.

Their lips met softly. There was no rush in this kiss. This kiss was all about love. It was about trust, and rebuilding that trust. Buffy opened her mouth to his, and Angel deepened the kiss without a second thought. This continued on for a few minutes before Buffy pulled away to breathe.

She looked around at the snow that had dusted everything in a layer of white. "Not that I'd necessarily mind staying out here and making snow angels with you," Buffy giggled at her pun. "But I'm getting cold…you think we can take this inside?"

Angel sat up, the movement causing Buffy to be sitting in lap. "That's probably a good idea."

Buffy stood and offered her hand to Angel. He took it and didn't let go as they began to walk leisurely back to his apartment. As they walked, Buffy leaned her head on his shoulder. "You know, I have your present at my house."

"I'll just stick a bow on your head," Angel joked, though there was a mischievous light in his eye that made Buffy wonder if he'd actually do it. "You're a gift."

"Are you going to wrap me up and put me in a box?" Buffy teased back.

Angel pulled her to a stop, and pressed his body against hers. "What are you talking about?" he teased as he fingered the hem of her shirt. "You're already wrapped."

Buffy's eyes were shining with laughter. She loved a playful Angel. "So I guess you'll just have to unwrap me then?"

"That's the plan," Angel smiled back as he resumed their trek.

After a moment, Buffy spoke again. "Hey Angel?"

"Yeah?"

"You know I could never ask for more than you, right?" Buffy told him earnestly, tugging on his hand, signaling him to stop.

Angel studied her for a moment. He searched her earnest gaze, so trusting, so honest. She'd saved him, again—from himself, again. She saw through the lies, the smokescreens, and his past. She saw him as he was, and she loved him.

Angel would do anything for her. He'd die for her. He'd kill for her. He'd do _anything_ for her. Now, he realized that killing himself would have accomplished nothing. It would only have hurt her, quite possibly worse than anything Angelus could ever have concocted. Angel had vowed to himself that he'd never hurt her again. He intended to keep that promise.

Remembering her question, Angel smiled softly. "Yeah, _Muirnín_. I know."

"Merry Christmas, Angel," Buffy reached up to peck his lips, but Angel wanted a little bit more.

"Merry Christmas, Buffy," he whispered against her lips before kissing her tenderly.

When he pulled away, they resumed their walk to his apartment. "You know, we're rebels," Buffy said as they walked. "We've kissed four times already and there's not a sprig of mistletoe in sight."

* * *

><p><strong>And...there we go! I hope you guys liked it! I had to change the big argument at the end because I'd already used some of those lines in previous chapters! lol For those of you who may have noticed, or thought that some of the dialogue sounded familiar, it's because I took a little bit from Two Sides of the Same Coin. It applied in this situation as well, and I couldn't think of a way to get the same point across, but write it differently! lol<strong>

**Okay, the next episode is "Helpless"! Don't expect anything close to canon! :D**

**Oh, and I forgot to put a little quote from the AISHB sequel in the last chapter! So...here's a quote from Chapter 1.**

**"Do I have to wear it?" - Angel**

**Reviews bring much love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Oh, wow! I can't believe I got this chapter together in time! It seems like I have no time at all to write lately! It depresses me! So, I hope you guys like this chapter! I know it's a little short compared to the usual, but alas, I gave Angel the perfect line to end with chappie with...**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Angel: Okay, what's he doing here?**

**Travers: (affronted) Excuse me?**

**Buffy: (glares) You heard him.**

**Travers: I demand to be treated with respect!**

_**Me: Hahahahahaha...ha...that's funny.**_

**Angel: Seriously, AC what is he doing here?**

_**Me: Oh, well, I have to make your life difficult somehow...**_

**Angel: (deadpan) I wanted to kill myself the last chapter. I think my life is difficult enough, thank you.**

_**Me: (eager earnestnss with a slightly dazed look in my eyes) I promise that I really do love you. Really. I do. A lot. Like, to the point of worship. I've already built a shrine...**_

**Angel: That's creepy.**

* * *

><p>Helpless<p>

Buffy landed hard on her back, having been flipped by her attacker. She struggled to squirm back to her feet, but her progress was halted when his body covered hers. Angel pinned her wrists beside her head and grinned down at her.

Oh, so he thought he'd won? Yeah, right…

Buffy smirked and flipped him over her head. Flipping back up to her feet, Buffy turned to face Angel once more. He was already on his feet, waiting for her. He seemed to hesitate for a moment before he lunged at her, throwing a wide punch that Buffy easily ducked. Angel tried a left hook, but Buffy blocked it, too.

They continued to dance like this. Ducking, blocking, weaving between the furniture—managing not to break a single thing. Being supernatural helped in this effort. Buffy spun on her heel, sending a roundhouse kick straight at Angel's head. At the last second, Angel managed to duck, but it didn't do him any good. Buffy had continued to spin downwards, sweeping his legs out from under him.

Seizing her opportunity, Buffy hurried over to the blanket and grabbed a baguette from the pre-birthday picnic dinner they'd shared. Clutching her makeshift weapon, Buffy rolled so that she was straddling Angel. She mimed staking him, and grinned at her victory.

"Gotcha!"

"Ugh, right in the heart," Angel sighed defeated. _Letting her win was definitely worth it—she always ended up on top of him. _

"Satisfied?" Buffy smiled.

Angel smirked; a playful light entered his eye. "No," he replied before reaching up to claim her lips.

Buffy smiled into the kiss as she ran her fingers through his hair. Angel's hands began roam, and Buffy couldn't fight a shiver of anticipation has his hand slipped under her shirt to caress her bare skin. Angel rolled on top of her, nipping playfully at her neck, causing a bubble of laughter to escape Buffy as she ran her hands down his back.

However, just when things were getting good, Buffy remembered something. "I've got to go," she said quickly, before closing her eyes in pleasure as Angel's hands began to wander lower.

"Funny," Angel murmured against her neck.

"I'm serious," Buffy breathed as he kissed down her neck.

"You don't sound too serious," Angel grinned smugly before capturing her lips, smothering any other form of protest.

"Your fault," Buffy said as soon as her lips were free to speak.

Angel sighed and buried his head in the crook of her neck. "What is more important than this?"

"At the moment?" Buffy replied with a smile. "Not much."

"Then why do you have to go?" Angel practically whined, causing Buffy to giggle.

"Because I have a huge test tomorrow," Buffy replied, although she couldn't help but add, "and because I have a date this weekend."

Angel's head snapped up. "What?"

"Yeah," Buffy grinned mischievously. It was so fun to tease him. "Older man, handsome—he likes it when I call him 'Daddy.'"

"Your father," Angel surmised with a smile.

Buffy nodded. "He's taking me to the ice show, which should be big fun. I could use a little fun."

"Well, I was trying—," Angel began, but Buffy abruptly cut him off with a kiss.

"Do you have to go _now?" _Angel stressed with a pout once he was able to speak.

Buffy debated. Truthfully, she _did_ have a test tomorrow. It was a huge test over the Roman Empire and she had yet to study a minute for it. Plus, she wanted to get to school on time as Giles had something he wanted to talk about.

So, if she stayed with Angel tonight, she would not study at all, and she wouldn't get to school on time. It wasn't like she didn't wake up in time. In fact, she _always_ woke up in time…she just didn't get out of bed in time. Angel was a morning person.

Decision made, Buffy grinned up at him. "I don't know," she said as she began to place little kisses on his neck. "I might be persuaded."

"I can do that."

Oh, boy could he.

* * *

><p>Buffy ran into the library, making a rather dramatic entrance. Seeing both Giles and Wesley's disappointed looks, she looked down, praying that she wasn't blushing. Wesley's disappointment didn't really bother her too much…it was Giles' knowing look. He knew exactly why she was late. <em>Awkward<em>.

"Hey, Giles," Buffy laughed. "Wesley," she acknowledged. "Um, why are you guys so early?"

Wesley raised his eyebrows and looked at the clock. "It's eight o' clock," he pointed out.

"You were supposed to be here half an hour ago," Giles narrowed his eyes.

"Really? You sure that clock isn't running fast?" Buffy asked as she set her bag on the table and sat down across from Wesley. "Cause, you know, life is a marathon, not a sprint."

"Buffy," Giles chastened and Buffy looked at the table.

"Sorry."

"Yes, well, moving on," Wesley said, sounding all too proper. Any other time and Buffy would have teased him. "I received a call from the Watchers Council."

"What?" Buffy asked sharply, dropping all teasing notions and focusing on Wesley.

"As part of the conditions stated at the Review, you agreed to be put through a test," Wesley reminded her, glancing at Giles, whom Buffy noted looked extremely broody.

"What kind of test?" Buffy hesitated, glancing at Giles again, but he remained quiet.

"For centuries, there has been a certain rite of passage each Slayer has gone through on her eighteenth birthday," Wesley explained. "The Cruciamentum."

"The Crucia-what?" Buffy stammered. "Now, it may just be me—but doesn't that sound just a little foreboding?"

"It's a test designed to measure the cunning and the intelligence of a Slayer, her resourcefulness," Wesley continued on. "Strength and power are only physical assets of a Slayer. To see if a Slayer is truly competent, they are divested of their abilities and…well," Wesley hesitated.

"Thrown into the lion's den," Giles finished coldly. "Typically, the Watcher would inject a concoction of muscle relaxants and adrenaline suppressors unknowingly to their Slayer," he explained. "Once they had fully taken effect, the Watcher would send them to an old building that housed a formidable vampire, and then lock the door behind them."

"You'd throw me in a building with a vamp without my Slayer strength?" Buffy looked at Giles horrified.

"Of course not," Giles replied. "This test in an archaic exercise in cruelty and I want no part of it."

"And you don't have to," Wesley told the older Watcher. "However, I, being your Watcher," he glanced at Giles. "Technically, at least," he added before sitting up to his full height. "As your Watcher, I must administer the sedatives in order to prepare you for the test."

"I don't think so," Buffy shook her head. "Nuh uh, no way, not happening."

"You agreed to this," Wesley reminded her.

"I did not agree to be drugged and then thrown to the wolves!" Buffy argued hotly.

"You agreed to be put through a test," Wesley repeated, seemingly unfazed by her anger. "You agreed to a test. This is the test."

Buffy fumed silently for a moment. "When will they be here?"

"They're due to arrive tonight," Wesley explained. "Now, normally, you would be completely unaware of the test," he said as he produced a case from underneath the table. "But, considering your circumstances, the Council has agreed that it will be alright if you are aware."

"You're going to be all snobby and uptight again when they get here, aren't you?" Buffy raised her eyebrows. "You'll go back to the pinstripe suits and the uppity, uppity, attitude."

Wesley frowned slightly. "I was never snobby," he argued. "And though I will miss the comfort and versatility of my new wardrobe, yes, I will revert to the expected form," Wesley admitted.

Buffy's eyes narrowed as Wesley produced the syringe from the case, tapping it to release the air bubbles. "Did I mention I hate needles?" Buffy deadpanned.

"No," Wesley answered, looking at her expectantly.

Buffy hesitated. She looked at Giles, and then to Wesley. "Angel is going to be pissed."

Wesley winced. "Yes, well, let's tell him later," he offered nervously. "And preferably with you in front of me." Wesley took Buffy's proffered arm and injected the sedatives. "Perhaps then he won't throttle me."

* * *

><p>Angel walked through the mansion on Crawford Street, surveying the completed massive space. All and all, he thought he'd done a pretty good job. The kitchen had been updated. The master suite had been refurbished, and he'd made sure to put the biggest shower he could find in the bathroom. He had plans for that shower. Plans that specifically revolved around him and Buffy being cocooned in a blanket of steam and having hot water pour down on them as they…<p>

Angel shook his head, forcing himself to think of something else less distracting. Once again, he surveyed the room.

The main room had been decorated, and he'd been able to pull some stuff out of storage. Artifacts, paintings, weapons…he actually had room for a full-fledged weapons cabinet now. Angel surveyed his work again. Yep, he'd done well.

Ever since returning from London, he and Buffy had hardly spent a night a part. No one commented or said anything, but all the Scoobies knew that they were practically living together. And however great his apartment was…it was just a little small.

Hence, moving into the mansion.

The only minor tidbit was that Buffy didn't know yet. Of course, it was a surprise, so she wasn't supposed to know anyway. Angel checked his watch and noted that it was getting late. He was supposed to meet Buffy at the library.

Locking the door, Angel walked out to his car—another thing he'd gotten to pull out of storage. For a moment, Angel stopped to admire the Plymouth. It was a classy, shiny black convertible, and it had tons of horsepower under the hood. It was beautiful.

Admiring officially done, Angel slid into the driver's seat. He couldn't help but grin when he turned the key and heard the engine purr contentedly. Pulling out onto the street, Angel drove to the library, wondering what Buffy had to tell him.

When he parked outside the school five minutes later, he was still wondering what Buffy had to tell him. What could be so important that it required them to meet at the library? Giles and Wesley's cars were out front, and Angel recognized Oz's van, too. So, everyone was here…why?

Frowning slightly, Angel made his way into the school and to the library.

"Angel," Buffy smiled at him, but Angel knew that she was nervous about something. Subtle clues like shifting her weight from foot to foot every now and then, darting her eyes away from him for a moment…

"What's wrong?" Angel asked suspiciously, though caution seeped into his tone.

Buffy smiled nervously. "Why does something have to be wrong?"

"Buffy," Angel said seriously as he stole a glance throughout the room. It hadn't escaped his notice that everyone was watching them intently, and Angel really didn't want to make too much of a scene.

Buffy sighed and ran a hand through her hair. "Um, well, you see…"

"Quentin Travers is on his way," Wesley interrupted, cutting off Buffy's incoherent stammers.

"Why?" Angel asked lowly with a dangerous, protective glint in his eye as he stole a glance at Buffy.

"During the Review, Buffy agreed to undergo a test," Wesley explained. "It's time for that test."

"It's called the Cruciamentum," Giles elaborated with coldness in his tone that had nothing to do with Angel. "It's designed to test a Slayer's ingenuity and resourcefulness."

"Okay," Angel sighed, closing his eyes for a moment before looking at Buffy. "It's just a test," he said reassuringly. "You'll do fine."

When Buffy didn't meet his eyes, Angel frowned.

"I don't have my Slayer strength anymore," Buffy admitted quietly, glancing up at him quickly before looking away.

Now, Angel was even more worried. "What?"

"Buffy," Wesley murmured, his lips barely moving. "Help."

"Why would you need her help?" Angel's eyes narrowed as he observed his friend who was clad in a three-piece pinstripe suit—like what he'd worn before he'd come to Sunnydale. "What did you do?"

"Angel, don't kill him," Buffy spoke up, meeting his eyes and holding his gaze for the first time since he'd arrived. "I agreed."

"Agreed to what?" Angel asked lowly, frustrated that everyone was giving him one detail at a time.

"I-I took Buffy's Slayer abilities away," Wesley explained, speaking with more confidence than he felt. "The Watchers have developed a concoction of muscle relaxants and adrenaline suppressors that would make it seem as though the Slayer had no heightened abilities."

As Wesley had continued to speak, a low, resonating growl had begun to build in Angel's chest. "You what?" he snapped.

"Okay, this is example A," Buffy stepped forward toward Angel and hit him in the chest as hard as she could. "Ow," Buffy said empathetically as she shook her hand. "See?"

Angel looked at her blankly for a moment, stunned. He'd barely felt her punch. As the shock of Buffy without her Slayer strength wore off, Angel felt anger rise in his veins. Wesley had done this. The Watchers had done this. They'd made her defenseless. What chance did she stand against a vampire without her Slayer strength? Or her coordination?

"What exactly is this test?" Angel asked, masking his anger for a moment in an eerie calm that scared Wesley more than any amount of fury Angel could have unleashed.

"Essentially, Buffy is...um, locked inside a building…with a vampire worthy of her, um, abilities," Wesley answered nervously.

"Without her strength," Angel stated dangerously. "Defenseless," he continued as he took a threatening step forward toward Wesley. "You son of a—"

"Angel," Buffy planted herself between Angel and Wesley, placing a calming hand on Angel's chest to halt his advance on the nervous and scared Watcher. Angel wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close as if he were ready to sweep her into his arms and haul her out of the library at a moment's notice.

"Don't kill Wes," Buffy ordered softly, and Angel hated the fear he saw in her green eyes. This situation was scaring her just as much as it was him. "It's not his fault."

Angel glared at Wesley one more time before pursing his lips. "Fine."

Willow spoke up after a moment of tense silence. "Okay..."

"Now that it appears Wesley will stay in the land of the living," Xander picked up where his oldest best friend had left off. "When are the stuffy Watchers going to get here?"

"Mr. Travers!" Wesley suddenly beamed, moving forward to shake the man's hand as Xander, along with the Scoobies, watched the exchange with varying looks of displeasure. "How are you?"

"Fine, fine," Travers waved dismissively. "How is everything here?"

Wesley, doing his best stuffy, snobbish, Watcher-y persona replied confidently. "It's going as well as to be expected. Miss Summers has proven to be quite the challenge, but I believe we have made progress."

"Lovely!" Travers nodded affirmatively. "Good, good, and how is everything…else?" he asked lowering his voice, although no one missed the pointed glances he threw Angel and Giles.

"Nothing I have not been able to handle," Wesley replied subdued with a note of arrogant pride in his voice he knew was making Buffy's skin crawl. He thought he was proving to be a fairly decent actor.

"Wonderful," Travers praised. "Now," he said as he moved past Wesley and toward Buffy…or at least where he assumed Buffy to be. It appeared that Angelus was just as protective of the Slayer now as he was in London.

Buffy stepped out from behind Angel, sending him a disapproving glare. She might not have her Slayer strength anymore, but she wasn't made of glass. "Miss Summers," Travers greeted. "How are you feeling?"

"Like a million bucks," Buffy replied with a smile. "Typical human strength…really bad coordination—it's great."

Travers smile tightened. "Yes, well," he chuckled. "That is part of the Cruciamentum. We must see if you are truly as good as it appears on paper."

Everyone in the room glared at Travers, but the man didn't seem to notice. "Rupert, how's retirement?" Travers asked politely.

"Thrilling," Giles deadpanned.

Now that it seemed Travers was satisfied he'd exchanged enough pleasantries, he got down to business. "Now, I came here to set the conditions," he explained. "As I'm sure you already know, the Cruciamentum is usually a blind test, but considering the fact that Rupert would have told you about the test anyway, the Council saw no point in trying to keep it secret." Travers pressed his lips in a tight line of disapproval for a moment before continuing. "Seeing as how your circumstances will be different, I'm going to set a few ground rules."

"You are not to go looking for the location that currently houses your opponent," Travers said sternly. "Nor are you to send Angelus or Rupert or anyone else to go looking for it, is that clear?"

"Crystal," Buffy snapped.

Travers looked to Giles next. "You are forbidden to mention any knowledge of past Cruciamentums. Any clue or advice you give must only be for emotional support—nothing factually based. This must test her abilities, not ideas from others."

Giles didn't comment. He only glared at Travers until the man looked away.

Travers looked directly at Angel now, arrogant enough to look him in the eye and hold his gaze unflinchingly. "You cannot interfere in any capacity. If I learn that you do, the test is invalid and Miss Summers fails. Are we clear?"

Angel's eyes burned with a fiery hate. It was so blatantly clear on his face that Travers forced himself to stand tall and not to tremble—even if his adrenaline was pumping through his veins and he was fighting the urge to turn around and run for his life.

"Yeah," Angel finally spoke, though it was more akin to a snarl. "We're clear."

"Excellent."

* * *

><p>"I'll kill him," Angel paced in front of the bed in his apartment. "I'll kill him."<p>

Buffy sat on the bed silently, watching him pace. "You won't kill him."

"No," Angel admitted frustrated. "But I can sure as hell think about it."

"Angel, calm down," Buffy pleaded quietly. "Please?"

Hearing her tone, Angel halted his manic pacing and took a deep, unneeded breath. He sat down next to her on the bed and wrapped his arms around her. Buffy buried her head in his chest for a moment, her hand fisting in his shirt. "I'm scared, too," she told him softly. "I feel so helpless. I can't do anything anymore. I can't throw knives. I can't throw a punch. I'm weak."

"You're not weak," Angel argued gently. "You could never be weak."

"I don't know how I'm going to do this," Buffy admitted, and Angel could tell by her voice that she was getting teary.

"Hey, ssh," Angel consoled, hugging her tighter and placing a tender kiss in her hair. "You can do this. I know you can."

"But how?" Buffy questioned. "He'll be stronger than me, faster than me…"

"You will win," Angel cut her off. "You will," he repeated confidently for both their benefits.

Angel didn't doubt Buffy's ability. She was much cleverer than she gave herself credit for. Angel knew that. What Angel didn't like was the fact that he couldn't interfere without Buffy failing the test. Of course, it wasn't like he would have interfered in the first place—unless Buffy's life was threatened.

Which was exactly why Travers had warned him not to interfere; Travers knew that if at any point in the test it appeared as though Buffy were going to lose that Angel wouldn't hesitate to jump in and snap the vamp's neck. That's what Angel hated. Travers wanted Angel to sit back and watch Buffy die. Because that's what would happen if Buffy lost, she'd die.

Well, to hell with Travers' rules. Buffy wasn't going to die.

"I won't let anything happen to you," Angel assured her softly as he stroked her hair and kissed her temple. "Promise."

* * *

><p><strong>Okay, so, that's that! Angel is going to ignore Travers' little rule! But, the million dollar question is...in the end, will he be put into a situation where he has to? Hmm...how difficult to I want to make this Cruciamentum? What surprises could I have planned? (evil laugh)<strong>

**Okay! So, quote from the AISHB sequel! This is from chapter 2!**

**"What is it with you and blondes?" -Cordy**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: Okay, first thing's first...sorry this is late! I actually have a funny story to share about why this is late. So, it's Friday night, and I'm laying in bed, my laptop is resting on my lap (laptops are so aptly named)...anywho, so I'm sitting there, typing away...**

**The next thing I know, my father is standing the doorway, dressed in camo, about to go hunting. It's five in the morning, and he simply raises an eyebrow and goes, "Do you want the light off?"**

**Obviously, my writing habits no longer surprise him.**

**So, apparently, I fell asleep writing (forgive me). I swear it's not because this chapter is boring! Far from it! It's actually one of my favorites...but it just got so damn long! I didn't mean for it to be this long, but alas, that is how it turned out!**

**There's lots of things I love about this chapter! We have a very special present to be given, some wonderfully fluffy B/A moments, a really-want-to-pummel-Travers-moment(s), Wesley has an Academy Award worthy performance, and last but certainly not least...someone very important gets punched at the end of this chapter. It's one of my favorite moments I've ever written and it made me giggle.**

**So...that said...let's get to it, shall we?**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

**Angel: I'm not happy with you.**

**Buffy: Yeah, me either.**

_**Me: (pouts) Why? What did I do?**_

**Buffy: Seriously? (turns to Angel) Is she being serious?**

**Angel: Yeah, she's actually serious.**

_**Me: Okay, so I might have made life just a little difficult for you...**_

**Buffy: You sicced Travers on me!**

_**Me: (giggles nervously) Uh, yeah...**_

**Angel: You still took away her powers, even though _you_ have _complete_ control over this episode!**

**Buffy: He's right you know. What's the point in rewriting all these episodes if you still put me through all this crap?**

_**Me: Well, you know, I...you know what? I'm not apologizing! You need to grow as characters! I have to have you progress and become even more awesome than you are now (looks pointedly at Angel)...**_

**Angel: (nervously to Buffy) Why is she looking at me like that?**

_**Me: (smiles) Oh, I have plans for you. Lots of plans.**_

* * *

><p>Chapter 24<p>

Buffy walked into her house alone. Angel had offered to walk her home, but Buffy had utterly refused. After all, just because she was without her strength didn't mean she was fragile. She wasn't made of glass.

Even though she loved a protective Angel, sometimes it could get _very_ annoying _very_ quickly.

This was one of those times.

Hearing her mother in the kitchen, Buffy altered her course to see what her mother was up to. "Buffy?" Joyce questioned, sensing someone behind her. She turned away from the stove to smile at her daughter.

"Present," Buffy answered absently, until she noticed the elegant floral arrangement on the counter. "Ooo, present," she smiled genuinely with excitement. This was an excellent pick-me-up.

Joyce's smile faltered. "Uh, they're not..." she fumbled, and Buffy frowned. "They're from your father," Joyce continued with an apologetic tone that caused Buffy's brief giddiness to fade.

Buffy took the card from the arrangement and read her father's apology note. Trying to fight back her tears of disappointment, Buffy sighed. This was probably for the best, what with her _test_ coming up. She couldn't have left town anyway. She looked at the two tickets her father had sent. Maybe she could give them to Oz and Willow.

Unaware of her daughter's silent resignation, Joyce tried to help. "I-If you want I could ask someone to cover for me at the gallery," she offered, trying to make things better. "I-I mean, if you want me to take you."

"No, thanks," Buffy shook her head. "I-I was just thinking it might be nice to have a quiet birthday," she said absently, knowing that the exact opposite always seemed to be true. What with everything that had happened on her seventeenth birthday, and now what would happen on her eighteenth…

"So…" Buffy smiled wanly at her mother. "What's for dinner?"

* * *

><p>Wesley pulled his coat around him tighter as a rather chilly breeze caused him to shiver slightly. The young Watcher was still getting used to the fact that Americans seemed to drive everywhere. He was still in the habit of walking most places, and the idea of using a car just to drive a few blocks seemed like a waste. Besides, he liked the exercise.<p>

Seeing his destination looming ahead, Wesley took in the dilapidated structure. A termite-eaten sign hung crookedly on the front of the old house, reading: "Sunnydale Arms. Rooms for let. Breakfast included, inquire within."

Wesley shook his head at the dreary building once more before pushing open the door. It creaked and groaned loudly, exactly like the doors in the terrible horror movies Buffy had forced him to watch one night. Wesley was sure he'd lost some brain cells during that dreadful six hour marathon—though he would never look at a clown the same way again.

Wesley blinked a couple of times, his eyes adjusting to the dim lighting as he shut the door behind him. The distinct, musty smell of disuse rankled throughout the house, and Wesley fought the urge to sneeze. The sound would be too loud for this completely too quiet space.

The furniture was torn, and the stuffing from the couch, chairs, and pillows lay strewn about in moldy clumps. The wallpaper was yellow and peeling and deteriorating bookshelves were broken and cracked. Books lay scattered across the floor, and the sight of the poor objects made Wesley frown. Books should not be treated in such fashion.

A scraping sound caused Wesley to look to his left, where he saw a Watcher bricking up one of the windows. Finally, his eyes found Travers who was overseeing the bricklayer's work. Wesley approached him, and they stood in companionable silence for a moment.

Just when Wesley was about to speak, Travers turned away from him to talk to a Watcher coming up from the stairs. "How much longer Hobson?"

"Five, maybe six hours sir," Hobson answered immediately.

This answer seemed to satisfy Travers. "Once you finish, you and Blair can get some rest," he dictated before adding seriously, "but sleep in shifts."

Hobson nodded before turning back down the stairs, presumably to return to work.

"We're getting very close," Travers said as he walked methodically back towards the living room, where a low fire burned. "The Slayer's preparations are almost complete."

"Fantastic," Wesley nodded positively.

"I assume you weren't followed?"

"No," Wesley shook his head. "Neither Miss Summers nor her friends tried to follow my journey here."

Travers looked mildly surprised before it gave way to a smug pride. "I imagine that has something to do with your influence," he praised. "I knew you were meant for this job Mr. Wyndam-Pryce."

"Thank you," Wesley smiled, hoping he looked as though Travers' praise meant everything to him.

"How are things?" Travers asked as he poured himself a glass of wine from a bottle that had previously rested on a rickety table. "Your reports are immaculate, but I've always thought that verbal discussion far exceeded what could be said on paper." Seizing a second wine glass, Travers proceeded to pour a generous amount of red liquid into it.

"Ah, yes, I quite agree," Wesley said as he took the proffered glass from Travers who now took a sip of his own. "Miss Summers is quite stubborn," he began honestly. That was nothing but the truth. "Though I must admit that she has secured a fierce loyalty amongst her friends," he admitted with a sigh, as if it both troubled and amused him. "I continue to try and slowly weed them out of her life, at least her, uh, night life."

"They continue to help her Slay?" Travers questioned pointedly.

"They try," Wesley corrected with a slight smirk, portraying the arrogance of what he hoped was someone who thought that they were the 'stuff' as Buffy would say.

Travers chuckled. "Marvelous," he commended. "And Rupert?"

"Stays out of my way, just as he promised," Wesley replied quickly, twisting his lips in distaste. "I try and return the favor."

"I assume he still maintains a place in Miss Summers' life?" Travers inquired, and Wesley nodded.

"He cares for her," Wesley sighed as if he couldn't understand it. "He was such a great Watcher. I don't understand how he could lose his focus."

Travers nodded in agreement, staring into the fire and sipping his wine for a moment. "What about Angelus?" he asked once he'd finished gathering his thoughts or absorbing the information, Wesley wasn't sure.

"He's always with her," Wesley answered immediately, glad that he could be completely truthful for once during this conversation. "Where she is, he is and vice versa. While I find their relationship to be…" Wesley paused to consider his words. "Odd," he continued, "I cannot deny that it is fascinating."

"How so?" Travers questioned as he took a more generous sip of his wine.

"They rely on each other in a way I've never seen," Wesley explained truthfully. "They have their own nonverbal language that consists of nothing more than vague expressions and long looks. Skills that take years or decades to manifest in most couples, they have perfected in just three years."

"Careful now, Wesley," Travers reprimanded slightly. "Do not get too invested."

"Forgive me," Wesley immediately apologized. "I'm far too inquisitive for my own good, I'm afraid."

"So, tell me." Travers sighed in regret as he drained the last of his wine. He reached for the bottle again, pouring a generous portion into the glass. "How do you think Miss Summers will fare?"

"I think it is quite possible she will pass," Wesley replied after considering for a moment. He didn't add the fact that Angel wouldn't let her fail. That would be rather counterproductive. "One vampire foe, however formidable, is nothing I don't believe she cannot handle—if she comes up with a satisfactory strategy."

Travers chuckled, "Miss Summers does not seem like the strategic type."

"No," Wesley agreed with a dry smile. "She most certainly is not." _But Angel is_, he added in his head. But once again, he kept it to himself.

"Do you believe that Angelus will stay out of our way?" Travers inquired.

"From what I've seen, yes," Wesley replied. "He seems to place a great deal on honor," he continued. "I doubt he will go against his word."

"Even if he has to watch Miss Summers die?"

Wesley hesitated a moment. Travers had spoken with such casualness, as if the question was just a passing query. How could he have ever looked up to this poor excuse of a man?

"I believe that he will do whatever he can to help her," Wesley answered after a moment, neither confirming nor denying definitively.

"I would be careful, Mr. Wyndam-Pryce," Travers advised. "That you do not become so invested in those two," he repeated, referring to Buffy and Angel once again. "They hardly need another supporter."

Wesley looked contrite. "Of course not."

"Wonderful."

Suddenly, a loud screaming was heard from downstairs and Wesley jumped, sloshing the red liquid in his glass. "Good, Lord," he breathed as he tried to calm his racing heart rate. "Sir, if I may be so bold as to ask, who have you apprehended for this Cruciamentum?"

Travers smiled, and Wesley didn't like it at all. "Kralik," he answered.

"_The_ Kralik?" Wesley asked, paling.

"Yes," Travers nodded, looking absolutely thrilled with himself. "But, you see my friend, that isn't even the best part."

Wesley didn't want to ask, but he knew he had to. "Sir?"

"Since Miss Summers knows about the circumstances of the Cruciamentum, the Council agreed that we should at least make some part of it a surprise," Travers explained.

"How so?" Wesley asked nervously, though he prayed it only sounded as though he was curious.

Travers smiled again, and Wesley didn't like this smile anymore than the first. It was too smug. It was too anticipatory. It was too victorious. "A second vampire."

"What?" Wesley asked sharply, but immediately backtracked at Travers raised eyebrow. "Forgive me, I'm simply shocked is all."

"Yes, yes, I am quite excited about it myself," Travers admitted with a gleam in his eye. "Quite excited indeed."

Wesley could only stare blankly at the fire, his mind racing. Buffy was good. She was great. She was the best, and had the potential to be _the_ best…but could she do this? Could she defeat two vampires without her strength? Without her speed? Without her superior reflexes and coordination?

Angel was right. Buffy was defenseless…how was she going to overcome these odds?

"The second vampire," Wesley began slowly. "He's not here, is he?"

Travers chuckled. "Of course not," he paused to take a drink of his wine. "Appius is much to volitale. He will be moved here an hour or so before the Cruciamentum begins."

Wesley shivered. He'd done his thesis on Appius...and he knew all too much about that particular vampire. "How do you know he and Kralik will not fight?" Wesley asked.

"Kralik has never paid attention to other vampires," Travers shrugged. "We'll give him a heavy dose of sedatives that will knock him out until it's time. And then," Travers smiled. "It begins."

* * *

><p>Buffy sat in the front seat of Angel's Plymouth wondering where they were going. Of course, the fact that apparently, Angel had had a car all this time amazed her. She'd asked him about it, and he'd just shrugged, saying he hadn't really needed it. That was true enough. You could get anywhere in Sunnydale by walking.<p>

But Buffy hadn't been able to keep herself from teasing him.

"_Black, seriously?"_ Buffy had raised her eyebrows when she'd taken in the paint color.

"_What?"_ Angel had questioned defensively. _"It's classy."_

Buffy shook her head slightly, a wry smile on her face. At the moment, she didn't really care where Angel was taking her. She just wanted to relax and have some quiet time with Angel before the chaos that would ensue tomorrow.

When they pulled up to the mansion on Crawford Street, Buffy's curiosity was peaked. However, she remained silent as Angel got out and walked around the front of the car to open her door for her. Buffy didn't know how she felt about chivalry sometimes. Sometimes, like now, it was sweet and adorable. Other times, it was just annoying. But, since this was her birthday, and he obviously wanted it to be special, she would indulge him.

He took her hand and led her up the walkway, before pausing at the front door and producing a key from his pocket. Buffy's eyes narrowed as she sensed his nervousness. What had he planned? A little bubble of excitement began to build in her stomach.

Angel swung the door open and gestured for her to enter first. With a curious smile, Buffy walked into the mansion, and then promptly stopped when she saw the main room. Buffy took in her surroundings with wonder. The mansion didn't look anything at all like it had the last time she'd been there. It was decorated in what she'd simply dubbed 'Angel-style,' classy and historical and new-age all at the same time. Somehow, he managed to combine all three elements.

Her eyes were drawn to a flickering orangey light and she saw a fire burning in the fireplace. In front of said fireplace was a blanket, and resting atop said blanket was a rectangular box with a bow on top. "Present!" Buffy squealed as she hurried over to the blanket and plopped down in front of the fire.

Angel chuckled, but followed. He sat down beside her, and Buffy sent him a bright smile before taking the bow of delicately. Then, she proceeded to rip off the wrapping paper without a second's hesitation. Amused by the contrast, and wondering why the bow was handled with such extra care, Angel raised an eyebrow.

"I always keep the bows," Buffy explained with a sheepish smile that Angel thought was the cutest thing he'd ever seen.

Buffy looked at the box, and decided to have a little fun. She picked up the box and seemed to gauge the weight of it, before she placed it against her ear and shook it. "Hmm…" she said thoughtfully. "Interesting," she giggled as Angel rolled his eyes.

Buffy pried the lid of the box slowly, peering through the tiny crack to catch a glimpse of whatever was inside. However, she needed more light. More curious now than ever, Buffy removed the lid from the box and gently picked up the small book that lay inside. Now, Buffy wasn't one for books, but she loved this one right away.

She read the title: _Sonnets from the Portuguese._

Buffy smiled softly at the book, gently turning to the title page where Angel had written one word in his elegant script. _Always_. The message was clear and simple, and Buffy wouldn't have it any other way.

"Thank you," she said lovingly. "That's beautiful."

Angel smiled, relieved that she liked it. "I figured you deserved a real birthday," he told her as he produced a cupcake from the basket that was behind him. Buffy hadn't even noticed it was there.

Angel took out a candle and lit the wick in the fire before setting it in the cupcake. He held it in front of Buffy. "Make a wish."

Buffy thought for a moment, before blowing out the candle. "Okay, I made my wish, now gimme," she demanded with a smile as she stole the cupcake from his clutches. "I get to have my cake and eat it too," she said to herself as she took a bite of the chocolate cupcake. "What else do you have in that basket?" she asked.

Angel began retrieving items from the basket. "Strawberries, chocolate, whipped cream…"

"Yummy," Buffy smiled before taking another bite of her cupcake.

Buffy swallowed and looked around the main room of the mansion. "What's with the hominess?"

"Yeah," Angel chuckled nervously. "Well, there's a reason for that."

Buffy raised her eyebrows as she chewed the last of her cupcake. "Hmm?"

"The apartment was getting a little small," Angel explained. "And I already bought this place, so…"

"Oh," Buffy replied wondering how to react. Was he moving into the mansion because she was crowding the apartment, or because he just wanted more space?

"So I figured we could, you know," Angel struggled to say the words. Not because he didn't want to say them, but because he was so damn nervous. "Move in," he managed.

"You want me to move in with you?" Buffy asked blankly. "Like, officially?"

Angel's nervousness was answer enough, though he added quickly, "If you want to."

Buffy smiled, easing his nerves. Then, she squealed and threw her arms around him before kissing him soundly. "Yes," she agreed before kissing him again with more passion.

Angel gathered her in his arms and began to carry her toward the bedroom, while Buffy contented herself to plant little kisses along his neck and jaw. "What about showing me the rest of the house?" she whispered as she gently pulled his earlobe with her teeth.

Angel couldn't take it anymore and pressed her into the wall halfway up the stairs. "Later," he answered before his lips found hers. Angel quickly deepened the kiss, muffling Buffy's appreciative moan.

Eventually, they made it upstairs and to the master suite, where Angel slowed things down. He caressed and kissed every inch of her, and Buffy didn't know anything else aside from the waves of pleasure rippling through her body.

Best birthday ever.

* * *

><p>Later, Buffy rested her head contentedly on Angel's chest as he lightly traced random patterns on her back. Even though she was completely relaxed, she couldn't help but wonder. What would happen tomorrow? What foe awaited her? How was she going to win?<p>

Buffy also couldn't help but think about being without her strength. Wesley had told her that she'd get her strength back in a few days. But even going two days without her Slayer abilities was tough. She hadn't realized how much she relied on her strength and heightened senses until they were gone. Things that she'd thought so simple were now so difficult. She couldn't even hop a fence. Granted, it was a rather tall fence, but still…it was a fence.

Who would she be if she wasn't the Slayer? It was so much a part of her that Buffy didn't know what she'd do if she wasn't the Slayer. She shuddered to think that she might still be the girl she was before she'd been Called. She'd made Cordelia look like a philosopher. What would she have done if she wasn't the Slayer? Who would she be? What would she offer? Would Angel even like her?

"Angel?" Buffy asked quietly.

"Hmm?"

"If I wasn't the Slayer, would you still like me?" she asked, lifting her head off his chest to look at him.

Angel was slightly taken aback by her question. It seemed to come out of nowhere, but he could guess the line of thought that had led to the question. "I saw you before you were the Slayer," he admitted.

"What?" Buffy's eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"I watched you and I saw you Called," Angel explained softly. "It was a bright afternoon in front of your school," he recalled perfectly. "You walked right down those steps and I knew that I loved you."

"Why?"

Angel smiled slightly at the question. The answer was so obvious to him. "'Cause I could see your heart," he told her gently. "You held it before you for everyone to see, and I worried that it would be bruised or torn. And more than anything in my life, I wanted to keep it safe…to warm it with my own."

Buffy looked at him a long moment before reaching up to kiss his lips softly. "That was beautiful," she told him with a smile. "Or, if taken literally, really gross."

Angel grimaced. "Yeah, I was just thinking that too."

Buffy turned on her back, her head resting on her own pillow instead of Angel's chest. "So," she sighed as she stared up at the ceiling. "Any ideas about tomorrow?"

"Take whatever you can carry that won't be too much of a hassle," Angel advised immediately. After all, he'd needed something to brood about earlier, and strategies were just the thing to fill the void.

"Okay, holy water, stakes, silver," Buffy recited. "Got it…that doesn't help much."

"No," Angel admitted as he turned on his side and propped himself up with his elbow, supporting his head in his hand. "It would be easier if we knew _who_ you were fighting."

"It would help if _you_ were there," Buffy retorted broodingly, cursing Travers.

"I can't do this for you," Angel sighed, though he wished the opposite.

"I wouldn't want you to do it for me," Buffy argued lightly. "Only, you know, lurk in the shadows, do that sexy thing you do and appear out of nowhere when I'm really in a jam…save the day, be my hero…"

A small smile pulled at Angel's lips. "You know if I could I would," he replied before adding seriously. "Buffy, you can do this. I know you can."

True worry shone in Buffy's eyes. "I don't know what I'm going to do. All my strength is gone…"

"This isn't about strength," Angel replied softly. "Not all battles are won with strength alone," he caressed her face. "You need to use what's in here." Angel tapped her temple with his finger. "You'll be fighting this guy, and you'll see something, something that you have that he needs to win. That's going to be your advantage, and that's how you'll win."

* * *

><p>The next day Buffy pretended as though she wasn't going into a life or death situation. Buffy slept in with Angel, and afterwards went birthday shopping with Willow. The rest of the Scoobies all hosted a little post-birthday party for her of their own at the Summers house. Everyone pretended that they weren't all waiting for night to fall.<p>

But eventually, that time came and the mood grew quiet and anxious. Forcing herself to remain calm, Buffy methodically packed the weapons she could. She had Angel load a crossbow, which had really pissed her off because she didn't have the strength to load it herself. Although, her agitation had quickly passed when Angel cracked an uncharacteristic joke—that was actually funny.

Buffy made sure she was wearing her cross necklace, and had a cross and a bottle of holy water tucked into her pockets. When she had absolutely all that she could carry in her bag without being hindered, Buffy took a deep breath and together she and Angel, along with the rest of the Scoobies, went to the address Wesley had given them only a few minutes earlier before heading off to meet them there.

When Buffy arrived, she immediately found Wesley and Travers, plus a few of Travers minions. Wesley and Travers seemed to be talking amicably, but Buffy couldn't hear what they were saying. When Travers noticed her arrival, he smiled as if this were nothing—like she wasn't possibly walking to her death.

"Miss Summers, how are you?" Travers inquired politely. "Nice birthday?"

Buffy just glared at him.

Travers cleared his throat awkwardly. "Yes, well," he gestured to the old inn. "Anytime you like."

That was it? Buffy looked from Travers to the inn and then back. Seriously, that was all he was going to say? Buffy shouldn't have been surprised.

Buffy took a deep breath, glancing over to where her friends had gathered. Giles and Xander were standing together, and Buffy didn't think she'd ever seen Xander look so serious. Giles' face was hard, but Buffy could see past it and she recognized the worry in his eyes. Buffy's gaze drifted the right and she found Oz and Willow. Willow didn't bother to hide her worried expression as she clung to Oz's arm, trying to seek some comfort. Oz himself looked as calm as ever, except for a slight worry line that had appeared on his forehead.

Lastly, her eyes connected with Angel's and they simply stared at each other for a few minutes. Buffy tried to pull as much strength from him as she could. She needed him. She needed that strength he gave her. It wasn't physical strength, but emotional strength, and that was what she needed in this moment. Buffy sent him a half-hearted, worried smile before tearing her gaze away from him and staring determinedly at the inn.

Without a second's hesitation, Buffy strode past the old sign, walked right up to the front door, opened the door and then shut it promptly behind her. A second later, she heard the lock click into place.

Ready. Set. Go.

* * *

><p>The moment the door locked behind Buffy, Angel was immediately on alert. He listened hard, and even from where he was, he could faintly hear the creak of the floorboards as Buffy made her way through the inn. Angel knew that if he were human, his heart would be beating a mile a minute. But as it was, all he could do was stand stock still and listen.<p>

It rankled. The fact that he couldn't do anything…that he just had to stand there and do nothing. He'd sworn to protect her, to keep her safe, and here he was, watching her walk into the lion's den. The urge to follow her slowly grew until he was pacing, just so he was moving. It almost felt like he was doing something.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Wesley approach. He wondered what his friend was doing. He wasn't really keeping up appearances if he chose to come over and talk to him. Wesley stopped a few feet away from him, and Angel stopped pacing, looking at him expectantly.

"What?" he snapped when Wesley didn't immediately speak.

Wesley got this funny look in his eye. A very serious look that screamed: "Pay attention to what I'm about to say." Angel raised an eyebrow and waited impatiently.

"You know, I hear there's a sale at the mall," Wesley said, taking Angel completely by surprise. He opened his mouth to interrupt, but Wesley continued. "It's a buy one get one free sale. Aren't those wonderful?" he asked pointedly. "Say, you walk into a store, _expecting_ to get _one_ leather jacket, but you get _two_ instead. Isn't that always just a pleasant _surprise?"_

Angel's eyes narrowed. Was Wesley really hinting at the fact that there were two vampires in the inn with Buffy instead of the one? Angel's gaze darted over to Travers for a split second, but it was long enough to see the faint anticipatory smirk on the man's face.

If only Angel knew who the vampires were, or at least the extra.

"Specifically?" Angel asked clipped, straining his ears to hear any sound from the building. Just then, he heard a scream and he couldn't help the instant step forward he took.

Wesley's lips barely moved, and his answer was so soft that only Angel could possibly hear. "Kralik and Appius."

Angel's stomach clenched in dread. Kralik had murdered and tortured more than a dozen women before he was turned after being put in a hospital for the criminally insane, and Appius was known for nothing but sheer brutality. Angel had to get into that inn. Now.

The only question was how?

* * *

><p>Buffy cautiously made her way through the inn. She tried to be quiet, but it was truly hopeless. Every step she took caused one of the old, rickety floorboards to creak loudly, giving away her position to her unseen foe. What was the point of trying to be sneaky if the floor wouldn't cooperate?<p>

A dying fire was her only light source, and it cast an eerie, orangey glow around the room. Buffy set her bag of weapons down on the couch. Looking around the room, Buffy swallowed nervously, fighting the fear that threatened to overwhelm her. The fact that she was without her strength and abilities had fully sunk in, and she was terrified. What chance did she have?

Buffy shook her head. She could do this. She just had to be smart. Angel was right. Slaying wasn't all about strength and power. It was about your smarts too. She could do this. She _would_ do this.

A door could be seen by a bookshelf and Buffy moved towards it. She took a deep breath before yanking the door open. However, this act of bravery was pointless. The doorway had been bricked up. Feeling slightly disappointed, Buffy shut the door.

Moving back out to the foyer, Buffy found another door. She tried to open it, but it wouldn't budge. Buffy shook it a few times, frustrated, but the door still wouldn't open. Giving up, Buffy sighed and began to turn around when a chill went down her spine. It was that creepy feeling she got when she knew someone was behind her.

Buffy's heart began to race and she couldn't help how her hands began to shake. How could she make a shot if her hands couldn't stop shaking in order to keep the crossbow steady? Buffy took a deep breath before spinning around and firing.

She missed.

Her vampire foe smiled evilly at her. He was a short, yet muscled vampire who had coal black eyes. He was dressed in what could pass as modern, but hinted at much older origins. His black shirt was very big and flowy, and he wore simple black pants. He didn't wear black near as well as Angel though.

But Buffy figured that this wasn't the best time to think about that.

The vamp lunged at her and ripped the crossbow from her grasp. In practically the same second his hand was around her throat, and Buffy was gasping for air. The vampire grinned and leaned in close, whispering in her ear, "You know, you are far prettier than the last Slayer I killed. I wonder if you will scream as much as she did?"

Buffy's eyes widened in fear, and she began to squirm, trying to break free. She grabbed his arm and then stomped down on his foot as hard as she could. It was an old trick, but there was a reason it was a classic—it always worked. Her attacker let her go and Buffy ran to the living room. Buffy opened her bag and reached in to grab a weapon, but she could hear her foe behind her. He grabbed her shoulder, but Buffy pulled herself away, running towards the door on the far wall by the bookcase.

She went to open the door, but it only revealed the bricked up doorway, exactly like she'd discovered before. Her fear had clouded her memory. Buffy cursed silently before turning back to face her attacker, her fear evident on her face.

"Forgive me," he said politely. "We have not been properly introduced. I'm Appius."

"Buffy," Buffy replied nervously. "Gotta admit I'm not too thrilled to meet you."

"Oh, you just have to get to know me," Appius grinned before he leapt at her.

Buffy grabbed the bookcase and pushed it over, causing it to land on Appius. He struggled, but couldn't lift it immediately, and Buffy took her chance to run over to her bag. Buffy reached in and just before her hand was able to wrap around a stake, Appius reached out and grabbed her ankle, eliciting a scream from Buffy.

Buffy crashed to the floor and looked around frantically for a weapon as Appius dug his fingernails into her ankle, and she knew his vice-like grip was drawing blood. Buffy's eyes settled on an andiron and she grabbed it. Wielding her new weapon, Buffy turned and beat Appius' arm with it. Finally, after what seemed like the hundredth hit, Appius let go and Buffy wasted no time in scrambling to her feet and grabbing her bag before fleeing to another room.

Buffy stopped in a hallway, debating whether she should seek refuge in any of the rooms. She quickly nixed that idea. It would only confine her to the small space, trapping her. She needed as much room to maneuver as possible.

Buffy took a step forward.

"Hide and seeeeeek…" a voice whispered from the darkness, causing Buffy to stop fearfully. She looked all around her, but she couldn't see anyone. "Hide and seek!" the voice continued to taunt.

Buffy was trembling now. This was a different voice. This wasn't Appius. This was someone else.

There were two vampires.

* * *

><p>Angel glanced around him. Travers and his little minions were all huddled around the gate, looking towards the inn with interested, anticipatory looks. Angel scowled and looked back towards the inn.<p>

"She'll be okay, Angel," Willow whispered comfortingly.

"I need to get in there," Angel whispered back.

"You can't," Willow argued sympathetically. "It's against the rules."

"To hell with the rules," Angel growled. "I need to get in there. They lied. There are two vampires."

"Nefarious plan," Oz nodded, his eyes narrowed. "Conspiracy."

Willow's eyes narrowed, too. "I'll give you a distraction," she said as she reached into her bag, producing some herbs that Buffy had gotten her for Christmas. She quickly put the herbs in a mesh, drawstring pouch, and whispered quickly, _"__Adeo meus suffragium , ego postulo a distraho unda of pulvis, velieris meus amicus__!" _

The small bag of herbs glowed brightly for a moment, before it began to smoke. Giles and Xander noticed it first and looked at her oddly. Willow tossed it to Xander, who, wanting nothing to do with it, tossed it towards Travers.

By now, the smoke exuding from the little bag had swallowed the Watchers and only the vague outline of their figures could be seen. After a round of hacking coughing and waving at the air, an angry Quentin Travers surveyed the Scoobies.

Angel was gone.

* * *

><p>Buffy moved past the stairs and entered the room adjacent. Inside the room was what looked like a coffin, and it appeared to be locked. However, Buffy wasn't going to take any chances. Hesitantly, she tried to pull open the door. It gave way, and Buffy had no choice but to swing the door open. Instantly, a hand was around her throat, but unlike with Appius, Buffy didn't struggle.<p>

This vampire was big and crazy-looking. Buffy knew that he wasn't all there in the head.

"Why did you come to the dark of the woods?" Kralik asked wonderingly, not noticing how Buffy had slipped her hand into her pocket. "Hmm…another vampire is here," he said as he enhaled. "Those little men must have brought him in after."

Kralik suddenly snatched Buffy's bag and looked into it. A handful of stakes could be seen, along with a smaller crossbow.

"Oh, look, you brought all these things to grandmother's house," he noted.

Kralik dropped the bag, and pulled Buffy closer. Grasping the cross in her pocket, Buffy surprised Kralik by pressing it into his chest. He jumped back, startled, and Buffy held the cross at arm's length in front of her as she slowly moved back from him.

Suddenly, Kralik grabbed her arm and yanked Buffy forward. The cross pressed into his chest once again, burning him, but it was like Kralik didn't notice. He laughed as he rubbed his chest with the cross, "Oh, no, no…a little lower. Oh, yes. Yes! Oh! Thank you very much!"

Eyes wide in disgusted horror, Buffy dropped the cross and ran into the kitchen. She promptly turned around and locked the door behind her. Buffy spun around to look for anything she could use as a weapon, only to discover that she was not alone in the room.

"So, we meet again!" Appius smiled as he stalked towards her. "I must admit, you are a tricky one…"

The door behind Buffy began to rattle, and Buffy's breath sped as she realized that she had absolutely nowhere to go. Appius was in front of her. Kralik was behind her…and she really didn't want to fight either one of them.

Buffy backed away from Appius steadily until her back hit the counter. He leaned over her and brushed a strand of hair away from her face. It was something that Angel often did and the sheer wrongness of anyone else duplicating the gesture caused Buffy to lash out. She swung her right fist as hard as she could, and it caught Appius on the temple.

Buffy pushed him away from her and tried to run away, but Appius reached out and grabbed her arm, throwing her into the wall. Buffy's head connected solidly with the wall, and Buffy felt a warm liquid in her hair and trailing down the side of her face. The world seemed to sway, and Buffy struggled to pick herself up as Appius stalked towards her once again. He reached out and yanked her to her feet. Buffy knew that he wanted to toss her around more, but she saw his eyes settle on her head wound. He inhaled and closed his eyes. A small smile appeared on his face, and it made Buffy's blood run cold.

Realizing what was coming, Buffy began to struggle. Appius growled angrily and pinned her against the wall. He began to lean in, and it seemed that no matter how hard Buffy struggled, she couldn't break free.

"I _really_ wouldn't do that if I were you," a very low, very angry voice warned.

Appius paused and looked up just as Angel's fist connected with his face. Buffy wanted to go to Angel, she really did, but she knew what she had to do. She sent him a grateful look that he didn't see, too focused on Appius who was getting to his feet.

Spinning on her heel, Buffy opened the door and went back out to find Kralik.

Seeing Angel had boosted her confidence. Just the fact that he was with her in this dreadful house of horrors was a comfort. Slowly, she made her way down the quiet hallway, expecting Kralik to jump out of nowhere at anytime.

Cautiously, she made her way to the stairs and when she saw that the coast was clear, Buffy made a mad dash up the stairs. This, of course, was exactly when Kralik reached through the rails and grabbed her ankle, causing her to fall onto the stairs. His hold tightened and he pulled her back down the stairs a ways. Buffy kicked and struggled to get away, but Kralik's hold seemed unbreakable.

Looking around for a weapon, Buffy grabbed a broken rail and stabbed it into Kralik's arm. A loud crash caused them both to look up, just in time to see Angel and Appius crash through a wall. Even though Buffy wanted to go help Angel, she knew that she would end up doing more harm than good. She'd just get in the way.

However, her decision on whether to escape Kralik or go to Angel was made for her when the former began to climb the stairs after her. Buffy hurried to her feet, and ran up the stairs, quickly going down a hallway. Buffy tried to open the closest door to her, but it was locked. Undeterred, she tried the next door and it swung open.

And then it promptly slammed shut.

Kralik appeared from behind the once open door, and shook his head. "If you stray from the path, you will lose your way," he lectured.

Kralik reached out and put his hand on her cheek. Buffy tried to push him away, but he was too strong. He touched her head wound, causing Buffy to wince. Then, he took his blood stained finger and licked it slowly, savoring the taste.

"I won't take it all," he assured her, seeing her terror. "I won't take it all."

Buffy continued to push him away, when suddenly Kralik let go of her and screamed, clutching his head. Seizing her chance, Buffy tried to run by him, but he shoved her into the wall. Stunned, Buffy watched as Kralik produced a pill bottle from his pocket, and tried desperately to get it open.

Angel's words the night before ran through her mind: _"You'll be fighting this guy, and you'll see something, something that you have that he needs to win. That's going to be your advantage, and that's how you'll win."_

Buffy knew how she would win.

Quickly, she grabbed the pill bottle from Kralik and ran away.

"No! No! No! No!" Kralik cried as he tried to follow her despite the pain in his head.

Buffy ran down the hall and saw an old laundry shoot. Without hesitation, Buffy leapt through it and slid down, landing on a table in the basement that collapsed under her weight. Buffy looked around for anything she could use. Her eyes landed on an old glass, and then it all clicked.

Taking the bottle of holy water from her pocket, Buffy quickly poured its contents into the glass. She set it in plain sight and then waited. She didn't have to wait long before Kralik was banging on the door. Soon, the wood splintered and he barged through the hole he'd made.

"Where are they? Where are they?" he demanded.

Kralik lunged towards her, seeing the pill bottle in her clutches. Buffy let the bottle go without a fight and let Kralik shove her out of the way. Buffy fell to the floor and then stayed there, watching as Kralik opened the pill bottle and then spotted the glass.

He popped the pills into his mouth and then downed the water to wash them down. Buffy got to her feet and didn't fight the smirk of triumph that graced her face.

Kralik turned around to face her, and looked perfectly fine for a moment when suddenly, his smile dropped from his face and he looked at her oddly. "Oh my…" he said as the hand that still clutched the glass began to tremble. "What have you…" Kralik trailed off as he began to shake more violently. "My pills!"

Buffy held up the empty bottle of holy water for him to see. Kralik began to grunt and groan in pain as smoke began to rise from his skin. "No, no, no…" he moaned.

"If I was at full Slayer power, I'd be punning right about now," Buffy said coolly.

"No! No!" Kralik screamed loudly one last time before he exploded into dust.

Buffy stared at Kralik's ashes for a moment, unbelievable relief rushing through her veins. It almost made her giddy. She'd won. She'd done it. No super strength. No heightened senses. No quick reflexes. Just her. Buffy.

A sharp growl of rage pulled Buffy back to reality, especially when the growl was followed by a crash that was the distinct sound of splintering wood. Buffy immediately dashed out of the basement and followed the noise of the fight. It led her down a hallway and back to the main room where she saw Angel take a punch to the temple.

However, he rolled with the punch and dealt one of his own, and the strength of the hit sent Appius flying back into the wall. Appius picked himself up and leapt at Angel, tackling him to the ground. Angel planted his feet on Appius' chest and flipped him over his head.

Appius landed hard on his back, and Buffy quickly grabbed a broken rail and staked him. The vampire exploded into dust and Buffy sighed heavily, all of her adrenaline gone. She was exhausted and she knew she'd been achy and sore for days.

Angel approached her slowly, not wanting to startle her. But the moment he opened his arms for her, Buffy immediately went to him, resting her head against his chest. Angel's arms wound around her waist and pulled her close. He buried his face in her hair and simply held her for a long moment before pulling away to look at her.

Gently, he tilted her face to the side so he could see the cut on her head. "It doesn't hurt too bad," Buffy said softly, seeing his frown.

"I don't like it when you're hurt," Angel told her once again pulling her close.

Buffy smiled tiredly against his chest. "You can't protect me from everything."

Angel kissed her hair. "I can try." They were silent for a moment longer before Angel spoke again. "They lied," he said coldly.

Buffy didn't have to ask to know he was talking about the Watchers. "Yeah," she replied. "Yeah, they did…are you going to kill them?"

"It's not _if_ I'll kill them, it's _how_," Angel corrected, controlling his anger—for the moment.

"You know you don't mean that," Buffy told him knowingly.

"Yeah," Angel admitted. "But I can still punch him."

* * *

><p>Buffy and Angel walked out of the inn together, and were immediately surrounded. Buffy found herself entrapped by Willow and Xander, and Angel got a knuckle bump from Oz. The moment Buffy was released by Willow and Xander, she found herself in an uncharacteristic hug from Giles. Buffy didn't mind though, and she hugged him back.<p>

"Wha—," Travers spluttered. "What—who—just _who_ do you think you _are_ Miss Summers?" he said as he descended upon the Scoobies.

Buffy pulled away from Giles to square off with Travers. Angel was immediately by her side, and Buffy took his hand. "The Slayer," Buffy answered simply, causing the Scoobies to smile.

This wasn't the response Travers expected and the truth of it stunned him into silence. He rounded on Angel next, "And you!" he snapped. "You deliberately—"

However, Travers didn't get to finish because Angel's fist connected with his jaw. Travers head whipped to the side, and everyone was silent for a moment before Angel spoke. "Leave," he ordered simply. His voice was steely and quiet, but everyone heard the carefully controlled anger beneath his calm tone. "You had your test. Buffy passed. Go."

Travers looked like he was about to argue, but Angel growled sharply, cutting off any retort he may have made. Huffing in frustration and false dignity, Travers gathered himself and turned abruptly on his heel. His little minions followed and they all climbed into their vehicles.

"Mr. Wyndam-Pryce," Travers said briskly before he entered the back of one of the black sedans.

Wesley raised his eyebrows, trying to keep the triumphant smirk off his face. "Sir?"

"Keep doing…" Travers fought for words. Even though this whole Cruciamentum had been a farce…Miss Summers had proven to be quite the Slayer. It was in the interest of the Council to continue her training. "Whatever it is you're doing."

"Yes, sir," Wesley replied with a small smile.

Travers nodded before getting into the car and driving off. Once the car was out of sight, Wesley turned towards the Scoobies and then did what Buffy had told him was a 'victory dance.'

Buffy, Angel and the Scoobies laughed and they all met Wesley at the gate. Together, all of them walked down the road, headed towards the Summers home. Willow walked arm in arm with both Xander and Oz. Giles and Wesley walked beside them in companionable silence, while Buffy and Angel walked hand in hand, with Buffy resting her head on his shoulder.

"I can't believe you actually punched him," Buffy giggled after walked in silence for a moment.

"I said I would," Angel retorted with a smile. "I should probably feel guilty," he admitted thoughtfully.

"Nah," Xander shook his head. "You've got enough to feel guilty about."

Everyone looked at Xander surprised. "That was…nice of you," Willow said slowly.

Xander looked at them, feigning hurt. "What? I can be nice…"

"To Angel?" Willow couldn't help but ask.

"What do you want me to do? Call him Dead Boy?" he asked chuckling.

"It would convince me that Hell hasn't frozen over," Angel replied honestly.

Xander smirked. "Shut up, Dead Boy."

Angel accepted that response, and Buffy just shook her head before leaning into him more as Angel wrapped his arm around her. Willow shoved Xander playfully before going back to Oz, planting a kiss on his cheek. Wesley had moved over to walk on Angel's other side and was enthusiastically explaining the plot of the latest book he'd read.

Giles sighed and shook his head, muttering, "And all is right in the world once again."

* * *

><p><strong>Yay! Another chapter down! Phew, that was a long one! Yikes! <strong>

**So...Angel punched Travers! I don't know about you, but I think that's epic.**

**Also, I want to say that if it seemed that Angel might have been a little out of character because he told off Travers, and really assumed a leadership role there for a minute...I did that on purpose. I'm starting Angel's character arc that will lead him into Angel S1...so, we'll be getting little glimpses of a more confident, man-in-charge Angel. Are you excited? I'm excited.**

**I'm also very excited for the next episodes! Yes, that's right...episodes. I'm combining "Bad Girls" and "Consequences." Also, I'm excited because I'm bringing in a new character! He is awesome and I love him...anyone wanna guess who? :D**

**Okay, so, since Angel punched Travers already...anyone feel left out of the violence?**

**If so, reviews punch Travers in the face,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	25. Chapter 25

**A/N: Sorry, sorry, sorry! I feel so guilty, you guys! One week might not be that long without an update, but it is for me! I haven't had any chance to write for the past month! It's really making me kinda cranky. School has completely taken over my free time and it's so annoying. Weekends are truly my time to write, and I usually devote them to writing, but I haven't been able to do that lately. My past six Saturdays, including this one, have been busy (I just got back from an AP Bio Prep Session a few hours ago, and once I got home I finished up this chapter). So, I have had absolutely no free time. Hence, the tardiness of this chapter. And on that note, because it appears that real life is conspiring against me at the moment, please don't expect every other day updates. Right now, I'm just going to try and get them out as soon as I can. :)**

**Still, I really, really hate that this is so late (at least by my standards anyway). So, I hope I made up for it with two particular scenes in this chapter! Can you believe that I've written two Buffy stories already, and am close to finishing the third? Me either. Now, what is even more unbelieveable is the fact that I've written two stories and am finishing up the third and I have yet to write a shower scene! Well, I have fixed that with this chapter! Yay! So, that's one scene I hope makes up for the tardiness. The second one is the very last scene and it might seem kinda out of nowhere but I thought it was hilarious.**

**Whew, so...on with the chapter?**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Sorry guys!**_

**Angel: You abandoned us for an entire week!**

_**Me: (brightens) Are you implying that you missed me?**_

**Angel: Well, um, maybe?**

**Buffy: Hey, what about me? Hello, I'm your girlfriend, your soulmate, your one and only? Ringing any bells?**

_**Me: (glares) Back off, Blondie! He was on the verge of admitting his feelings for me!**_

**Angel: Whoa, wait, what? No...I was just...**

_**Me: (smiles reassuringly) It's okay, Angel. I understand. You're still in denial. Don't worry, I still love you.**_

**Angel: (whispers to Buffy) She's crazy! Save me!**

* * *

><p>Chapter 25<p>

"Okay, Faith is going to be the death of me," Buffy griped exasperatedly as she fell onto the bed, having just gotten back from patrol.

It had been the normal type of patrol with Faith. Jump a lot of vampires, become outnumbered, almost get overwhelmed, kick lots of undead butt, and then live to tell the tale (with great annoyance) to Angel. This had become the pattern of Buffy's patrols with Faith. Tonight was a perfect example. She and Faith had been dusting some vampires, they got a little overwhelmed, and Buffy almost got bitten because Faith was too focused on whaling on a vamp to notice her sister Slayer's distress. And of course, before that, in another encounter with vamps, she and Faith had carried on a whole conversation about whether Buffy had ever had sex with Xander.

One word.

Ew.

Not that Buffy didn't love Xander because she did…she just didn't _love_ Xander. And it wasn't as if Buffy was actually going to tell Faith that she put in a little 'after-hours' with Angel. Buffy's eyebrows furrowed at that train of thought as another popped into her head. Faith still didn't know Angel's soul was anchored. Strangely, or rather not so strangely enough, this didn't bother Buffy one bit.

Angel lifted his head from his pillow to look at her. "You said that a few nights ago," he reminded her, forcing Buffy to focus on the conversation she'd started.

"Well, she proved it again tonight," Buffy shot back as she cuddled into his side, unable to hide a smile when Angel pulled her closer. However, her smile dropped when a vivid memory came to the forefront of her mind, which relit her previous annoyed, angry fire. "A vamp almost sunk his fangs into me," she ranted, not noticing how Angel tensed. "I mean, really? And Faith's just like, 'nicely diverted, B!' She still calls me B. Did I mention how much that annoys me?"

Angel just had to have one thing made clear. "That vamp that tried to bite you is dust, right?"

"Well, yeah," Buffy replied with a slight shrug. "Faith dusted him."

"Good," Angel said flatly as he held Buffy tighter. He really hadn't wanted to get up and hunt down the bastard that had even dared to go near _his_ Buffy…

Angel took a deep, unnecessary breath and closed his eyes, forcing his possessive, vengeful thoughts away. "And you would think that she'd have settled down a little by now," Buffy continued, oblivious to Angel's brief inner struggle. "I mean, seriously. It's like she has no responsibility."

"Responsibility is learned," Angel replied knowingly. "It takes some longer than others to learn that lesson."

Buffy sighed, forgetting about Faith for a moment. "You know what was weird though? One of the guys we were fighting…he had these swords, but we couldn't find them. I mean, they were there and I only looked away for a second…but when I looked back they were gone."

Angel perked up at that. "What did they look like?"

* * *

><p>"Hey, Giles! Wes!" Buffy called as she walked into the library after lunch with Willow, Xander, and Oz following close behind her.<p>

"Harvard, Yale, Wesleyan," Xander flipped through the envelopes as they walked through the doors. "Some German Polytechnical Institute, whose name I, uh," Xander paused and tried to read the name. After a few moments, he gave up. "Whose name I can't pronounce…" he sighed as he tossed the stack of Willow's early acceptance letters onto the table. "Is anyone else feeling intimidated?" Xander looked to Oz. "'Cause I'm just expecting to get thin slips of paper with the words, 'No Way' written in crayon."

"They're typing those now," Oz replied helpfully.

Xander nodded, "Hmm."

"I-I'm so overwhelmed," Willow gushed as Wesley and Giles appeared, each holding a book. Apparently, Buffy had interrupted another debate. Old school vs. New school Watcher-style was very entertaining to watch sometimes.

"I-I got in!" Willow looked up and pointed to the envelopes, directing Giles and Wesley's attention to her success. "To actual colleges! They're wooing me!"

"The wooing stage is always fun," Buffy smiled, though she wasn't necessarily referring to college 'wooing.' Her thoughts were more along the lines of wooing by a certain dark-eyed, broody, sexy, soulful vampire…

"But it's weird," Willow continued. "Now, rejection I can handle due to years of training, but this…" she trailed off with a happy, awed, sigh.

Wesley leafed through the envelopes. "Oxford!" he praised. "I do love Oxford."

"We're all very proud Willow," Giles gave the redhead a small smile, before turning to Buffy. "But, um, I do believe you wanted to talk about something else?"

"Ah, yes," Wesley set the envelopes down and looked at Buffy questioningly, remembering Angel's call to him earlier that morning. "Something about last night's patrol?"

"Swords," Buffy answered, getting down to business.

Xander raised his eyebrows. "Like the pointy kind?" he asked.

"And bejeweled and pretty?" Willow added.

"All of the above," Buffy answered, though she kept her eyes on her Watchers.

"Swords," Wesley repeated with a frown as he fished through an open box of books on the table.

"Sounds familiar," Giles' brows furrowed as he tried to remember.

"I don't know, but it made Angel kinda nervous, and I don't like it when he's nervous," Buffy said as she plopped down at the table. "He hardly ever gets nervous."

Wesley pulled out a book from the box and began to flip through it. "One long, one short?" he wanted to clarify, wondering if he and Angel had been on the same line of thought. Because, if so, then they could have a problem…

"Yeah," Buffy answered with a nod. "What's the what?"

"If it is whom I think Angel guessed," Wesley began as he finally found the correct page, handing it to Giles. "It's the El Eliminati, fifteenth century."

"Of course," Giles nodded, remembering. He looked at Buffy, "The El Eliminati were a duelist cult, quite deadly in their day."

"However, their numbers dwindled," Wesley picked up right where Giles left off. "Which was mainly due to an increase in anti-vampire activity and a lot of pointless dueling," he sighed before continuing. "What I believe Angel is worried about is the fact that the El Eliminati became the acolytes of the demon Balthazar, who brought them here, specifically. However, it is noted that happily enough, Balthazar was killed, though we do not know by whom."

"So, if this guy is dead, why is Angel all angsty?" Buffy asked confused. "I mean, he's dead. What's a few minions?"

"Well," Giles sighed and took off his glasses to clean them. "Many demons don't believe that Balthazar was killed."

"Oh," Buffy frowned.

"But what makes this guy so special?" Xander asked curiously.

"Balthazar had an amulet purported to give him strength," Wesley answered. "When he was killed, it was reported that a wealthy landowner by the name of…" he trailed off, noticing Buffy's raised eyebrows.

"I won't bore you with the details," Wesley said with a slight smile.

Buffy smirked, "Thanks. Much appreciation."

"However, in this case, um, the extraneous details are quite, uh, important," Giles looked to Wesley. "The landowners name was Gleaves, whose crypt is here in Sunnydale. They might be looking for the amulet for sentimental value."

"Right," Wesley nodded in agreement.

"But what if this guy isn't dead?" Buffy questioned, knowing that Angel probably thought along the same lines. "What if he's still alive?"

"Then we must get the amulet before they do," Giles replied seriously.

Buffy looked to Willow. "Guess that chemistry study jam is off the to-do list."

"You seriously have one of those?" Faith asked as she walked into the library.

"Ah, Faith," Wesley pulled himself to his full height, trying to exude some modicum of authority. Even though he'd been Buffy's Watcher (technically) for months, he and Faith had yet to come to a truce. In fact, she pretty much ignored him. Buffy told him he was lucky.

"You need to go with Buffy to the Gleaves crypt tonight," Wesley tried to order, but it only caused Faith to smirk.

"Screw that," she shrugged before turning and walking out.

Buffy shook her head and rose from her chair, patting Wesley on the shoulder. "That was a good try…but it still needs work. Commanding really isn't your forte, Wes."

Wesley tried not to pout. "She is not the best at being told what to do," he admitted with a sigh.

"Definitely not," Buffy agreed.

"Um, Buffy, would you…?" Giles trailed off, looking pointedly out the library doors that Faith had just walked out of.

"I'll see if I can get her back," Buffy answered exhaling loudly before hurrying to catch up with the dark-haired Slayer.

She caught up to her just outside, "Hey, Faith! Wait up!" Buffy walked beside Faith. "Look, I know you don't care for Wes—"

"You actually take orders from him?" Faith interrupted, disbelievingly. The guy was such a dork. _Although_, Faith thought, _B's a little goody-goody, of course she does what she's told._

"That's the job," Buffy replied. "And it's not orders. He's a friend."

"Yeah, yours, not mine," Faith said barely able to hide the bitterness in her tone. After all, Buffy had tons of friends, loyal friends. Friends that hung out with you and really cared about you and had study sessions with you…not to mention that Buffy had _Angel_.

"Well, what else can we do?" Buffy asked exasperatedly.

"Whatever we want," Faith replied immediately.

If only she could get Buffy to see who she truly was. She was all focused on being so good, and Faith just knew that there was a little bit of bad in there somewhere. Faith just had to get Buffy to see it and act on it—take a little stroll on the wild side.

"We're Slayers, girlfriend," she continued. "The Chosen Two. Why would we let him take all the fun out of it?"

Buffy frowned, not liking what Faith was implying. "Oh, that would be tragic," she said sarcastically. "Taking the fun out of slaying, stabbing, beheading…"

"Oh, like you don't dig it," Faith scoffed dubiously.

"I don't," Buffy shrugged.

"You're a liar," Faith shook her head, knowing that she was right. Buffy was just in denial. "I've seen you. Tell me staking a vamp doesn't get you just a little bit juiced. Come on, say it."

Buffy wanted to deny it, but she couldn't. She looked down to hide her smile, but Faith still saw it.

"You can't fool me," Faith said smugly. "The look in your eyes right after a kill? You're hungry for more."

Buffy shook her head. Maybe she did enjoy Slaying, the adrenaline rush. But she didn't do it for the rush. She did it because it was her duty, her responsibility. "You're way off base. What about the assignment?" she asked, wanting to get back on topic.

"How about you do the homework and I'll copy yours," Faith grinned before leaving.

Buffy frowned as she watched Faith go, feeling an odd sense of foreboding.

* * *

><p>It was chilly and dank in the dark, Gleaves family crypt. Scanning the room and making sure that she was alone, Buffy stepped into the space cautiously. Once she'd decided that she was the only living person in the crypt, Buffy began her search for the amulet.<p>

Angel had offered to go with her, but Buffy had told him no. She felt the need to spend some time by herself. The past weeks she'd really tried to get to know Faith and try to start a good friendship, but the dark-haired Slayer wasn't making it easy. Slaying seemed like a deathtrap waiting to happen whenever they patrolled due to Faith's uncanny ability to attract or stumble upon hoards of vampires. This of course would inevitably result in Faith becoming absorbed in the fight and the adrenaline—thus forgetting about Buffy completely. One reason that Buffy and Angel fought so well together was because they actually fought _together_, as a _team_. It was safe to say that, at least at the moment, Faith wasn't a team player.

Buffy just needed a break, to slay by herself, like old times.

Two large, stone coffins were in the center of the crypt and Buffy went to the one on the right, shoving the lid to the side so she could shine her flashlight inside. "Strike one," Buffy murmured to herself, seeing only old bones. "No amulet here."

Moving over to the next coffin, Buffy pushed the lid out of the way and illuminated the coffin with the beam of her flashlight. Buffy smirked, seeing the amulet around the decayed body's neck. "Game over," she said as she reached her hand into the coffin to grab the amulet.

A sharp, sudden noise caused Buffy to glance up swiftly, and she instantly withdrew her hand. The flickering light of many torches reflected off the walls and the low murmur of voices slowly became louder. Quickly, Buffy looked around for a hiding spot. It was too late to make a getaway. Buffy cursed mentally when she didn't see a hiding place…aside from sharing a coffin.

Buffy jumped into the first coffin she'd opened, and shut off her flashlight. The first of the intruders entered the crypt just as Buffy had situated the lid over the coffin. With a racing heartbeat, Buffy listened as the lid of the coffin that contained the amulet was shoved aside, and Buffy knew that someone else had just taken the valuable item within its depths. Damn.

Buffy remained absolutely still as the vampires moved around the crypt. She guessed that there were about six of them, and those were not very favorable odds for her. If she had Angel with her, it wouldn't be too much of a problem, but by herself? Six against one odds became a big problem.

When there was only silence in the crypt, Buffy hesitantly got out of the coffin. However, she felt a hand on her shoulder and spun, her fist cocked and ready to dish out a mean right hook. "Faith!" Buffy immediately dropped her fist and relaxed.

"What are you doing hiding in there?" Faith asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Looking for the amulet," Buffy answered as she glanced toward the door, knowing that the thieves had probably already gone. "But I wasn't expecting Special Guest Stars. Six against one," Buffy explained, gesturing to the coffin. "Hence the hiding."

Faith brightened and shrugged, "Well, it's six against two now, so let's go."

Without waiting for an answer, Faith rushed out of the crypt and Buffy had no choice but to follow. They got outside just in time to see two vampires jump down into the sewers. Buffy immediately stopped and began debating their options. Maybe they could go get Angel…

"Wait!" Buffy said suddenly, noticing that Faith had no intentions of debating what to do. She had already decided to follow. "Stop," Buffy told her. "Think."

"No, no, no," Faith shook her head defiantly as she continued to the manhole.

Once again, Buffy had no choice to follow. However, that didn't mean she was letting go of her reasoning. "It's a manhole," she tried to impart her logic to her sister Slayer. "Tight spaces, no escape—six against two odds, not unlike three against one."

"And there might be more," Faith returned casually as grabbed Buffy's arm. "So come on!"

Buffy shook her off. "You're just going to go down there? That's your plan?"

"Who said I had a plan?" Faith retorted as she came to a stop right beside the manhole. "I don't know how many are down there, but I wanna find out. I'll know when I land. If you don't come in after me…" Faith shrugged. "I might die!" she grinned before jumping down through the manhole.

Buffy sighed and followed Faith. So much for catching a break.

* * *

><p>The bathroom was warm and steamy when Angel walked in. Apparently, the shower had been on for a fairly long while. Angel frowned, "How long have you been in there?" he asked, raising his voice enough so that Buffy could hear him over the noise of the shower.<p>

Buffy pulled back the shower curtain slightly, revealing only her frustrated, annoyed face and her shampoo lathered hair. "I can't get the smell of sewer out of my hair!" she complained. "This is taking lather, rinse, and repeat to a whole new level!"

Angel couldn't help but grin at her adorable ire. "Faith?" he assumed.

Buffy just growled and disappeared behind the curtain to rinse out her hair, _again_.

Still smiling Angel quickly stripped down and got into the shower behind her, surprising Buffy when his hands slid around her waist. This was new.

Angel moved her wet hair out of the way, caressing her shoulder as he did so and placing a gentle kiss in the curve of her neck. "You need to relax," he told her with a smile.

Buffy felt her stomach flutter, and all thoughts of Faith and vampires trying to drown her fled her mind completely. Instead, they were replaced with her and Angel. In the shower. Together. Most importantly, she was thinking of all the things that they could accomplish together in the shower…

A shiver of anticipation shot down her spine, and Buffy grinned before turning in his arms, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I need to relax, huh?" she questioned as Angel nuzzled her neck. "I suppose you have a plan?"

"Oh, yeah," Angel smiled against her skin. "I have a plan."

* * *

><p>Later, Buffy was tucked into Angel's side, her head resting on his chest and his hand curled over her hip. Buffy breathed deeply, content…and definitely relaxed. "That was fun," she smiled as she caressed his stomach lightly.<p>

Angel chuckled. "I hope it was more than fun."

"Oh, it was…we should do it again," Buffy lifted her head off his chest to look at him.

Angel frowned. "Now?"

"No," Buffy shook her head, giggling. "But soon."

"Definitely," Angel agreed, praising his foresight in getting a large shower.

They laid in silence for a few more moments until Angel asked, "So, what happened tonight?" he looked to his bedside table where the amulet rested. Obviously, she and Faith had been successful.

"Six against two odds in a sewer," Buffy sighed, too relaxed and tired to get upset. "Tight spaces. No escape. So, naturally, Faith just jumped right in."

"And you had to follow," Angel nodded even though Buffy couldn't see the action.

"Exactly," Buffy replied. "I really don't like it when they try to drown me," she muttered and Angel's fingers dug into her hips for a moment before he relaxed and loosened his hold.

"I should have been there," Angel said firmly.

"Don't get all over-protective on me," Buffy ordered tiredly. "I don't have the energy to argue with you."

Angel was silent, and Buffy debated on what she was going to say next. Honestly, something was troubling her, and she didn't quite know what to do about it. "You know, even though I was pissed that Faith drug me into that situation…I still, well, liked it. I mean, it was intense. I just let go and became this force. I just didn't care anymore." Buffy paused, expecting Angel to say something, but when he remained silent, she continued. "The more time I spend with Faith...seeing how everything is so carefree and easy for her...it's tempting to be like that too, ya know?"

Angel was silent for another long moment before he spoke. "Being carefree, doing whatever you want, living by your own rules…it is tempting," he began quietly. "But, eventually, it's going to come back to haunt her. Faith's going down a destructive path—I don't want you getting sucked in."

Buffy looked up at Angel and studied his face, seeing the earnest seriousness reflected in his eyes. "Faith is trying to figure out where she stands in the world. She has no one to guide her, not that she'd necessarily trust anyone enough to help her—or even to admit that she needs help in the first place," Angel sighed and raised a hand to lightly caress Buffy's face with his fingertips. "Faith's life may seem ideal, but in the end, you've got the better end of the deal."

Buffy processed his words, nodded once, and then laid her head on his chest again. "Yeah, you're right," she admitted with a sigh. "But you know, maybe I could pretend to be irresponsible for an hour tomorrow…because I really don't want to take that chemistry test."

* * *

><p>It was with great relief that Buffy threw her bag over her shoulder and hurriedly left Mrs. Taggart's chemistry class. Willow and Xander quickly followed her and Buffy took a deep breath of fresh air when she entered the hallway and began their trek to their lockers.<p>

"I thought that went well," Willow remarked as they walked. "That one redox reaction gave me some trouble, but then when I realized that the oxygen was acting as the limiting reactant—"

"Hey, hey, whoa now," Xander held up a hand. "Let's leave the chemistry in the class room shall we? Thanks."

"So what are we doing on this fair Friday night?" Xander asked as he opened the door to his locker and tossed his books haphazardly into its depths. "I feel the need to party."

"The Dingoes are playing at the Bronze," Oz said coming up behind them and wrapping an arm around Willow.

"Sounds like fun," Buffy grinned. "Maybe I'll persuade Angel to dance…"

"I'd like to see that," Faith smirked as she appeared beside them. She looked at Buffy, "What was up with the rejection?" she asked, referring to the last hour when she'd appeared outside the classroom window and attempted to get Buffy to skip class.

"I had a test," Buffy replied as they all began to walk out the doors.

"Yeah, well, I had fun," Faith grinned. "Lots of vamps. This one had me pinned, and another was going in for the bite right? But I kicked him right in the goods, and he went down! You should have been there, B."

"I had a test," Buffy repeated with a shrug.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," Faith said dismissively. "So, what do you say for some patrolling tonight?"

"Actually, I was going to chill at the Bronze," Buffy replied with a smile. "You know, have some fun. What do you think?"

Faith considered this. Partying did sound like a good time. Maybe she'd even pick up a friend. "Sure, cool, I'm five by five."

* * *

><p>"Are you sure that's legal?" Xander asked as he sat at a table with Willow and Buffy at the Bronze.<p>

Willow and Buffy turned to the dance floor and realized what he was talking about. Faith was surrounded by a hoard of boys, all of them dancing as close to her as possible. "Eh, it's just Faith," Buffy shrugged.

"I know, but," Xander struggled to form the words, and if Buffy didn't know better it appeared as though he was jealous. "It's just, that's not dancing. That's like, um, certain nightly activities that may or may not happen with a certain person…"

"Xander," Buffy interrupted with a curious, yet confused smile. "It's Faith. Boys and Faith come and go. It's not like she's looking for a steady relationship or anything, I mean, it's Faith," Buffy grinned before she noticed something. "Why is your eye twitching every time I say Faith's name?"

"What?" Xander retorted defensively. "What are you talking about?"

Buffy leaned forward across the table, staring intently. "Faith."

Xander slapped his hand over his eye. "Stop it!"

Willow just watched the exchange confused. Something clicked in the back of her mind, but she couldn't put her finger on it. All she knew was that it made her uncomfortable. Trying to redirect the conversation, Willow looked around for a topic. Oz and the Dingoes were in the process of setting up. She watched Oz adjust the amps, and then nod to himself when they gave him the sound he wanted. With a slight smile, Willow turned back to Buffy and Xander. Seeing her significant other had caused her to note a particular someone's absence.

"Where's Angel?" she asked Buffy. "I thought he was going to be here."

"Me too," Buffy frowned as she looked towards the door.

"B!" Faith called from the dance floor. "Come on!" she waved Buffy over. "Let's have some fun!"

Buffy debated for a moment before deciding that she really _did_ want to dance. Hopping off her stool, she joined her sister Slayer on the dance floor and immediately the crowd of boys surrounding Faith enveloped Buffy too. The beat of the music was soon all Buffy heard, and her only thoughts were moving to the music. She still had the foresight not to dance with any of the boys. It was really her and Faith that were dancing together, and Buffy found herself smiling. It was nice to dance and have some fun.

Sometime later, Buffy was still dancing with Faith. Willow and Xander had joined them for a moment, but Willow had quickly returned to the table so she could properly admire Oz playing his guitar. Xander, not wanting her to sit all alone, had followed.

Angel walked under the stairs towards the edge of the dance floor, and his eyes immediately sought out Buffy. It took him a moment to find her, and he really didn't like the reason why. She was surrounded by other guys, and Angel could smell the hormones radiating off them. Even though it was clear that Buffy wasn't dancing with any of them…they were still near her, vying for her attention.

Buffy looked up then, and their eyes met. Instantly, she left the throng of people on the dance floor and made her way over to him. When she reached him, she jumped up and wrapped her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist. Angel's hands settled on her hips just as Buffy's lips met his, and he couldn't help but add a little possessive edge to the kiss, though it didn't seem like Buffy minded.

"Hmm," Buffy hummed contentedly when she pulled away. "What's with the face?" she asked, noticing that he still seemed a little tense.

"I saw you making friends," he nodded towards the dance floor and Buffy laughed. She loved it when he got jealous. It was too cute.

"Boys!" she scoffed before kissing his lips again. "I like _you_."

Angel smiled slightly. "I like you too."

"I should probably get down though," Buffy pointed out, realizing that she was still wrapped around him. Not really the most socially acceptable thing to do in public for a certain length of time.

"Yeah," Angel sighed as she hopped down, disappointed at the distance now between them.

"What's with the tardiness?" Buffy asked.

"Balthazar," Angel answered seriously now that he could think of other things that did not involve Buffy's legs around him.

"Dang," Buffy muttered. "Of course. Why do demons ruin my night?" she asked as Angel took her hand and began to lead her towards an alcove.

They settled onto a couch and Buffy sat next to him. She had debated for a moment on whether she would sit in his lap, but had decided against it. They both needed to focus. "So, what's the what?" she asked.

"Word on the street is that Balthazar is in the packing warehouse on Devereau. He's looking for the amulet," Angel informed her. He'd paid a visit to Willy and a few other contacts.

"Where's the amulet now?" Buffy asked. "Is it still at the mansion?"

Angel shook his head. "It's with me," he gestured to his inside jacket pocket.

"Having that thing with you is like walking around with a target on your back," Buffy admonished, and Angel shrugged.

"I can take care of myself."

"Ah! There you are!" Wesley made his way towards them, looking excited. "I have news!"

"Manchester United won?" Buffy raised her eyebrows, unable to forget Wesley throwing the popcorn in the air and doing a very disturbing victory dance.

"No, no, no," Wesley shook his head. "About Balthazar...I gleaned from a culmination of research and other sources that Balthazar is currently holed up in—"

"The packing warehouse on Devereau," Buffy interrupted with an indulgent smile.

Wesley pouted, and then glared at Angel. "How do you always beat me to the punch?"

Angel shrugged.

"Well, yes, Angel is correct," Wesley sat down. "I would appreciate it if you could maybe scout the place tonight?"

"Take a little look-see? Sure," Buffy sighed, glancing at Angel. "Wanna tag along?"

"Actually, I was wondering if I could speak with Angel," Wesley said and he suddenly sounded nervous.

"O-kay," Buffy shot Angel a puzzled look, but he looked just as clueless as she did. "So, I'm gonna go drag Faith off the dance floor and check out that warehouse," she said as she rose.

Angel stood to, and pulled her to him for a kiss. "Be careful," he ordered softly.

"You know me," Buffy returned with a smile.

"I mean it," Angel said seriously.

Buffy offered him a gentle smile. "I'll be careful," she promised to assuage him. "Promise."

Buffy turned away from him then and left. Angel followed her with his eyes until she and Faith had gone out the door. All this time, Wesley had been patiently waiting to speak. "Um, Angel?" he asked.

"What do you need Wes?" Angel asked, focusing on his friend. His lips quirked up in a smile seeing Wesley's nervousness, "What do you have on your mind?"

"Well," Wesley sighed before gesturing to the couch. Angel's eyebrows rose, but nonetheless he complied and sat. Wesley sat down opposite him in a chair, and leaned forward, his elbows on his knees. "This is um, quite embarrassing really," Wesley stammered and Angel could see the Watcher's blush. "But, I, uh, need some advice…"

"Okay," Angel said slowly, getting the feeling he wasn't going to like this conversation.

"I assume that you, uh," Wesley shook his head. "Well, actually, I _know_ that you have a lot of experience with, um…" Wesley paused. This was so embarrassing! A part of him still didn't believe he was actually going to have this conversation with his friend. But, Wesley supposed, this context qualified as 'guy talk', something that Buffy continuously told him was a part of life as a man.

"What?" Angel asked confused.

Wesley pulled himself together, and spit it out. "You have a lot of experience with women, correct?"

Angel didn't even have time to answer before Wesley hurried on. "I need your advice. You see, there was this woman, and I, we, well, we slept together and—"

"Whoa," Angel held up his hands. "Let's, uh, slow down a little, alright?"

"But what does it mean if she doesn't call me back?" Wesley blurted. "I've left messages, but she hasn't called me back! What does it mean? Is it some kind of code? Some signal that I'm missing? Should I seek her out? What..." Wesley trailed off as Angel got to his feet. "Where are you going?"

Angel chuckled uncomfortably. "You know, Wes, I'd love to help you," he said as he backed away. "But you know, I haven't really dated anyone except Buffy…so, you know, I'm not really the best person to ask…"

"But you've slept with hundreds of women!" Wesley pointed out and Angel sighed and rubbed his temples.

"You're lucky Buffy isn't here to hear you say that," Angel told him. "Look, okay, if she doesn't call you back, then maybe it's for the best, right?" he said quickly.

"Perhaps if you could give me some instruct—"

"Hell no," Angel interrupted. "Don't finish that sentence. If you say anything more, I _will_ kill you."

Wesley opened his mouth, but then thought better of it. "I'll go back to the library," he said awkwardly, and Angel just nodded.

"Yeah. Back to the library," he agreed, and Wesley nodded before turning to go. "Wes!" Angel called, and the Watcher turned around. "This conversation _never_ happened," he said seriously.

"Never."

* * *

><p><strong>Okay, doesn't that just bring a smile to your face! It's so cute! Of course, if you couldn't tell, that scene was inspired by the BONES scene between Zack and Booth. Which, speaking of BONES, did y'all see the Season Premiere? AHHHHHHH! It was FANTASTIC! I loved, loved, loved, loved it! <strong>

**So, my little special guest star I told you about last chapter did not appear in this chapter. I meant for him to, but it just didn't work out that way. Maybe next chapter, then? I'm excited.**

**Btw, I have a poll on my profile page if you guys wouldn't mind taking the time to take a little look-see. I'm just curious to see which of my Buffy stories is your fav! :D**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	26. Chapter 26

**A/N: Okay, we have another chapter! Gah, this one gave me some trouble. I don't know why, but it did. Grr. But at least you guys got an update this week, right? I really am trying to give you guys at least one update a week, but I can't promise any more than that right now. **

**So, on to bigger, better, and happier things! The AISHB sequel is going SO FANTASTICALLY WELL! You guys have no idea how excited I am to begin posting that story! I've got seven chapters written and it's already over 40,000 words! Yes. I know. It will be a long story because I have it outlined to be 37 chapters, I think. Ah! We'll probably get over 200,000 words! I will tell you that I rewrote a particular episode (of course I won't tell you which one :D) and boy did it go from comical to serious in a heartbeat! I shocked myself with that chapter, but it is definitely one of the best little scenes I've written.**

**And now that I've got all of you anxious for another story...let's get back to this one... :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I do not own Buffy).**

_**Me: Alrighty, guys listen up!**_

**Buffy: What?**

_**Me: You guys got to give me some emotion this chapter, m'kay?**_

**Angel: Seriously...because do you know how tiring it is to be in emotional turmoil?**

_**Me: Well, you're actually more contemplative this chapter, tis true.**_

**Buffy: What about me?**

_**Me: (laughs nervously) Um...this isn't really a good chapter for you.**_

**Angel: (eyes narrowed) What did you write?**

_**Me: (backs away slowly) Remember what you said about 'emotional turmoil'? (waves quickly) Bye!**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 26<p>

Buffy knelt beside Faith and they both looked on in disgust as what appeared to be Balthazar ordered his minions about. Buffy's nose scrunched up in distaste. "Okay, we've got ten, maybe twelve bad guys and one big demon in desperate need of a Stairmaster."

"I say we take 'em all," Faith suggested eagerly. "Hard and fast and now."

"We need more firepower," Buffy shook her head. "We should go back to the library…"

"Well, I guess Jacuzzi boy isn't going anywhere," Faith sighed disappointed. "I just wish we had…" she trailed off as her eyes settled on a sports store across the street. "Ah, that is _too_ good," she said as she began to move quickly towards the store, prompting Buffy to follow.

Faith didn't break stride and kicked in the door, causing Buffy's eyes to widen in shock; but, it was like her legs weren't listening to her brain and instead of staying outside, she followed Faith into the store. Faith looked around and then went to the archery counter. "Ah! Score," she said as she broke the glass case that contained a small crossbow and took it out.

"Faith!" Buffy protested. "We can't do this…"

"Sure we can," Faith retorted exasperated. "When are you going to get it, B? Life for a Slayer is very simple," she explained as she walked over to a glass case containing some nunchucks. "Want." She broke the glass. "Take." She stuffed the nunchucks in her pockets. "Have."

Buffy stared at her and for a moment she actually considered complying. Her eyes found the case of hunting knives that she'd seen immediately, and she actually considered breaking the glass and taking him. Want. Take. Have. It was so simple.

But then she heard Angel's voice in her head.

Buffy stepped away from the case. "Faith, put that stuff back and let's get out of here…"

"What?" Faith questioned irritated. "Come on, B—"

"Drop the weapons and get down on the ground now!" a commanding voice ordered, prompting Buffy and Faith to look up at the two police officers with their weapons drawn in the doorway.

* * *

><p>Buffy glared at the steel mesh barrier that separated her from the cops in the front seat. She couldn't believe she'd actually been arrested. Arrested! Again! Well, the last time she'd only had a warrant out for her arrest, but still! This was all Faith's fault.<p>

"What do you say we get out of here?" Faith suggested in a whisper, and if Buffy's hands weren't cuffed behind her back she would have punched the smile right off Faith's face.

Faith slouched down in her seat and positioned herself to kick in the metal barrier. Buffy hesitated. One of the officers might get hurt…

"We can't save the world in jail," Faith pointed out impatiently.

Buffy saw the truth in that and she slouched in her seat too, ready to kick the metal divider.

"One," Faith counted almost silently. "Two…"

They both kicked on the silent 'three' and the action caused the driver to swerve and crash into a parked car. Buffy was catapulted forward and hit the back of the passenger seat. She blinked dazedly and looked around, seeing steam rising from the hood of the car. She looked in the front seat and saw that both officers were unconscious.

Buffy frowned and climbed out of the car, just as Faith emerged with a set of keys. They fumbled to unlock the cuffs, but the moment they were off, Buffy immediately turned to Faith. "We should call an ambulance."

"Five people already have," Faith replied easily. "The racket we made?" she raised her eyebrows before looking back towards the officers. "They're fine."

"Come on, let's get out of here," Faith urged, knowing that more cops would eventually show up and that their arresting officers wouldn't stay unconscious forever.

Buffy didn't move.

"Come on!" Faith repeated harshly, grabbing Buffy's arm and dragging her away until she was running on her own.

* * *

><p>Buffy dragged her feet into the mansion, barely remembering to shut the door. For a moment, Buffy debated trekking up to the stairs, but she decided against it. It was much further than she wanted to go.<p>

Finding the most comfortable, impromptu bed, Buffy fell onto the couch and reached up to grab the blanket that was draped over the back. With half-lidded eyes, Buffy situated the blanket haphazardly over her, and then sighed, drifting off to sleep.

That was how Angel found Buffy—curled up in a ball on the couch with the blanket tucked around her. He knew that eventually he would get around to sketching this image, but at the moment, he was more concerned as to why she was on the couch instead of in bed.

Angel thought about waking her and asking about what had happened on her recon with Faith, but he decided against it. Obviously, she was tired and she deserved to sleep uninterrupted. With a small smile, Angel carefully scooped Buffy into his arms and carried her upstairs.

Barely jostling her at all, Angel was able to settle her in the bed and climb in beside her. As he lay there, Angel couldn't help but wonder about the future. It was odd, considering that he was much more used to wondering about the past. Things he couldn't change. Things he wished he'd done differently. Decisions he could've made and didn't.

Buffy was graduating in a few short months. Things would change. Buffy would start college, and what would he do? For the first time since being introduced to Buffy by Whistler, Angel felt the need to do something—something important—something that mattered. Meeting Buffy, helping her with her Calling…finally doing something good with his existence…it had helped him see a part of himself that he'd refused to believe. The idea that he could help people and not hurt them…it may have seemed laughable, but it was true. Centuries of horrific memories of torture and pain and malice weren't really conducive to 'happy thoughts'. For the longest time it was all he remembered, but Buffy had changed that. Creating new, happy, wonderful memories and causing him to remember a few happy memories of his own.

Helping Buffy with her Calling was the best decision he'd made in a century. Watching her fight every day, having a _purpose_…it was something that Angel admired. And for the first time in, well, ever really, Angel wanted to have a purpose. He wanted his existence to mean something. He wanted to prove to himself that he could do something good. Every day he saw Buffy helping people, saving people. Angel himself had helped her, but Slaying was her Calling, her Destiny, her Fate. Angel wanted his own Calling, his own Destiny, his own Fate.

Things were changing. He didn't know if Buffy realized it yet, maybe she had, maybe she hadn't. But, eventually (soon), they'd have to talk.

* * *

><p>"You're quiet tonight," Faith noted as she and Buffy walked down an alley, heading for the packing warehouse.<p>

"I just wanna get this done," Buffy replied, her mind on other things. Angel had been quiet today…not brooding, but reflective.

It had been driving Buffy crazy all day.

Faith, however, misinterpreted. "Yeah," she agreed. "I'm dying to test out the longbow. I think it might be my new thing."

"I can't believe you went back for that stuff," Buffy shook her head disapprovingly, but Faith paid it no mind.

"Hey, how do you feel about getting some ribs?" she asked. "You know, after we're done?"

Buffy was about to send back a snappy retort, but she was interrupted when an Eliminatus jumped in front of them, blocking their path.

The vampire lunged at the closest Slayer to him, Buffy, who easily sidestepped the attack and shoved him into a truck. The vamp quickly got to his feet and sent a kick to Buffy's midsection, but she blocked and returned a kick of her own, sending the vampire flying back into the wall.

Buffy jumped on the vamp, and they struggled for a moment before Buffy planted her knees on his chest and staked him. She looked toward Faith in case the other Slayer needed any help, but Faith had just dusted her vamp too.

"I think we've got more comin'," Faith said as Buffy joined her in the middle of the alley, both of them looking down the way.

"I don't think we'll make it to the warehouse," Buffy said as they started walking for the structure anyway.

"If they keep coming one at a time, then we've got a shot," Faith replied just as another Eliminatus jumped in front of them, lunging his sword towards Faith.

Faith's hand shot out, grabbed the vampire's arm, and then shoved him into a stack of crates. Sparing no time, Faith grabbed hold of the vampire's arm again and swung him into another stack of crates. Buffy was there in less than a second and dusted the vamp before he'd even had the chance to realize what had happened.

Sharing a quick smile, Buffy and Faith resumed their trek to the warehouse; but, not two seconds later, a hand grabbed Buffy's shoulder. Buffy reacted instinctively, and grabbed the offender's arm, throwing him into a dumpster.

Faith was quick to take out her stake and lunge toward the attacker.

"Faith! No!" Buffy cried, but it was too late.

Their attacker did not turn to dust when Faith's stake sunk into his chest. Instead, a terrible gurgling sound came from the man's shocked, parted lips. Blood seeped from his open mouth and for a moment both Slayers stood in shock and horror as they listened to the dying man's wheezing gasps for air.

Snapping out of her shock, Buffy knelt by Deputy Mayor Allan Finch, trying to staunch the bleeding that was flowing far too fast. "Don't move," she told him shakily as his blood ran over her fingers.

"I didn't—I didn't know," Faith whispered frozen. "I didn't know…"

Buffy tried to force her brain to work. "We need to call 911, now!" she told Faith.

Allan began to convulse and looked up at Buffy, his eyes terrified. "Don't move," she told him again as more blood seeped through her fingers. "I-It's gonna be okay…"

"I-I need…I need something to stop the…" Buffy stammered as panic began to overcome her as Allan convulsed again. His eyes widened and he started to mouth words, but Buffy heard no sound escape from his lips. He meagerly began to lift his arm towards Buffy, but it fell limply and he slumped against the dumpster, his eyes staring up at Buffy lifelessly.

He was dead.

_No_.

Buffy stared at the dead man in front of her in horror. No. No. No. No…

This wasn't supposed to happen. How could this have happened? She was the Slayer. She slayed demons, not _people_. She was supposed to protect people. Not _kill_ them.

This wasn't supposed to happen.

He was dead.

_Dead_.

Allan Finch was gone. They—she and Faith—had killed him. It was their fault, strictly theirs. They'd taken someone's life, a life that wasn't theirs to take.

But it was an accident...

They hadn't meant to. God, they'd never meant to. He'd come out of nowhere. They'd been on alert, they'd been jumpy.

If only she'd realized sooner. If only Buffy had been able to see him for whom he was sooner.

She felt numb.

"We gotta get out of here," Faith said urgently, panicking.

Buffy was too numb to panic. She continued to stare at the lifeless man in front of her.

"Come on!" Faith shouted, grabbing Buffy's arm and hauling her up.

That seemed to be all the urging Buffy needed. Fight or flight kicked in, and she was definitely choosing flight. She and Faith ran down the alley, faster than they'd ever run before—almost as if they thought that if they could run fast enough, they could escape what had happened.

Faith and Buffy didn't stay together though. Faith jumped up on top of some crates, while Buffy chose to continue running down the alley, hopping the fence at the end. She rounded the corner, and ran smack into Angel.

"Angel!" she gasped as she tried to catch her breath.

"Buffy, I've been looking everywhere for you," Angel replied concerned when he smelled blood. He looked down and saw Buffy's hand glistening red in the faint light of the streetlamp. "Your hand." Angel reached out to take her hand, but Buffy jerked it away from him in an uncharacteristic gesture that caused Angel to frown.

"It's okay," Buffy replied quickly, and for a moment Angel let the subject drop.

"I've just been to the warehouse," he told her. "I was waiting for you." Angel couldn't help but add that little detail to watch for Buffy's reaction. She flinched ever so slightly, and Angel's gut clenched. What had happened? But whatever it was, it would have to be put on hold. "They got Giles and Wes."

Buffy's face paled. Worry washed through her as Allan Finch was pushed from her mind. Giles and Wes. She couldn't lose them. They couldn't die. They couldn't die. She could save them. She could get there in time.

She could save _them_.

"Come on." Buffy bolted toward the warehouse and Angel followed right on her heels.

When they reached the warehouse, they could easily hear Balthazar screaming. They knelt by a window and looked inside. Giles and Wes' hands were bound behind their backs, and Buffy could see Wes' knees shaking.

"THERE IS ONE DEAL!" Balthazar shouted at them. Apparently, Giles had been trying to reason with him, or buy some time. "YOU WILL DIE QUICKLY, OR YOU WILL DIE SLOWLY! THE MAN WHO HAS MY AMULET! WHAT IS HIS NAME?"

Buffy looked to her right to tell Angel that they had to get in there, but he was already gone. Quickly, Buffy followed him through the door and jumped into the fight that Angel had already started. He'd already thrown two Eliminati into the wall and he'd head butted a third.

Buffy backhanded a vamp to her right and then punched another to her left. The vampire on her right raised his sword to slash her, but Buffy grabbed his arm and brought it down as she kneed him in the gut, causing the sword to fall from his grasp. But before it clattered to the ground, Buffy caught it.

Giles, who had been watching the entire fight, turned his tied hands towards his Slayer, and Buffy swung the sword in a high arc and neatly severed the ropes that bound her Watcher's wrists. Once he was free, Giles quickly grabbed Wesley and moved him out of harm's way.

The fight continued on for a few more minutes. All the while, Balthazar spluttered and stammered his discontent. "Unacceptable!" he repeated over and over and over.

No one paid attention to anything other than the fight…with the exception of Wesley.

After almost having his head taken off, Wesley had backed away from the fight—figuring that it was best for both parties. He'd faced a few vampires at the academy but under controlled circumstances. It was safe to say that these were _not_ controlled circumstances. He'd have to get Angel to help him learn to fight because otherwise he was just about useless in a situation such as this.

Instead of focusing on his less than stellar fighting skills, Wesley watched the abilities of those around him. He was surprised to find that Giles appeared to be in top form. It was obvious that he was very comfortable using a sword, knowledgeable. Although, Wesley supposed that he shouldn't be surprised. After all, Giles would've had to have the skill in order to teach Buffy.

Wesley watched Buffy fight next. She really was spry. Quick. Efficient. Clean. There was such strength and confidence in her moves that it left Wesley amazed. The grace with which she fought was astounding and Wesley wondered how much of this was Giles training and Buffy's natural ability.

Wesley's attention moved towards Angel, and there it stayed. Wesley had read enough about Angelus to know that Angel was considered to be one of the best fighters in the demon world—and Wesley sure believed it now. The power and sheer strength that Angel fought with was mind blowing. Sometimes his moves were lightening quick. Other times it was slower and more fluid. Wesley knew that Angel was using different styles, but he was moving far too fast for Wesley to figure out which ones specifically.

Wesley watched as Angel took a kick to the face, but it didn't even cause Angel to flinch. He blocked a punch from the vampire, and then grabbed his arm and threw him into the wall. That was the second vampire Wesley had seen meet the same fate. The fourth if he counted the two unfortunate souls when Angel had made his rather dramatic, timely entrance.

Suddenly, the air between Balthazar and Angel became disturbed, and Wesley looked towards Balthazar to see that the demon's arms were outstretched towards the vampire.

Buffy looked up when the sounds of the fight dwindled. Her eyes widened in horror when she saw Angel on his back against the edge of Balthazar's pool. Balthazar's hands clutched his head tightly, and Angel couldn't get free, even with all his strength.

Panic laced through her so sharply that it took Buffy's breath away. She couldn't lose Angel. Angel couldn't die. He couldn't die. She wouldn't be responsible for _his_ death. He couldn't die—not like Allan Finch. She _would_ save Angel.

Buffy looked around her quickly, looking for anything that could help her. Her eyes landed on an electrical cable that held a lamp directly over Balthazar. Buffy grabbed the cord and yanked it hard, causing the lamp to fall and break in the pool.

Sparks shot out and the water steamed as Balthazar screamed in agony as he was electrocuted.

Buffy didn't waste time in running over to Angel who had staggered away from the pool. Instantly, Buffy's arms were around him, and she held him tightly, not ever wanting to let go. He hugged her back, and Buffy relished the feel of his arms around her. He was alive and she felt safe in his arms, protected from the world and the horrors in it.

Suddenly, Balthazar spoke, startling Buffy because she'd assumed he was dead.

"Slayer! You think you've won." He chuckled and wheezed as he fought off death for a few seconds longer. "When he rises…you'll wish I'd killed you all."

* * *

><p>The walk back to the mansion was silent.<p>

Buffy and Angel walked side by side, each of them consumed in their own thoughts.

Buffy walked with her arms wrapped around her waist, trying to consol herself as she replayed Allan Finch's death in her mind. His eyes had been the worst. She'd never seen anyone's eyes contain such terror. Poor Allan Finch had been terrified of death. He'd known he was dying, and Buffy had known too, but she'd refused to believe it. After all, Slayers didn't kill humans. They protected humans.

What had they done? And where was Faith?

Angel was trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together, but sadly he had very little to go on. He only knew that the blood on Buffy's hands was not hers, and that was not a good thing. It meant that something had happened, and by Buffy's silence Angel knew it wasn't good—at all.

The silence continued between them as they entered the mansion and went upstairs to their room. Buffy immediately went to the bathroom and the shower was turned on within a minute of her closing the door. However, when thirty minutes had passed and Buffy still hadn't come out of the shower, Angel began to worry. He knocked on the door, but Buffy didn't answer.

Angel jiggled the doorknob, but it was locked. Now he was definitely worried.

"Buffy?" he called through the door. "Buffy, open the door!"

When Buffy still didn't answer, Angel threw his shoulder into the door, breaking the lock. Steam swathed the room in a dense, foggy, heat and Angel had to blink because it was almost as if he had water in his eyes.

"Buffy?" Angel called again pulling back the curtain slightly.

What he saw nearly broke his heart. Buffy had scrubbed her hands raw. Tears poured down her cheeks as she continued to feebly scrub her hands. Angel stepped into the shower quickly, not giving a thought to the fact that he was fully clothed.

His white t-shirt quickly stuck to his skin, but Angel didn't pay it any mind as he stilled Buffy hands and took the sponge from her. Buffy clutched his forearms as she continued to cry. "I-I look down at m-my hands and—and all I-I s-see is the blood," she managed in between sobs. "H-he came o-out of nowhere, Angel, and I—I didn't—didn't realize until it was…" Buffy shuddered and Angel pulled her to his chest. "It was t-too late. Faith had already—she'd," Buffy shook her head. "She'd already stabbed him…"

"I-It was an, an accident," she pleaded with him, like she thought he wouldn't believe her.

Angel's mind was spinning, but he would think about all this later. Right now, Buffy was all that mattered. "I know," he assured her. He turned off the water, and helped her out of the shower, wrapping a towel around her. "It was just an accident," he told her and Buffy nodded against his chest.

"Just an accident," Buffy whispered. "We—we didn't mean to…"

"I know," Angel replied as he gently dried her hair with the towel. He grabbed one of his shirts that she'd commandeered and slipped it over her shoulders. Numbly, Buffy stuck her arms through the sleeves and Angel buttoned it for her.

"Go to bed," he told her gently. "I'll be there in a minute."

Buffy nodded and shuffled out of the bathroom. Angel quickly got rid of his wet clothes and climbed into the shower. He was out and dressed in his favorite sweatpants in a little more than five minutes. Angel slid into the bed and Buffy was on him and kissing his neck before he could blink.

"Buffy." Angel gently moved her off on him. "No."

Tears sprung to Buffy's eyes. "Please," she begged before sealing her lips to his.

Once again Angel pulled back. "No."

"Make me forget," Buffy pleaded as tears slid slowly down her cheeks. "Why won't you make me forget?"

Angel debated giving in. The temptation to take her pain away for only a moment was nearly overwhelming, but he knew that it wouldn't do Buffy any good in the end. "I want to," he told her honestly as he caressed her cheek with his thumb, brushing away a tear. "But it won't change anything."

Buffy nodded, defeated and Angel pulled her into his arms. Buffy laid there until she'd stopped crying and then she was silent until she could speak. "Sorry."

"For what?" Angel asked softly.

"For attacking you," Buffy clarified.

"You did take me by surprise."

"That was the plan."

"I wish I could make it go away, Buffy," Angel whispered as he held her tighter. "I really do."

"I know," Buffy snuffled. "I just—he came out of nowhere," she repeated. "And Faith, she didn't realize he was human. I didn't either until it was too late." Buffy looked up at Angel. "We killed someone."

"It was an accident," Angel replied soothingly.

"I know, but—I should have realized who he was, right?" Buffy began. "I mean, I'm a slayer. I know the difference between a human and a vampire. I should have known. It doesn't matter that we kept getting jumped by the Eliminati. I still should have—I should have realized…"

"It's not your fault," Angel consoled her as he rubbed her back.

"I don't even know where Faith is," Buffy continued. "She went one way and I ran into you…"

"You can talk to her tomorrow." Angel kissed her hair. On the outside he was completely calm, but on the inside his mind was racing. Faith had mistaken a human for a vampire and staked him. Buffy felt incredibly guilty and Faith was M.I.A. Angel was debating the best course of action when Buffy spoke up quietly.

"There was so much blood," she whispered. "I tried to stop it, but it kept—it kept running over my fingers no matter how hard I pressed. And his, his eyes were so scared. He—he kept looking at me…he didn't want to die. I tried to—I tried to save him, Angel." Buffy blinked back more tears. "I really did try."

Angel's heart clinched and he closed his eyes briefly as he kissed her temple. "I know."

* * *

><p><strong>Aw, poor Buffy. It always kinda ticked me off that in canon we didn't really see Buffy breakdown and really think about what she and Faith had done. She was so quiet, and then she did have her crying session with Willow, but I always thought that there should have been more to it. I mean, a man died right in front of her. I wanted more trauma! So...I made it so...<strong>

**And I know that I said Doyle would be in this chapter, but alas, once again I wrote more than planned. BUT never fear my doves becuase the next chapter begins with Angel and Doyle! :D**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	27. Chapter 27

**A/N: Sorry! Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry! I know that this is egregiously late. I know, I know. I tried to get it done as quickly as I could, but life is being so irritably unreasonable. Two weeks is the longest I've ever gone without updating and that's including ending a story and starting a new one. Ugh...life. It's been all I can do to remember to breathe lately. Why I decided to have a social life, be involved in the community, take 3 AP classes, and all the other stuff that seems to occupy my time during senior year completely escapes me.**

**But! Never fear, for I am _making_ time to write. Though, admittedly, I'm working more on the AISHB sequel more than this story currently. For some reason, I got stuck writing this chapter and so I went to work on the sequel just to keep the creative juices flowing and I ended up writing two chapters of the sequel. So...I finally came back to the this story and finished this chapter. Yay! I feel so accomplished.**

**Soooo...ready for some Doyle? :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Hi!**_

**Angel: Where have you been?**

_**Me: Aw, miss me?**_

**Angel: (pauses as he looks as Buffy's glare) Uh...no. Not at all.**

**Buffy: See? He didn't miss you. **

_**Me: (grumbles) Well you don't have to look so happy about it. I can make you miserable with just a few strokes on my keyboard!**_

**Buffy: (scoffs) Ooo, I'm trembling.**

_**Me: Watch it, Blondie.**_

**Doyle: Hey, would ya stop fightin' over him already? **

**Angel: They're fighting over me? Why?**

**Doyle: Have you looked in the mirror lately? (sees Angel's glare) Ah, I suppose not.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 27<p>

When Angel woke up, Buffy was gone.

The sheets on her side of the bed were cold, leading him to deduce that she'd been gone for a while. Angel sighed and rubbed his temples wearily. Glancing at the clock, he noted that it was the time that Buffy usually got up to go to school.

Angel got out of bed and snagged a shirt on the way out of his room. He fastened the buttons as he went downstairs to the kitchen where his eyes immediately sought the refridgerator door to see if Buffy had left a note. He frowned when he saw that the surface was bare. Angel wondered whether or not he would swing by the school sometime during the day to see if she was alright.

Suddenly, Angel's senses caught up to him. He looked over his shoulder and saw a seemingly average, albeit wiry, young man sitting on the barstool in front of the island. There was a piece of paper in his hands.

"She left early to run by Faith's place," the man told him in an Irish accent that Angel noticed immediately. Oddly enough, just hearing the accent was somewhat comforting since Angel had lost his own accent so long ago. Hints of it would intrude in his speech every once in a while if he was ever really upset but otherwise he rarely heard the lilting tone.

Angel refocused on the man as he looked pointedly around. "I like the place," the stranger said approvingly. "It's kinda like Wayne Manor, which would make you batman."

"Who are you?" Angel asked his eyes narrowed in suspicion.

The man began to play with a deck of cards in his hands, shuffling them absently. "Doyle."

"You don't smell human."

"Now that's a bit rude," Doyle sniffed. "So happens that I'm very much human." Suddenly, Doyle sneezed violently, causing blue spikes to pop out of his face. Doyle shook his head and the spikes went away. "On my mother's side," he added almost as an afterthought.

"What do you want?" Angel asked warily.

"I've been sent," Doyle explained. "By the Powers That Be."

Angel froze and kept his face blank. Memories flooded through him.

"…_I've been translating the Scrolls of Aberjian…"_

"…_there's a prophecy about a vampire with a soul—"_

"_Angel. It's about Angel…"_

"…_once he fulfills his destiny, will become human. It's his reward."_

If Angel were completely honest, he'd tried to forget—key word being _tried_. Once again, he looked at Doyle, who was staring off in no particular direction, his eyes occasionally roving around the room. He was completely nonchalant, and totally unafraid that Angel might decide to snap his neck. Angel was almost insulted, but his curious (yet cautious) side got the better of him.

Time to see exactly how much Doyle knew. "The Powers That Be what?"

Doyle's lips quirked up in an amused smile, like he knew what Angel was doing. "Let me tell you a little bedtime story."

Angel almost snorted. "But I'm not sleepy."

Doyle's little half-smile morphed into a full-blown, confident smirk. "Once upon a time there was a vampire, and he was the meanest vampire in all the land. All the other vampires were afraid of him, he was such a bastard. Then one day he's cursed—by gypsies. They restore his human soul, and all of a sudden he's mad with guilt. You know, 'what have I done?' He freaked."

Angel's eyes had narrowed once again, and his entire body was rigid. A slow anger began to build within him, but he was able to beat it down—for the moment. He went over what Doyle had said. It was nothing he couldn't learn from a book.

"Okay," he said casually, forcing himself to loosen up. Angel walked out of the kitchen and plopped down on the couch. "Now I'm sleepy."

This didn't seem to deter Doyle, who followed him and perched himself in the armchair that Buffy would often curl up in to read. "Yeah, well it's a fairly dull tale," Doyle admitted. He liked Angel. Broody. Badass. But kinda happy at the same time. Doyle wondered how his next statement would affect the vampire, considering how he felt about the subject.

"Yep, fairly dull tale," Doyle repeated as he watched Angel closely to measure the vampire's reaction to his next words. "Needs a little sex is my feeling."

A low growl began to build in Angel's throat, but Doyle paid it no mind. That was a reaction (one of the many) that Doyle had considered.

Fearlessly, he continued to stomp on what he knew was a very sore subject. "So sure enough: enter the girl. Pretty little blonde thing," he whistled appreciatively, just to see Angel's reaction. The vampire's eyes darkened in anger. "Vampire Slayer by trade, and our vampire falls madly in love with her. Eventually, the two of them—well, they get fleshy with each other." Waves of silent anger flowed off Angel in torrents, but Doyle continued. "Well, I guess the technical term is perfect happiness," Doyle said knowingly. "But when our boy gets there, he goes bad again. He kills again. It's ugly."

"But," Doyle smiled. "When he gets his soul back for the second time around, things are wee bit different. It's permanent and the vampire and his Slayer make up and have lots and lots of—"

Angel growled sharply, so Doyle didn't finish the thought, instead moving on in the story.

"So, after a while and a little bit of drama, things sorta get back to how they used to be," Doyle told him. "Helping the Slayer, and doing some good. But the vampire began to wonder. He began to wonder about his own purpose. He wants to atone for his crimes."

Through the haze of anger that Doyle's casual reference to Buffy had ignited within Angel, the vampire realized that Doyle knew everything—even his most recent thoughts about destiny and fate. Still…

"Say, you wouldn't happen to have any beer around here, would you?" Doyle asked suddenly.

"No."

Doyle frowned. "And they told me you were Irish," he grumbled under his breath.

"Okay, so you know the story of my life. I lived it. It's nothing I already don't know," Angel said, ignoring the muttered comment from Doyle. The truth was that Angel really didn't have any beer…but he _did_ have a good bottle of Jameson that he wasn't planning on sharing. "Why aren't I kicking you out?"

"Because I'm not done with the story," Doyle told him with a smile. "You see, this vampire leaves his Slayer for his own destiny. He goes to L.A. To fight evil—to atone for his crimes—he's a shadow. A faceless champion for the hapless human race…"

"I'm not leaving Buffy," Angel said sharply.

"Not like 'leave' as in leave the best thing in your life for a completely stupid reason like protecting her from yourself," Doyle was quick to assure him. "You're just gonna have to try your hand at long-distance, mate."

"I want to know who sent you," Angel said as he rose from the couch to stand in front of the fireplace.

"I'm honestly not sure. They don't speak to me direct," Doyle explained with a long-suffering, over exaggerated sigh. "I get visions. Which is to say great splitting migraines that come with pictures," he couldn't help but add grumpily. "A name, a face." Doyle shrugged. "I don't know who sends them. I just know that whoever sends them is more powerful than me or you, and they're just trying to make things right."

Angel finally asked the question that had been grating on his nerves since he'd first learned of the prophecy. "But why me?"

"Because you've got potential." Doyle looked him knowingly. "And the balance sheet isn't exactly in your favor."

Angel didn't like that answer. "Well, why you?"

Doyle merely shrugged off the question. That was for a later time. "We all got something to atone for."

"Why are you here now?" Angel asked, knowing and yet not wanting to voice the answer.

"I thought that'd be rather obvious," Doyle frowned. "You know, for a guy who's lived for as long as you, you'd think you'd be just a _little_ brighter."

Angel glared.

"You're 'bout to leave," Doyle confirmed what Angel already knew. "Not yet, of course. We've still got to break it to Buffy."

"We?"

"Well, yeah. Aren't you going to introduce me?"

"Wasn't planning on it."

Doyle sighed and looked around. "Are you sure you don't have any beer?"

Angel's eyes narrowed. "No."

"See, now I _know_ you're lying," Doyle shook his head. "We're supposed to be building a beautiful friendship."

Angel scoffed and moved towards the weapon's cabinet, taking out a broadsword that he'd meant to sharpen yesterday. Doyle, however, wasn't quite as at ease anymore—especially when Angel came towards him, sword in hand.

Angel noticed Doyle's slightly worried look and smirked. He casually passed Doyle and sat back on the couch, and then proceeded to sharpen the sword in slow, methodical strokes.

"So," Doyle said casually as a little wave of relief washed through him. He always figured that getting run through wouldn't be that much fun. "You hear about the Deputy Mayor?"

Angel looked up sharply and fixed Doyle with an icy glare. "What do you know about that?"

"Just that the cops were out looking around. Couple of blokes fished him out of the river." Doyle looked at Angel appraisingly. "Why?"

Angel had meant to run by the crime scene before the cops had gotten there, but he hadn't counted on them learning of Finch's death so soon. After all, it _was_ Sunnydale.

Angel put the sword down and grabbed Doyle by the arm. "Hey!" Doyle complained.

"Let's go." Angel continued to drag Doyle behind him.

"But I'm just the messenger!" the Seer continued.

"Yeah, well, I don't want you tearing up the place looking for my booze," Angel replied honestly.

Doyle's eyes lit up. "I knew you were lying!"

* * *

><p>Buffy sat at in the library at the table, praying that her nervousness didn't show on her face. Faith sat in the chair to her left, and looked completely at ease, which only made Buffy more nervous.<p>

Early that morning Buffy had left the mansion in order to find Faith. She hadn't been able to sleep very long, even though she'd been wrapped in Angel's protective arms. Buffy had gone to Faith's motel room where she'd learned what had happened. While she'd been pouring her heart out to Angel, Faith had been taking care of things.

She'd dumped Allan Finch's body.

She didn't care about his death.

_I don't care. _

That's what Faith had said. Those exact words. Three words that had never carried so much weight—_I don't care. _It played like a loop in Buffy's mind.

What made her nearly want to throw up was the fact that Finch's body had been found and that Wesley wanted them to investigate. Buffy tried to argue that it was a police matter, but Wesley was being stubborn. What was even worse was that Faith was going along with it like it was nothing.

"It's no big, B." Faith shrugged nonchalantly. "We'll get into it if he wants."

"Buffy's right," Giles argued and Buffy thought that maybe things would end up going her way if Giles was on her side. "The Deputy Mayor's murder was a result of human malice. There's nothing supernatural about it."

"We don't know that for certain," Wesley returned. He quite liked this 'investigating' process. Perhaps he should have considered a career as a private investigator. Wesley thought he'd be pretty good at it. "I say it merits looking into."

"Which I'm sure the police are doing," Giles shot back as irritation colored his tone. "In the meantime, I say that there are better uses of the Slayer's time."

Wesley was about to say something, but Cordelia swept into the library. When he'd first arrived in Sunnydale, he'd admittedly had a slight infatuation with the young woman. However, he'd quickly gotten over it after they'd kissed the first time, not a month after his arrival. They'd been awkwardly cordial ever since.

"Don't let me interrupt," Cordelia said before she looked around and changed her mind. "Actually. Let me. I'm in a hurry."

"What do you need?" Giles asked as he resituated his glasses on his nose.

Cordelia made a face. "Psych. Freud and Jung. Book me?"

"Happily."

Wesley cleared his throat awkwardly. "Cordelia," he greeted politely.

"British Boy," Cordelia returned.

That was all of the conversation.

"Ah, here you go," Giles said as he returned from behind the stacks. He stamped the books and then gave them to Cordelia who glanced at Wes, who in turn gave her an awkward half-smile before looking away quickly. Cordelia took her books and avoided Giles: The Next Generation.

Instead, she smiled at the original Giles. "Thanks."

"So, ahem," Wesley cleared his throat again as Cordelia left the library. "Where were we?"

"Uh, done." Buffy got up from the table. "Right?"

"Uh, yep." Faith rose from her seat too. "Out to patrol. So we'll see ya."

"One moment," Wesley stopped them before they'd taken a step from the table. "I'm resolved on this," he told them referring to Allan Finch. "Natural or super I want to know."

Buffy nodded and Faith hardly showed a reaction at all except a nonchalance that was quickly growing on Buffy's frayed nerves. "Fine by me. Always ready to kick a little bad guy butt…"

Buffy followed Faith out into the hallway, when suddenly Faith grabbed her arm and pulled her into the nearest unused classroom. The door slammed shut behind her, and Buffy couldn't help but jump as Faith rounded on her.

"So you gonna rat me out? Is that it?" Faith accused challengingly.

Buffy eyes were imploring. She just wanted to do the right thing. "Faith, we have to tell. I can't keep lying. I can't pretend to investigate this! I can't pretend that I don't know!"

"Oh, I see," Faith sneered. "You can't take the fall, but I can? You just want to protect yourself."

"I'm _trying_ to protect _you_," Buffy argued sincerely. "Look, if—if we don't do the right thing, it's only going to make things worse for you."

Faith couldn't believe this. Buffy just wanted to save her own skin. Of course. She was the angel. She could do no wrong. She was Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Faith wondered if she should just give up and kiss the ground at Buffy's feet. Barely able to hold back a snort of derision, Faith focused back on the task at hand.

"Worse than jail for the rest of my young life?" Faith snorted. She wasn't the type to be cooped up. "No way!"

"Faith," Buffy tried to reason. "What we did was…"

"Yeah," Faith jumped at the opening to shared blame that Buffy had offered unwittingly. In the back of her mind, Faith knew she was terrified of what had happened. What _she _had done. Horrified with herself, but refusing to acknowledge it, she shoved Allan Finch's death so far back in her mind that she didn't even give it much thought. It had happened. No way to change it. Why worry?

"You were right there beside me when this thing went down," Faith reminded Buffy ominously. "Anything I have to answer for, you do too. You're a part of this, B. All the way."

Faith took in Buffy's shocked face, satisfied that her words had the desired effect. All the guilt didn't belong to herself. It was Buffy's fault too because if the blame _wasn't_ shared then it was all _Faith's_ fault. It _wasn't_ all her fault. No, Faith thought. It wasn't all her fault.

It _couldn't_ be.

* * *

><p>Buffy walked into the mansion with only one thought in mind—she needed to talk to Angel.<p>

Tomorrow night she and Faith were supposed to break into Allan Finch's office and snoop around. Faith was still acting like she was completely okay. How? Buffy didn't understand it. How could she just gloss over the fact that she'd killed someone? That she'd ended someone's life? Even if it had been a mistake? Buffy felt sick to her stomach anytime she thought about it. Allan Finch's terrified eyes as he looked up at her, silently pleaded for her to save him. His blood running over her fingers far too fast. Knowing that he was going to die and being completely unable to do anything about it…

Buffy shivered.

Tossing her backpack in the corner by the door, Buffy made her way to the main room where she met a shocking sight.

Angel was sitting on the couch and was wearing a goofy smile. He was laughing at something that his friend had said. Well, Buffy assumed he was a friend. Buffy studied the stranger. He was lanky, with short black hair. Didn't seem too threatening, especially since he was singing raucously what Buffy thought must be an Irish folksong. Buffy also noticed the shot glass that he held in his hand and the close to empty bottle of Jameson on the table.

Neither of the men noticed her.

"She's a really, really pretty girl," Angel said with a wide smile, chuckling a bit. "No, she's—she's a hottie girl. She has—she has—I mean—her hair is…ya know…"

"Silky honey golden tresses," the little Irishman replied. "Yeah—she's, she's pretty…it almost made the migraine of the, the vision worth it…"

Angel's eyes narrowed slightly, looking slightly more sober. "Buffy's mine," he said possessively.

"I'll drink to that," the Irishman returned as he sloppily poured them both another drink. They went to clink glasses, but they missed, causing them both to laugh.

Buffy couldn't believe her eyes. Angel was drunk…_really_ drunk.

Doyle looked up and noticed her presence just as Buffy was about to try and get Angel's attention. "Buffy!" he smiled broadly. "Look," he tried to get Angel's attention. "It's Buff—"

Suddenly, Doyle was seized by a violent sneeze. Blue spikes popped out of his face, and Buffy's eyes widened.

After overcoming a second of shock, Buffy whipped out her stake in a lightning fast move. However, just as fast, Angel had jumped off the couch and steadied her wrist. Momentarily distracted, Buffy looked up at him incredulously. "I didn't know drunk people moved so fast."

Angel chuckled, but it was slurred. "I can hold my alcohol," he said with pride, before he frowned and swayed slightly. "But…I think… I need to…lie down…" he said as he slumped against Buffy. "Just don't kill Doyle."

Unable to fight a grin, Buffy settled Angel back on the couch. This comedic situation was a welcome relief to the past thirty-six hours. She turned to move over to Doyle, but Angel reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling her down on the couch with him. "Don't leave," he whined.

"Okay," Buffy couldn't stop smiling. Angel looked so carefree and young that it made her heart swell. Buffy glanced back at the table and the almost empty bottle of Jameson. "When was the last time you drank so much?"

Angel's brows furrowed and he tried to force his mind to work. He'd drunk this much often over the course of his existence; mostly in his human years and his time as Angelus and then shortly after getting his soul. "Uh…prohibition?"

Buffy smirked. "That must have been a terrible time for you."

Angel merely nodded.

"Heeelllloooo!" Doyle waved his hands to get Buffy's attention. "Hey, I know I'm not as nice to look at as Batman over there, but I'd like to introduce meself!"

"Batman?" Buffy raised her eyebrows.

Doyle looked at her as if she was being dense. "Oh, come on, Blondie," he gestured grandly around the room. "Look at this place! It—it's like…Wayne Manor. With its—its stone and ceilings and….stone…" he trailed off as his eyelids fluttered. "You know," he said sleepily. "I think I'm gonna pass out now."

"You do that," Angel muttered.

Doyle forced his eyes open to glare at Angel. "I thought we'd bonded over our good friend here," he clasped the bottle in his hand tightly.

Angel sobered up slightly. "You drank all my booze," he accused. It was like he'd never realized it until now.

"You helped!"

"You owe me a bottle."

"Do not."

"Do too."

"Do not!"

"Do—"

"Go to sleep Doyle," Buffy interrupted as she clamped a hand over Angel's mouth to stop the childish bickering between the two.

"Ha," Doyle grinned and waggled his eyebrows at Angel. "See that? She chose me over you."

Angel started to get up, but Buffy placed a firm hand on his chest, keeping him where he was. She turned back to Doyle to correct him, but the Irishman had already fallen asleep, his head having fallen forward against the coffee table.

Buffy looked back at Angel has his arm snaked around her waist, pulling her to down so she was lying on his chest. "Hi," he smiled.

"How drunk are you?" Buffy asked him with narrowed eyes.

Angel thought about it for a moment. "I could still hold my own in a fight."

"But you were leaning on me just a second ago," Buffy argued.

"What if I just wanted to feel you against me?" Angel countered before capturing her lips.

Buffy pulled back after a moment and laughed slightly, shaking her head. "You're funny."

"I keep telling you that."

Sighing, Buffy placed her head back on his chest, and fiddled with a button on his shirt. "I'm worried about Faith," she told him anxiously. "It's like she's in denial or something. She told me she didn't care that he was dead…and I can't tell if it's the truth or not."

Angel rubbed her back soothingly, the haze of the alcohol fading. Being a vampire had a few perks. His kind was not nearly as susceptible to the effects of alcohol, which was why they always drank a whole lot when they chose to drink.

"I told Giles the truth," he admitted. After going to the crime scene earlier that day with Doyle and seeing the progress of the investigation, which included an overheard conversation between a detective and a witness who gave Faith and Buffy's descriptions, Angel had immediately gone to Giles. He'd run by the school just after Buffy and Faith had left the library. After discussing the situation, they'd all agreed to handle it themselves. None of them wanted to involve the Council. "Wes too."

"What?" Buffy jumped off the couch to glare at him, but there was no anger in her gaze, only panic. "Why? You shouldn't have—"

"They needed to know," Angel told her calmly. "You know you wanted to tell Giles."

"Well, yeah, but Faith—"

"Didn't want you to and you felt torn," Angel surmised easily. "I made it easy. Now, you didn't rat out Faith."

"But you did."

Angel shrugged. "I wasn't going to let you take the fall. It wasn't your mistake."

Buffy was quiet for a long moment. "What did they say?"

"It's not the first time something like this has happened," Angel relayed to her what Giles and Wesley had told him.

"What happened to the Slayer?" Buffy asked nervously.

"They were taken to London and the Council investigates," Angel told her and Buffy couldn't stop the shiver that ran through her. "They mete out punishment where its due if needed."

Buffy sighed and retook her position next to Angel on the couch. She wrapped an arm around him in buried her face in his neck. "What am I going to do?"

"You have to talk to Faith. Get her to admit what happened," he advised.

"I think I'm too close." Buffy didn't think that Faith would talk to her, not with their differing views on how to proceed. "Maybe someone else."

"I could talk to her," Angel offered. This was one of the options that he, Giles, and Wesley had talked about. Giles had suggested a group meeting, but Angel had nixed the idea. It would only make Faith more defensive. "I know a few things about denial."

"You'd do that?" Buffy asked, lifting her head to look at him. "You'd talk to her?"

"She needs help," Angel said seriously. "And I think I'm the only one that can."

Buffy studied him for a moment before nodding and with a sigh she looked over at Doyle. "Are we really going to leave him like that?"

Angel looked over at his new friend. Well, Angel guessed they were friends. He was really out of practice with these things. He wasn't good with people. But, as Doyle had pointed out, they had shared a drink—more than one. That was a thing friends did, right? So, if he were being a friend, he should probably at least get Doyle settled on the couch, but Angel didn't really want to move…

"Yeah, we're leaving him like that."

* * *

><p><strong>Okay, I just want to set some things straight in case any of you are wondering.<strong>

**Yes, Angel will tell Buffy about the convo he had with Giles and Wes after she and Faith had left. I don't want to make it seem as if Angel is falling back into old habits and doing things without talking to Buffy just because he thinks that he's saving her some trouble or emotional turmoil. And no, Wesley and Giles don't know about Doyle yet. They get to meet him next chapter! :D**

**So, now that that's cleared up...what do you think of Doyle in Sunnydale? I don't know about you guys, but I like his addition to the crew! And Wesley just so happened to have a particuarly important errant thought about being a private investigator? Hmm...looks like I've got a plan brewing! :D**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**

**P.S. Please remember that I can't update regularly at this time. I'll get out the next chapter when I can. Thanks for your patience. :)**


	28. Chapter 28

**A/N: Hi! Remember me? I know, I know...it's been a while. Sorry! My teachers like to crack down at the end of the semester apparently. No fun! But, alas, I am done with this semester and am on break! Yay! Freedom! You know what this means, right? Yes! More updates! I wouldn't expect them every other day, but at least twice a week. I really want to finish this story over break and start posting the AISHB sequel too! So, lots to read for you and lots to write for me! Everyone should be happy, right? :D**

**Soooo...let's get on with it!**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: I'm back! And on break!**_

**Buffy: 'Bout time! I was feeling neglected!**

_**Me: I never knew you were so high maintence! (looks at Angel) You should watch out for that.**_

**Buffy: (eyes narrowed) Hey, watch it! (grabs Angel's arm) He's mine!**

_**Me: Oh, so that's how it's gonna be? (grabs Angel's other arm) Bring it on, Blondie!**_

**Buffy: (yanks Angel's arm, pulling him toward her) Don't call me Blondie!**

_**Me: (pulls Angel towards me) Whatcha gonna do?...Blondie...**_

**Buffy: Alright, that's it! (leaps at me)**

_**Me: Ahhhhhhhh! Flee!**_

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 28<p>

Buffy was frowning as she and Faith made her way out of the Mayor's office. It wasn't looking very good. Apparently, the Mayor was mixed up in some dirty deeds. That was something that had caught Buffy by surprise. She hadn't gotten the 'bad guy' vibe from him.

Her mind brought forth snippets of conversation between herself and Faith while they'd searched through Allan Finch's remarkably spotless and markedly empty office. For a moment Faith had let her guard down, and Buffy could see how Allan Finch's death was torturing Faith. Buffy knew she wasn't the only one who probably had nightmares…

However, just as quickly as the remorse had shone through, it been replaced by a cynical callousness that had made Buffy flinch. Faith wasn't allowing herself to feel. She was in denial, and it was getting out of control. Faith needed to talk about what had happened and soon.

Buffy hoped that Angel could talk some sense into her.

She and Angel had talked with Giles and Wesley before she'd gone out with Faith to the Deputy Mayor's office. Her Watcher's opinions had been the same, but they had varied in ways. Giles was more focused on Faith and trying to get her to accept and work through her guilt. He agreed with Angel that Faith shouldn't be confronted outright as it would only cause her to be more defensive than she already was. Giles truly wanted to help Faith, Buffy could see that, but she also knew her Watcher well enough to know whether he was hoping for the best or looking at things realistically. Buffy knew that right now, Giles was hoping that Faith could be reached…but as things were, it didn't appear to Buffy as though Giles thought it would happen.

Wesley, on the other hand, was torn at loyalties. He wholeheartedly agreed that Buffy and Angel should try to help Faith—that they should _all_ help her. However, he was fighting the niggling urge to call the Council and inform them of Faith's mistake. It seemed like only the rational thing to do, and Wesley much liked rationality. But this course of action would cause the Council to come to Sunnydale, and Wesley didn't want that, especially after the Review in London and then the fiasco that was Buffy's Cruciamentum in Sunnydale.

Buffy ached to help Faith. She wanted her dark-haired sister Slayer to see reason, to let herself feel the heart-crippling remorse that Buffy knew was being beaten down anytime it reared its head. Glancing in her periphery, Buffy scanned the young woman who walked beside her.

Faith seemed completely at ease, like nothing was wrong, like they hadn't been interrogated by police a few hours earlier for murder. She wasn't fazed. She was just there, in the moment, living it up.

Five by five.

Buffy was growing to loathe that phrase.

"So the Mayor of Sunnydale is a black hat, huh?" Faith spoke, snapping Buffy from her inner thoughts. "That's a shocker."

"Actually, yeah," Buffy agreed, as she voiced some of her thoughts. "I really didn't get the 'bad guy' vibe off him."

Faith stopped and turned to Buffy, looking exasperated. "When are you gonna learn, B? It doesn't matter what kind of vibe you get off a person. Nine times out of ten the face they're showing you isn't the real one."

Buffy's eyes lit up at Faith's statement, seeing an opening. "I guess you would know a lot about that," she replied evenly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Faith snapped defensively.

"It's just—look at you Faith!" Buffy gestured to the dark-haired girl desperately, trying to get her to accept what had happened. "Less than twenty-four hours ago, you killed a man, and now you're all zip-a-dee-doo-dah? It's not your real face and I know it!" Buffy said passionately, her eyes welling with knowing understanding and pleading with Faith to open up.

As selfish as it may have been, Buffy didn't want to share her grief and turmoil alone. Angel was there for her to comfort and support her, but he couldn't really understand. He hadn't been there. "Look," Buffy whispered. "I know what you're feeling because I'm feeling it too."

"Do you?" Faith sneered insolently. "Cause I'd like to hear this."

Buffy ignored her tone and obliged. "Dirty." It was the first word that came into her mind. "Sick, like something creepy crawled up inside you and you can't get it out. And you keep hoping that it was just some nightmare, but it wasn't. And we're going to have to figure out—"

"Is there going to be an intermission for this?" Faith interrupted before Buffy's words could really sink in. Already, the crushing feelings she was desperately suppressing were screaming beneath her skin, demanding to be felt. But Faith refused to give in. She was strong. She was alright. Nothing was wrong. It wasn't her fault.

It _wasn't_ her fault.

"We have to talk to—" Buffy began, but Faith cut her off.

"No! We're not talking to anyone okay?" Faith ordered, not knowing that three people already knew. Buffy thought about telling her, but quickly dismissed the idea. That would only make things worse. "This will all blow over in a few days," Faith continued confidently.

It _had_ to blow over in a few days.

"And if it doesn't?" Buffy challenged.

"If it doesn't…" Faith trailed off with a casual shrug. "They've got a freighter leaving the docks every few days. It ain't fancy, but it gets you gone."

Buffy couldn't believe her ears. "And that's it? You just leave? You just live with it? You just live with seeing a dead guy in your head for the rest of your life?"

"Buffy, I'm not going to _see_ anything." Faith stepped closer to Buffy, her dark eyes glowing in a fierce determination. "I missed the mark last night, and I'm sorry about it, I really am, but it happens! Anyway, how many people do you think we've saved by now? Thousands? And didn't you stop the world from ending? I'd say that puts you and me in the plus column."

"We help people!" Buffy argued, horrified at what Faith was saying. It was like she was keeping a tally going. Like it was a game. "It doesn't mean we can do whatever we want!"

"Why not?" Faith shot back, gaining momentum. This felt good, defending herself, explaining herself. It was about time Buffy woke up and saw the world for what it was. "The guy I offed was no Ghandi. We know he was mixed up in dirty dealings…"

"Maybe, but what if he was coming to us for help?"

"What if he was?" Faith shrugged off the possibility. That wasn't the point. "You're still not seeing the big picture, B. Something made us like this. We're warriors. We're built to kill."

"To kill _demons!" _Buffy practically screeched incredulously. "But it doesn't mean we get to pass judgment on people like we're better than everyone else!"

"We _are_ better!"

Buffy stared at Faith, her face blank except for the shock in her eyes. Buffy couldn't seem to get passed those three words. Her eyes searched Faith's face, trying to discern any sort of falseness.

There was none.

"That's right, _better_," Faith repeated, beginning to speak quickly, the words flowing easily from her mouth in her exhilaration at finally voicing her thoughts out loud. It made them real. "People need us to survive. In the balance, no one's gonna cry over some bystander who got caught in the crossfire."

Sadness swept through Buffy's chest, gripping it tightly. "I am."

Faith sniffed disdainfully. "Well that's your loss," she said before turning and walking away, leaving a frozen Buffy behind.

* * *

><p>Angel and Doyle sat facing each other, each of them deep in concentration. Suddenly, Angel's hand shot out and moved a pawn one space.<p>

Doyle frowned. "Why'd ya do that?"

"Why would I tell you?"

"Good point." Doyle surveyed the board. He was surrounded. His poor queen was about to bite the dust and he knew it. "Can I surrender?"

"No."

"Why not?" Doyle asked miffed. "I want to keep my lady friend alive!"

Angel's eyebrows rose. "You do realize your 'lady friend' is a chess piece, right?"

"It's the principle of the thing," Doyle argued irritably. "Is this all you do when you're waiting for Buffy? Chess?"

"I read sometimes. Maybe throw a few punches at a punching bag."

"Oh, the joy that must bring you," Doyle nodded as if this explained everything. "So…you want to get a drink?"

Angel's eyes narrowed. "You still owe me a bottle."

"I thought we'd gotten past this." Doyle sighed and shook his head. "We drank it _together_. And not to mention you left me with me head on the table for twelve hours! Do ya have any idea how long it took to get that crick out of my neck?"

Angel's lips quirked up in a smile.

"You're smiling!" Doyle cried outraged. "Smiling at my pain, some friend you are! You old, broody, big foreheaded—"

Angel growled in warning, and Doyle huffed. "Stupid, sensitive, gold-digging…" he continued to mutter under his breath.

Suddenly, Angel's hand shot out and hit Doyle over the back of the head, which prompted Doyle to gasp in pain and close his eyes. "Doyle?" Angel asked worriedly. "Doyle? I didn't mean to—"

"Shut it, will you?" Doyle hissed through clenched teeth. "Tryin' to focus here…"

Angel waited anxiously, and finally Doyle exhaled slowly and opened his eyes. "I need that drink now," he mumbled as he rubbed his temples.

"What did you see?" Angel asked quickly, placing a hand on Doyle's shoulder to steady him.

"The dark-haired Slayer," Doyle muttered. "What's-her-face…"

"Faith?"

"Yeah, her," Doyle nodded. "Ow, uh…she's gonna kill Xander…at least I think that's what she called him…"

"Where?"

"A motel room?" Doyle guessed. "Pretty dingy. Needs a little TLC."

Doyle opened his eyes and looked up at Angel. "Well, get goin'! Go on, save the day!"

Angel stared at Doyle for a moment. Was he really going to do this? Act on a vision by a person whom he'd only met a day ago? Yes. Yes, he was.

But of all the people he could save, did it _have_ to be Xander?

* * *

><p>The Plymouth screeched to a stop outside Faith's motel. Angel jumped out of the car and jogged down the hall to Faith's room, picking up a discarded baseball bat along the way. The door to Faith's room was unlocked, and Angel burst in, his eyes settling on the bed. Faith was straddling Xander's waist, her hands clinched around his throat. He already appeared to be unconscious.<p>

Faith seemed to realize that someone else was in the room and turned towards the door—just in time for the baseball bat to connect with her face. Angel caught the dark-haired Slayer before she hit the floor, and propped her up against the wall for the moment. He turned his attention to Xander, who was still unconscious.

Angel leaned over and listened for a moment. He nodded to himself, hearing Xander's shallow breaths that were slowly growing stronger. Good. Using just a little more force than was necessary, Angel slung Xander over his shoulder and carried the boy to the car. On the way, Angel may or may not have let Xander's head hit a pole.

Taking out a cell phone, Angel called Wesley to come pick Xander up and take him...somewhere. Angel didn't really care where as long as it wasn't with him. Wesley agreed, and Angel snapped the phone shut, taking a deep, unnecessary breath. Time to go get Faith. Walking back into her room, Angel picked Faith up off the floor. He was carrying her down the hallway towards the Plymouth when a white-haired lady exited her room. She eyed him critically, glancing from him to Faith's unconscious form.

Angel adopted a small smile. "She fell asleep," he explained. "She's completely knocked out."

An answering smile lit the old lady's face, as she nodding approvingly. She patted his arm. "You're a nice young man," she told him. "Like my Tom. He used to be so strong and young and handsome…" she looked at him appreciatively and Angel tried to keep a straight face. It was impossible not to crack a little smile. If only this woman knew that he was actually three times her age.

"Thank you, ma'am," Angel smiled charmingly.

"And you've got manners too," the old lady shook her head. "Well, I best be goin' now. You take care of her," she ordered sternly.

Angel's smile fell slightly, but not enough for her to notice. "I'll try."

* * *

><p>Buffy was pacing in the main room of the mansion while Doyle watched from his place on the couch. "Really, ya should probably sit down Buffy," he tried again.<p>

"No," Buffy shook her head, continuing to pace and glance at the door.

She'd gotten back to the mansion about a half hour ago. She'd rushed in, calling for Angel, only to have Doyle answer her instead. The Seer had then proceeded to tell her about his vision and how Angel had gone off to save Xander from Faith. Buffy had immediately started towards the door to follow, but Doyle had convinced her to stay.

"Why are you here?" Buffy asked him as a distraction from her anxiety.

Doyle coughed to buy himself time to answer her. He assumed that Angel would rather tell Buffy about his desire to seek atonement, and Doyle didn't want to spoil that. "Oh, you know, just here to help."

"Why?"

"Why must you ask?" Doyle countered. "Ya need to learn to just accept that things are the way they are sometimes."

Buffy frowned, but didn't comment.

At that moment, Angel entered the mansion carrying the still unconscious Faith in his arms.

"Why'd ya bring her here?" Doyle griped. "She makes me nervous."

"Angel?" Buffy questioned wide-eyed.

Angel ignored them both and set Faith down by the fireplace. "Buffy, remember the trunk in the closet I asked you not to open?"

Buffy's mind flew back in time and recalled the memory. She'd still been settling into the mansion, transferring clothes and such, leaving half her wardrobe at her house and half at the mansion. She'd just commandeered half the closet and was, admittedly, snooping around Angel's side of the closet. She'd flipped through his dress shirts, some of them much finer quality than others. She'd found a discarded fedora from the forties that she'd placed on her head with a smile, wondering how she was going to convince Angel to wear it. She'd been looking at his boots (he actually had quite an impressive stock) when she'd found the trunk. It was old and antique-y looking, sparking Buffy's curiosity. She'd tried to open it, but it hadn't budged. That's when she'd noticed that she needed a key.

Angel had come in then, and the smile that he'd been wearing had dropped immediately. _"What?"_ Buffy had asked with a frown.

"_You don't want to open that." _

"_Why not?"_

"_Because some things are better left alone."_

Angel had asked her not to open it or go looking for the key, and Buffy had agreed, even though she hadn't understood what could cause Angel to act like he did concerning the trunk.

Buffy's mind returned to the present, focusing on Angel, whose back was to her. "I remember."

"Go to my desk. The top left drawer has a false bottom. Get the key, open the trunk, and bring the chains," Angel ordered quietly.

Buffy was frozen for a moment. _Chains?_

"Before she wakes up," Angel prompted her.

"Right," Buffy replied dazed. _Chains? _

Buffy shook her head and turned on her heel, quickly heading up the stairs to their bedroom. She went to Angel's desk. She'd always admired it, the old, polished wood. Angel cared a great deal about it, and she knew it had some emotional connection to him, though she hadn't found the right time to ask yet. Focusing on her task, Buffy opened the top left hand drawer and quickly emptied it of its contents before she let her hand feel the bottom, searching for the latch that would trigger the false bottom to open. She finally found it in the very back corner. She'd have never known it was there unless she'd been looking for it. Even then she doubted that anyone would have found it.

Not sparing the ingenuity of the false bottom a moment more of thought, Buffy grabbed the key. It was an old skeleton key, and the weight of it was solid in her small hand. This was only serving as a reminder that Angel had lived far longer than she had, and while he knew everything about her, she wasn't anywhere near knowing half of everything about him.

Buffy went to the closet and immediately knelt by the trunk. She quickly unlocked it and lifted the lid. She didn't take a second longer than necessary. She grabbed the heavy chains and fished them out of the trunk's depths, ignoring the ominous clinking sound that they made. Once she'd gathered the chains she shut the lid of the trunk and turned away from it, refusing to acknowledge what else she'd seen in there.

Angel was in the exact same spot when Buffy returned with the chains. She knelt by his side and Angel wordlessly took the chains and proceed to use them to secure Faith to the wall. They were quiet for a few moments before Angel turned to her. His chocolate brown eyes were troubled, but determined.

"You and Doyle should probably be outside when she wakes up. It won't do any good for you two to be here," he told them.

Buffy wanted to argue, but she knew he was right.

Faith took that moment to moan slightly, as if acting on some unheard cue, and Buffy quickly stood and went out into the garden, Doyle following behind her.

Angel settled on the coffee table, facing Faith, twirling the baseball bat in his hands. He risked a glance out towards the garden. He couldn't see Buffy, but he could picture her in his mind's eye. She was standing, her arms were wrapped around herself as she stared up at the sky. She'd have questions, and Angel didn't know if he would answer them.

Faith moaned again, and began to shift, the chains clinking with the movement. Angel's attention snapped to hers the moment she opened her eyes. Faith was dazed for a second, before she realized that she was chained to the wall. She yanked at the chains experimentally before rubbing her wrists. She looked up at him with a smirk, taking in her new situation with a false ease.

"Finally decided to tie me up, huh?" she asked playfully. "I always knew you weren't really a one-Slayer-guy."

Angel continued to play with the bat. "I'm sorry about the chains," he apologized. "It's not that I don't trust you…actually, it _is_ that I don't trust you." Angel set the bat aside as he focused all his attention on Faith.

"The thing with Xander, I know what it looked like, but we were just playing," Faith explained carelessly.

"And he forgot the safety word," Angel mocked her evenly, his disbelief apparent. "Is that it?"

"Safety words are for wusses."

Angel got up and crouched in front of Faith, just out of her reach. "I bet you're not to big on trust games, are you Faith?"

"What, are you going to shrink me now?" Faith scoffed disdainfully. "Is that it?"

"No, I just want to talk to you."

"That's what they always say. And then it's 'Lemme stay the night. I promise I won't try anything.'"

Angel knew when to give it a rest. "Alright, you wanna go the long way around, fine." He stood up. "I'm not getting any older."

Angel walked out into the garden, and Buffy immediately went to him. "How is she?"

"It's like talking to a wall," Angel told her dryly. "Except you get more from a wall."

"But you'll keep trying, right?" Buffy pushed and Angel wrapped an arm around her waist, his hand settling low on her hip.

"Sure. We're just getting started," he assured her, glad that she was focusing on Faith instead of the contents of the trunk.

"So, what do I do?" Buffy asked helplessly. She wanted to do _something_. Anything.

Angel smiled at her apologetically. He knew how she felt. "Look, right now, there's nothing you can do."

Buffy frowned, but was undeterred. "Well, this is bound to last awhile, right?" she asked. "So, I'll just go to Faith's and get some of her stuff. That way she'll see that we're on her side."

Angel knew that it wouldn't accomplish nothing. If anything, Faith would assume that they were trying to lure her into a false sense of security. She simply didn't trust…but Angel would indulge Buffy. "That's a good idea."

"Okay," Buffy brightened a little now that she had something to do. A task. "I'll be right back."

"Buffy," Angel stopped her as she pulled away and placed his hands on her shoulders. He had to tell her the truth about how this could go down with Faith. She needed to hear it. "Look, I—I don't want you to get your hopes up. She may not want us to help her."

"She does," Buffy insisted. "She just doesn't know how to say it."

Angel fought not to smile. Situations such as these always brought out their age difference. Buffy's innocence was something that Angel treasured. He loved how she wasn't a cynic like he was. He loved how she was always so optimistic…but Angel had lived long enough to know that sometimes people didn't want help. Whether because they were too afraid to accept it or too prideful, sometimes people just didn't want to be helped. Faith's situation was one where Angel would have to tread carefully and play his cards right at the most opportune moment. Murder was a concept that Angel knew all too well, as well as the ramifications.

"She killed a man," Angel tried to explain to Buffy. "That changes everything for her."

Buffy shook her head. "Giles said that with counseling, they might not even have to lock her up."

"That's not what I mean," Angel replied evenly. "She's taken a life."

"I know," Buffy frowned, not seeing the point.

"She has a taste for it now."

* * *

><p>Angel paced past Faith. "I know what's going on with you."<p>

"Join the club," Fain snorted. "Everyone seems to have a theory."

"Hmm," Angel hummed noncommittally. "But I know what it's like to take a life. To feel a future, a world of possibilities, snuffed out by your own hand. I know the power in it, the exhilaration. It was like a drug for me."

"Yeah?" Faith replied sarcastically. "Sounds like you need help to me, a professional maybe."

"A professional wouldn't have helped me," Angel returned easily as he sat down on the coffee table. _I would have killed him before he even tried. _Angel added in his head. "I stopped when I got my soul back, my human heart."

"Goody for you," Faith cajoled insolently. "Now, if we're gonna party, let's get on with it." She motioned to her chained wrists. "Otherwise, could you let me out of these?"

"Faith you have a choice," Angel ignored her. "You've tasted something few ever do. I mean, to kill without remorse is to feel like a god."

Faith struggled against the chains. "Right now, all I feel is a cramp in my wrist!" Faith continued to yank at the chains. "So let me go!"

Angel ignored her again, crouching down in front of her. "But you're not a god," he continued. "You're not much more than a child. Going down this path will ruin you. You can't imagine the price for true evil."

"Yeah?" Faith sneered. "I hope evil takes MasterCard."

Angel couldn't help but smile. "You and me, Faith," he said as he stood. "We're a lot alike."

Faith scoffed.

"Time was I thought humans existed just to hurt each other," Angel explained. "But then I came here, and I found out that there are other types of people." Angel's lips pulled up at the corners in a small smile as he thought of Buffy. "People who genuinely wanted to do right. And they make mistakes. And they fall down, you know, but they keep caring—keep trying. If you can trust us, Faith, this can all change. You don't have to disappear into the darkness," he finished softly, fervently, and he could see that he was getting through to her.

Faith was silent for a long moment before she shrugged, and held out her wrists. "Can I go now? Nice chattin' with you and all, but I got places to go, people to see, _demons_ to kill…"

Angel studied Faith, his eyes narrowing slightly. There was truly nothing he could do from here. From here on out, it was all on Faith. He'd said his piece and he knew it did no good to beat a dead horse.

Angel unlocked the chains.

"You're actually letting me go?" Faith raised her eyebrows. "Wow. I'm surprised…slightly disappointed in a way," she couldn't help but smirk sultrily at him. "But surprised."

"It's all on you now," Angel told her. "Your decision. Your life. I can't tell you what to do."

"Damn straight," Faith agreed as she moved past him.

She got to the door and thought about pausing and turning back to Angel to say—something. A 'thank you' didn't seem to be what she was looking for, but it was close. The clawing guilt that she'd been fighting was so close to the surface, she could barely beat it back down. Faith thought back through her conversations with Buffy and with Angel. She remembered Allan Finch's wide, terrified eyes. She remembered the blood. She quickly flashed through the events of the past thirty-six hours.

She made her decision, and shut the door without saying anything.

* * *

><p>Faith knew where she was going. She was going to the docks, and she was going to hop a freighter. She was going to escape.<p>

She'd gotten to the docks easily enough. No trouble, no one stopping her…

And then Little-Miss-Goodie-Two-Shoes showed up and ruined it.

"You don't give up do you?" she asked Buffy.

"Not on my friends, no," Buffy answered truthfully. When she'd come back to the mansion to find that Angel had let Faith go, Buffy had immediately gone back to the motel. Faith hadn't been there...

There was only one other place that Buffy knew Faith would be.

"Yeah, because you and me are such solid buds, right?" Faith snorted sarcastically.

"We could be," Buffy retorted. "It's not too late."

Faith's face contorted in disdainful disgust, her resentment rearing its ugly head. "To what? Change and be more like you? Little-Miss-Goodie-Two-Shoes? Ain't happening, B."

"Faith, no one is asking you to be like me, but you can't go on like this." Buffy tried not to let Angel's words enter her mind, but she couldn't stop them.

_Some people just don't want to be helped._

Faith suddenly grinned at her, and it made Buffy uncomfortable. There was just something…off about it. "Scares you, doesn't it?" she asked.

Buffy wasn't going to deny it. "Yeah, it scares me. Faith, you're hurting people. You're hurting yourself."

"But that's not it." Faith advanced on Buffy, but the blonde-Slayer held her ground. "That's not what bothers you so much. What bugs you out is that you _know_ I'm right. You know in your gut that we don't need the law. We _are_ the law."

"No," Buffy disagreed firmly before turning around and walking back the way she'd come. She hated that Angel was probably right, but she had so desperately hoped he'd been wrong. Now, though, with Faith trailing along after her, becoming more and more passionate the longer she spoke, Buffy was beginning to see that Faith was on her own.

"Yes. You know exactly what I'm talking about because you have it in you too. I've seen it, B. You've got the lust, and I'm not just talking about screwing vampires."

That caused Buffy to whirl around to face Faith, her eyes glittering with fury. "Don't you _dare_ bring him into this," she warned darkly.

"It was good, wasn't it?" Faith taunted. "The sex. The danger. Bet part of you even dug him when he went psycho…"

"No!" Buffy argued horrified at the thought and the small part of her that knew Faith was right.

"See, you need me to toe the line because you're afraid you'll go over it, right B?" Faith continued to follow her. "You can't handle watching me living my own way, having a blast, because it tempts you! You know it could be you!"

Buffy had had enough. She stopped, spun on her heel, and backhanded Faith across the face.

Faith's head jerked to the side, and she brought a hand up to her cheek. She grinned at Buffy. "That's my girl."

For a split second, Buffy considered continuing the fight, but she decided against it. It wouldn't do any good. "No. I'm not going to do this."

Faith grabbed her arm and spun her back around. "Why not? It feels good, doesn't it? Blood rising…"

Buffy suddenly heard a noise from above them and looked up in time to see a pile of crates tumbling down upon them. Having only seconds to act, Buffy shoved Faith back as hard as she could before taking the brunt of the impact. Buffy hit the ground hard and lights flashed before her eyes as she fought against unconsciousness. She was dazed, and heard the muffled sounds of a fight going on around her. She willed herself to move, but it was like her body was refusing to respond. Buffy growled under her breath and tried again, this time managing to prop herself up on an elbow to look around. She saw Faith fighting Trick and some of his goons and the urge to fight and protect welled within her. Buffy forced back her dazedness and fought to get to her feet. She tossed the crates off her legs and got to her feet wobbly, trying to find some balance.

Just her luck, right as she felt like she was on solid ground, Trick punched in the face, causing her to fall back into the crates. Buffy staggered back to her feet and faced Trick. She tried to backhand him, but he blocked it. Buffy's next punch to his abdomen connected, but it was weak and didn't even cause him to stumble. Trick sent a right hook her way, and Buffy didn't have time to block. She stumbled back from the force of the blow and fought to keep her footing. However, Trick spared no moment for possible recovery and his fist hit Buffy under the jaw, causing her head to snap up and her body fly back into another pile of crates.

Suddenly, Buffy felt a cord wrap around her neck. Trick yanked on the cord, and Buffy gasped and pulled at the cord as it cut off her air. He slung her into the pallet of crates, and Buffy was barely able to get a sense that she'd been knocked to the ground before Trick yanked on the cord again, pulling her up and slamming her against the wall.

Buffy struggled to get loose, but she was too weak and too dazed. She was just acting on instinct, fighting for air. She felt Trick lean in towards her neck. "I hear once you taste Slayer you never wanna go back."

Buffy renewed her struggle, but it seemed to be hopeless. She sensed Trick's teeth coming closer and closer to her neck, but the bite never came. Instead, she heard, "Oh, no. No, this is no good at all."

Trick exploded into dust, and the cord dropped to the dock. Buffy gasped, greedily sucking in much needed air. She turned and saw Faith, her stake raised where Trick's heart had been. They stared at each other warily, waiting for the other to make a move. Faith lowered her stake, and Buffy massaged her neck. There was another awkward silence before Buffy broke it. "Thank you."

* * *

><p>"Okay, how do I look?" Doyle asked as he ran a hand through his short hair. "Good? Great, even?"<p>

Buffy rolled her eyes, turning to look at Doyle who was currently fidgeting in the backseat of the Plymouth. "Doyle, it's not like we're taking you to your own funeral."

"Funeral? Funeral?" Doyle repeated. "You're tryin' to kill me!"

Angel snickered as he pulled into the Sunnydale High School parking lot. "Give it a rest Doyle. Calm down."

"Just nervous," Doyle muttered. "You know…nervous."

"The only person you have to fear is Cordelia," Buffy told him comfortingly. "She can be scary," she teased with a smile.

"Alright," Doyle took a deep breath and stepped out of the car. "Take me to my doom."

Angel scoffed, and took Doyle by the arm, leading him into the library. All the Scoobies looked up at their entrance, and their gazes immediately settled on Doyle.

"Buffy, Angel, who is this?" Giles asked warily, his eyes narrowed behind his glasses.

"Oh, don't worry 'bout me," Doyle smiled nervously. "I'm one of you guys. Fightin' the good fight."

Silence.

"Friend of Angel's…" Doyle tried.

Silence.

"And me," Buffy interrupted. "He's my friend. I've never had an Irish friend."

Angel frowned. "Forgetting something?"

"What?" Buffy muttered. "You don't have the accent anymore…"

"That doesn't matter…" Angel argued with a slight pout.

Buffy fought not to grin.

"Oh, come on, it's just a new guy!" Cordelia huffed as she grabbed her purse. "I don't know why I even came. It's not like I actually like any of you."

Doyle's eyes lit up, and Buffy and Angel shared a look.

"Nice to meet you too, Princess," Doyle smiled with all the charm he could muster.

* * *

><p>Across town, Faith looked up at the building in front of her. Striding forward confidently, she threw open the doors and walked into the building like she owned it. Climbing into the elevator, she punched the button for the top floor. Incredibly ridiculous, yet predictably soothing elevator music played that Faith ignored. The doors opened and Faith was on the move again, completely bypassing the desk secretary.<p>

"You can't go in there!" she protested, but Faith continued on. She was not to be stopped.

She opened the door and shut it, turning to face the man that sat behind a large desk. "You sent your boy to kill me," she accused his surprised face.

"That's right, I did."

"He's dust."

"I thought he might be, what with you standing here and all."

"I guess that means you have a job opening."

The Mayor smiled.

* * *

><p><strong>Yes, Faith is still going to go bad. I know a few of you were hoping that she wouldn't, but I have reasons! Faith's character is one that needs to go through some trials to figure out who she really is. She's too independent and too opinionated to follow another's advice or guidance. For Faith to get where she was in S7 of Buffy, she needs to go through all this.<strong>

**And for those of you who are disappointed that Buffy and Angel didn't talk about what was in the trunk, never fear! I DO get to that in the next chapter. Wanna guess what episode? (Drum Roll) "Enemies!" Yes, I'm excited too...mainly because it has one of the best Angel/Buffy lines ever AND Angel punches Xander in the face...**

**So...until next time! Hopefully fairly soon!**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	29. Chapter 29

**A/N: Oh, my! Look at this! You only had to wait two days for an update! Ha! I'm on a roll! Oh, how I missed this! **

**I want to say "THANK YOU!" to everyone who reviews! You guys are AWESOME and I love you dearly! Thank you, thank you! Getting as many reviews as I do is a great compliment, and I don't take them for granted. Thank you, thank you!**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Look-ee here! I updated after only two days!**_

**Buffy: Yippie for you.**

**Angel: Buffy, be nice.**

**Buffy: Nice? Nice? She tried to pull you away from me last disclaimer!**

_**Me: See? Not only is she high maintance, but she's clingy too!**_

**Buffy: Hey! I am not clingy!**

_**Me: Are too.**_

**Buffy: Are not!**

_**Me: Are too!**_

**Buffy: Are not!**

**Angel: You both are, and I don't really mind, okay? **

**Giles: I hate to interrupt this teenage angst driven disclaimer, but can we continue on to the chapter?**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 29<p>

"Ow! Oh, what are you nuts? Going around punching people?"

Buffy frowned at the demon in front of her. He wasn't acting very demon-y.

"People?" she questioned as she took of his hat, revealing his horns.

"So, what? I'm a demon. That makes it okay?" the demon pursued with a sniff.

Buffy and Faith raised their stakes, which spurned the demon into a rushed babble. "Whoa, hold it! Stake me now and you never find out what I got for ya, huh? Demon seeks Slayers, kind of unusual, huh?" he pointed out hopefully.

"Talk fast," Faith warned.

"How would you like to get your hands on the Books of Ascension?"

Buffy raised her eyebrows. "Never heard of 'em."

The demon stared at them dubiously. "The Books of Ascension? Very powerful and I'm not talking about the prose. They deal with some, uh, dark stuff and the Mayor would hate for somebody to get a hold of it before he, ah, you know…"

"Don't know," Buffy shook her head. This demon was confusing. "Before he what?"

"Hey, hey, read 'em and weep, that's all I got to say," the demon waved off her question like the peddler he was. "Tomorrow, I get the books. Meet me here and if the price is right, I'll give the books to you."

Buffy's lips pursed into a thin line as she thought about his offer, though it really seemed too good a chance to pass up—she was willing to give just about anything for a bit of info on the Mayor. "Not really looking to trade with a demon," she couldn't help but voice her opinion.

"And if this were still a barter economy that would be a problem," the demon retorted without missing a beat. "I want cash, Princess. Five large for the whole set."

"So you can buy…I'm guess here…skin care products?" Faith guessed sarcastically.

"Plane ticket," the demon corrected. "Out of the Hellmouth before it's adios Slayer Loco. So, five G's, what do you say?"

Faith pretended to think. "I think 'die fiend' sort of sums it up, wouldn't you say?"

The demon peddler jumped up between them and ran off. Faith made the move to follow, but Buffy held her back. "Oh, let him go," she said with a sigh. "He doesn't look the 'threat to humanity' type."

"A demon's a demon," Faith argued frustrated. Buffy still didn't get it. Oh well, it was her loss.

"I'd like to know about these books of Ascension," Buffy explained as they walked through the cemetery, back towards the entrance. "Anything that would pin down the Mayor would be great," she continued.

"Yeah," Faith agreed, knowing exactly where she was heading after she left Buffy. "It'd be great."

* * *

><p>"Alright." Doyle looked at the punching bag. "What do I do?"<p>

Angel stared at the half-demon incredulously. "I don't know, hit it, maybe?" he suggested sarcastically.

Doyle continued to stare at the punching bag. "Um, any kinda technique? Any fancy stuff?"

"Just hit the damn thing."

Doyle punched the bag, barely causing it to swing back.

"Okay," Angel sighed. New tactic. "Imagine that it's someone's face. Someone you really hate."

Doyle thought for a moment and then threw a second punch. And then another…and another…and another…each punch growing in intensity until the punching bag was swinging.

This continued on for a few minutes before Doyle collapsed in exhaustion. Angel settled down beside his fellow Irishman, letting him catch his breath. "So," Angel said after a moment. "Whose face did you just break?"

Doyle took a deep breath. "There was this guy, real nasty fellow. Stole from me every day," he explained. "Never could stop him. He'd just come and take everything I had—every day for a year he tormented me."

Angel frowned. "When was this?"

"Second grade." Doyle was oblivious to Angel fighting a grin as he continued to explain. "Stole my lunch every day, every single day he stole it! Mum packed me cookies, you see. They were the best cookies and he stole them and everything else!"

"I'm sure they were great cookies," Angel put a reassuring hand on Doyle's shoulder.

Doyle nodded. "They were the best."

"Well—" Angel began but he was cut off by Doyle's pained gasp.

Angel waited anxiously for Doyle to return to the present. Doyle groaned as his eyes fluttered open. "What did you see?" Angel asked.

"Faith," Doyle rubbed his temples, trying to massage the vision induced headache away. "There's this demon—blood—an apartment."

"What does it matter that Faith killed a demon?" Angel asked confused. "She's a Slayer."

"There was something…important there," Doyle tried to remember. "A book."

Angel frowned dubiously. "Faith killed a demon for a book?"

"Don't look at me, I'm just the messenger," Doyle retorted defensively. "It's your job to figure this stuff out."

Angel sighed. This was still so new, so odd—saving people because Doyle got a vision. He didn't know _why_ they needed saving, he didn't know _who_ they were—he just knew they needed to be saved. And apparently, Angel was meant to be the person doing the saving.

"Okay, but you gotta give me more to go on," Angel told Doyle. "What did this guy look like?"

"Not the prettiest," Doyle began, but was cut off from saying anything more when Buffy came in.

"Hey, guys," Buffy smiled. "What's…" she trailed off as she felt the tension in the room. "What's up?"

"Doyle had a vision," Angel answered. "Faith killed a demon. Apparently, it's important that he doesn't die."

"Or doesn't lose the book," Doyle countered. "If that's why she killed him."

"The Books of Ascension?" Buffy asked, feeling her stomach plummet somewhere below her knees.

Angel looked up at her intently. "What do you know?"

"We met a demon on patrol," Buffy began to explain, but Doyle interrupted.

"Tell him on the way," he advised. "Don't think time is on your side…"

"Come on," Angel grabbed her hand and both of them hurried towards the Plymouth.

Angel jumped into the driver's seat and threw the car into drive the moment Buffy's door had closed. "Okay, tell me everything," Angel said as they drove.

"Go to Restful Cemetery," Buffy ordered first. "That's where we met him on patrol."

"Why didn't you kill him?"

Buffy shrugged. "He wasn't evil. He was, normal, I guess. Anyway, back on topic—he actually sought us out. He told us about these Books of Ascension and that they are about the Mayor or will help him in some way. I don't know for sure, but I know that they're important."

"Then why would Faith kill him?" Angel sighed as he pulled over to the curb outside the cemetery.

"You're going to track him?" Buffy assumed.

"Yeah."

"Got an idea where to go?"

Angel took a deep breath. There was an unfamiliar scent floating on the breeze, heading south. It wasn't vampire and it wasn't human. Angel was betting it was there guy. "Yeah, this way," he said as he grabbed her hand and began to follow the scent.

The scent led them to a little, slightly run-down apartment. Angel stopped at the doorway and cursed in frustration. "What is it?" Buffy asked worriedly.

"Blood."

Without saying another word, Angel entered the apartment and saw the dead demon on the floor—the Books of Ascension nowhere in sight. "We're too late."

* * *

><p>"I thought she was getting better," Buffy lamented in the library. "I thought that, that maybe she was, you know, accepting what she'd done…"<p>

"If we know anything about Faith, we know she's a good actor," Giles sighed in disappointment. "I'm afraid that this was always a likely possibility."

"She's much too volatile," Wesley agreed.

Angel was standing in silence, staring broodingly at the wall. Of all of them, he should have realized first. He should have seen something, anything that would suggest Faith hadn't stopped killing. He should have seen _something_. Angel muttered a stream of curses far too low for anyone to hear. This was his fault. He hadn't acted on Doyle's vision in time. He'd failed. And because of his failure, they'd lost the Books of Ascension.

And then that very night, Faith had come to him, blood on her hands, playing the perfect part of the horrified 'oh my God, what have I done?' girl. The worst part was that if Angel hadn't already known that she'd killed the demon and why, he would have believed her. Angel could tolerate many things, but being played wasn't one of them.

"Why would she take the books?" Buffy asked frustrated. "It just doesn't make sense. I mean, I know that there was no way we were going to pay five grand for them, but still…we would have gotten them another way." Buffy frowned as she stared at the table. "It just doesn't make sense," she repeated.

"It does if," Wesley began hesitantly. "If Faith is working with the Mayor."

"What?" Buffy balked at the idea. "No, no, no," she shook her head. "No, Faith wouldn't do that…"

"Buffy—" Giles began sadly.

"No!" Buffy interrupted, denying the idea. "No, she wouldn't! She's a Slayer! She's good, she's…"

"She's not you, Buffy," Angel spoke gently, cutting her off.

"But—"

"She's not you," Angel repeated again, coming to stand in front of her. He traced her cheekbone lightly with his fingertips. "I'm sorry, Buffy, but I think Wes is right."

"Yes," Giles sighed as he took off his glasses and cleaned them with the hem of his sweater. "Yes, it does appear to be so."

Buffy closed her eyes tightly for a moment, and when she opened them she was determined, pushing aside her disbelief and focusing on the present. "Okay, then. Faith's gone to the dark side. Any idea how long she's been working for the Mayor?"

"I'd say not too long." Angel fell into the chair next to Buffy with a huff. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned back in the chair. "But you can learn a lot of information quickly. There's no telling how much she knows about the Mayor's plans."

"But she knows more than we know," Wesley pointed out. They were all silent for a moment as they thought. "We need to figure out a way to find out how much Faith knows about the Mayor's plans," he voiced what they were all thinking.

"How to go about that though, is the question," Giles stared at the tabletop as if he expected the answer to appear within it. "I believe it's safe to assume that some trickery will be involved."

"There's no way Faith will tell us on her own," Angel shook his head. "She thinks she's found her place. She's not going to do anything to throw that away."

"We'll have to make her believe that she has the high ground," Wesley said, his brows furrowed in thought. "She has to feel confident, in control."

"But how?" Buffy asked them quietly, the sadness and bitter disappointment in her tone making Angel's chest tighten painfully.

Suddenly, a mist of smoke appeared back in the book stacks, causing everyone to look up in shock. Out of the smoke a man clad in black robes became visible, though only the blue skin of his face and the yellow of his eyes were seen.

Giles strode forward, gave a little bow, which the strange being copied.

"Rupert Giles," the man said in a deep voice.

Giles smiled. "Mage," he greeted. "How is the family?"

"Prosperous," the Mage answered, and Buffy thought he might be smiling underneath the black of his veil. "I call on you out of courtesy. I have been summoned to perform a spell by your Mayor."

Buffy stiffened in her chair, her eyes narrowed into thin slits. She opened her mouth to speak, but Angel put his hand over hers, and shook his head slightly. Buffy frowned but complied, staying quiet.

"Really?" Giles raised his eyebrows. "May I be so bold as to inquire what type of spell?"

The Mage nodded. "He wishes me to take away a vampire's soul." He looked at Angel. "And the vampire is present."

"No!" Buffy protested, ignoring Angel's staying hands and rushing to Giles' side. "No, you can't!"

The Mage stared at her for a moment before looking at Giles. "The little one is troubled. Why?"

"She is in love with the vampire," Giles explained. "If you release his soul, you shall unleash a plague of despair and destruction upon this town."

The Mage seemed troubled by this. "I have given my word."

"Please!" Buffy begged. "Don't! The Mayor's evil! He's just trying to get Angel out of the picture!"

"The Mayor is evil?" the Mage looked back to Giles, who nodded.

"Yes. He has plans for an Ascension, yet we do not know when," Giles explained. "However, we have reason to believe that it will be sooner rather than later."

"This troubles me," the Mage said. "But I have given my word that the vampire's soul shall be removed."

"No!" Buffy wailed something akin to panic crawling in her chest. She couldn't go through that again. She couldn't. She couldn't see _him_ again.

"Buffy," Angel said softly, coming up behind her and gently taking her arm and pulling her back away from the Mage and Giles. "It'll be okay," he assured her, even though he was fighting back his own panic.

Buffy clung to him tightly, burying her head in his chest. The Mage watched their interaction with interest, before looking back at Giles. "Your little one loves him."

Giles nodded. "My friend, I have a favor to ask of you."

"I am in your debt," the Mage replied with a nod of his own. "Tell me of this favor."

"I ask that you not take this vampire's soul. I ask that you only make it appear to be so." Giles waited for the Mage's answer, barely breathing. He was counting on the fact that Mage's always fulfilled a debt. They were a noble race, and Giles hoped that this would work in his favor.

"I shall do so," the Mage finally answered. He looked to Angel and Buffy and then back to Giles. "Your Mayor wishes the spell be done tonight. He has enlisted the help of the other Slayer."

Giles nodded. "Thank you, my friend."

The Mage said nothing. He simply walked backwards a step or two and then disappeared in a light cloud of smoke. All was quiet for a few seconds until Wesley burst out, "Good Lord! A Mage! Giles, you're friends with a Mage!"

Giles looked at Wesley, amusement dancing in his eyes behind his glasses. "Yes."

"How is he in your debt?" Angel asked curiously.

"I introduced him to his wife."

"Well, I'm happy for your matchmaker skills Giles," Buffy smiled tiredly. This encounter had been draining. The mere idea, however shortly entertained, that Angel would lose his soul was draining. Buffy leaned into Angel, so much so that he was supporting the majority of her weight.

"Alright," Wesley rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "If the Mage makes it appear as though Angel is Angelus once more…" he trailed off. "We have to use that misconception to our advantage."

"The Mayor probably hopes that I'll join him," Angel theorized. "Apparently, he hasn't done his homework. I'd never work under anyone."

An idea popped into Buffy's head. It was a good idea. It was a terrible idea. It was both. It would be painful, but it would work. "I have a plan," she said quietly.

Everyone waited for Buffy to continue, but when she didn't, Giles prompted her. "Yes?"

Buffy sighed, stepping away from Angel. She wrapped her arms around herself and stared at a spot on the wall. "Angel would pretend that the Mage's spell worked."

"Buffy…" Angel began slowly.

"I know, Angel, I know," Buffy cut him off quickly, fighting back tears at the egregious task she was appointing him. "But if you pretended to be Angelus, you could meet the Mayor. You know that that's what they want. They want Angelus on their side. They know it will help them and torture me." Angel flinched at the word _torture_. "And Faith—" Buffy paused. "Faith has always been attracted to you. Angelus would just turn her on more."

"Buffy—" Angel protested, but it was weak. He knew she was right.

"We wouldn't have to fool them for long," Buffy talked over him. "Just long enough for you to find out all you can."

"I wouldn't spend any time with the Mayor," Angel argued. "I'd come right after you."

"They know that," Buffy replied. "That's their plan, I think. They want me and you out of the picture."

Angel swallowed. "They want me to kill you."

Buffy barely had the courage to meet his gaze, and when she did she flinched at the immeasurable pain and torment in Angel's eyes.

"Faith would want to accompany you," Wesley said quietly, looking at Angel. "She harbor's a deep resentment toward Buffy. I think she'd think she was on the higher ground."

"Confident enough to gloat," Buffy said quietly, her eyes never leaving Angel. Slowly, she closed the distance between them. She ignored that they weren't alone in the room, placing both hands on his chest. "Angel," Buffy pleaded softly. "I know it will be hard, and I hate to ask you to do this, but—"

"It will work," Angel finished for her, meeting her gaze, tender agony reflected in his eyes. "But what about you?" he asked as he cupped her face in his hands. "This will be just has hard on you, if not harder."

Buffy nodded. "I know, but," she trailed off, trying to find the words. "But it will work," she said numbly, realizing that there were no words to describe what she was about to go through.

* * *

><p>Buffy and Angel were silent as they entered the mansion. Neither voiced the fact that it would be dark soon. Without any prelude, the moment they were in the room, Angel's lips were on hers. Buffy's lips parted of their own accord, letting Angel deepen the kiss without a second thought. Angel's hands slid down her back before slipping underneath her shirt. Her skin felt like it was hot as flame against his cool touch, and a low growl that was almost like an appreciative purr resonated in Angel's throat. Buffy heard the telltale rib of fabric and knew that her shirt was now in pieces on the floor, but she didn't care. Her hands flew to the buttons on his shirt, and she wasted no time in yanking it open, causing buttons to fly everywhere.<p>

Her hands skimmed over his shoulders, across his chest, down his stomach. She undid his belt and tossed it towards the far corner of the room as she and Angel fell onto the bed. Angel's lips trailed down her neck, nipping and sucking as his hands ran down her body.

This time, their love wasn't all about _love_. It was about claiming. It was primal. She was his, and he was hers. Nothing was going to change that. Not Faith. Not the Mayor. No one.

* * *

><p>Later, Angel and Buffy both sat in the closet, both of them looking at the antique trunk in front of them. They hadn't mentioned its contents since the night Angel had told Buffy to bring the chains, but tonight they were going to need those chains once again.<p>

The key in Angel's hand felt too heavy. It always did.

With a sigh, Angel unlocked the trunk and lifted the lid. He stared at the trunks contents. Chains. Chinese marble pokers. A few other favorite torture devices he had utilized over the years. There were clothes too. Leather pants, silk shirts. There were stacks upon stacks of bills, all of various currencies. None of this was his and yet it was.

"You kept it all," Buffy said quietly. "Why?"

"It's not all of it," Angel shook his head. "Not nearly."

"Why?" Buffy repeated. "Why keep it?"

"I don't know," Angel replied truthfully. "I guess it's just a part of me, _he's_ a part of me—a darkness, but a part of me nonetheless."

They were both silent for a moment, staring at the contents. Buffy had questions of course, but she wasn't sure if she wanted the answers or if she wanted Angel to go through the pain of answering them, if he would actually answer them anyway. So, Buffy reached in, grabbed the chains and then slammed the trunk lid closed. She took the key from Angel's hand, locked the trunk, and then placed the key back in his palm.

Angel looked at her curious and confused. Buffy offered him a small smile. "I'm not worrying about the past. The present's kinda more my thing." She leaned into him. "Presently, you're here, with me, soulful and fancy-free."

A laugh that was both incredulous and exasperated at the same time slipped from Angel's lips, and he shook his head. He offered her a hand, and they left the closet and the past behind, focused on the present.

"I love you," Angel said as he kissed her temple. "Don't forget that."

Buffy smiled. "I'll never forget."

* * *

><p>Angel was pacing. It'd been dark for two hours and Faith hadn't shown up yet. He was getting anxious. Actually, he was a long way past anxious. He hated this, but he knew it would work. He hated that he knew it would work.<p>

The slight creak of the mansion door alerted him to Faith's presence, and Angel turned to face her. "Faith."

"Hey," Faith offered him a small, almost impish smile. "Sorry I busted in last night."

Angel wasn't really in the mood to hear her false apologies. "What do you want, Faith?"

"Look, I'm not so good at apologies," Faith began as she moved towards him. "Mostly because I think the world's out to screw me and I think I'm more owed than owing." Faith shrugged, looking slightly embarrassed. Angel had to admit, Faith was a good actress. "But I was thinking about last night and I wanted you to know that I was really sorry."

"It's alright, Faith," Angel consoled, playing his part perfectly.

"No, it's not alright," Faith argued firmly. "Yeah, I was freaked and I needed somebody, but you're with Buffy. I should know better."

Angel couldn't argue that. "Yeah, okay."

Faith was now in arms reach, and Angel couldn't stop himself from backing away. Even though he knew what was coming, even though he knew he wasn't going to lose his soul, he couldn't help the instinctual precaution.

"You don't trust me," Faith stated.

Angel wanted to agree with her, but he had a part to play. "It's not that…"

"Hey, no problem," Faith said, letting just enough dejection into her tone that would cause anyone to want to comfort her. "Join the club."

"Look, Faith, I know what you're going through and how hard it can be," Angel said easily. It was scary how easy it was to do this, how natural it was to trick Faith, to play a part. It was just like Angelus. "It's important you have someone who's been there and who understands what you're going through." Angel grasped Faith by the shoulders and turned her around to face him. He looked at her reassuringly. "Look, I want to trust you…"

Suddenly, Faith smirked, dropping her façade. Angel hated the coldness in her eyes. "Chump," she taunted before throwing a vial of blood on his shirt.

Angel sensed someone else present and looked up to see the Mage. Angel said a quick prayer, hoping that he wasn't about to lose his soul, even though the Mage had given Giles his word. "Faith!" he pleaded as the Mage started to chant.

"I wanted to do this the old-fashioned way," Faith told him with a casual, faux-regretful sigh. "But, hey, your loss," she pitied him. "Lucky I've got some tricks Buffy don't know yet."

"You don't have to do this," Angel tried again, some genuine anxiety slipping into his voice. He knew that the Mage's spell was reaching its climax.

"I know, but it's fun," Faith smiled. "Relax. It'll be over soon."

Bright light shot out from the Mage's hands and engulfed Angel. Angel didn't fight as the magic lifted him off his feet. He played his part perfectly. The lights soon faded and the Mage disappeared. Angel let himself fall to the floor in a heap, vamping out. He felt Faith touch his shoulder and jumped to his feet. Then, he made himself do one of the vilest things he'd ever do for the rest of existence. He kissed Faith hard, forcing his tongue into her mouth, though judging by the way she melted into him, she didn't mind in the slightest.

Showtime.

* * *

><p><strong>And so it begins! I hope you guys liked this chapter! I'm particularly attached to the end. Okay, next chapter two amazing things happen! One: Epic BA lines. Two: Angel punches Xander.**

**Doesn't that just make you smile?**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	30. Chapter 30

**A/N: Alrighty! I got to say that this chapter is probably my favorite of this story. I'm really attached to some of the earlier chapters in this story, but there's just something about this one that just makes me positively giddy. It's probably because of the episode itself. I mean, it's "Enemies." One of my favorite episodes, so it would kinda make sense for this to be my fav chapter, but alas, I'm beginning to ramble.**

**On another happy note...this fic has over 500 reviews! You guys, really? That. Is. Awesome. YOU are AWESOME. Really, take a bow, treat yourself to a cookie, do something to celebrate how awesome you are. :D**

**And may I just say that it is so nice to be updating regularly again? :D**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: (jumps up and down excitedly) I love this chapter!**_

**Angel: (wary) That's either really good or really bad.**

**Buffy: (frowns) I'm probably an emotional wreck.**

**_Me: Probably_.**

**Angel: (half-hearted smile) That means I get to comfort you though.**

**Buffy: (brightens at the idea) That is true. I like it when you comfort me.**

_**Me: Okay, what about me? I'm feeling kind of left out.**_

**Angel from the AISHB world: Don't worry, you have me. **

_**Me: That is so true. (looks at Buffy) Your loss. Ha! Suck it!**_

**Buffy from the AISHB world: That pun was intentional, right?**

_**Me: Of course.**_

**Buffy from the AISHB world. Ah, I taught you well.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 30<p>

Angel kissed Faith a few seconds longer before slapping her away like she was nothing. "Thanks _so_ much," he said empathically. "It's good to have the taste of Slayer back in my mouth. It's like cigarettes, you know? Just when I thought I'd quit," he chuckled as he kicked Faith in the side. "No, don't get up. It's nice to be back in Sunnydale. Nice climate, plenty to eat, no tortured humanity to hold me down…" Angel sighed dramatically; though inwardly he was repulsed at how easy this was—pretending to be him. "But you know what bothers me?" Angel asked grabbing Faith by the neck. "You don't seem to be getting the big picture here, Faith. Now, I don't know why you turned me, but I'm just glad you did."

Faith threw his hand of her neck, and Angel let her. Let her feel as though she was in control. "I've got my reasons," she said as she pulled out a stake.

"Let me guess," Angel raised his eyebrows smugly. "You summoned back the true Angelus because you needed a new boy toy." Angel wondered if there was actually any truth in that statement. "Doesn't work that way."

"You wanna be smart?" Faith challenged. "You listen to me," she threatened and Angel fought not to laugh.

Did she seriously think that he'd listen to her?

"Funny thing about vampires, Faith," Angel said as he took a step towards her. "We don't establish meaningful dialogue with Slayers."

"Not how Buffy tells it," Faith retorted before kicking him in the knee. Angel let himself fall to the ground, and then let her straddle his waist as she held her stake above his heart. "Should have known you'd like it on top," he chuckled.

"You want to listen or you want to die?"

Did she really think she could intimidate him? Angel smirked. "As long as you're there I mostly want you to wriggle, but I'm listening."

"Last time you got like this, Buffy kicked your ass and almost sent you to Hell," Faith reminded him. "You wanna do better this time?"

Angel dropped his vampire visage, showing his human face, making it appear as though he was complying. "Still listening."

"Good boy," Faith replied demeaning, and Angel fought back a growl. If he'd really been Angelus, Faith would have just died. As it was, Angel was even thinking about it. "Now all you got to do is play nice, call a truce, and I'll hook you up with the real power in this town. Interested?"

"Very."

"Then get ready to meet the new boss," Faith smiled before leaning down and claiming his lips.

* * *

><p>Wesley stared at everyone gathered in the library. He hated misleading them, but it was better that very few knew about the plan. "Our enemy has us at a disadvantage," he began. "We seem to be consistently one step behind him. Now he has the Books of Ascension and we must take definitive action."<p>

Cordelia had been staring at Doyle the entire time. "Are you really Irish?"

Doyle smiled, his insides doing backflips at the sound of her voice. Sweet music. "Yeah, I am, Princess."

"Way to focus CC," Xander muttered.

Wesley tried not to let his amusement show on his face. "We need everyone working together. Um, where's Angel?" he asked.

Buffy frowned. She hated lying to the gang, but it was necessary. "I don't know," she lied. "I went to the mansion, but he wasn't there."

"And Faith?" Wesley asked the inevitable follow-up question.

"She's missing too." Buffy hoped that there was no bitterness in her tone. She didn't even want to think about the fact that she knew exactly where Faith was. Probably hanging on Angel's arm, thinking she'd won.

"Which means nothing," Willow was quick to defend. "Two unconnected events."

Buffy wished she still had that optimism.

"What should we do?" she asked.

"Buffy, I think you should try to retrieve the Books of Ascension," Giles advised. "Check out the Mayor's office, but be damned careful. Do not confront the Mayor. We don't know a thing about him."

Buffy nodded, accepting Giles' veiled 'good luck.' Time to go into part two of the plan. "I'll go home stock up on weapons…slip into something more breaking and entering-ish," she said as she slung her bag over her shoulder.

In other words, time to wait for Angel to come get her and lead her back to the mansion.

* * *

><p>Angel surveyed the Mayor's office casually though he was cataloguing every detail. Faith hung on his arm, and Angel ignored the way his skin crawled where she touched him. He and Faith came to stand in front of the Mayor, who was sitting behind his desk, which was practically gleaming in its cleanliness.<p>

"So, can I keep him?" Faith asked him.

Angel fought a growl. It wouldn't help with the dog analogy she seemed to have going.

The Mayor smiled amicably, almost indulgently. "Let's just take things step by step shall we?" he suggested before focusing his attention on Angel. "Now then, Angelus, may I call you Angel?"

Angel didn't know whether to be insulted or to laugh. Had they really not done any research on him at all? Did they know _nothing_ about him?

"Well, actually, I was thinking along the lines of you calling me 'Master'," Angel said in a perfect imitation of Angelus—smug and arrogant…with a dash of insanity.

The Mayor seemed unfazed. "Ah, you know Angelus, attitude may get you attention, but courtesy gets you respect," he chided with a chuckle. "I am the one responsible for your new attitude."

Angel couldn't stand still any longer, and he wanted to put some distance (however little) in between himself and Faith. He idly picked up the letter opener on the Mayor's desk and casually dragged it along the top before he began to prowl around the office. "That's why I'm here," he said in answer to the Mayor's previous statement.

"No problems with the transition?" the Mayor inquired. "No side-effects?"

"Had a soul, now I'm free."

"That's terrific! Poetic too," the Mayor exclaimed excitedly.

_Who the hell is this guy? _Angel had never met such an odd, evil being.

"Not that I read much poetry except for the little ones in Reader's Digest," the Mayor continued on conversationally. "You know, some of those are quite catchy."

Angel couldn't take much more of this. "Hey, I don't mean to rush you, but are you getting to some kind of point?"

"Kids today," the Mayor shook his head and Angel fought not to scowl. Did he just refer to him as a kid? Angel hadn't been a kid in over two centuries. "Rush, rush, rush," the Mayor blazed on. "Well, the point, Angel, is that you are a very powerful young man, good for my Faith, and there just may be a future for you in Sunnydale." Angel had the odd feeling that this meeting was almost like he was 'meeting the parents.' "I see that you're admiring my letter opener," the Mayor observed.

Angel had to be honest. "Well, actually, I was thinking of stabbing you through the heart with it."

To Angel's surprise, the Mayor faced him completely and spread his hands wide. "Please do," he invited.

Knowing that there was much more than meets the eye, Angel threw the blade directly at the Mayor's heart. Faster than a normal human being, the Mayor moved his hand in front of the blade and let it slice right through his palm. He didn't even flinch.

"Nice shot," he commended as he casually withdrew the blade from his palm. He held out his hand and Angel's eyes narrowed when he saw the wound heal before his eyes. "You see, I'm what you might call impervious," the Mayor explained with a smile. "Can't be killed or harmed in any way, and that's just the cornerstone of my plans for this little town of ours."

"Hmm," Angel hummed dismissively. He couldn't help but point out, "can't be killed, but you can't stand germs?"

"Uck," the Mayor shuddered in his chair. "Ick, ew, unsanitary," he muttered before looking up at Angel. "But my question is, now that Faith has brought you back, what are your intentions?"

Angel saw his opening. He knew that his next words would be treacherously painful to say, but he knew he had to say them. It was the plan. "Well, gee, sir, I thought I'd find the Slayer that's been giving you so much trouble and torture, maim, and kill her."

"Fine!" the Mayor praised with a smile. "It's nice to see that you're not one of those slacker types running around these days. Torture Buffy," he ordered and Angel just barely stopped the growl in his throat. "Killing her is fine, just make it a slow one."

Angel stared right into the Mayor's eyes. "My favorite kind," he replied darkly.

"Wonderful, wonderful!" the Mayor beamed. "We can't have a replacement Slayer showing up any time soon. They can't all turn out like my girl Faith," he said with an indulgent smile. "Have fun."

"Let's do it," Faith said, her voice dripping with anticipation as she took Angel's arm and began to lead him out of the office.

"Uh, try to have her home by eleven," the Mayor asked in such a paternal way that Angel fought not to do a double take.

Angel let Faith lead him through the Mayor's offices and out into the street. "Any idea where B is?" Faith asked as they walked.

"Probably her house," Angel replied like he was guessing.

Faith raised her eyebrows. "Thought she was shacking up with you," she shot back before she grinned. "Oh, wait, that wouldn't be happening, would it?"

Angel didn't even bother to answer. He was fighting off the anger that was boiling his blood beneath his skin. The only thing that was preventing him from turning on Faith now and knocking her back into reality was the deep disappoint he felt for her.

"But that's not a problem now, is it?" Faith pulled them to a stop and pressed her body to his, her meaning clear.

Angel smirked and grabbed her hips, his fingers digging in hard enough to bruise. He leaned in to kiss her and she surged up to meet his lips, but at the last second he turned his head to whisper in her ear. "Later," he promised.

He had no intention of keeping that promise.

But Faith didn't need to know that.

She shoved him away with a scowl. "The baddest vamp is a tease?" she asked. "Figures."

Chuckling darkly, Angel threw his arm around her and resumed their walk to Buffy's house. He had to get this over with soon. They continued to walk in silence, and as they turned down Buffy's street, Angel saw Xander in the distance.

A stream of curses ran through Angel's mind that would have made the toughest sailor blush.

Xander finally saw right was in front of his face and noticed them. He immediately began to run toward them. "Hey guys!" he greeted as he walked towards them. He looked at Angel. "Man, where've you been? You gotta go find Buffy. She's at her place stocking—"

Angel didn't even break stride as he punched Xander in the face, knocking him out with the blow.

For the first time since the charade had started, Angel didn't feel the least bit repentant. "That guy just bugs me."

* * *

><p>Buffy froze when she heard the knock on the door. Hastily, she began throwing things into her bag. It was all for show, but she couldn't resist.<p>

Holy water.

Stakes.

She heard Angel comment on her mother's hair.

Crossbow.

More Holy water.

More Stakes.

She heard their footsteps on the stairs.

A bigger crossbow.

Arrows for both crossbows.

She heard her door open.

"Knock, knock," Faith said as she entered the room.

Buffy put on a fake expression of relief. "Where have you guys been?"

"Been looking for you," Angel said and Buffy fought not to tense as he came towards her. She knew that at the moment he was pretending that he was himself. A show for her. It was almost more uncomfortable than him pretending to be Angelus. "Good thing we found you before we left," he continued as he kissed the top of her head. Buffy didn't know if it was all a part of the charade or if he was trying to reassure her.

"We got the books," Faith lied.

"They're at the mansion," Angel explained. If he thought that playing this part was difficult with Faith, doing this to Buffy was a strike away from unbearable. He was hurting her. He could see it in her eyes, the pain she was hiding.

"We'd take 'em to Giles ourselves, but I think that strength in numbers is the way to go," Faith continued, oblivious to the duplicity in the air. "Come on."

Angel bent down and lifted the weapons bag. "Let me get those for you."

Buffy looked up at him and their eyes met for a moment. For a split second, both of them slipped. Buffy saw the tortured pain in Angel's eyes, just as Angel saw it in hers. But beneath it all was love, and that tendril of hope wrapped around their hearts.

Angel's mask melted back into place, as did Buffy's, and the charade continued.

* * *

><p>"Okay, let's get these books somewhere safe," Buffy said as they entered the mansion. Her nerves were a knot in her stomach. This was the part she truly hated. "Where are they?" she asked.<p>

"Actually, there's been a slight change in plan, Buff," Angel replied lightly, dropping all notions of 'pretending' to be Angel. All the warmth, all the love from his voice was gone. He was smug. He was arrogant. He was evil. He was insane. He was Angelus.

"Buff?" Buffy repeated, the fear in her voice not faked. "You just called…what's the matter with you?"

Angel fought the urge to throw the whole act to Hell and pull Buffy into his arms. "Nothing." Angel vamped out. "Matter of fact, I haven't felt this good in a long time."

"Angel?" Buffy's voice cracked, though she didn't mean for it to.

It was like half of her was present and half was in the past, six months in the past to be exact, when this was real. This was like one of her dreams where the past months had been nothing but a figment of her imagination, and now she'd woken up to the Hell she'd tried to escape.

Angel smirked, a cold chuckle escaping from him. Buffy tried to see through his façade. She tried to see past the mask, but she couldn't. Whether it was her anxiety or Angel's Oscar-worthy performance, Buffy just couldn't see through the mask. The horror that caused her body to shudder was real.

"Yeah," Angel grinned as Buffy pretended to make the connection. "I was wondering, where I do start? Card? Fruit basket? Evisceration?" he asked as he grabbed her arms in a hold tight enough to bruise.

Angel fought back the revulsion that coursed through him as he forced himself to tighten his hold even further.

"No," Buffy shook her head, tears pricking at the corners of her eyes.

At the sight of the moisture in her eyes, Angel's façade cracked everso slightly, but it was long enough for Buffy to see through to his pain that he was hiding. Buffy hated herself, but she took comfort in that pain.

That pain reminded her that this was all an act.

"Yeah, I know what you're thinking," Angel got back on his internal script. "Maybe there's some good still deep down inside of me that remembers and loves you. If only you could reach me," he mocked. "And then we have reality."

Buffy broke away from his hold, backing away. "I will kill you before I let you touch me." She glanced at Faith, looking panicked but determined. "Faith, we need to get out of here now."

Faith smirked. "Speak for yourself, B." Buffy didn't have to force a sad, disappointed realization to appear on her face at Faith's tone. "Me? I like it here."

Angel knew he was about to do the one thing he would always hate himself the most for. He growled sharply and Buffy turned to him.

He punched her, sending her to the floor.

Angel knew that she wasn't really unconscious, but he'd still had to put enough force behind the blow to make it appear to Faith as though Buffy had been knocked out. Buffy would probably bruise.

And it was Angel's fault.

But Angel didn't let any of this show. He merely turned to Faith. "One thing I learned about Buffy," he said with a sadistic smile. "She's so cute when she's sleeping."

Buffy remained limp on the floor, ignoring the dull throb in her cheek. She lay utterly still when Angel picked her up, but she could have cried at the gentleness with which he did so. He carried her for a few feet and she fought the urge to curl into his chest. He stopped suddenly, and Buffy knew that he'd reached the chains. She felt his hand caress her back as he sat her down, and Buffy knew it was his silent apology.

Buffy decided that it was time to wake up when she heard the clinking of the chains. She opened her eyes blearily. "Morning sleepyhead," Angel commented lightly as he pretended to chain her up. He placed the manacles around her wrists, but he didn't shut them. "You know what I just can't believe?" he continued. "All our time together and we never tried chains."

Buffy didn't know whether to laugh or not. She knew that half of that statement really did come from Angel and not 'Angelus.'

"Well, can't dwell on the past," Angel sighed dramatically. "Especially with the future we have planned ahead…"

"Bondage looks good on you B," Faith commented graciously. "The outfit's wrong, but hey!"

"You don't know what you're doing," Buffy told her truthfully.

"Really?" Faith questioned lightly. "Weird, because all of this just feels so right. Maybe it's one of those unhappy childhood things. See, when I was a kid I used to beg my mom for a dog. Didn't matter what kind—I just wanted, you know, something to love." Buffy glared at Faith as she paused to kiss Angel. Fury bubbled in her veins at both of them. "A dog's all I wanted," Faith went on. "Well," she amended. "That and toys."

Faith pulled back a sheet on the table, revealing the torture instruments from Angel's trunk.

"But mom was so busy you know? With the drinking and passing out parts of life that I never really got what I wanted." Faith scowled in remembrance but then looked at Buffy and smiled. "Until now."

"Faith, listen to me very closely," Buffy played her part. "Angel's a killer." It hurt her to say the words. "When he's done with me, he'll turn on you."

"She's right. I probably will," Angel couldn't stop himself from adding.

"Yeah?" Faith seemed unconcerned. "Huh. Guess we'll just have to keep you around for a while then." Faith moved closer to Buffy. "Before we get started, I just want you to know. If you're a screamer, feel free."

Time to start digging for information. "Why, Faith?" Buffy asked honestly. "What's in it for you?"

"What isn't?" Faith retorted. "You know, I come to Sunnydale, I'm the Slayer. I do my job kicking ass better than anyone. What do I hear about everywhere I go? Buffy." Buffy grimaced at the bitterness in Faith's tone. "So I slay, I behave, I do the good little girl routine. And who does everybody thank? Buffy."

"It's not my fault."

"Everyone always asks, 'Why can't you be more like Buffy?'" Faith continued on in her rant. This felt good. Look at Buffy now. She had nothing and Faith had everything. 'Bout time. "But did anyone ever ask if you could be more like me?"

"I know I didn't," Angel muttered.

"You get the Watcher. You get the mom. You get your little Scooby gang," Faith sneered. "What do I get? Jack squat. This is supposed to be my town!"

"Faith, listen to me!"

"Why?" Faith shot back. "So you can impart some special Buffy wisdom, is that it? Do you think that you're better than me? Do you? Say it!" Faith demanded. "Say your better than me."

"I am," Buffy replied evenly. "Always have been."

"Um," Faith glanced pointedly at Angel. "Maybe you didn't notice, but Angel's with me."

Oh, Buffy had noticed alright. She sure as hell had noticed.

"And how'd you get him Faith?" Buffy asked disdainfully. "Magic? Cast some sort of spell? Cause in the real world Angel would never touch you and we both know it."

Buffy fought not to smile as Faith backhanded her across the face. Her plan was working. She needed just a little bit more prodding.

"You had to tie me up to beat me," Buffy pointed out with a superior smirk. "There's a word for people like you, Faith—loser."

"Uh huh," Faith tried to seem unaffected, but Buffy saw through it. "You're just trying to make me mad so I'll kill you. I'm too smart for that. Stick around."

"For what?" Buffy asked casually. "The Mayor's lame Ascension? Like I couldn't stop it."

"You can't."

"I will."

Faith scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Keep dreaming. No one can stop the Ascension. Mayor's got it wired, B. He built this town for demons to feed on, and come graduation day, he's getting paid, and I'll be sitting at his right hand." Faith smirked, before adding. "Assuming he still has hands after the transformation. I'm not too clear on that part. And all your little lame ass friends are going to be Kibbles N' Bits." Faith's eyes were alight in smugness, and all Buffy felt in that moment was pity. "Think about that when your boyfriend's cutting into you."

"I never knew you had so much rage in you," Buffy admitted quietly.

"What can I say?" Faith grinned. "I'm the world's best actor."

"Second best."

Faith whirled to face Angel in surprise.

"Graduation day," Buffy repeated, dropping her façade with relief. "Think we missed anything?"

"I think we know everything she knows," Angel replied steadily, his eyes on Faith.

Buffy couldn't help but gloat a little bit. Just to get back at Faith for kissing Angel. "May I say something?" she asked with a smirk before easily pulling her hands free from the manacles behind her back. She showed off her un-chained wrists in front of Faith with glee. "Psych!"

"You played me," Faith mumbled disbelieving. "You played me!"

Suddenly, the Scoobies burst in, heading straight for Angel, wielding crosses. Giles even had a crossbow. While Angel was forced back by the crosses, Faith turned on Buffy, rage in her eyes. Buffy blocked the punch to her temple and returned one of her own, hitting Faith square in the nose. Faith used the momentum and spun around, swinging her leg out in an attempt to knock Buffy off her feet. Buffy knew this, however, and jumped, spinning. The heel of her boot connected with Faith's jaw, causing the dark-haired Slayer's head to whip to the side.

Buffy tried to capitalize, but Faith blocked her and the fight continued. Buffy tried to gain the advantage, but what Faith lacked in skill and technique she was making up for in unrestrained strength due to her rage. They were evenly matched at this point.

Eventually, both of them ended up on the floor wrestling. A glint of silver caught Buffy's eye just as Faith wrapped her hand around it. Acting quickly, Buffy shoved Faith away from her and reached back to the table of torture instruments and blindly grabbed a knife.

She spun back around and placed the blade at Faith's throat, just as she felt the blade of Faith's own knife against her neck.

"What are you gonna do, B?" Faith taunted, slightly breathless. "Kill me, you become me. You're not ready for that yet."

Buffy didn't respond. She didn't know if she could. Faith lurched forward, grabbed her neck and pulled her forward. She planted a smacking kiss on Buffy's forehead before shoving her back and fleeing the mansion.

Willow was immediately at Buffy's side. "Are you okay?" she asked worriedly.

Buffy didn't look at her best friend, though. Her eyes sought out a pair of chocolate brown eyes, and when she found them, she couldn't look away.

* * *

><p>Later that night, after a meeting the Scoobies explaining how the night's earlier events had all been an act and discussing the Ascension and the information their trickery had gleaned, Buffy made her way back to the mansion. She didn't hurry. It may have been cowardly of her, but she didn't want to face the confrontation she knew was to come. She and Angel would have to talk about tonight. They'd reopened wounds that had only just begun to truly heal. It had been painful on both sides.<p>

The mansion loomed in the distance, but Buffy kept her steady pace. One foot in front of the other.

Left.

Right.

Left.

Right.

Left.

Right.

Left.

Right.

Steady. No rush. She didn't want to rush. She wanted everything to slow down. She wanted everything to rewind. She wanted it all to be a dream.

Buffy almost laughed. This had all been her idea in the first place! She'd brought this upon herself.

It was just that, in theory, she'd known that this would be difficult. In reality, it had been so much worse.

Finally, she reached the door to the mansion. She let herself in and made her way into the main room. Angel was there of course, waiting for her. He was standing, his arms hanging limply at his sides, the most nonthreatening pose he could take without being overtly obvious.

They were both quiet for a moment as they stared at each other.

"How you doing?" Angel asked softly, and Buffy focused on the genuine love and worry in his eyes.

"Been better," she replied truthfully.

"Not hard to believe." Angel looked like he was searching for something to say. "You were a real soldier tonight, Buffy."

Buffy smiled weakly. "That's me," she agreed. "One of the troops."

"I know how hard it was for you."

"I really doubt that," Buffy returned without thinking, flinching at the obvious pain her statement caused Angel.

"Is there anything I can do to make it better?" he practically pleaded.

"I know you only did what I asked," Buffy said softly. "And we, we got what we wanted."

"I never wanted it to go that far," Angel replied regretfully.

"I know that," Buffy assured him quickly. "I know that, it's just, after…" Buffy trailed off, looking at him pleadingly and yet not knowing what she was pleading for.

Slowly so he wouldn't frighten her, Angel stepped towards her. When she didn't back away or try to stop him, he took another step, and then another until he was right in front of her. With all the love and tenderness within him, Angel reached up and cradled her face in his hands. Gently, so softly his touch was barely there, his hands slid down her neck, across her collarbone, over her shoulders, and down her arms. One hand came to settle at her waist and the other gently lifted her chin up with a finger.

He held her gaze for a moment before leaning in. He paused just before their lips touched, hesitating, giving her time to move away.

Buffy didn't move.

Taking that as permission, Angel touched his lips softly to hers. So light was the kiss that Buffy barely felt it, and yet it sent a shock through her. A warmth spread within her that was comforting and familiar.

Love.

Angel kissed her again, this time with more passion, and Buffy didn't fight him. She couldn't fight him. This was Angel, her Angel. The Angel that loved her, that moved her, that cherished her. He was not _him_. This was Angel. This wasn't a dream. This was Angel.

Her arms locked around his neck, and Angel took that as permission to go further. He gently prodded her mouth open and deepened the kiss. Buffy moaned, and Angel took it a step further, his hand slipping under her shirt.

Angel steered Buffy toward the couch, never breaking their kiss. He plopped down and leaned back, taking Buffy with him. He rubbed soothing circles on the bare skin of her back as he placed feather light kisses all over her face, her cheeks, her nose, her eyelids, her lips. All her weight lay on him, and Angel cherished the feel, but he didn't act on the desire within him. That would be too much for Buffy at the moment. She just needed to know that he loved her. That he was here, with her.

Buffy sighed, burying her face in his neck, breathing in his scent. It calmed her, reassured her. She felt like she was wrapped in a warm, safe cocoon. She was wrapped in Angel's love, and she drew from the comfort it provided.

They laid there together for hours, just Angel holding her, occasionally kissing her hair, her temple, any place he could reach. His hands were continually moving though, roving over every inch of her. It was comforting, his caress. Reassuring. Loving.

Finally, Buffy spoke. "You're not him," she stated.

"No," Angel agreed.

"You didn't leave me."

"No."

"You love me."

"Yes."

Buffy lifted her head off his chest and met his gaze. Angel ran a hand through her hair. "You still my girl?"

Buffy smiled. "Always."

* * *

><p><strong>And there you have it! Woo! That was fun! Like I said, I really love this chapter. It was fun to write both Angel and Buffy's POVs during the charade. I felt like we didn't get enough of what they both went through on the show. At the end, they only really focused on Buffy's feelings, and I felt that the experience tore Angel up just as much as it did Buffy, even though it wasn't as apparent. I think Angel's old enough to know that it was all an act. His age and experience really comes into play in that aspect I think, the ability to, in a twist of words from one very Special Agent Seeley Booth, "Put his heart in neutral and his brain into overdrive."<strong>

**At least, that's my thought.**

**So...review? **

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	31. Chapter 31

**A/N: Merry Christmas! Yeah, I know, I'm two days late with that greeting, but still! I hope all of you had a very merry Christmas! So, here's a belated present. Can you believe that there's only two more chapters after this? Ah! I know! I excited because after I finish this story, all of you know what happens next...**

**AISHB sequel! (insert squeal here)**

**Yes, yes, yes, be excited. Be _very_ excited because it's my best work yet.**

**Sooooo...on that note...let's get back on this story...**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Come on, Angel. It's not that bad.**_

**Angel: I can't believe you're doing this to me.**

_**Me: It's not like you'll be suffering.**_

**Angel: That's what you think.**

_**Me: But Buffy will be wearing this really pretty pink dress that's gonna get you all hot and bothered...**_

**Angel: Really?**

_**Me: Really.**_

**Buffy: Well, duh. That was the whole purpose of the dress.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 31<p>

"Please?"

"Buffy—"

"Please? Pretty please?"

"Buffy—"

"If you love me you'll say yes."

Angel frowned. "That's not fair."

"Life's not fair," Buffy smiled sweetly before she put on her best adorably-pathetic-pouty-face. "Please?" she begged.

Angel looked at her for a long moment, debating, or at least he was pretending to. Truthfully, he'd known his answer the first time she'd asked. Granted, it wasn't the answer he honestly wanted to give, but this was Buffy. Apparently, love truly knew no bounds.

Prom.

"Yes," Angel sighed in acquiescence.

Buffy squealed and launched herself into his arms. "Thank you, thank you!" she said quickly before giving him a smacking kiss on the cheek. "I won't even make you dance to the fast songs," Buffy promised as she pulled away. "But you've got to give me the slow dances," she stipulated. "That's a done deal."

"Hmm," Angel hummed as he pulled her closer and began to dance with her, turning in slow circles. "Like this?" he whispered in her ear.

Buffy sighed contentedly. "Yep."

Angel chuckled and spun her out of his embrace, causing Buffy to giggle in delight. He twirled her back into his arms and said, "You know, you should really let me teach you how to dance."

Buffy pretended to think. "I don't know…" she trailed off warily, though a teasing smile pulled at her lips.

Suddenly, Angel took a step forward with his left foot, causing Buffy to take the appropriate step back with her right foot. "Hey," Buffy complained although she was unable to fight a smile as Angel continued to step in what she recognized as an upside down 'L' pattern. "I can't waltz." Buffy giggled as Angel twirled her.

"Really?" Angel challenged as he brought her back to him. "Cause you're doing a pretty good job."

"What?" Buffy grinned as she mirrored his steps absently. It'd always been easy to follow Angel. "It's all in the leading."

"Is that a compliment?" Angel asked with a smile before lifting her up and spinning her around. He set her back on her feet and they were off again, dancing around the furniture in the main room of the mansion.

Buffy giggled. "Maybe."

"So," Angel grinned as he twirled her again. "What color is the dress?"

Buffy smirked. "Pink."

"I'm shocked."

"Yeah, you look it," Buffy teased as Angel continued to lead her around the main room.

"Do I get to see it?" Angel asked, his lips brushing against the skin of her throat.

"Um..." Buffy fought for coherency. "Well...maybe...no, no, you can't see until the night of."

"Bet I can change your mind," Angel whispered huskily in her ear before stopping the dance all together and capturing Buffy's lips in a searing kiss that made Buffy's knees weak.

Suddenly, Doyle and Cordelia burst through the door, causing Buffy and Angel to jump apart. Angel was wondering about the interruption (because it had better be damn important), while Buffy was more focused on why Cordelia was with Doyle.

"Sorry for the interruption," Doyle began apologetically. "We would have actually interrupted you sooner but…"

"We were afraid you two were getting groiny," Cordelia cut in, causing Buffy to blush and Angel to frown.

Buffy cleared her throat and looked at Doyle. She raised her eyebrows. "So what's so important?"

"Oh, uh, vision," Doyle tapped his temple. "Urgent. Needs immediate Angel attention."

"Where?"

* * *

><p>"The Box of Gavrock," Angel explained an hour later to everyone gathered in the library. He'd arrived at the airport just in time to question the vampire about the box that he'd just dropped off. Unfortunately, the vamp had gotten a little temperamental and needed to be staked. Angel hoped he'd gotten enough information.<p>

"Apparently it houses some great demonic energy or something that His Honor will chow down on come A-day," Buffy picked up where Angel left off, having demanded details as Angel had driven them to the meeting with the Scoobies.

Giles and Willow entered the library then, carrying what large pieces of paper. "What's that?" Xander asked.

"Maps and stuff," Giles replied as he spread the papers out onto the table.

"Plans for City Hall," Willow explained further. Angel had asked for them immediately once they'd arrived. "They were in the Water and Power mainframe."

"The box is being kept under guard in the top floor conference room," Angel said as he pointed at the specified place on the map. "There. That's all I got from him before I had to kill him."

"Hopefully it's enough," Wesley murmured as he studied the map carefully. "What's the plan?" he asked, looking directly at Angel instead of Buffy, who was usually the mastermind of most tactical plans. Buffy and Giles noticed, but didn't say anything.

"I figure we enter through the skylight," Angel said as he studied the maps further. "Buffy can come with me."

"Fun," Buffy piped up, although she was slightly put out by the fact that Angel appeared to be leading the meeting and not her.

"And there's a ladder on the east side of the building," Xander spoke. "Here," he elaborated, placing his finger on the map, tapping the little diagram.

"You'll have to do more than just take the box," Cordelia spoke up, causing everyone to look at her. "What?" she snapped defensively. "What good is having the box when someone can just take it back?"

Doyle's eyes lit up in understanding. "Brilliant plan!" he said with pride before turning to everyone else. "Isn't she brilliant?"

Wesley was nodding as he understood Cordelia's statement. "Cordelia's correct. We'll have to destroy it."

"It won't be enough to simply have possession of the box," Giles agreed.

Willow's eyes sparkled as she realized what she got to do. "Ooo, yay, down and dirty black magic," she said with a smile. "I can do that."

"No doubt the box itself will be protected," Wesley postulated, his eyes narrowed in thought.

Buffy looked at Willow, her eyebrows raised, a small smile pulling at her lips. "Looks like a job for a Wiccan girl. What do you say, Will?" Buffy asked. "Big time danger…"

"Hey, I eat danger for breakfast," Willow retorted easily.

"But oddly enough, she panics when faced with breakfast foods," Xander pointed out with a smile.

"Alright." Angel seemed to command the attention in the room. Fascinatingly enough, he found himself enjoying being the leader. "Let's go to work."

* * *

><p>Buffy crept along the side of City Hall alongside Angel and Willow. She supposed she should be concentrating on the plan to get the Box, but she just couldn't make her mind focus. Instead, she was remembering the Scooby meeting and the obvious role reversal.<p>

Angel had taken control. He'd manned the helm. He'd given out orders, he'd come up with the plan, and everyone had gone along with it. Cordelia had volunteered strategic advice and Wesley had just hopped onboard the Angel train too. And even though Buffy suspected that Cordelia's involvement had more to do with Doyle than her actual desire to help, the fact remained that she'd cared enough to offer her own opinion.

How did she feel about Angel being more authoritative? She had to admit that it was quite attractive. She did like seeing him take charge. Also, the Shanshu prophecy always lingered in the back of her mind. Slowly, Buffy was seeing the changes in Angel that would eventually make that prophecy reality. Buffy had always known that Angel was a hero.

However, a little part of her was miffed. Sunnydale was _her_ town. The Scoobies were _her_ Scoobies. She gave the orders. She was in charge. She made the plans.

Buffy figured that that was the Slayer in her because the part of her that was simply Angel's girlfriend was ecstatic for this progress.

Either way, Buffy and Angel needed to talk.

It was almost shocking when Buffy looked around and found that she was on the roof of City Hall and Angel was in the process of removing the skylight. Right. Time to focus.

Buffy dug into her backpack and produced the spellbook and the bag of salt that Willow needed to lift the spell surrounding the box. Willow took them with a smile before she turned the book to the required page and began to read in Latin. As she spoke, she poured the salt through the open skylight so that it rained down on the box below. What appeared to be a force field with a bluish hue became visible for a moment before it faded.

A big smile lit Willow's face. "Oh, yeah. I'm bad," she celebrated smugly.

Buffy couldn't help but smile in return. "Four stars, Will," she praised before adding, "now get going."

"I'm gone," Willow confirmed with a nod before heading back towards the fire escape.

Buffy watched her friend go and then turned back to Angel who was waiting with the harness. Giggling slightly at the Mission Impossible-like scenario, Buffy let Angel strap her into the harness. "Ready?" Angel asked once everything was set up.

Buffy nodded, focused on the task at hand. "Drop me."

"Never," Angel returned with a grin before carefully lowering her through the skylight.

After what felt like forever, even though in reality it couldn't have been more than a minute, Buffy's hands touched the box. "Got it!" she smiled triumphantly as she lifted the box off the table.

And then the alarms started going off.

Damn.

"Angel!" Buffy called worriedly when she wasn't moving.

"It's jammed!"

Buffy heard the sounds of approaching footsteps. "I'd very much like to come up please, Angel!"

"I know!"

She still hadn't moved and now there were two very angry vampires growling at her. Buffy smiled at them dryly, "I don't suppose you'd like to help me down?" The vampires growled menacingly. Buffy nodded to herself. "Didn't think so."

The vampires charged at her, but Angel dropped down right in front of them, crouched in front of her protectively.

Buffy resisted the urge to stick her tongue out at them.

With Angel's help, they managed to escape out the front doors. Buffy started to run left, but Angel snatched her hand and dragged her to the right. He pulled her down into some bushes, and Buffy tried to control her heavy breaths so she didn't give away their position.

The vampires burst out of the building and immediately began following the black van, containing Giles, Wesley, and Willow. Buffy sighed in relief, and Angel took her hand, quickly leading them back to the library.

* * *

><p>Buffy couldn't believe it. Once again, she cast her eyes around the library and her friends, looking for her favorite redhead.<p>

Once again, Buffy came up empty.

Willow was gone.

Captured.

And it was all her fault.

"How did you guys let…" Buffy couldn't think. "How did this happen?"

"We thought she stayed with you," Giles explained contritely.

"They must have grabbed her when she hit the ground," Angel theorized before looking at Buffy guiltily. "I'm sorry."

Buffy forced her mind to work. "Look, it's nobody's fault, okay?" She couldn't have everyone playing the blame game. "We just need to focus and deal." Buffy looked at Oz, her expression suddenly determined. "Oz, I won't let them hurt her, I swear."

It was almost as if Oz didn't hear her. He didn't even acknowledge her words. He simply continued staring at a spot on the wall.

"We go back," Xander proposed determinedly. "Full-on assault."

Giles frowned. "They'll kill her," he argued.

"If they haven't already," Wesley couldn't help but point out, though Buffy was shaking her head as he spoke.

"No, they know how important she is," she retorted. "She's too valuable as long as we have the box." Buffy took a deep breath. She hated the plan she was about to propose, but it was the only way to get Willow back safely. "We trade."

Wesley immediately balked. "We can't."

"No, it's the only way." Buffy told him, her mind already made up. She turned to Giles. "It's the only way, right?"

Giles was nodding. "It might well be."

"Look, we call the Mayor and arrange a meeting," Buffy began, but Wesley was still opposed.

"We have to destroy the box," he pressed.

Xander scowled. "I need a volunteer to hit Wesley."

"He has a point," Cordelia spoke up, having been listening the entire time. "I mean, according to Wes this box is the key to really putting a kink in the Mayor's evil plans."

"Are you made of human parts?" Buffy looked at Cordelia scandalized. "This is Willow we're talking about here! She's worth more than a damn box!"

Buffy turned on Wesley. "We'll find another way to take down the Mayor."

"For all we know there is no other way," Wesley argued, his voice rising.

"Then we'll _make_ one!" Buffy ground out through clenched teeth. She turned to Angel. "Back me up."

Angel hesitated. If he agreed to trade Willow for the box, he could potentially be agreeing to trading a thousand lives for one. Selfishly, he thought he already had too much death on his hands.

But this was Willow. Willow was Buffy's best friend. Buffy loved Willow.

And Angel loved Buffy.

Angel looked at Giles. "Make the call."

* * *

><p>"The whole place is locked down," Oz enlightened them all after tugging on a door. "Except for the front."<p>

Xander fought a hysterical chuckle. "Yeah, that really gives me that comforting trapped feeling."

"One way out means one way in," Buffy pointed out, her voice steely with determination. "I want to see them coming."

Giles had placed the call to the Mayor, who, of course, had graciously accepted the proposed trade. The eldest Watcher had hung up on the phone with mixed emotions. He was happy that the Mayor had agreed, not that he'd really been too worried. The box was too precious not to trade for Willow. It was just that the Mayor was…weird. No one that evil should be so…giddily happy.

Suddenly the lights went out, prompting Angel to take an unconscious step towards Buffy.

"Guess they're shy," Xander mumbled, trying in vain to see through the black.

Angel's eyes narrowed as he saw the Mayor, Faith, and Willow led into the cafeteria by two vampires. "I can see alright," he assured them calmly.

Now that Buffy's eyes had adjusted to the darkness, she could see fairly clearly. Both she and the Mayor stepped forward until they were within arm's reach. After a session of glaring at the other, the Mayor chuckled. "Well this is exciting, isn't it?" he chuckled again. "Clandestine meetings by night, exchange of prisoners…I, I just—I feel like we should all be wearing trench coats."

Buffy's eyes narrowed. She wasn't in the mood for theatrics. "Let her go."

"No," the Mayor shook his head with a smile. "Not until I have my box." He paused and seemed to look her over for a moment. "So you're the little girl that's been causing me so much trouble. She's pretty Angel," he said looking up at Angel who remained completely unaffected except for the slight narrowing of his eyes. "A little skinny," he said off-handedly as he sized Buffy up again. "Still don't know why it couldn't have worked out with you and my Faith. Guess you just have strange taste in women."

"Well, what can I say?" Angel retorted easily. "I like them sane."

Willow whimpered quietly as Faith tightened her hold on the young Wiccan's arm. "Angel," Oz warned, a slight pleading edge to his voice.

"Well," the Mayor sighed as he focused back on Angel and Buffy. "I wish you two the best, I really do. But if you don't mind a little bit of fatherly advice…I, uh, I just don't see that much of a future for you."

Buffy barely stopped herself from growling in frustration. She was tired of people telling her how her relationship was doomed.

"I just don't sense a long-lasting relationship," the Mayor continued. "And not just because I plan to kill you," he couldn't help but add. "You two have a bumpy road ahead."

_Probably, _Buffy agreed silently. _But we'll come out of it stronger._

"I don't think we need to talk about this," she said aloud, annoyed.

Of course, the Mayor completely ignored her. "God, kids you know? You don't like to think about the future. You don't like to make plans. Unless you want Faith to gut your friend like a sea bass, show some respect for your elders." By the time the Mayor had finished, his voice had a hard edge that belied his usual upbeat glee.

"You're not my elder," Angel pointed out coldly. "I've got a lot of years on you."

The Mayor seemed to take this in stride. "Yeah, that's another thing you'll have to contend with. You're immortal. She's not. I married my Edna May in '03 and stayed with her until the very end. Not a pretty picture," the Mayor shook his head. "Wrinkled and senile and cursing me for my youth. Wasn't our happiest time."

"And let's not forget that any little moment of true happiness and you go evil," the Mayor continued and every Scooby tried to keep a straight face so they wouldn't give the falsity away. "I mean, come on. What kind of life can you offer her? I don't see a lot of Sunday picnics in the offering. I see skulking in the shadows, hiding from the sun. She's a blossoming young girl and you're trying to keep her from the life she should have until it passes her by?" The Mayor made a show of looking outraged. "My God! I think that's a little selfish. Is that you're greater purpose?" he shook his head in disgust. "Make the trade," he ordered with a wave of his hand.

Angel grasped the box firmly in his hands at the Mayor's command, his instincts to keep it away from his enemy momentarily overcoming him. Slowly, he and Faith approached each other. With his free hand, Angel reached out and grabbed Willow by the arm as he placed the box in Faith's hands.

As soon as she felt the wood of the box touch her fingertips, Faith shoved Willow away from her and immediately retreated back beside the Mayor, clutching the box securely. "Ah! Pleasure doing business with you," he smiled congenially. "And do remember…love doesn't conquer all—especially immortality. Life sucks that way, pardon the pun," he chuckled to himself before turning on his heel and leaving the cafeteria.

* * *

><p>"So Faith was like 'I'm gonna beat you up' and I was like 'I'm not afraid of you' and then she had the knife, which was less fun a-and then…oh! I-I told her that you had made your choice, and that Buffy had made hers—"<p>

Giles interrupted Willow's excited ramblings with a patient smile. "This is fascinating, but let's get back to the point…you actually had your hands on the Books of Ascension?"

Willow's smile never faltered. "Volumes one through five."

"Is there anything that you can remember that could be of use to us?" Giles asked quickly, unable to hide his thinly disguised desperate hope. "Anything at all?"

"Well," Willow trailed off, her smile disappearing. "I was in a hurry and what I did read was kind of over-involved." Willow frowned. "If you ask me, _way_ over-written," she continued. "Actually, there were a few pages that actually looked kind of interesting but I didn't get a chance to read them fully."

Giles visibly sagged at this news, disheartened.

Suddenly, Willow's bright smile returned as she dug some folded pages out of her pocket and held them out to the Watcher. "See what you can make of them?" she offered with amusement.

A bright smile lit Giles' face before he took the papers and dashed off to his office. Wesley took a step after to follow him, before he turned back to Buffy. "Buffy, I'm sorry if I seemed rather…abrasive…earlier, I mean," he apologized as he glanced at Willow out of the corner of his eye.

Buffy smiled, accepting his sincerity. "It's okay," she assured him. She looked towards Willow and then towards Angel who looked to be on the verge of brooding. "It all worked out in the end."

_Hopefully, _she added in her head as she looked into a pair of troubled brown eyes.

* * *

><p>"Do I have to wear this thing?" Angel complained as he fiddled with his tie.<p>

"Stop that!" Buffy slapped his hands away and straightened the tie. She ran her hands over his shoulders and smiled at his appearance. "You clean up good."

Angel shrugged.

"You act like this is torture," Buffy said as they walked towards the gym.

"I'll add it to my list."

"You have a list?"

"Let's not talk about it."

"Okay, no torture-talk. I can do that."

Together, with Buffy on Angel's arm, they entered the gym and took a moment to take in the decorations. Buffy looked around. "Not bad," she conceded. "But I could have done better."

"I'm sure," Angel smiled.

"Buffy!" Willow squealed as she wrenched Buffy away from Angel to envelope her in a huge hug. Willow pulled back just as quickly and looked Buffy over. "You look so pretty!" she complimented with a wide smile before dragging Buffy away towards the dance floor.

Buffy turned back towards Angel with an apologetic smile, but Angel merely smiled back and gave her a reassuring nod.

Angel scanned the crowd and spotted the tables that were set up towards the far wall, and next to them he spotted Wesley and Giles nibbling on a few treats at the refreshment table. With a small smirk, Angel approached them.

Wesley looked up when he saw Angel. "Wow, how brave of you to endure the hormonal angst affair that is high school prom," he said dryly.

Giles scoffed. "Please, you have the emotional maturity of a blueberry scone," he said blithely, ignoring Wesley's affronted look.

Angel merely shook his head, a wry smile on his lips. After a minute or so, Oz joined him. "Everything cool?" the werewolf asked calmly.

Angel shrugged noncommittally. He looked at Oz. "How's prom?" he asked. "I'm too old to give a nonbiased opinion."

Oz nodded sagely in agreement. "Strangely affecting," he began thoughtfully. "I got all teared up when they played 'We Are Family.'"

"Is that a good thing?" Angel raised his eyebrows.

Oz debated for a moment. "It remains to be seen."

The sound of someone spitting and blubbering caused both Angel and Oz to turn. "Doyle?"

Doyle looked at the small cup in his hand in disgust. "What is this vile brew?"

Oz looked into the bowl. "Punch."

"That doesn't contain alcohol," Angel added as amusement danced in his eyes.

"What is the world comin' to?" Doyle shook his head, tossing the cup behind him. He came to stand by Angel. The Seer opened his mouth to say something else before he seemed to freeze, gawking at the entrance.

Angel and Oz followed the half-demon's gaze and saw what had drawn Doyle's attention—Cordelia.

"Isn't she lovely?" Doyle asked dreamily.

"Yeah, she's a real charmer," Angel said dryly.

It was like Doyle hadn't heard him. "Wonderful," he murmured.

Angel sighed dramatically before clapping Doyle over the shoulder, almost hard enough for the Seer to stumble. "If you like her, go ask her to dance," he advised.

"But what if she says 'no'?" Doyle asked worriedly, running a nervous hand through his hair. "I-I mean, there are so many ways this could go wrong…"

"Just ask her," Angel fought back a chuckle as he pushed a nervous Doyle towards Cordelia.

"Hey, you." Angel's attention was diverted as a certain blonde looped her arm through his. "Havin' fun hanging out at the punch bowl?" Buffy teased.

Angel just smiled; glad to see Buffy enjoying herself. "Yeah, you know, I actually thought about trying some."

"Really?"

"No."

Buffy slapped his chest playfully before a tapping on the microphone caused her to look towards the stage. The gym suddenly settled down and got quiet as everyone focused on a very nervous looking announcer who, with shaking hands, unfolded a piece of paper and began to give out the class awards.

Not even considering the mere possibility that her name could be called, Buffy contented herself with leaning her back against Angel's chest and letting his arms wrap around her waist.

"Um, we have one more award to hand out," Jonathan stammered self-consciously as he looked out at the entire student body. "Is Buffy Summers here tonight?" he asked as he scanned the crowd. "Did she, um…"

Buffy froze as the spotlight shined on her. and everyone near her turned to stare at her. _Crap, what did I do? _she thought nervously.

"This is actually a new category, first time ever," Jonathan continued. "I guess there were a lot of write-in ballots and, um, the prom committee asked me to read this," he explained as he unfolded a piece of paper and began to read…

"_We're not good friends. Most of us never found the time to get to know you, but that doesn't mean we haven't noticed you. We don't talk about it much, but it's no secret that Sunnydale High isn't really like other high schools. A lot of weird stuff happens here…"_

Jonathan was cut off as students from the crowd shouted particular incidents that caused Buffy to take a trip down memory lane.

"Zombies!"

_That was fun…_

"Hyena people!"

_Whoa, Xander…Angel gave me his jacket around then…_

"Synder!"

Buffy couldn't help but crack a grin at that.

_"But, whenever there was a problem or something creepy happened, you seemed to show up and stop it. Most of the people here have been saved by you, or helped by you at one time or another. We're proud to say that the Class of '99 has the lowest mortality rate of any graduating class in Sunnydale history."_

The crowd erupted into applause, causing Buffy to blush.

"_And we know at least part of that is because of you. So the senior class offers its thanks and gives you, uh, this…"_

Jonathan suddenly produced a multicolored, glittery, umbrella-like trophy. "It's from all of us," he explained as Buffy stared up at him in shock. "'Buffy Summers, Class Protector.'"

Numbly, but with a growing giddiness in her bones, Buffy walked up onto the stage and accepted her award. She could feel Angel's eyes on her as the entire time, and fought not to look out at the crowd. She smiled at Jonathan who returned her smile shyly, handing her the trophy. Buffy took her little treasure and returned to Angel's arms immediately.

"Look at my little toy surprise," she grinned as she held it up.

Angel returned her smile and took the trophy, handing it to Giles. "I'm proud of you," he murmured in her ear. "I'm even gonna ask you to dance," he added as a slow song came on.

Buffy giggled as Angel led her out onto the dance floor before pulling her to him. Angel's hands settled at her waist. and Buffy's hands wound around his neck. With a small, indulgent smile, Buffy buried her face in Angel's chest, a content sigh escaping her.

Together they rotated in a slow circle, and Buffy closed her eyes, breathing him in and soaking up the moment. "So how's prom?" Angel asked after a few minutes.

Buffy pulled away to look up at him with a grin. She reached up on her tiptoes and placed a chaste kiss on his lips. "Perfect," she replied, a happy laugh escaping her. "I finally got one normal high school experience."

Angel chuckled, and they continued to dance. However, a certain couple caught his eye. "Well would you look at that," he murmured dryly.

Buffy followed his line of sight and took in the picture of Cordelia and Doyle swaying to the gentle beat. She couldn't help but laugh lightly at Doyle's obvious nervous glee. He was obviously considering this moment a glorious one of triumph.

"What a pair," she finally mumbled with a shake of her head.

Amusement lit Angel's eyes as he looked pointedly between himself and Buffy. "You're one to talk."

"Oh, please, we're completely different," Buffy said playfully. "We're supposed to be sworn enemies. After all, you're a vampire. I'm a vampire slayer…sorta ironic."

"Just a little," Angel said with a smile as his kissed her hair.

Buffy couldn't stop her mind from recalling the Mayor's words to the two of them. "What we have," she began. "No one understands."

"Nope."

"The Mayor doesn't know a thing about us," Buffy said with a small smile.

Angel's lips twitched as he fought a grin. "Well, he's evil."

"Big time." Buffy rested her hand against Angel's chest again, her knowing smile still lingering. "He doesn't even know what a long-lasting relationship is."

"Nope."

"Probably the only lasting relationship he's had is with evil."

"Yeah."

"Big, stupid, evil guy." Buffy laughed as Angel suddenly twirled her. "We'll be okay," she said once she was in Angel's arms again.

"We will," Angel agreed before capturing her lips in a heated kiss.

When they broke away, Buffy had to smile. "And you know what?" she joked as they continued to dance. "That whole conversation I barely stopped myself from singing 'I know something you don't know!'"

"I still can't believe they haven't figured out that my soul is anchored," Angel shook his head.

"Yeah," Buffy agreed. "I mean, could you imagine all the sexual tension if it weren't?"

"Unbearable."

"Totally."

* * *

><p><strong>Yes, yes, I know. I'm not too thrilled with this chapter, but I couldn't skip prom and I didn't want to dictate an entire chapter to it. The actual dance itself would have been the only part of the episode I could have used anyway since Angel and Buffy have actually already had the 'break up' convo earlier in this story. And then I just didn't like the whole creepy rapid dog thing...it just didn't float my boat. So, hence this chapter and the way it was done. :D<strong>

**So...only two more chapters to go! "Graduation Day Part One & Two" comin' up!**

**And guess what? Only 5 more days until the AISHB sequel! Chapt. 1 "Heartthrob Part One" will be up Jan. 2. :)**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	32. Chapter 32

**A/N: Alrighty! Here we are! The last episode people! Only one more chapter after this! Wow! I've gotta say thanks to everyone who has reviewed. You guys are awesome and I'm constantly astounded by the amouth of feedback I get. I'm well aware that a fic getting over a hundred reviews is a feat...so for me to get over 500 is utterly spectacular. Thank you, truly. :D**

**So...let's get on with it, shall we?**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Alright! Let's go guys! Last episode, we've gotta make it good!**_

__**Angel: I'm gonna be in pain, aren't I?**

_**Me: (laughs nervously) Angel, you know I love you...why would you think I'd make you suffer in dreadful agony?**_

**Angel: Dreadful agony? I thought you said you loved me!**

**Angel from AISHB world: Hey, suck it up. In my universe, she had me tortured by a hell god, and then she went and killed...**

_**Me: Angel! Don't ruin it! You'll like, I don't know, mess up some sort of timeline and disrupt the future!**_

**Angel from AISHB world: You do know that I'm not real right? And neither is the other me.**

_**Me: Angel, trust me. Somehow, someway, in some world...you exist. You HAVE to exist. My sanity depends on it.**_

**Giles: She does realize that as she's typing this, she's essentially talking to herself. **

**Buffy: Yeah, I mean, she does decide what we're going to say...**

**Xander: Because really, what sane person talks to fictional characters?**

_**Me: You're real! All of you! Real I tell you!**_

**Willow: Yep. She's crazy.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 32<p>

"Oh, I'm gonna miss her," Willow lamented with a smile as she watched Harmony walk away.

Buffy raised her eyebrows dubiously. "Don't you hate her?"

Willow's smile didn't falter as she walked through the halls of Sunnydale High with Buffy. "Yes, with a fiery vengeance," she agreed before elaborating. "She picked on me for ten years, the vacuous tramp! It's like a sickness, Buffy," Willow explained. "I'm missing everything, even P.E."

"I think it's contagious," Buffy replied as she looked around at the students that passed them by. "The whole senior class has turned into the 60s, or at least what I would have imagined the 60s to be like without the war and the hairy armpits."

Willow frowned. "You don't feel it?"

"No, I don't." Buffy shook her head. "I guess I'll miss stuff, but I just don't get the graduation thing. I mean, you get a piece of paper and nothing changes. I don't even think I'm gonna go," Buffy added as an afterthought.

"Trusty old soda machine," Willow cooed as she caressed it affectionately. "I push you for root bear and you give me coke." Suddenly, Buffy's words fully registered in Willow's mind. She turned to the slayer. "What do you mean you don't think you'll go? Why not?"

"Ascension," Buffy explained. "Mayor becoming a demon, snacking up on the populace—I was planning on fighting him."

"You can't do both?"

Before Buffy could answer, Xander joined them. "Both what?" he asked curiously.

"Go to graduation and fight the Mayor," Buffy enlightened.

"The Mayor?" Xander repeated, his brows furrowed in confusion. "Wait, didn't you guys hear?"

"Hear what?"

"Guess who the guest speaker is," Xander suggested wryly.

Willow's eyes lit up. "Siegfried?"

"No."

"Roy?"

"No."

"One of the tigers?"

"Come out of the fantasy, Will," Xander said seriously, though his eyes still held a smidge of amusement.

"I don't believe this," Buffy said quietly. She was shocked and yet she wasn't.

Xander knew that Buffy understood. "Lends credence to my whole 'I'm gonna die' theorem, doesn't it?"

"The Mayor at graduation?" Buffy shook her head. "A hundred helpless kids to feed on…" It was a perfect opportunity. "Got any other surprises for us?"

* * *

><p>Buffy sat on the table in the library, looking at the newspaper headline, a frown marring her face.<p>

"_PROFESSOR FOUND MURDERED" _dominated the front page.

Buffy stood and approached Giles and Wesley, who were busy fencing. It really had been quite funny to see Wesley handle a sword for the first time a few weeks ago, but now, with a little (a lot) of help from Angel and the occasional input of Giles (like now) Wesley wasn't half-bad.

Silently, Buffy held up the headline, catching Giles' attention though he didn't stop fencing.

"Faith," Buffy accused surely.

Still, Giles frowned. "You're sure?"

"One of her pieces." Buffy was sure of it. "I recognize the brushwork."

Giles took the newspaper from Buffy to look it over for himself while he absently continued to parry Wesley's attacks. "Brutally stabbed," he read. "Mr. Wirth, visiting professor of geology—there's nothing in here that bellows motive," Giles frowned.

"Random killing, perhaps?" Willow suggested as she entered the library, catching the tail-end of the conversation. "Fit of rage? Everyone does seem to be going a little bit mad these days. Faith has something of a head start."

Buffy shook her head. "No," she disagreed. "Doesn't read. Looks more like homework."

"You hate homework." Buffy looked up as Angel came to stand beside her. He looked at the paper in Giles' hands. "May I?" he asked.

"Of course." Giles was slightly startled by Angel's sudden appearance. He hadn't heard him come in. "Um, here," he held out the newspaper.

Angel looked over the article quickly, his forehead creasing as he thought. "Looks like tying up loose ends," he said after a minute, handing the paper back to Giles.

"You think the professor knew something?" Wesley asked, slightly out of breath from sparring.

"He either had something or knew something," Angel replied with a surety that belied centuries of experience.

"Then I wanna know too," Buffy declared firmly. "The Mayor's trying to hide. I say we go seek."

"Then we'll go to the apartment," Angel decided. "Tonight."

Buffy looked up at him with a fond smile. "I love it when you take charge."

"Be careful," Giles cautioned. "If Faith shows up…"

"She's nothing me and Angel can't handle," Buffy shook off his worry casually. "Besides, I don't think she'll show. It's not her style. Been there, killed that—she's not one for follow-up."

"Nonetheless," Giles stressed. "She has you at a disadvantage, Buffy."

"What? Because I'm not a crazy person or that I don't kill people?"

"Both," Angel answered before Giles could, looking at Buffy seriously. "Don't let your feelings about Faith interfere with your work."

Buffy frowned. "Stopping Faith is my work. Take a beat to love the synergy."

"Faith is a footnote," Willow argued calmly. "Our priority is the Ascension."

"Easier said than done," Xander interrupted as he entered the library, Anya trailing along after him. "You guys wanna know about the Ascension?" he asked. "Meet the only living person who's ever been to one."

* * *

><p>Buffy and Angel walked towards the mansion in silence, each of them mulling over everything that they'd learned from Anya. "So," Buffy said after a while. "How does it feel to know that you're technically not a demon?"<p>

"Can't say that it matters much," Angel replied with a shrug. "Doesn't detract from what I've done."

"Okay, what's the dramatics?" Buffy pulled him to a stop. "You've been brooding."

"I always brood."

"More than normal."

"Maybe I'm just practicing."

Buffy frowned and crossed her arms over her chest, waiting. Angel sighed and looked heavenward for a moment before he looked back at Buffy. "This isn't something we should talk about here."

"Why not?" Buffy retorted easily. "What's so important that it needs a special venue?"

"Buffy, please," Angel pleaded quietly. "Not here."

His tone combined with his words caused panic to flare in Buffy's chest. "Angel, you're scaring me."

"Let's go inside," Angel said, taking her hand and leading her to the mansion. Once they were through the doors, Buffy immediately withdrew her hand and went straight to the main room. She stared into the unlit fireplace, analyzing the black scorch marks that licked up the back.

"Buffy…" Angel began, but Buffy cut him off.

"Just say it," Buffy demanded, spinning around to face him. Angel hesitated, and Buffy jumped at his pause. "You're leaving, aren't you?" she accused. "You're leaving me."

"No," Angel shook his head. "I'm not leaving you."

"But you _are_ leaving," Buffy clarified and Angel nodded.

"Yes."

"Why?" Buffy asked. "Because Doyle said so?"

"No." Angel closed the distance between them. "Look, Buffy, I've been thinking about this for a while—"

"—without telling me"

"I don't have to tell you everything," Angel retorted sharply. "Will you just stop being a brat and listen for a minute?"

"Oh, that's what you think of me?" Buffy's eyes flared brightly in anger. "I'm a brat?"

"Right now?" Angel raised his eyebrows. "Yeah, you are."

Buffy scowled and turned away from him, but Angel grabbed her shoulder and spun her back around. "Look, just listen to me, okay?" he asked. "I wasn't going to tell you about it while I was still on the fence about it, alright? What good would that have done? You would have just been worried about it, and you have enough to worry about at the moment."

"But this is a big deal, Angel," Buffy replied evenly, her anger still present. "This is you _leaving_. Why? Because this town isn't big enough for the two of us?"

"Not anymore," Angel said calmly, trying to impart his calm to Buffy. This would be so much easier if they both kept their tempers under control.

"Seriously?" Buffy deadpanned. "That's your reason?"

"Not completely, so will you just shut up and listen?" Angel asked exasperated.

"Fine," Buffy snapped before stalking over to the couch and plopping down. She folded her arms across her chest and glared at him. "Talk away."

Angel took an unnecessary breath, reminding himself that one of the reasons he loved her was because of her youth and innocence. Sometimes he forgot that with that came teenage petulance.

"I came here because Whistler asked me to," Angel told her. The fact that he also happened to be in love with her was part of the reason, too, but that wasn't the point he was trying to make at the moment. "My job was to look after you, to help you with your Calling."

"So you're saying that I don't need your help anymore?" Buffy asked incredulously. "Of course I do!"

"It's nothing you can't handle by yourself," Angel replied softly. "Buffy, my time in Sunnydale is up. This is _your_ town, _your_ calling. It's time for me to find mine."

"I want to atone for what I've done," Angel explained, coming to sit beside her, taking her hand in both of his. "You're partly to blame for that," he added with a small smile. "Watching you the past three years, fighting for the good in the world—building up instead of tearing down—you inspired me, Buffy."

"I've wallowed long enough, bemoaning everything I've done," he continued dryly before becoming serious once more. "I want to do something about it, and to do that I need to leave. My redemption doesn't lie here."

Angel's impassioned speech took Buffy's voice away. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out. "Where will you go?" she finally managed to ask.

"L.A.," Angel answered quietly. "That's what Doyle seems to think, anyway."

"City of Angels," Buffy said with a wry smile. "How poetic."

"Fate's never been that creative."

"Definitely not." Buffy looked down at their clasped hands. "When will you leave?"

Angel hesitated. "After graduation."

"Assuming we live through it."

"Assuming we live through it," Angel repeated in reply. "But we will."

"And you'll leave."

"Yes."

Buffy sighed. She did _not_ need this now. The mere idea of Angel leaving hurt her, and she didn't want to imagine what his actual departure would do to her. He'd become such a figure in her life, she didn't know what to do if he weren't with her.

"But what will I do without you?" Buffy asked, cursing silently when her voice broke.

"What you've always done." Angel gave her hand a gentle squeeze. "Besides, it's not like I'm just gonna disappear and sever all contact. That would be the stupidest thing I could ever do," he chuckled. "Buffy, I need you. I'm gonna come back and visit."

"And I can go to L.A.," Buffy nodded to herself, a plan already forming in her mind. "I can call you too."

"If you wouldn't mind," Angel teased with a grin before kissing her lips. "Because," he explained before kissing her lips again. "I…" Kiss. "Need…" Another kiss. "You…"

"Hmm," Buffy hummed as Angel's lips continued down her throat. "Now?"

"And forever."

* * *

><p>"Ow," Angel complained as he stumbled through the doorway of Professor Wirth's apartment.<p>

"Stealthy," Buffy praised dryly as she searched through the papers in the boxes on the floor.

"Not my best entrance," Angel agreed as he made his way towards her. "I think they're mopping the halls," he defended himself before glancing at the papers Buffy held in her hands. "What's that?"

"A report," Buffy answered. "Excavation of an old lava bed," she explained as she skimmed over the document. "Guy was a volcanologist or something…"

Angel frowned. "Anything in there that connects him with the Mayor?"

"I'm looking over it, but the only thing I understand is the commas," Buffy sighed in momentary defeat. "I'll have to give them to Giles—see what he can make of them."

"Anything else that looks important?" Angel asked as he looked around the apartment.

"Nah, I think this is good," Buffy said as she picked up the box.

"Here, I'll get it." Angel took the box from Buffy before she had the chance to argue.

"You do know I have superpowers, right?" Buffy asked as they left the apartment. "Among them is super strength. I can carry a box."

"Can't I just do something nice?" Angel returned as his eyebrows rose in question. "I was raised in the age of chivalry, you know."

"You weren't very chivalrous at the time," Buffy pointed out.

"I'm atoning," Angel said with a smile.

"Right," Buffy tried to smile, but she figured it turned out to be more of grimace by the way Angel frowned.

"I'm sorry," he apologized.

"No," Buffy shook her head as they began to walk across the street. "It's just—I guess I need to get used to the idea. You kind of sprung it on me…caught me a little off-guard."

"That, and I'm already missing you," she added with a small smile while she fought back tears.

Angel sighed, letting the box drop to the pavement. He put his hands on Buffy's shoulders before trailing them down her arms lightly. "Hey, none of that," he pleaded gently. "It's not like you're gonna live life without me—"

A whistle of an arrow filtered through the air before it struck Angel in the back, causing him to stumble forward. "Angel!" Buffy cried in shock, her arms immediately going around him as she supported more than half his weight.

Angel sucked in a sharp breath. "Ow, I forgot how much this hurts," he complained with a wince.

Buffy didn't know whether to laugh or cry at his poor joke. "Come on. Let's get you out of here."

* * *

><p>"There," Giles said as he clipped off the majority of the arrow shaft that protruded from Angel's back.<p>

"Okay." Buffy blew out a stream of air before looking up at Angel. "Ready?" she asked as she grabbed the arrow point.

Angel nodded, knowing that saying 'no' wouldn't make a difference. "Yeah."

"On three…" Buffy began.

_She'll do it on one_, Angel thought knowingly.

"One." Buffy quickly pulled the arrow out, wincing along with Angel.

Angel let out a shaky breath. He tried to ease Buffy's worry. "I knew you'd do that," he smiled faintly.

"Not too much blood here," Giles noted.

"I heal pretty fast," Angel said by way of explanation. "I should be alright."

Buffy began to swab the exit wound on Angel's chest with alcohol. "I'm just glad that Faith is such a suck shot."

"You sure it was her?" Giles asked, although he knew that it was more than likely.

Buffy scowled. When she finally caught up to Faith, heads were going to roll. "Well, I've narrowed down my list of one suspect."

Silently, Buffy began to bandage Angel, lightly caressing his chest as she went. She tried not to think about how close she'd been to losing him. She _couldn't_ lose him.

"Fascinating," Wesley mumbled, causing Giles to look up.

"What?"

"It seems our Mr. Wirth headed an expedition in Hawaii digging in old lava beds near a volcano," Wesley explained as he looked through the reports in the file box that Buffy had brought.

"I'm not fascinated yet," Buffy said slightly agitated. Wesley was talking about volcanoes instead of focusing on the fact that Angel could have died. _Died_.

"He found something underneath," Wesley divulged. "A carcass, buried by an eruption."

"A carcass?" Giles repeated, his brows furrowing as he thought.

"A very large one," Wesley elaborated with a small smile. He'd found it! "Mr. Wirth posits that it might be an undiscovered dinosaur."

Angel made the connection first. "A demon?"

Giles nodded to himself as he took in the new information. This was good. "Yes, that would be something that the Mayor would want to keep a secret," Giles said as the puzzle pieces came together in his head. "If it's the same kind of demon that he's turning into and it's dead, it stands to reason that after the Ascension he is no longer impervious."

Buffy, however, foresaw just a tinny problem. "Great," she deadpanned. "All we need is a million tons of burning lava. We're saved."

"Well, it's a start anyway," Angel pointed out as he got to his feet.

Buffy frowned instantly, moving to push him back into the chair. "Okay, you've been a real klutz today. You need—"

"Damn," Angel cursed as he felt his legs collapse underneath him. Fiery heat began to build within him, licking his veins. The pain was just as searing as it was sudden. Angel clamped his teeth together, fighting back a moan of agony.

He could hear Buffy beside him, but he couldn't understand her words. The pain seemed to block out everything, and he was devoting all his concentration to suffering in silence. Angel needed to tell them something though. He needed to tell them what it was.

But he was afraid that if he opened his mouth, he'd scream.

"It's poison," he managed to hiss through clenched teeth. "I can feel it."

_Understatement of my existence, _Angel thought with a wince.

Angel listened as Giles announced that he'd start running tests and that Wesley would call the Council. Angel wasn't sure quite what he thought about that, other than the fact that he knew it was a waste of time. The Council wasn't going to help him.

He heard Buffy next to him. He felt her fingers in his hair, trying uselessly to soothe him.

"You're going to be okay," he heard her promise.

Angel wasn't so sure.

* * *

><p>Buffy sat on the edge of their bed, helplessly pressing a cold, wet rag to Angel's forehead, trying to combat the heat that was obviously consuming him. She knew he was in pain, but he hadn't uttered a sound except for his short, ragged, unnecessary breaths.<p>

"It'll be okay," she told him, though she knew she was giving herself a pep talk at the same time. She saw Giles frown out of the corner of her eye, but she ignored it. "You'll be okay."

_You have to be_.

Buffy heard footsteps behind her and looked up at the intrusion. Wesley was frowning, and there was regret shining in his eyes. Buffy knew he didn't bring good news.

"Did you reach the Council?" Giles asked.

"Yes," Wesley replied, looking none too thrilled. "They couldn't help."

"Wouldn't," Buffy corrected knowingly.

Wesley didn't bother to deny it.

"Did you explain that these were special circumstances?" Giles pursued. "What about the Shanshu prophecy? Are they just going to ignore it?"

"I asked them about it," Wesley explained. "Actually, I did a lot more than ask. I demanded, ranted and raved…" he trailed off and looked at Buffy. "I'm sorry. I did try."

"S'okay," Buffy mumbled. Even though she'd known that the Council wouldn't help, she still felt the threads of hope she'd held in her heart snap. "Watchers are just arrogant, heartless bastards," she muttered venomously, surprising both Giles and Wesley. "Not you guys, of course," Buffy was quick to defend. "But I'm not taking orders from them anymore. This is the last straw."

"Right-O," Wesley nodded. "That's what I said, more or less. Actually, it was more."

Buffy looked up sharply. "You quit?"

Wesley smiled half-heartedly. "With as much pomp and circumstance as I could through a telephone."

"Thanks Wes." Buffy thought about trying to smile, but decided against it. Nothing could make her smile at the moment.

Even though it killed her to leave him, Buffy knew it would kill her more to continue to see Angel suffer. She looked up at Giles. "I'm gonna go check on Will and Oz," she said. "See if they've made any progress."

"I'll stay with him," Giles promised before she could ask.

Wesley wasn't about to leave, either. Angel was his first true friend. "We both will."

* * *

><p>"Finding the poison wasn't that hard," Willow explained to everyone that was gathered in the chemistry lab. "It's a mystical compound. Its name in Latin translates roughly into 'Killer of the Dead'—used on vampires."<p>

"And the cure?" Buffy asked hopefully.

Willow's face fell. "Well, there aren't a lot of instances of it being cured," she revealed hesitantly.

"But there are some?" Buffy wasn't about to give up.

"One or two," Willow admitted. "They're pretty vague…how is he?"

"Hold it," Oz interrupted, a slight hint of victory in his voice causing Buffy's attention to snap to the werewolf.

"You got something?" Xander asked quickly.

"I'm not sure," Oz hedged, not wanting to get their hopes up, including his own.

Buffy was tense with the suspense. "Be sure."

"Okay," Oz let out a breath he hadn't known he'd been holding. "Killer of the Dead, this is it. Here's the account of a vamp that walked away from it…"

"Does it talk about the cure?" Willow asked apprehensively.

Oz was silent as he hurriedly read through the story. He swore he felt his heart stop when he read over the answer to their problem. "Damn."

"Nothing?" Buffy assumed.

"No," Oz shook his head. "It's in here, but…"

Willow read over Oz's shoulder. "Wait, completely reversed the effects," she read, feeling the beginnings of happy relief rising within her.

And then she read on. "Oh," she breathed, now understanding Oz's words.

"What?" Buffy asked, growing more and more agitated.

"Come on guys," Xander tried to hurry them along. He didn't like seeing Buffy so upset. "The suspense is killing Angel."

"The only way to cure this is to drain the blood of a Slayer," Oz finally enlightened them.

Buffy felt her world stop. She couldn't think. She couldn't hear. She couldn't see. She was nothing for one long moment.

Then her brain started working again.

"Okay," she said calmly, knowing what she needed to do. "Good."

Xander looked at her like she was crazy. "Good?" he repeated incredulously. "What did I miss?"

"It's perfect," Buffy explained, sounding slightly detached. "Angel needs to drain a Slayer. I'll bring him one."

Willow frowned as she realized what Buffy's plan was. "Buffy, if Angel drains Faith's blood, it'll kill her."

"Not if she's already dead."

* * *

><p>Buffy stood in Faith's apartment, taking in the scene. Her sister Slayer was lounging casually on her couch, immersed in a comic book. The stereo was blasting, drowning out everything. Idly, Buffy wondered how she was even able to concentrate on the comic book.<p>

She cast a quick glance around the apartment. It was nice. Spacious, expensive—everything Faith would want.

Buffy flicked off the stereo. Enough looking around—it was time to do this.

Kill Faith, a human.

It went against everything she was.

But she'd do it to save Angel.

"Thought I'd stop by," she said, announcing her presence.

"Is he dead yet?" Faith asked as she rose nonchalantly from the couch, tossing away the comic book.

"He's not gonna die," Buffy said coldly. "It was a good try though. Your plan?"

"Uh huh," Faith admitted with a small grin. "Mayor got me the poison, said it was wicked painful."

Images of Angel's silent agony flashed through Buffy's mind, making her see red. "There's a cure," she replied, her tone belying nothing of her rage.

"Damn," Faith cursed absently. "What is it?"

"Your blood," Buffy answered as she slowly began to advance towards Faith. "It's not un-poetic, don't you think?"

"Come to get me?" Faith smiled mockingly. "Come to feed me to Angel? You know you're not going to take me alive."

"Not a problem."

"Well, look at you!" Faith chortled. "All dressed up in big sister's clothes!"

"You told me that I was just like you—that I was holding it in," Buffy reminded her quietly, seething as she thought of Angel's pain.

By now, Buffy and Faith were face to face.

"You ready to let go?" Faith asked with a slight smirk.

"Try me."

"Okay then," Faith acknowledged smugly. She'd been right all along. "Give us a kiss."

Buffy gave her a punch in the face.

The fight was on.

Punches were thrown, kicks were dealt. Glass was shattered. Furniture was obliterated.

The rage of both Slayers finally coming to a head…

Buffy spun sharply, the heel of her boot connecting with Faith's jaw. The force of the blow caused Faith to spin a full three hundred and sixty degrees. Buffy advanced on Faith, looking to capitalize and take the full advantage, but Faith wasn't having any of it. She threw herself at Buffy, sending both of them through the glass doors that led out onto the terrace.

Recovering from the fall first, Buffy clasped her hands around the cool metal in her pocket and quickly handcuffed herself to Faith. She wasn't going anywhere.

Faith lunged at Buffy so fast that Buffy couldn't avoid the dark-haired Slayer's fist. Buffy felt her lip split as her head snapped to the side, but she yanked on Faith's handcuffed wrist and threw her to the ground, letting herself fall on top of her enemy.

Buffy pinned Faith to the ground and then began to wail on Faith, her fists taking out their fury on Faith's face. She got in two or three good punches before Faith managed to throw her off. She grabbed a length of pipe beside her and rose to her feet, brandishing her new weapon.

"What's the matter?" Buffy snapped as she dodged a swing from the pipe. "All that killing and you're afraid to die?"

Faith growled and finally managed to snap the chain that handcuffed her wrist to Buffy's. They both squared off anew, and Buffy pulled out a very familiar knife.

"That's mine."

Buffy's gaze was hard. "You're about to get it back."

Both Slayers flew at each other, dodging and blocking each other's blows. Buffy lunged at Faith with the knife, but she missed, causing herself to be off-balance. Faith used this to her advantage and quickly had Buffy backed up against the low wall, pushing Buffy back so that she was halfway leaning over the side of the building.

"Man, I'm gonna miss this," Faith lamented absently, getting ready to give Buffy the final shove that would send her toppling over the ledge.

Suddenly, Buffy tore herself out of Faith's steel grip and plunged the knife into Faith's abdomen.

Both Slayers were shocked.

"Well, you did it," Faith congratulated, feeling the life ebb away from her. Was this how everyone she'd killed felt like? Had they been cold too? "You killed me," she said, pushing Buffy away from her and sending the blonde slayer to the ground with the last vestiges of her strength.

Faith climbed onto the low wall, turning back to look at Buffy. "Still not gonna help your boy though." No, Faith wasn't going to lose—not completely. "Shoulda been there, B. Quite a ride."

And then she let herself fall over the edge.

* * *

><p><strong>And there we go! Wow, only one more chapter! Ah! You know, I was looking back through this story and I saw where I was so proud of having already written 18 of 25 chapters of this story. Ha. Look at me. I'm gonna finish at Chapter 33.<strong>

**Can't say I don't overachieve. ;)**

**So...guess what? 3 more days until the sequel to AISHB. Wanna know the title? "Love's Gift."**

**Lots of love,**

**ArthursCamelot**


	33. Chapter 33

**A/N: Ah! Here we are yet again! The end to another story! Oh, my…I can't believe it! Personally, I just glad that we survived it. I mean, think of what all we've been through on this rollercoaster…**

**At the beginning, Angel was always running away and Buffy was always in tears. Xander was a jerk. Giles was confused. Willow was sneaky. Oz was mello (yeah, surprise, surprise). Joyce just didn't know _what_ to think…**

**And then there was all this angst…and then more angst…and still more angst, which, in turn, culminated in—you guessed it—more angst.**

**And _then_ the Watchers came…and _then_ Buffy, Giles, and Angel went to London for the Review…and _then_ the Watchers tried to kill Angel TWICE…and _then_ they subsequently failed TWICE…and _then_ we met Wesley…and then we learned about Shanshu…and then we finally made it back to Sunnydale and continued with S3…**

**I think we all deserve a beer (if you're legal…which, I'm not, but I can drink in spirit).**

**Of course, I would have never survived if it weren't for my reviewers. You guys are so fantastic and you have no idea the sheer amount of influence you have on me. You control my moods. And because you're all so awesome, I'm usually all smiles! So thank you, thank you, thank you!**

**Because you are so awesome, I think you guys deserve some recognition. :D**

**So, a big THANK YOU to: sweetheart72650, Sinagled, bangelforeverandalways, ba2006, PiNkGuItArGiRl99, angel098756, PrincessBuffy, demondog666, Brandi Rochon, TheLadyBlackDove200, Tayler, Twilight Phantom Dragon, thetvgeneral, melody's muse, VampiricBloOdyRose, Kissin Concern, xxdawnbreakerxx, dyn, Sweetmaj010, DLillith21, philly cheese dude, BrucasBangelBrylan, Jeremy Shane, Angellufy, Carah, Racel-xox, ESsmich, nurjen08, mendenbar, TwoBecomeOne, Taaroko, Alkeni, Labyrinth01, samsbk, Thalia Grace DaughterofZeus13, EmeraldWings90, klaegirl621, suzzywuz, Cowgurl4life, LiteratiLady, snowflake13300, Trendy-Vamp1991, Valjavertjinn, babysayitisn'tso, whatweareafreaidof, dark11krad, angelplusbuffyequals4ever, BS, sailor's delight, Dark Vizard447, angelrider93, jude1028, Kirrangelique, Liz, SharkGurl, the blur, xConcer3t3 Jungl3 5urf3r, Fabulouskiaa, BAsupporter, LadyElena17, AkishaDeMarco, Kurinju-sama, CF2, Breathe Breathe Breathe, Signora Ted, TIVA GSR FREEK, alwaysbatogether, Angel3333, The Purple Rose of York, Anne, ptitemel38, Lady Elena Bella Petrova, SMGbest, and WizardofallGenres!**

**Thank you, thank you, thank you! You guys are amazing and I love you for it. :)**

**And, alas, the final Random Disclaimer for _Eye of the Beholder_…**

**Random Disclaimer: (I don't own Buffy).**

_**Me: Okay, guys! Here we go! Look sharp, people! Graduation has arrived! The Mayor's goin' down!**_

**Mayor: Excuse me? And who just might you be?**

**Angel: She's ArthursCamelot, and you really don't wanna mess with her. Trust me.**

**Buffy: Seriously. You don't want to get on her bad side. I know from experience.**

**Mayor: (scoffs) Puh-lease…like a mere human girl can harm me…**

_**Me: Oh, but you don't understand. I may be a mere human girl, but I happen to be a mere human girl with a laptop and with a few simple strokes on my keyboard I can OBLITERATE you…within in seconds I can have you trapped in a tank filled with Bubonic Plague. Yeah, that's right, the Black Death! How do you like them germs?**_

**Mayor: (horrified) Flee!**

**(The Mayor is quickly surrounded by Buffy, Angel, and the Scoobies)**

**Mayor: (chuckles nervously) Um…parlay?**

**Xander: Parlay? Who ever thought of parlay?**

**Capt. Jack Sparrow: That would be the French.**

* * *

><p>Eye of the Beholder Chapter 33<p>

Pain.

Blinding, fiery agony.

Pain was all he knew.

Angel felt like he was burning. He imagined that his body was blackened with ash and soot. The sadistic fire wouldn't cease. It was merciless.

But aside from the searing pain, he only had one thought.

Buffy.

He knew he was going to die, and strangely enough, he didn't fear death. One would have thought, being immortal, that he would fear death, that he would think that he was above death, but he didn't. Death was a part of life. It was a paradox that no being was immune to.

Angel clung to his picture of her in his mind's eye. Yes, he knew he was going to die, but he wasn't going to go just yet. He needed to see Buffy in the flesh because he knew his feeble mind couldn't do her beauty justice. When he opened his eyes, he knew that his meek mental creation of her would pale in comparison to the real thing. Her hair would be even shinier, even more golden. Her eyes would be even brighter, hold even more sparkle. Angel needed to see her before he died.

He heard someone talking to him. It had to be Buffy. Angel forced his eyes open, and he swore he saw her sitting there by his bedside. She was wearing a tender, sympathetic smile. Angel knew he said something, but he couldn't remember what it was. Buffy frowned then, causing Angel to mirror the action.

It wasn't Buffy. The scent was all wrong. It was Willow.

Willow.

Not Buffy.

Angel tried to force back the pain induced haze that clouded his brain. He couldn't give into the delirium, not now. He had to see Buffy. He had to see her face before he died.

Willow left him then, and Angel was alone for a moment. Then he smelled it, _her_ scent. Vanilla and honey with a hint of roses. Buffy was here.

He heard her footsteps next. Angel wanted to lift his head, but any amount of movement seemed to stoke the fire that raged within him. Even blinking was painful.

Finally, though, finally he saw her face.

He was right. His mental image of her beauty didn't do her justice.

Buffy grabbed his hand and squeezed it gently. Her free hand went to his face, caressing his cheek. Angel fought not to close his eyes at her touch. He needed to see her.

"Buffy?" Angel needed to make sure that she was really here. "Is that you?"

Buffy smiled slightly. "It's me," she assured him quietly.

Angel tried to smile in return. "I didn't want…to go…without…seeing you…"

At his words, Buffy laid her fingers on his lips, preventing him from saying more. "Angel, I can cure you."

"It's okay," Angel tried to reassure her. "I'm ready."

"Angel, listen to me," Buffy said firmly, determination shining bright in her eyes. It caused alarm bells to ring in the back of Angel's mind, but he didn't know if he could trust his instincts at this point. He was fighting back the pain induced delirium that was ever present in his mind. He needed to focus on Buffy.

"Sit up," she ordered firmly, and Angel struggled to comply, but he barely managed a few inches. The pain was unbearable and his strength was virtually nonexistent.

Death was coming.

"You're gonna live," Buffy said fiercely, looking deep into his eyes. "You _have_ to live."

Angel frowned. "What way?"

"Drink."

_Drink what?_

Buffy quickly threw off her jacket and tossed it aside. "Drink me."

Angel's world froze. Time ceased to exist. He stopped breathing. He didn't even feel pain.

_Drink me._

The phrase rolled around in his addled brain for all of three seconds before time resumed. His breaths were ragged and the pain was back full force. "No."

"It's the only way."

Angel shook his head adamantly. He was _not_ drinking from her. No. It was wrong. So wrong. He was horrified that she'd even consider it, angry that she'd even suggest it—terrified that he himself wanted to say _yes_.

"No," he told both himself and Buffy. "Get away from me."

_For both our sakes._

With strength he didn't know he had, Angel forced himself to his feet and out of the bed. He had to get away from her. He had to. He had to save them both.

Buffy's hand wrapped around his right arm. "It'll save you."

"It'll kill you," Angel argued back.

"Maybe not," Buffy retorted easily. "Not if you don't take it all."

_Not take it all? Not take it all? How could I __**not**__ take it all?_

She didn't know what she was asking. She didn't know what she was asking was impossible.

"You can't ask me to do that," he finally managed to speak.

"I won't let you die." Angel tried to ignore the desperation in her voice. "I _can't_." Angel couldn't look at her. Funny how just a while ago, the only thing he'd wanted was to see her face. "Angel, the blood of a Slayer is the only cure."

Angel tried to force his brain to work. He pain was beginning to overwhelm him.

Death was coming closer.

"Faith…"

A sheen of moisture glistened in Buffy's eyes. "I tried…I killed her…"

"Then it's over."

Angel tried to get away from her. Her scent was so close to him. It was enveloping him, her blood was so potent. He had to get away. Angel staggered away from Buffy, but he was unable to walk a straight line. He bumped into a wall, which caused him to bump into the back of the couch. He heard a crash as something broke against the stone floor, but he had no idea what it was.

And then she was in front of him again, gripping his shoulders. Her scent assaulted him again.

_Damn her._

"It is never over!" she argued passionately, determinedly. "I won't let you die! Drink!"

Angel felt himself swaying. Death was knocking on his door. He could feel it…but Buffy's scent called to him, and the monster within him rejoiced. It knew that the cure was right in front of him. It could smell the delicious elixir that would snuff out the fiery pain that raged within him. The end to his suffering was right in front of him. Offering herself, freely.

"Please…" he begged.

_Leave me. Get away. Save both of us, please._

Buffy couldn't believe it. He was going to let himself die. He had given up.

Suddenly, she felt angry.

Her fist connected with his temple without her permission. He looked back at her, shocked. A plan formed in Buffy's mind. If Angel the man wasn't going to take her blood—she'd just have to awaken the beast.

So she hit him again.

And again.

After the third punch, his demon finally broke through. Buffy grabbed him by the nape and forcefully drew his mouth to her neck. Her heart beat wildly within her chest, like it was calling to him, acting like a beacon. She could literally feel her pulse in her neck.

For a long second, they both stood there.

Pain.

Buffy stiffened when Angel's fangs punctured her flesh. She's been prepared for the pain. What she hadn't been prepared for was for her Slayer instincts to kick into overdrive.

Every fiber of her being screamed at her to throw Angel off her.

Buffy held him tighter.

Her muscles contracted and relaxed spasmodically as her all her strength seemed to be working itself up. It demanded to be used to fight her attacker.

Buffy held still.

Darkness began to seep into her vision as her legs gave out, and she fell to the floor. Angel toppled over with her, but his mouth stayed firmly attached to her neck. Buffy felt a tear slide down her face as she lost the feeling in the tips of her fingers and her toes—her life slowly leaving her.

Again, her instincts revolted at the idea of lying complacent, and again Buffy forced herself to stay still.

Coldness swept over her, and the pain lessened. She grew numb all over. Her limbs felt as though they weighed a ton.

Angel had yet to stop drinking.

The fear she felt was like a betrayal. She had faith that Angel would stop in time, but she still couldn't stop the icy tendrils of terror that eminent death evoked within her.

Buffy felt like she was drifting away. A peace washed over her, and Buffy relaxed.

Then there was nothing but blackness.

Slowly, Angel came to awareness. His first conscious thought was that the pain was gone, and for a moment that was all he could focus on. No pain.

He'd almost forgotten what it was like.

Angel's next conscious thought was Buffy.

Buffy…_oh, God_.

Angel immediately brought himself to his knees beside her. He tried to not think about how slow her heartbeat was or how shallow her breathing was to match. He tried to ignore what that meant.

"Buffy?"

She looked lifeless.

"Buffy!"

* * *

><p>Angel had never loathed himself so much as he did at the moment.<p>

His body was practically vibrating with the strength and power that Buffy's blood had given him. He felt like he could move mountains. He felt invincible.

He hated it.

Angel had just hung up with a very worried Giles. He knew that the Scoobies were all on their way, and Angel didn't know if he could deal with them at the moment. He knew that when they did show up, they weren't going to be too happy to see him alive.

Because all of them would know what that meant.

Angel didn't know who he was angrier with, himself or Buffy. He absolutely abhorrently loathed himself at the moment. How could he? How could he have drunk Buffy's blood to save himself? How, how, how? How could he have been so selfish? He could have killed Buffy.

Buffy. Angel had never been as mad at her as he was now. How could she have done it? How could she have mocked his most primal nature like she had? Forcing his demon to the fore, exposing her neck, forcing him to her pulse…

How stupid was she? What the hell had she been thinking?

Angel ran a hand through his hair. What were they going to do?

"Oh, my God! Sir! No!"

Angel looked up sharply towards the distressed voice.

"Somebody call security!"

With a jolt Angel realized that the voice came from Buffy's room.

Angel was in the room within a second. His eyes zeroed in on the Mayor and his hands that were cutting off Buffy's air. Red clouded his vision, and Angel grabbed the Mayor's shoulders and threw him away from Buffy.

"Don't do that!" he growled.

The Mayor stumbled but quickly regained his footing and got in Angel's face, seemingly undaunted by the rage that emanated from the vampire. "I _will_ do that," the Mayor seethed. "I will do that and worse," he promised as he looked over Angel's shoulder at Buffy. "Murderous little fiend! Did you see what she did to my Faith?"

Angel's eyes narrowed. "Hadn't any plans to weep over that one."

"Well, I'd get set on some weeping if I were you!" the Mayor threatened, appalled by Angel's lack of compassion and sympathy. "I'd get set for a _world_ of pain! Misery loves company, young man, and I'm looking to share that with you and your whore!"

The words were hardly out of the Mayor's mouth before Angel effortlessly threw him across the room. His body hit the glass of a window overlooking the corridor, shattering it into tiny pieces before he fell back to the ground, overturning an instrument laden metal table.

A low growl vibrated steadily in Angel's chest as he watched the Mayor get to his feet, unharmed. Two nurses ran into the room then, looking completely bewildered, but Angel didn't pay them any mind. He was too focused on the Mayor who was casually brushing the dust off his suit, a bought of chuckles escaping him.

He gestured to Angel knowingly. "Looks like somebody had been eating his spinach," the Mayor joked before looking towards the nurses. "No, it's okay folks. It's alright," he assured them. "The show's not over, but there will be a short intermission!"

The Mayor turned back to look at Angel who was breathing heavily, fighting the urge to destroy. "Don't miss the second act!" he said with a smile as he walked by Angel and out the door. "All kinds of excitement!"

Angel watched the Mayor leave. "I'll be there," he promised.

Once he was sure that the Mayor was gone, he looked toward Buffy, and was relieved to see the color returning to her face. She would be fine. Still, Angel could help but shake his head and sigh. What a role reversal. Not two hours ago, he'd been the one in the bed and she'd been the one watching over him. He moved to the bed, taking her hand and giving it a gentle squeeze. With his free hand he reached up and caressed her cheek.

"You stupid, stupid girl," he chastened lovingly before placing a tender kiss on her forehead. "When you wake up we need to talk."

* * *

><p>Nearly fifteen minutes later, Angel was sitting on the floor outside the door to Buffy's room, a silent sentinel. The doors across the hall burst open, and the entire Scooby gang advanced upon him. Doyle was there too, along with Cordelia and Wesley.<p>

Angel rose to his feet.

"How is she?" Giles asked immediately, worry dominating his expression.

"She's fine," Angel reassured him. "She's sleeping."

Oz looked at Angel, puzzled. "Well, you look alright, too."

Angel's eyes dropped to the ground as Oz's perception brought forth a round of wracking guilt that clinched his dead heart. He folded his arms across his chest, trying to ease the ache away. "Yeah."

"What happened?" Xander asked.

"When we left her, she was fine," Willow said confused. "Did Faith—"

"Faith's out of the picture," Angel interrupted her, still looking at the floor, unable to meet their gaze. "Buffy put her into a coma."

Xander took a deep breath, looking at Angel with suspicious eyes. "And?" he prompted.

"Buffy cured me," Angel admitted, forcing himself to look up and meet the Scoobies gazes. Xander was glowering at him, fuming. Not unexpected.

Giles, too, was glaring at him. "You fed off her."

"Yes."

"How much?"

Angel couldn't stop himself from dropping his eyes in shame. "She's gonna be alright."

"She won't be a vampire?" Willow asked, causing Angel to look up sharply.

"No," he denied quickly. "She didn't feed off me."

Xander shook his head. "Well, it's just good to know that when the chips are down and things look grim, you'll feed of the girl that _loves_ you just to save your own selfish ass!"

"Hey," Doyle frowned. "Can't ya see that he's just as torn up about it as you are? Ya pigheaded—"

"Enough, Doyle," Angel interrupted quietly.

"You better go, Angel," Giles advised, though his voice rang with command. "We'll watch over her."

Angel immediately balked at the idea. He couldn't leave her. "I don't want to—"

"The sun will be up soon," Giles interrupted coldly.

Wesley put a hand on Angel's shoulder. "He's right, Angel," he said as he tried to guide Angel away. "You need to get back to the mansion."

Angel sighed before giving in and letting Wesley lead him though the hospital. Once they were out of the hospital, Cordelia spoke, shocking them all with her words. "Well, that was rude!" she ranted. "I mean, seriously? What makes them so mightier than thou?"

Angel, Doyle, and Wesley all halted to gawk at the cheerleader.

"What?" she snapped defensively. "I can't have layers?"

"I didn't even think you liked me," Angel said slowly.

"Oh, I don't," Cordelia was quick to assure him, before she added hesitantly. "Not really, anyway. It's just that, well…" she trailed off, looking uncertain and vulnerable. "You and Buffy have that love that every girl dreams about. It makes me mad that everyone doesn't seem to appreciate it."

Doyle reached over a grabbed her hand, giving her a gentle smile. "Look at you, Princess. I knew you were beautiful inside and out."

Cordelia scoffed. "Oh, please, don't read into that. I just proved that I'm a good actress. All of you are beneath me."

They all resumed their walk to the mansion, no one commenting on the fact that Cordelia had yet to let go of Doyle's hand.

* * *

><p>Blearily, Buffy opened her eyes and took in her surroundings.<p>

_Ugh, hospital._

For a moment, Buffy let herself lie on the hospital bed so she could gather herself and sort through the garbled mess of thoughts that were running rampant in her mind. The last thing she remembered was Angel feeding off her. She didn't remember the trip to the hospital that had obviously taken place.

Where _was_ Angel?

Buffy looked around the room, expecting to see him, but her eyes couldn't find him. Fear shot through Buffy. Was he mad at her? Had he left? Had he really left without saying goodbye?

This was all the motivation Buffy needed to get out of bed. Quickly, Buffy swung her legs over the side of the bed and rose to her feet. She paused for a moment, blinking away the dizziness that the fast movement had caused, but once it passed she quickly found some clothes that Willow must have brought. Buffy threw on the clothes and was out of the room within five minutes of when she'd first opened her eyes.

Immediately, she went for the waiting room, thinking that perhaps Angel was there instead—hoping that he was there instead.

But when she reached the room, the one person she wanted to see most wasn't there either.

Buffy felt her breath quicken, but before she could speak, the Scoobies noticed her presence and quickly surrounded her, bombarding her with questions.

"Buffy!"

"Are you okay?"

"How do you feel?"

Buffy ignored them all, searching the room. "Is Angel here?"

All the Scoobies got quiet at her question, seeming reluctant to answer. It didn't escape Buffy's notice that both Giles and Xander were trying hard to hide their disdain. Giles was having much more success than Xander.

"He's not here," Oz finally answered her after a beat. "It got kinda sunny."

"I need everyone," Buffy told them seriously as her conversation with Faith filtered through her brain. She knew what she had to do. "Don't worry about Angel. I'll get him."

Xander frowned in confusion. "What exactly is up?"

"Buffy, are you sure you're alright?" Giles asked worriedly.

"I'm ready."

"Ready for what?" Willow asked.

"War."

"Um, wanna rewind?" Xander suggested. "Buff, you just got out of the hospital…"

"I'm fine," Buffy assured him quickly. "Look, graduation's comin' up fast. We need to be ready. We need a plan."

"Yeah, but Buffy—"

"We don't have time, Xander," Buffy interrupted. "Just get everybody together and meet me at the library in two hours, okay?"

"Okay."

Buffy nodded and began to walk out the doors, the Scoobies quickly following after her. "But, Buffy, wait!" Willow cried as she hurried toward her friend. "Where are you going?"

"To find Angel," Buffy replied as they walked out into the parking lot.

Willow frowned, before speaking hesitatingly. "Buffy, are you sure you want—"

"I love him, Willow," Buffy interrupted softly. "I knew what I was doing. I wasn't going to let him die."

Willow paused and stared at Buffy for a long moment, before she nodded. "Okay, then. Oz and I will give you a ride."

Buffy smiled slightly. "Thanks, Will."

* * *

><p>Angel was sitting in his chair, staring into the empty fireplace when Buffy found him. Cautiously, Buffy approached him. She didn't know how to proceed. What did she say? What did she do?<p>

Buffy placed a tentative hand on his shoulder, not trusting herself to speak. She relaxed slightly when Angel reached up and placed a hand over hers. He tugged on her hand gently after a moment, bringing her around to face him. Buffy crawled into his lap and wrapped her arms around his neck as Angel's arms encircled her waist. He buried his face in her neck, but Buffy didn't move away. She only held him tighter as he placed a trail of soft kisses along her neck until he reached the corner of her lips.

Buffy turned her head just a fraction, causing their lips to meet. The kiss wasn't necessarily one of desire or even of love. No, it was more an act of reassurance—both of them needing to know that the other was alright, that they were safe and whole.

"Why?" Angel finally whispered. "Why?"

Buffy pulled back to look at him incredulously. "Because you were going to die."

"You shouldn't have made me drink," Angel shook his head, his anger at her actions (and his own) seeping into his tone. "I could have killed you."

"But you didn't."

"Damn it, Buffy, that's not the point!" Angel rose to get up and Buffy leapt off his lap, her arms folding across her chest defensively.

"What you did was absolutely the stupidest thing you have _ever_ done," Angel snapped. "I could have killed you, don't you understand? What if I hadn't been able to stop? What if I'd killed you? Do you know what that would have done to me?"

Buffy felt tears pool in her eyes. "You were going to leave me," she whispered pleadingly. "I couldn't let you go."

Angel said nothing. He didn't even look at her, staring into the bare fireplace like it had all the answers to the universe.

"What if it'd been me, Angel?" Buffy asked softly. "If you knew that there was a way to save me, wouldn't you do it? Even if it meant you might die, you'd still do it to save me."

"Yes," Angel admitted after a second of silence. "I would."

"Then you can't be mad at me for something that you would have done," Buffy said quietly, but firmly.

"Fine," Angel agreed, still not thrilled, but he couldn't argue with her logic. She had a point. "But you can't ever ask me to do that again," he said, his voice sounding harsher than he'd intended, but he didn't regret it if he got his point across. "Ever. I will _never_ drink from you again."

Buffy pursed her lips. "Fine."

"Fine."

Buffy approached him then, wrapping her arms around his waist and burying her face in his chest. "I'm glad you're okay," she murmured.

"Right back at you," Angel replied quietly, holding her tighter.

"So," Buffy sighed as she pulled away. She was desperately trying to shrug off the tension their conversation had created. "I have a plan for graduation. You see, I really want the class of '99 to go out with a bang."

* * *

><p>An hour later at the library, Buffy had just finished telling all the Scoobies about her plan. "So am I crazy?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.<p>

Willow laughed nervously. "Well, crazy is such a _strong_ word…"

"Let's not rule it out though," Giles said thoughtfully, but warily.

"You don't think it can be done?" Buffy asked.

Giles pondered his words. "I didn't say that. I might…but not yet."

"I personally don't think it's possible to come up with a crazier plan," Cordelia said blithely.

Oz was more than willing to rise to the occasion. "We attack the Mayor with humus."

"I stand corrected."

"Just trying to keep things in prospective," Oz said with a shrug.

Cordelia scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Thank you. My point, however, is crazy or not, it's pretty much the only plan we have. Besides, it's Buffy's and you know she's Slay-gal—Ms. Little Likes To Fight. So…"

"I think there's a 'yea' vote in there somewhere," Xander interrupted dryly.

"Well, I'm gonna need every one of you on board," Buffy said seriously, her gaze landing on Xander. "Especially you Xander, you're sort of the key figure here."

Xander visibly swallowed his nerves. "Key? Me?" He took a deep breath, cataloguing his feelings. "Okay, pride, humility…and here is the mind-numbing fear…" he sighed. "What do you need me to do?"

"Do you remember any of your military training from when you were soldier guy?"

Xander pointed at her. "Uh, rocket launcher?"

"Rocket launcher isn't gonna cut it this time," Buffy frowned with regret. "I mean, it took a volcano to kill one of these things the last time."

Giles rose from his chair and came to stand beside Buffy, thinking that they had something more important to worry about other than weapons. "Uh, Buffy, all of this is rather dependent on your being able to control the Mayor."

"Faith told me to pray on his human weakness," she explained.

"Faith told you?" Willow repeated confused. "Was that before or after you put her into a coma?"

"After."

Willow opened her mouth, but no words came out. "Oh," she said lamely after a second, looking over at Oz as if he had the answer.

Oz shrugged.

"His weakness?" Giles repeated.

Buffy nodded. "Right."

"Which is?" Giles pursued.

"You know I do all this planning," Buffy complained, neatly dodging the question. "I'm in charge here even though I'm not really at my best…"

Giles put his glasses back on. "Right, let's, uh, let's think…"

"Well, Angel hung with him the most," Oz pointed out. "Is there something he's afraid of?"

Angel looked up from his place against the wall, away from the group. "Well, he's not too crazy about germs," he remembered, thinking of the time he'd spent in the Mayor's office.

"Of course, that's it! We attack him with germs!" Cordelia exclaimed and Angel wasn't sure if she was serious or not.

"Great!" Buffy said brightly—too brightly. "And then we can corner him and you can sneeze on him."

Cordelia began gesturing excitedly; leading Angel to believe that she was serious. "No, no! We'll get a box with the Ebola virus and…and…" Cordelia trailed off as she tried to formulate a plan. "Or it doesn't even have to be real. We can just get a box that says 'Ebola' on it, and…um…chase him…" she trailed off as Oz frowned and everyone else stared at her blankly. "…with the box…"

"I'm starting to lean more toward the humus offensive," Xander said after a beat of silence.

Oz was serious. "He'll never see it coming."

Angel was still thinking about a human weakness. He'd seen a lot of examples in his time, some good…some not so good. Angel's eyes fell on Buffy and the answer came to him. "Faith."

Buffy frowned. "Faith?"

"At the hospital he was grieving," Angel explained. "He's crazed and not just in a homicidal 'I-want-to-be-a-demon-way. She's his weak link."

"Faith," Buffy repeated quietly as a plan began to form in her mind. "I can work with that."

* * *

><p>The rest of the day was spent planning and organizing. Buffy had Willow and Oz on the explosives. They had all decided that it was only fitting for Giles to do the honors when the time came. Buffy sent the rest of the Scoobies among the student body, making sure that everyone had at least some sort of weapon.<p>

This was going to be a class effort.

Finally, the hour had arrived. Buffy was loitering in the shadows with Angel, Doyle, and Wesley, fiddling with her graduation cap.

"I really hate this color," she muttered. "It does nothing for my complexion."

Angel's lips twitched as he fought a smile. "I think you look beautiful."

"Thanks," Buffy said softly, a hint of sadness in her tone.

It was an unspoken notion that Angel would leave after the battle, if they lived through it of course. Neither of them had voiced it, but both of them were keenly aware of it.

"So," Doyle said lightly, looking for something to dissolve the tension in the air. "Guess you've seen a lot of wars in your time?" he asked Angel.

"Fourteen—not including Vietnam," Angel replied. "It was never declared."

"Ah."

"It's time," Buffy announced quietly seeing her fellow students begin moving toward their seats. "I better go."

Angel tugged on her hand as he moved to walk away, pulling her back to him. He kissed her hard, not caring who was watching. "I love you," he whispered against her lips.

Buffy pulled back and smiled. "I know," she assured him. "I love you too."

Immediately after her declaration, Buffy turned on her heel and walked toward the ceremony. She didn't look back. If this didn't work and she died, she didn't want her final picture of him to be one where she was moving away from him.

Buffy took her seat beside Willow, just as Snyder was shaking hands with the Mayor.

The Mayor took his place at the podium and launched into his speech, much to Buffy and Willow's surprise and annoyance.

"Oh my God," Buffy breathed, disbelieving. "He's gonna do the entire speech."

"Man, just ascend already!" Willow whispered fervently, ready to get the entire debacle over with.

"_Evil!"_ Buffy hissed in agreement.

The Mayor continued with his speech, and Buffy shifting restlessly in her seat. The suspense was going to kill her before anything else had the chance. Then, the sun began to fade, darkness overcoming the light. An eclipse—just like Wesley had told them earlier during their planning. Buffy knew the time was near.

Suddenly, the Mayor paused and winced in pain, causing Buffy to freeze in her seat. The Mayor forged through his speech despite the obvious pain he was in and its increasing level. He even got to the point where he was screaming in between sentences.

Then the Mayor began to shake violently, his hands gripping the podium so tightly that his knuckles were white and some of the wood cracked. Buffy and the rest of the class of '99 watched as the Mayor suddenly shot upward in the air, transforming into a big, black, ugly snake.

Screams erupted and parents and faculty began to scatter and flee, but the students held their positions. "Now!" Buffy commanded and they all took off their robes, revealing axes, swords, daggers and other assorted weaponry.

"Flame units!" Buffy gave the order and a large group of students with flame throwers began their assault on the Mayor. Buffy nodded at Xander, giving him control.

Buffy had her own attack to put into action.

She stood up on a chair, right in front of the Mayor who was swaying violently in the air. Reaching into her pocket, Buffy produced Faith's knife. "Hey!" she called and she immediately had the Mayor's attention. "You remember this? I took it from Faith! Stuck it in her gut! Just slid in her like butter!"

The Mayor growled and gnashed its pinchers together menacingly. It was working. "Wanna get it back from me? Dick?"

Without sparing another glance, Buffy tucked tail and ran into the high school. She burst through the doors, hearing the Mayor slithering along after her, destroying everything in his path, tearing through the school like a freight train. Buffy ran into the library and vaulted over the banister. She turned around to look behind her; feeling the foolish need to make sure the Mayor had followed her.

The Mayor barreled through the doors of the library, taking some of the wall with him.

Yep. He'd followed.

Buffy quickly ran towards the back of the library, launching herself out the window. She landed on her feet and sprinted toward Giles who was crouched behind some bushes, the detonator in his hand.

The moment Buffy was beside him, Giles clicked the detonator.

A loud explosion rocked them back onto the ground, and a huge fireball roared into the sky. A cacophony of explosions permeated the air, and Buffy could only watch as Sunnydale High crumbled and fell in a fiery dust of flames.

* * *

><p>Later, Buffy was walking through the maze of ambulances and police cars in front of the high school with Xander. "We got off pretty cheap," he said. "Considering."<p>

Buffy looked around, looking for one person in particular. "Seems like we did," she admitted.

They walked a few feet further when Buffy stopped, looking around completely. _Where was he?_

Xander realized who she was looking for. "He made it through the fight," he said as he buried his hands in his pockets. "Guess maybe he…" Xander paused, taking a breath, wondering how his words were going to affect his friend. "…took off afterwards."

Buffy didn't want to believe it. Would he really leave without saying goodbye?

She felt a hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Giles. "Are you alright?" he asked kindly.

"Tired," Buffy answered truthfully.

"I should imagine so," Giles said with a smile. "It's been quite a couple of days."

"I still haven't processed everything yet," Buffy admitted, with a big sigh before she laughed. "My brain really isn't functioning on higher levels. It's pretty much: fire—bad, tree—pretty."

"Understandable." Giles took a moment to revel in the pride that welled within him. His Slayer was truly something else. "Well, when it's working again, congratulate it on a good campaign. You did very well."

"Thank you," Buffy nodded with a small smile. "I will."

Giles suddenly remembered why he'd sought her out in the first place. He hastily put on his glasses. "I uh, managed to ferret this out of the wreckage. Now, it may not interest you, but," he trailed off as he retrieved Buffy's high school diploma. "I'd say you earned it," he finished as he placed it in Buffy's hand.

Taking a deep breath, Giles surveyed the scene. "There is a certain…dramatic irony that is attached to all of this," he observed, partly to himself and to Buffy. "A synchronicity that borders on, on predestination…"

Buffy gave him a deadpan look. "Fire—bad, tree—pretty."

Once again, Buffy shifted her attention to looking for Angel. Suddenly, a very familiar pair of strong arms wound around her waist. "Looking for me?"

Buffy turned in his embrace and threw her arms around his neck. "Angel."

They held each other for a second longer before Buffy pulled back to glare at him. "I thought for a minute you'd take off without saying goodbye. You know, just up and disappear in a haze of smoke."

Angel frowned. "I'd never do that to you," he said seriously. "You don't deserve that."

"So when will you leave?" Buffy asked softly.

"Tomorrow." Angel glanced over to their right, and Buffy followed his gaze, centering in on Wesley who was talking with Cordelia and Doyle. "I think Wes is comin' with me."

"I think that'd be good for him," Buffy said with a smile. "Personally, I'm wondering about Doyle and Cordy."

Angel chuckled. "Surprisingly? I think they're good for each other."

"Yeah?" Buffy smiled as she turned to look back at him. "That reminds me of another couple I know."

"Really?" Angel raised his eyebrows. "Who?"

"Well," Buffy said slowly, fiddling with a button of his shirt. "There's this girl—she's a vampire slayer. Then there's this guy, and, well, he's a vampire. You wouldn't really think that they'd make it work, but they do—even if this vampire has a crazy guilt-complex and broods about everything."

Angel chuckled and shook his head. "And the girl is foolish and makes snap decisions without considering the consequences."

"But they're good for each other." Buffy smiled as she wrapped her arms around Angel's waist and buried her face in his chest.

"Yeah," Angel agreed, kissing her hair and holding her tighter. "We're good for each other."

* * *

><p><strong>Wow! The End! It's finished! Done! I love it when a story comes together. It leaves me with this accomplished feeling. :D<strong>

**So, I'm not one to seriously ask for reviews, but I am for this chapter. I want to hear from you guys! Your words mean a lot to me and I want to have the chance to appreciate them. So all you silent readers out there, drop me a line please? Even if it's just a smiley face, that's okay, cause I'll be smiling right along with ya. :D**

**Alas, this me, signing off (again),**

**ArthursCamelot**

**P.S. Only TWO more days until _Love's Gift! _And, if you want don't want to count today, it's only ONE day away. Remember, Jan. 2!**

**See ya then!**


	34. Author's Note: New Story!

A/N: Okay guys, just telling you that my new story, the sequel to AISHB, "Love's Gift," is up!

Hope you check it out!


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